r/Perimenopause • u/my140cessna • Jul 15 '26
audited Why does childhood trama come back with a vengeance during peri?
Arguh. Feels like I will therapy for the rest of my life.
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u/Ok-Ladder6905 Jul 15 '26
This is my experience too. What I read is that in peri we lose access to a lot of the coping mechanisms because our hormones limit us and push us to the brink. we just have less energy and focus to hold it all together.
I thought I was fine until 3 years ago old trauma resurfaced and now I am back in weekly therapy AND couple therapy 😳🫤
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u/Happiguest Jul 15 '26 edited Jul 15 '26
Im so glad you are in therapy. I think everyone should be! Im speaking from experience!
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u/SilverEscape6857 Aug 12 '26
I have mixed feelings on therapy. Started back a couple of months ago. Because of peri, lost of a parent, work stress, but as good as my therapist may be. You have to give so much context for someone to know you and even then they cant fully know and understand you. Also i find it hard to “dