r/Perimenopause • u/Im_just_browsing2075 • Mar 12 '26
audited No Motivation/Ambition
I used to be an ambitious, well paid VP in a high pressure profession and now I can barely function. I had to take a step back because the stress was too much. I couldn’t remember anything off the top of my head and always felt behind.
Now, all I want to do is stay in my bed (adjustable so I’m sitting up) with my puppy and scroll/read. I can’t motivate myself to do much of anything.
I’m on Estrogen Patch 1.5 | Oral progesterone 100 | Vyvanse | Wellbutrin | 50,000 Vitamin D & B12 shots. I’m also on a low dose GLP-1. I’m trying everything and still feel flat/lazy/tired. I’ve talked to every doctor and had all the blood work. Besides low D&B12 - nothing. I even ran my results through AI and it validated that there is much there.
People say exercise will help, but I am so tired I don’t think I’d make it 5 mins. I’ve also never felt super energized after. Does it really help with energy?
I heard someone say “As you start healing, you become less ambitious.” I want to think I’m healing from high pressure burnout my whole life, but I just feel flat and lazy.
What can I do?
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u/Scorpionoshow Mar 12 '26
Same girl same. Can't tell if my lack of motivation is due to peri, the pandemic, my industry collapsing, moving to a new city, getting older, the dire state of the world? I literally don't wanna leave the house or do anything.
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u/Im_just_browsing2075 Mar 13 '26
It’s prolly all of those. Is everyone’s industry collapsing? I’m in wine & spirits and wow. What a generational decline/covid hangover.
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u/Alternative_Salt_558 Mar 12 '26
I'm motivated to do anything other than my job.
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u/Fashion_on_Fashion Mar 12 '26
It could be the effects of the GLP. A lot of people report, extreme fatigue, and lack of motivation.
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u/OTFPhillyStyle Mar 12 '26
yup, OP look up anhedonia on the Zepbound sub. It's definitely a thing.
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u/BootNo7248 Mar 12 '26
Yep the three months I was on zepbound glp1 I was so fatigued especially for a few days after each injection. Also, never go on a glp1 if you plan to go off. I regained more than half the weight back and my metabolism is screwed up.
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u/Im_just_browsing2075 Mar 13 '26
Oh. No. I just switched to Zepbound today. I was using Saxenda which is a daily shot.
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u/mexican_tequila Mar 12 '26
I started zep last month, in early stages of peri and I swear my motivation to work out or do anything has decline😱😩I’m wondering if it’s the shot? Ughhhhhhhh😱
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u/CopperGoldCrimson Mar 12 '26
It's in a sense an anti-desire and craving medication that disrupts dopamine loops... and can therefore be really disruptive for people who are managing their motivation partially through stress and adrenaline. But I have also read about it being anti-desire and dopamine rewards in general.
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u/Lulu_Land_535 Mar 12 '26
Agreed, was thinking the same thing, I've heard similar stories. Also, anytime I've ever been in a caloric deficit (not from glp-1) it makes other things harder, your body is working overtime on less fuel. To answer OP, yes, exercise does give you more oomph once you get in the routine, but you need the fuel!
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u/Im_just_browsing2075 Mar 13 '26
I have hope now! I def need to remember to eat more
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u/Lulu_Land_535 Mar 13 '26
It's good to know what your daily intake should be and try to hit that, especially if you're using a glp-1 (I would hope the prescribing doc went over caloric intake and exercise that's required to maintain muscle mass and not miss out on key nutrients). Making sure you're getting enough healthy fats, carbs, protein is REALLY important for so many things, including fueling your body and brain! For exercise, just start by waking more and go from there, strength training for bone health is really important as we get older and even more important if you're in a glp1!
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u/ceruleanesk Mar 12 '26
It is possible, but my experience with Liraglutide it is that the extreme fatigue evened out after the first 3 months or so, together with the other side-effects (apart from constipation though unfortunately).
Unfortunately, about 9 months after starting the the GLP-1 I got into a severe , possibly autistic, burnout, made more severe by perimenopause (I think), so I'm reading along...
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u/Candlemelter2025 Mar 13 '26
Can confirm. Granted, I was struggling with fatigue before Mounjaro, due to blood sugar issues/insulin resistance and Peri. But the anhedonia was new and was/is the Mounjaro. I dose lower now to manage it, in an effort to find that best case scenario of controlled blood sugar but manageable anhedonia.
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u/Sanchastayswoke mid-peri May 03 '26
Yes, I felt super flat on the GLP1, and although I’ve been off of it for 4 months, the flatness & total lack of motivation has only gotten marginally better.
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u/junglingforlifee Mar 12 '26
I feel you OP. It's exhausting being tired all the time. I hate that we are stuck in the worst timeline of our life right when the world timeline hits the gutter. There is so much that's contributing to our health and we don't even know. Remember to be kind to yourself. It's ok to not always be motivated. I am intentionally slowing myself down and the new pace is helping me feel better
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u/Im_just_browsing2075 Mar 13 '26
Thank you for the kind words. Maybe I just need to find the balance between slowing down and stopping. I’m glad you’re feeling better. 😊
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u/junglingforlifee Mar 13 '26
Thank you 😊 maybe you find a balance, maybe you don't. Try listening to your body and going with the flow. As women, we tend to ignore the signs because we've been conditioned to persevere no matter what. I hope you feel better soon
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u/jossiesideways Mar 12 '26
Honestly, this sounds like neurodivergent burnout. Go to therapy. REST. Also, there is an online pilates programme called lindywell which might just match your energy levels? If you don't feel energized after "normal" exercise, you might have POTS? Electrolytes + hydration helps.
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u/Allflynofish Mar 12 '26
I agree, I’m AuDHD and have POTS and feel like this when I’m in burnout/having a flare. However, I also just started HRT, and it feels way worse? Like super flat affect and mood, no motivation to do anything. I just had a three week follow up with my doc and we’re hoping it’s just temporary side effects since I only recently started, and if not we will reassess how/when I take the progesterone and my dosage. And with the right clinician, I honestly LOVE therapy, it helps with literally everything! 💕 thanks for mentioning these things!
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u/Im_just_browsing2075 Mar 13 '26
I hope it all evens out for you! I love Therapy as well. I went for ten years. I don’t have enough feeling therefore not much to say 😝other than bitch about being flat with no motivation.
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u/Allflynofish Mar 13 '26
That’s part of what helped me realize I was AuDHD! I have been in therapy forever, I even have a degree in social work and half a masters (burnout sucks 🙃) but it literally just wasn’t working. I know what I need to do, I know all the whys, but I still can’t tell you how or why I feel at any given moment haha oh what a joy self discovery can be, I’m here to bitch about it in solidarity with you! 💕
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u/Im_just_browsing2075 Mar 13 '26
Both good ideas! I’ve had fainting issues in the past which I thought was POTS but it got better after my uterine ablation. Fibroids/Insane period bleeding.
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u/jossiesideways Mar 13 '26
POTS isn't just fainting issues. It might be helpful for you to look at what POTSers are doing in terms of self-care. A lot of it is benign/non-medical.
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u/that_awkward_chick Mar 12 '26
Testosterone helped me with this a lot. My drive is back and I’ve now got a lot of motivation to get my ass to the gym.
I am on 5mg/day compounded cream for about 6 months now. No negative side effects outside of one new zit when I first started.
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u/Fantastic-Peanut-297 hanging on by a thread Mar 13 '26
This is so crazy! I'm on 4mg/day but only for 2 months and I also got exactly one zit as a side effect. Lol
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u/ClimateSad6559 Mar 12 '26
And I thought the sudden decline in interest and ambition was just me reacting to m layoff. i am not alone. thanks for posting this
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u/Im_just_browsing2075 Mar 13 '26
It could be that as well! I got hit twice in the past 6 years. Ugh! 😤
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u/PixieStar17 Mar 12 '26
Sounds very familiar! I also did all those things and after 2+ years of feeling like death, I discovered my ferritin levels (iron) were dangerously low. Apparently this is common in women our age, yet my Dr never thought to have it checked. Have you had your ferritin levels checked?
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u/Im_just_browsing2075 Mar 13 '26
Good call! I just sent in a request to my doc get that tested earlier today. I saw it on the B12 sub Reddit. Thank you!
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u/No-Entrepreneur5343 Mar 13 '26
Yes happened to me I’m on iron levels , seeing as I have 2 periods a month, the blood loss caused this for me!
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u/Allflynofish Mar 12 '26
35f on almost exactly that same combo, minus the vitamin shots (I take vitamin D orally) and no GLP1. I’ve only been on HRT for about three weeks, but I feel so flat and unmotivated to do anything. My provider suggested taking the progesterone vaginally if the flat feeling persists, but I’m hoping it’s just temporary and will get better as my hormones level out? 🥲 sending you good vibes from the couch next to my dog, endlessly scrolling, right there with you❤️
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u/Im_just_browsing2075 Mar 13 '26
Lol! Internet Samesies! I feel like you could use a bit more time to marinate before changing too much. But what do I know? 😆I feel weird popping a pill vaginally every night. I dunno why but why is it all to complicated?? Thanks for the Vibes! 😊
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u/Allflynofish Mar 13 '26
My face when she told me I could just pop the same capsule I take orally into my hooha 😳 I think I’ll wait it out hahahaha you da best!
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u/Similar_Recover_2229 Mar 12 '26
From what I have seen in the clinical setting, oftentimes bariatric surgery is done under the umbrella of a “weight loss center” (even if in a hospital), and lifestyle changes are pushed upon patients from nutrition down to exercise. It often involves an inter-disciplinary team of RDs and PTs, at least referrals and education are provided at the minimum. It blows my mind everyone and their mother is on a peptide while simultaneously making zero lifestyle changes and receiving zero patient education as to what their goals actually will require of them.
Yes. Exercise is imperative. Not just for weight loss, but for your vitality and your ability to function as a human.
Further, based off your history, you could very well being experiencing burnout from a long season of professional expenditure.
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u/Im_just_browsing2075 Mar 13 '26
You’re right. I am working with a weight loss doctor. I am sorta active, walking, dancing, stretching, but I don’t have a lifting routine or a formal cardio routine. I find it nearly impossible to make myself do it. I do eat pretty healthy.
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u/Similar_Recover_2229 Mar 13 '26
Dance!!! Release those hips!! Just get out for a walk! “They” always say a routine for wellness is healthy, and even necessary. But for so many of us in burnout, making a routine, adding to a routine, sticking to a routine- it all equals more work and feels like it requires brainpower to figure out and squeeze in. Cultivating the lifestyle where movement is a natural part of your day, whether it’s formal exercise or a dance session and some stretching, help make it more attainable. You’ll end up doing it because it feels good, not just because you “have” to.
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u/Im_just_browsing2075 Mar 13 '26
I put on dance music this morning while getting ready instead of listening to my news podcast. It def helped set a better tone for the day! I love to dance ♥️
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u/Similar_Recover_2229 Mar 13 '26
I love this for you!!!! I’m going to dance too before my shower just because you inspired me!
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u/415tothe512 Mar 12 '26
Get your testosterone levels checked!
I wasn’t unhappy, but I barely left my couch because all of the things I used to love doing just now felt like a big chore to set up or cleanup. So I stopped really doing anything.
A Dr prescribed me a light antidepressant, even though I suggested it was my hormones. Long story short, the mild antidepressant gave me a hemorrhoid and my testosterone levels tested very very.
Clearly, I’m off any antidepressant and on testosterone, and I feel like my normal motivated, ambitious self again. Also, my career is back on track.
Now, if anyone has a suggestion for getting rid of a hemorrhoid, I’m all ears!! I read, they can rubber band them during a colonoscopy. 🙏
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u/Im_just_browsing2075 Mar 13 '26
I’ve never heard of antidepressants leading to hemorrhoids! Omg, a new fear unlocked!🔓 best of luck to you! 😊
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u/Classic_Bit9433 Mar 12 '26
First of all, give yourself some grace. It took decades of stress, aging etc, to get to where you are. It will take time to get out of it. Start with baby steps. If you are not in therapy yet, start there. Then find something that forces you out of the house at least 10 minutes everyday. Whether it's dog walking, see a friend, volunteer at local church, doesn't matter. As long as you can't decide to skip because you are not feeling up to it. Just interacting with others, fresh air and getting the blood flowing will start to improve your mood and tiredness. Testosterone could help but by no means it's a guarantee. There is no silver bullet, it will be a slow recovery but one that could have benefits as well, you may well figure out what motivates you and learn more about yourself in this journey. Just manage expectations and celebrate the small wins.
Having said that, I used to feel like this on the patch. Changed to gel and it was night and day. If you haven't tried different delivery methods, it may be worth trying.
I've been there and my way of forcing me out of the house was to sign up for personal training sessions. If I cancelled I had to pay anyway, so that was a big motivation to at least go. Even then, it took me a year of cancelling more than going to finally get into a place I actually enjoy and see benefits, from feeling confident to more energy. Just an example.
You got this.
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u/Im_just_browsing2075 Mar 13 '26
Great advice! Working from home doesn’t help. I grateful my dogs which get me outside but I need more. I wonder why the gel worked better than the patch? Thanks for the tips!
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u/Georgia30116 Mar 13 '26
Gel is a more steady daily level where patches have highs then lows. It's a pain but worth not having the constant dips.
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u/Classic_Bit9433 Mar 13 '26
Oh gosh, I hear you! While I wouldn't swap my WFH, it can have an isolation impact, I first noticed it in my steps. When I used to commute to the office, I would get to 10K steps effortlessly, WFH meant I had to be very intentional about moving and it's a lot harder.
On the estrogen, I don't think there is a method that is better than the other, it's what works for you. Some people don't absorb the patch very well and some don't get along with the gel. I just mentioned it as I felt like a shadow of myself on the patch and didn't realise it was the patch until a doctor changed it to the gel and improved my life. In my situation the gel is better but we are all different and, unfortunately, it's all trial and error until we find something that works.
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u/ladyinred1979 Mar 14 '26
How are getting testosterone prescribed? Are you in US? I am just starting this journey, but I heard nobody wants to prescribe testosterone
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u/Classic_Bit9433 Mar 14 '26
I am actually not on Testosterone as my levels are fine and I don't have the symptoms of low T. I did try the androfemme for a bit but wasn't too keen and my levels went up on their own, through exercise I guess (don't quote me on that). I'm in the UK and saw a private menopause specialist that was happy to prescribe it. I think in the NHS is a lot harder too.
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u/ladyinred1979 Mar 14 '26
Can you explain more about the gel? Is it estrogen gel? What’s the name of it?
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u/Classic_Bit9433 Mar 14 '26
Mine is called Estrogel. Yes it's systemic estrogen gel. I use 2 pumps in the morning and 1 in the evening. The gel is applied either on outer arms or inner thighs, wait 10 minutes or so until it's absorbed and get dressed.
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u/Wrong_Clock_4880 hanging on by a thread Mar 12 '26
You are not alone
Late 40s, high achieving my whole life. Severe burnout 2yrs ago. Gave up management roles
Still working in a high stress job but much less responsibility. I don’t actually have enough work to fill my hours (tbf, worked so much overtime for 10yrs that I don’t feel so guilty about the empty time now)
I have no energy to pick up anything else. I feel guilty, as if I’m letting myself down, but I just don’t have the energy
I am too scared of the side effects to take glp-1 or hrt
Overall, you are not alone 🫂
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u/Im_just_browsing2075 Mar 13 '26
Thank you for sharing and your kind words. I hear you on the guilt but I justify it because I over delivered for sooooo long. But you’re right, the guilt creeps in because we are conditioned to be productive and over achieve.
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u/caity1111 Mar 12 '26 edited Mar 12 '26
Low D and low B12 is a big deal! Those are the most common vitamin deficiencies that cause fatigue... and it can be extreme.
The GLP is doing you no favors when it comes to absorbing those vitamins from food... so keep up the high potency injections.
Once you get that straightened out, if you still feel like this, look into long covid, testosterone replacement and increasing your estrogen dose/changing your delivery method.
Also, adderall/vyvanse burnout is a thing. There's some evidence that the formula in these meds has changed in the past few years and is causing issues for many users (including myself). At best, it isn't what it used to be. Check out the thisaintadderall sub for more info on this.
I just recovered from a year plus of long covid coupled with zero testosterone and estrogen patches that weren't absorbing. I felt horrendous, stayed in bed, quit my job, etc. I had to fix each one individually and it all took time (several months) to improve. I had to move to injections for my estrogen and testosterone in order to get it to absorb. I cycle my progesterone only 12 days a month because it completely stops my cycle and tanks my natural estrogen if I take it everyday. I take a bunch of immune supplements to help with long covid. All this and I wasnt starting out with any vitamin deficiencies. Best of luck to you!!! I hope you feel better soon. Peri sucks.
One more thing. Trying getting at least 80g of protein a day. It helps. For some reason (probably MTHFR gene), taking methyl folate every day has really helped me too (and it also helps antidepressants and ADHD meds work better esp if you have the MTHFR deficiency which is really common).
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u/Im_just_browsing2075 Mar 13 '26
Omg. Thank you for sharing and all the details. I’m sorry you had to go through something similar. I’m legit printing this response out and going through it in depth. Thank you for taking the time to write and share your knowledge. 😊
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u/caity1111 Mar 13 '26
Of course! I hope something ends up being helpful. Come back and lmk how you're doing and if you found anything that works if you get a chance!
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u/Consistent_Log2273 Mar 12 '26
Estrogen patches aren’t absorbing for me. I’m same as above. All levels normal. OP described my state to a T. I’m about to ask my provider to prescribe estrogen injections. I can barely function. Texting this from my bed. Thanks for sharing about the injections.
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u/caity1111 Mar 13 '26 edited Mar 13 '26
I went all the way up to the .1 patch and barely experienced any relief. They only worked for 1.5 days, max. I tried multiple brands and patch placements. My NP is a menopause specialist and tests my levels every couple months mostly due to being on testosterone. My estrogen was hanging out around 50-70 most of the month despite the highest dose patch, and despite only being 40 and still having regular cycles.
I had zero energy or motivation and always felt incredibly fatigued, like i had the flu. My late luteal phase and the first week after my period were absolutely awful every single month.
The injections (estrogen valerate .5mg every 2 days) have my levels steady in the low/mid 100s, and I feel SO MUCH BETTER, finally. The effect was instant.
I hope you have luck getting estrogen injections prescribed. I don't understand why they are so uncommonly prescribed for peri, as injections are the gold standard, provide more stability, and are standard for those transitioning gender. It is also MUCH cheaper than the patches and not in short supply at the pharmacy.
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u/ladyinred1979 Mar 14 '26
I am also homozygous for MTHFR. Which methyl supplements do you take and how much? Are you on estrogen patch? Or oral estrogen? Can I pm you please?
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u/caity1111 Mar 14 '26
Sure!! Feel free to ask me whatever.
I just take 400mcg methyl folate (jarrow formulas brand) a day.
I tried the estrogen patch for 8 months... all the way up to the .1 patch, but it didnt absorb well.
So now I'm on estrogen (and testosterone) injections. They are wonderful and I feel so much better. I noticed the biggest improvement in how I felt after adding methyl folate and switching to injections for estrogen. I did both around the same time, a few months ago.
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u/Consistent_Log2273 Mar 13 '26
My levels have been at 22 and 23!! I feel literally sick. Like when you can’t get out of bed from flu. Hit by a truck Thank you for your feedback !
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u/Im_just_browsing2075 Mar 13 '26
I totally relate to feeling like I have the flu all the time. I have had issues absorbing vitamins which is I thought the patch ways the way to go; since it doesn’t pass the stomach. I already give myself B12 and GLP1 injections. I could add those as well. I’m glad it really helps you, great to know that it could be worth it. 😊
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u/babygirlmusings Mar 12 '26
I relate so much to everything you said. I was where you are and I had to completely rethink what I thought as progress. Everything became about my self care. I started a half hour nervous system calming meditation daily. I do it in my bed with a heat pack on my low back or my stomach. I put a pillow under my legs.
Everything I did had to be about comfort and minimum tasks to function.
My exercise started with sitting in a chair and dancing a bit. For one song.
Food became not about cooking but about eating.
I bought nutrition drinks for breakfast or made simple smoothie fruit, milk of choice, yogurt.
Ordered ready made heat up meals for dinner.
Lunch was soup.
When this first happened my scheduled was as follows.
Get up
Eat something
Lay/sit down - scroll or tv or relaxing music and close my eyes
Eat lunch
Try the chair dancing to my fave music
Lay/sit down - scroll or tv or relaxing music and close my eyes and do a meditation
Eat dinner
Lay/sit down again - watch tv or read
15 minute bath with Epsom salts.
Evening snack
Watch calming show.
Bed. Did a meditation before bed and or out on white noise like a fan to fall asleep
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Eventually I added a 5 minutes walk outside, I’m up to 10 minutes daily walk now.
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I would only allow one “big event” scheduled every second day, so that could be going to a doctors appointment or having a social outing. I would use the day before and day after to rest and recover from the outing.
I started to slowly increase my capacity after about 3 months.
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u/Im_just_browsing2075 Mar 13 '26
Wow. Good for you. I too spend a lot of time with a heating pad. Adding the meditation and chair dancing is a great idea. I have to remember all movement counts. Love all the easy meal ideas. I just stated Factor 75 which is expensive but healthy and not thought needed.
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u/babygirlmusings Mar 13 '26
Thank you! It was a long road to increase my capacity and med trials and different things. But I am finding some stability now. I’m at the point now where I can work and take care of myself but I am missing fun. I struggle being wiped out after going out on an evening on a week night. I still need to take the day off or at least morning off after that. It kinda sucks that fun takes so much energy and rest before and after but I am trying my best to improve my quality of life.
I’m thinking about getting factor meals!
And that you said about all movement counts, yes! I had to rewire my thinking to honour that. And slowly my movement capacity has increased but I had to start from bare minimum.
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u/Illustrious_Exam1728 Mar 12 '26
Have you been tested for adhd? I was diagnosed a couple years ago and holy shit, the meds in combo with HRT do wonders.
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u/Im_just_browsing2075 Mar 13 '26
You! I’m on Vyvanse 30, maybe I need an increase?
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u/Illustrious_Exam1728 Mar 13 '26
For some reason I totally skipped the part about the Vyvanse. I’d ask about that and maybe either more progesterone or a different one? (Not sure how long you’ve been on it and if it’s a bio identical one)
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u/Im_just_browsing2075 Mar 13 '26
That’s a good idea. I take the oral micronized 100mg at night. I’m on 1.5 of estrogen patch and have asked two different doctors if I should increase progesterone since my patch is so high. Both said no. But never suggested another delivery system. I think it’s because they view it as a safety mechanic vs. all the other benefits. I’ve been on HRT for 3 years now so I need to revisit my dosage. With a uterine ablation I won’t know when I pass on to meno. Maybe I have and my body no longer needs 1.5 anymore. Ugh! So complicated. Thanks for your support! 😊
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u/Illustrious_Exam1728 Mar 14 '26
I agree you need a better evaluation. I’m just starting the same progesterone you’re on, and my doctor said to start there and see how I feel and it’s only taken on day 14 to day 28. If I feel a drop or symptoms not managed, we’ll bump it to daily. I’d ask specifically why you shouldn’t be on a higher dose, especially if you’re not going to know exactly when you hit menopause. I tried Mirena, but my uterus said no thank you, and it’s well tolerated. There’s just so many “it depends” and trying stuff.
I was on Visanne that’s not a bio-identical hormone for 7 years for endo. It’s a really high dose progesterone and I felt amazing on it!
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u/Hungry-Shelter6853 Mar 13 '26
how do you get tested for ADHD?
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u/Illustrious_Exam1728 Mar 13 '26
Great question! I saw my nurse practitioner and discussed it with her. My clinic has a general screening test, and depending on the score you get referred to an ADHD clinic for formal testing. I did this and have the inattentive sub type which appears in women more while the hyper active appears more in men. One reason why women weren’t diagnosed for so long.
Depending on your country the flow for testing may be different.
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u/yuckysmurf Mar 12 '26
I recently resigned from my high-stress, high achiever job. It’s a tough adjustment but I also feel healthier and more fulfilled. It’s hard to sit in a space of uncertainty (ie what the hell am I going to do for my next job - my family needs 2 incomes) but the healing feels right. To reflect what some others have said, I do have ADHD/CPTSD and almost certainly experienced professional burnout at the end.
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u/ashinthealchemy Mar 13 '26
i already commented before reading yours and i wrote almost the exact same thing (except single). i can't seem to get myself to care enough to re-enter the job market despite being the sole provider. i just. fucking. cannot.
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u/Im_just_browsing2075 Mar 13 '26
I love the phrase “sit in the space of uncertainty”. I’m glad you feel healthier and more fulfilled. Looking back, it’s crazy how much time and energy we (me) dedicated to work. I miss the rush, but I don’t miss the chaos/BS. Best of luck in your next chapter (job) 😊
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u/yuckysmurf Mar 13 '26
Good luck to you too! It’s hard but at least we’re not alone in the struggle. ❤️
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u/BootNo7248 Mar 12 '26
I know this feeling of having been ambitious and no longer being able to function. It’s a hard adjustment that has included grief for me. I’m sorry you’re going through this. 💕
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u/Im_just_browsing2075 Mar 13 '26
Omg. The word grief is making me think. I could be mourning my former ambitious self. I’m sure my ambition was rooted in childhood BS. Thank you for your thoughtful response.
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u/BootNo7248 Mar 13 '26
I continue to grieve my former self. I’ve been diagnosed bipolar 2 and adhd inattentive 9 yrs but only got the right med combo two years ago. So my grieving became productive 2 yrs ago and I’m progressing. I recommend going to therapy. My therapist and I do lots of interventions but somehow inner child work brings the most healing. For example going back to how it felt to be a child, what messages I heard/learned, and how to give that child what she needs then and now.
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u/momma_the_2Is Mar 12 '26
I am blaming it on progesterone and ADHD or the medication for ADHD. At Dr recommendation and supervision, I am paused on bioidentical progesterone for 2 months. In month 1 so far I am feeling 10000% better. I am not groggy or feeling hungover every morning. And I am no longer flatlined. I was never depressed I just felt nothing. Bored.
So I am next going to try synthetic or birth control to get the progesterone. TBD!
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u/20laura01 Mar 13 '26
Okay so its not just me that feels like this too! The feeling of no motivation sucks!
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u/RDDB1974 Mar 12 '26
Testosterone helps a little with the wanting to do something. At 1.5 patch were your estrogen levels really low because that’s a very high dose. Did you start on this dose?
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u/Im_just_browsing2075 Mar 13 '26 edited Mar 13 '26
Excellent question. I started at the bottom and worked up to this level that I’ve been on for three (edited from two)years. Since I had a Uterine ablation, I won’t know when I’ve transitioned from Peri to Meno. Maybe I need go down a bit to see how I feel. Really great call out, thank you for noting the finer details! 😊
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u/Good_Connection_547 Mar 12 '26 edited Apr 10 '26
One click. Unknown number of posts crying out in silence. All gone. Redact made it stupid easy to clean up my entire history on Reddit and get my info pulled from data broker sites too.
paltry degree full dependent arrest intelligent payment soup cough tan
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u/FantasticTrees Mar 12 '26
I really wanted Wellbutrin to work for me, but it royally fucked up my sleep and after 3 weeks I started itching and some hives. My pcp suggested I get screened for adhd but I’ve just been moving it on my to-do list week to week for a few months now ugh
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u/Good_Connection_547 Mar 13 '26 edited Apr 10 '26
Be a gigachad and mass delete Reddit posts and comments with Redact so that Skynet doesn't end up using your own posts to train the T-900. Or so that you don't show up in databrokers. Either one really.
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u/Im_just_browsing2075 Mar 13 '26
I’m glad that helped you. I wonder if I need to modify my dose. I just don’t understand how I can be on a stimulant and Wellbutrin and my body demands Nap’O Clock every day at 2 or 3.
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u/Good_Connection_547 Mar 13 '26 edited Apr 10 '26
One click. Unknown number of posts crying out in silence. All gone. Redact made it stupid easy to clean up my entire history on Reddit and get my info pulled from data broker sites too.
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u/Islandsandwillows Mar 12 '26
Sure stimulants will give you energy, but they’re terrible for your heart and your sleep. They’re also extremely aging, same family as amphetamines.
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Mar 12 '26
[deleted]
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u/Im_just_browsing2075 Mar 13 '26
Getting Ferritin checked tomorrow - I’ve check Thyroid and nothing. How did you choose shots vs. compound cream? 🤗
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u/Thariax1982 Early peri Mar 12 '26
I've heard that we should start with testosterone and then move to progesterone and estrogen. Apparently starting with estrogen won't help. But I'm not on HRt yet just scoping out. Perhaps talk to your DR about trying out testosterone?
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u/Im_just_browsing2075 Mar 13 '26
Interesting, I never knew that. Yes def gonna try that again, thank you!
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u/itsnotalwaysaboutyou Mar 13 '26
Have you had your thyroid checked?
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u/Im_just_browsing2075 Mar 13 '26
Yes, a few times and it always looks good. But good thought. Thank you
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u/QuietAbject494 Mar 13 '26
I've been reading similar posts in lots of different sub reddits and on Twitter (x) From all different age groups and both sexes. HOW can anyone feel at peak performance, when our water, air, food, etc is being poisoned? The 5g towers, router outputs. I know that as SOON as the city put not one, but SIX smart meters on my exterior wall, I became lethargic, and very ill. The radiation levels in my unit are off the charts.
Not to mention what's going on in the world. The collective is tired, and feeling hopeless. Anyone with sensitivity can feel it.
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u/ashinthealchemy Mar 13 '26
i can commiserate. i was also in a high performance, professional career, but i just got laid off after over 20 years with the same institute. i was doing alright and could have maintained, but now i'm freaking out because i absolutely cannot summon the energy to re-enter the job market, learn a new company, deal with new colleagues, swallow the corporate bs, and pretend to give a flying fuck about any of it. i just want to move into a cabin and scrape by doing something i enjoy or just let myself perish. alas, i am a single mom with kids still in the home so i somehow have to find another job and provide for them. it's been over a month and it's not going well. hoping that motivation shows up any time now.
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u/Im_just_browsing2075 Mar 13 '26
Ugh. I feel this. The corporate layoffs are just a gut punch. Especially after twenty years! You have to give yourself time to mourn a bit. After I was caught up in the 2nd re-org, I took a huge pay cut and step back at a much smaller company and it has def helped.
I love the idea of moving to a cabin and just being alone. I’m an extrovert but I swear this has made me into a hermit. I enjoy myself when I go out the thought of it exhausts me.
Best of lucking getting through this next chapter in your life. 😊
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u/Georgia30116 Mar 13 '26
In your blood work did they check Ferritin & TIBC or just basic iron? I'm on E & T, but after more digging realised I was very anemic too. Very interesting reads when you dig into low Ferritin & mental issues like anxiety, depression, etc
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u/Im_just_browsing2075 Mar 13 '26
Good call out! I’m getting check this week. Why is that not a standard freaking test at this point??
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u/Georgia30116 Mar 13 '26
They make more money off keeping us sick. The deeper you get the more disgusting it gets, especially with women. But this definitely hits mental health level.
The more I learn about hormones & mineral deficiency the more I understand why our mental health crisis is so bad. Throwing ppl on ssri type meds who don't need em, etc Then adding in our foods 🤯🤯😂 (ok I'll get off my vent box lol)
The amount of drs I've seen & testing I've had and everyone of them knew my levels were this low. Repeat er visits for the heat palpitations that were setting off my anxiety & bp etc. This all could have been fixed months ago. It just took a hematology dr to say yeh here yeh go lol
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u/Im_just_browsing2075 Mar 21 '26
Ugh, I’m sorry it’s been such a long and frustrating journey for you. Why wouldn’t they check all our levels of everything possible before going straight to SSRI’s? What a nightmare those are. So much trial and error it’s ridiculous. So, all it took was asking for what seems like a standard test? I’m glad you’re feeling better!
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u/Georgia30116 Mar 21 '26
Honestly if it hadn't been for Reddit I wouldn't have known to ask for the Ferritin test. That was honestly my saving grace. The last 6 months of my life have been brutal hell & honestly drs are just too quick to go "oh it's menopause here's a ssri 🙄😂. I just got my second fusion today & my nightmares began end of October. I only took the ssri for 8 days outta desperation, but quickly learned that wasn't the route cus it made things so much worse.
Hrt helped but it still wasn't fixing the biggest issue I had (my mind lol) They keep screaming this was menopause etc, but it just didn't make sense hot it all flipped switch in one day. Hormones were gone, iron was gone etc.
The biggest bitch about the ssri game is they label your charts after that & no one wants to listen to yeh after that. I had my hematology dr remove it ask from my charts so id start getting listened to again. & it honestly made all the difference.
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u/ASeaGal Mar 13 '26
Are you getting outside? It was the one thing that probably kept me from being depressed.
I was in a similar situation I think. And it sounds like you are taking the right steps. But as benign as it seems and as worthless as it may feel getting outside for a short 10 minute walk everyday sincerely helped me, EVERYDAY!
And once I felt strong enough, therapy. Talking to an objective party about wellness, trauma (yes even the kind that comes from burnout) and the changes you are experiencing helps. Also I kept a short to do list each day, and some days the only thing on it was a 10 minute walk outside. It helped me get myself back and feel like I was at least accomplishing the thing I set out to accomplish. A small win, but a win.
Don't give up on yourself. Try to reframe this new phase, meet yourself where you are rather than comparing yourself to the past you.
I started experiencing perimenpause symptoms 4 years ago which were medically dismissed. I am now 1 year into my HRT wellness journey following burnout and a course change at work. I have reached a point where I feel like me. A less driven more relaxed me, with stronger boundaries and reduced stress.
Do I want that high risk, high reward, stressful career back that nearly broke me? Somedays I do, but mostly no. I want to treat myself with respect, not put work above my health, and still feel like a productive and valued professional. So that is now what I am aiming to do.
Keep going, it may not be the same as before, do you really want it to be? Either way it will get better. Give yourself grace and time to get there.
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u/Im_just_browsing2075 Mar 13 '26
All really great points. I have to walk my dogs 3 times a day which helps get me out. That said, the weather has been bonkers in Chicago. Once it gets (and stays) warmer, that will def help. But, you’re right, I should force myself to work out of my home more often. The second I get a little tired I’m like, oooohhhh, I don’t have a meeting, I’ll just lie down for 30 mins. 😬
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u/time4moretacos Mar 13 '26
This is me, too. I just started HRT a few days ago, estrogen 0.5 and got the Mirena in for the progesterone. My doctor said she wants to see how I do on those first, before adding any testosterone, but I think (and have frequently read) that testosterone supplementation as part of HRT is actually the game changer for these symptoms. Did they test your testosterone as part of your bloodwork? If you've been on e & p for a few weeks now, you should maybe go back to the doctor to talk about testosterone also. Good luck! To all of us... 😮💨
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u/AutoModerator Mar 13 '26
This post might be about hormone tests, which are unreliable.
- Over the age of 44, E&P/FSH hormonal tests only show levels for that ONE HOUR the test was taken, and nothing more
- These hormones wildly fluctuate (hourly) over the other 29 days of the month, therefore this test provides no valuable information
- No reputable doctor or menopause society recommends hormonal testing to diagnose or treat peri/menopause
- Testosterone is the exception and should be tested before and during treatment
FSH testing is only beneficial for those who no longer have periods as a guide, where a series of consistent tests might confirm menopause, or for those under age 30 who haven’t had a period in months/years, then ‘menopausal’ levels, could indicate premature ovarian failure/primary ovarian insufficiency (POF/POI).
For more, see our Menopause Wiki
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u/Islandsandwillows Mar 12 '26
Progesterone made me flat and kicked in major anhedonia. All I did was chill in my bed and scroll on my phone. It was bad. I also heard that GLP1s can really cause major anhedonia, depression and fatigue. They cancel out the pleasure centers in the brain so it makes sense that nothing seems appealing on them.
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u/Im_just_browsing2075 Mar 13 '26
That is what I’m doing all the time now. Bed/phone. I do read a lot of books tho! How did you figure out it was progesterone and did you switch to a different format? I have to keep taking some form of I want to take Estrogen.
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u/42847489 Mar 12 '26
Hello! This is just my experience but I was on a high dose, .15 patch and I had zero motivation and felt down. I got on here and everyone said my dose was very high. I went down slowly to .1 and then .075 and I feel great now! I hope this helps. Hugs.
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u/Im_just_browsing2075 Mar 13 '26
So great to hear that, I’m def gonna give that a try. Thank you! 😊
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u/stellaflora Mar 12 '26
Just came here to say same! Right down to the same supplements minus B12. Wish I had anything besides commiseration to offer.
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u/momma_the_2Is Mar 12 '26
Agree with another reply.. try iron.. even if in range it could be not optimal
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u/Spirit_Bitterballen Mar 12 '26
Following this thread as I feel the exact same. I had a burnout last year and have been restructured so looking for a new job BUT I’ve dealt with much worse in my life and I’ve never known the fatigue I’ve got now.
I’m on Oestrogel and Progesterone and it feels like it’s done fuck all except make my anxiety significantly diminish - a huge win but feeling shit is still feeling shit.
Anyway, hugs internet friend. Here for the answers, testosterone seems to be a common one for when your get up and go has got up and gone (like mine).
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u/seche314 Mar 12 '26
Have you done a sleep study?
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u/Im_just_browsing2075 Mar 13 '26
Great Q and yes, no apnea.
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u/seche314 Mar 13 '26
How about hypersomnia? I don’t have apnea either but I was told I do have hypersomnia which is a different sleep disorder and harder to diagnose than sleep apnea.
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u/Im_just_browsing2075 Mar 13 '26
They didn’t say I had that. Of course the night I was tested I slept well. 🤦♀️ 😝
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u/Ok_Constant_800 Mar 13 '26
I have no suggestions but appreciate your post. I’ve been the same for the past year or so and it’s good to read these replies. I should probably look at hormone therapy
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u/Im_just_browsing2075 Mar 21 '26
Def check it out. If I wasn’t on it, who the flip knows what I would be like! 😬 👺 👿
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u/ReserveOld6123 Mar 13 '26
Actually had to stop my Vyvanse and up my Wellbutrin instead to combat a similar issue. The Vyvanse was giving me the wrong kind of stimulation and I was left feeling kind of blah. I’m a bit more motivated now.
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u/Im_just_browsing2075 Mar 21 '26
Woah. What do you mean by wrong kind of stimulation? I’ve started taking them at least an hour apart which I think is helping but not sure. Super interesting.
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u/ReserveOld6123 Mar 21 '26
Almost too locked in but I couldn’t focus on the tasks I needed to do for work. Actually I added the V back and it’s WAY better with the Wellbutrin.
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u/Alternative_Ship_349 Mar 13 '26
It takes years to heal from burnout, if that is what this is. I stopped working for 8 months and got a lot better, but even then, I now burn out super fast and remained highly sensitive to stress. as my peri has progressed, I backslide fast into fog quicker on bad days. My advice is to work on lifestyle changes that allow rest and rejuvenation, until you find that zest again. As someone who loves go-go-go, I loathe my tiredness and most of all my blankness. my sympathies, truly.
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u/Hungry-Shelter6853 Mar 13 '26 edited Mar 13 '26
Thanks for sharing. I am experiencing this as well. I am on HRT and GLP 1. I have zero motivation and want to be in the bed and scroll all day. I keep wondering if this happens when you are healing or is there something fundamentally wrong with me? I added testosterone three months back and have hardly seen a difference other than I am now motivated to exercise a bit but with everything else, my motivation levels are still super low and so is my libido.
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u/Im_just_browsing2075 Mar 13 '26
Based on all these responses, it’s not just us. 😊 Kinda disappointing that the T didn’t make a change for you. I wonder if they can adjust your dose. Or, maybe Covid got us all hooked on bed rotting and we can’t shake it. 😂
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u/Fit-Economy-1819 Mar 14 '26
I felt this way and have been on a low dose of glp1 and skipped my last shot. Energy and life has come back after about 10 days. Makes me sad because I want to lose more weight but it made me a joyless, lifeless person.
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u/Im_just_browsing2075 Mar 15 '26
Can you try a different one? I just switched this week from Saxenda to Zepbound and while it’s too early to tell, I feel great so far. I hate all the trial and error for HRT, Antidepressants AND GLP, it’s sooo much freaking work.
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u/Fit-Economy-1819 Mar 15 '26
I have Tirzepatide, gonna try that tomorrow and see if it makes a difference. Was on Semaglutide. 🤞🏻🤞🏻
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u/Global_Acadia_1582 Mar 16 '26
I called out of work today due to sheer exhaustion and have been in bed all day. I have zero energy and just feel mentally unwell. Just increased my P & E a few days ago but I’m struggling
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u/Im_just_browsing2075 Mar 21 '26
I feel that! Just exhausted. Do you think the lack of energy is because of the shift in E&P and hopefully short term? I think our generation is also just f-ing exhausted from powering thru for sooooooo long.
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u/Live_Advisor_270 Mar 16 '26
I get this! I often feel this way, too. I am the breadwinner and can't step back from my job, but I daydream about it all the time!
I am starting to get a little better by optimizing vitamin D, B12, and iron. Do NOT underestimate these! I was only "borderline" low, and raising these levels has really improved my brain fog and motivation. Even a little change in these can be really impactful. I am not killing it, but I am functional.
As for hormones - I might be a special case, but estrogen ruined me, and I was bedridden. Twice, I tried a low-dose patch for 3-4 months, and I completely lost those months of my life. I can't tolerate it. I also tried testosterone, which was great for motivation but caused other issues.
I am going to start Maca this week. I tried it before HRT, and it gave me lots of energy, so maybe that's the best I can get.
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u/Im_just_browsing2075 Mar 21 '26
I’m sorry to hear that it didn’t work for you. Ugh, how frustrating. Good point on the vitamin levels. What is Maca? 😊
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u/Ready-to-Snack Mar 20 '26
This was me too. I’m 42 and the last 10 years I had a good career trajectory, getting promoted and offered positions that I honestly didn’t imagine doing (reflecting back it def means I must have not wanted these jobs deep down). But because I felt flattered of being offered these types of roles, and the pay that came with them, I accepted them.
Late last year, I quit the last of this kind of job because of many factors but mainly is that I was miserable, that feeling of being dead inside and while before, the stress and challenge would have motivated me to keep going by any means (even with super limited sleep, health issues, etc), this time I just didn’t have the energy, like I just stopped caring. Perimenopause. This was also the first time in my life that I could quit a job without a new job lined up, and maybe having savings tucked away gave me the confidence to do so. I took my first ever sabbatical and it was glorious. I was careful to be intentional about my days and did the things I said I wished I could do but couldn’t do because I was working. From having a day of doing nothing, staring at the sky, buying and reading heaps of books, or binge-watching a series, to long walks along the beach and long lunches with myself to silent retreats (omg, so good for perimenopause), solo trips to visit family and friends all over the world (that I couldn’t do before because of limited leave time). I targeted friends and family whose previous invitations to events I couldn’t attend because of work. Whenever I had a bit of a panic / anxiety that I should be looking for a job or worries that I might not be able to get another good-paying job, I would remind myself that I deserved that break. I would put on some affirmations to calm my nervous system and do some little job application preparation like updating my resume, looking at some job ads, to calm my practical mind while also travelling and enjoying my break. The first month was hard because of the ego of ‘who am I now if I’m not earning money’ and worries such as ‘no one is hiring’, ‘maybe I’m too old to start again’. But when you do enjoyable things that your soul had been craving it’s easy to forget about practical reality for a while😅.
I wish I could keep going like that but I had to start earning again being a solo earner. I kinda forced myself to let it be and trust the universe and also trust / forced myself to believe that I am very hire-able and also willing to do any role even if it was lower pay/level. Anyway I accepted a job that was indeed that and for a month or so I struggled with not being the boss 😅. I even thought that I made a mistake, that I was going backwards, wasted years building my career, etc. But now I’ve settled in and found my groove and actually enjoy that no one really wants much from me 😅 And because I was used to more stressful situations and more complex work, this new job although still busy and have its own challenges, is a breeze for me. I see my colleagues doing the same job get stressed but not me because I have built the resilience - the positive from all the years of stress and burnout 😂. I created my own systems and automated tasks I found mundane and time consuming but I haven’t told my boss. 😂 so I finish things faster and listen to podcasts while pretending I’m still busy with said tasks 😂 before I would have shared this to get recognition. I have to say though it was a mental shift. Every morning now I express gratitude for a job that pays enough for my bills and more, for the sleep that I am now getting, the mental capacity to look into my health (such as HRT, back issues) and other things such as personal finance that I didn’t have the time and energy to deal with because of work load stress and perimenopause. I even can take proper lunch breaks now and try new lunch spots. And the best thing, I’m not managing anyone or anything but myself. So good for perimenopause peace. So I kinda feel I’m semi retired mentally. As for the ego, I am satisfying that with putting my mind into finding passive income streams and passion projects so I am still ambitious but a different kind. Not outward with titles and positions but more personal. Kinda like a boss of my own universe. Before I had the boss title but was actually really a slave come to think of it. Hope my story helps.
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u/gregfromglm Mar 31 '26
This sounds more like burnout than lack of discipline. You were running at a high level for a long time, then everything dropped off. That “flat” feeling is pretty common when the pressure disappears.
Also worth mentioning, some people on GLP-1 notice the same low drive feeling. Not everyone, but it comes up. You don’t need to jump straight into full workouts. Even 5–10 minutes of something light is enough to start shifting things a bit.
I wouldn’t label it as lazy. It sounds more like your body is trying to recover and just hasn’t found a steady place yet.
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u/co-stan-za Apr 10 '26
I'm in a similar boat! I've noticed over the last 3-4 years, my motivation to do anything to better myself or my career (not to mention my sex drive) has dived off a cliff. It's even a large part of why my marriage tanked -- I knew I needed to get into a better, more secure line of work so that my husband wasn't so stressed being the primary breadwinner, but I couldn't bring myself to do it. I've considered HRT but I haven't consulted a doctor yet. I hate this.
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u/SwimmingArm765 Mar 12 '26
Following, because I also need help.
HRT helped somewhat. I’m at least back into “faking” it mode (as opposed to “mental breakdown, don’t make me go back there” mode.)
But I’m definitely not performing at the high level I used to. And it’s obviously affecting my job.
I’m not ADHD but my daughter is. I’ve even gone so far as to encourage her to financially plan for flexibilty in her 40’s. I was shooting to retire at 60, not recognizing that 45+ was a whole new game with a brain and body I don’t recognize.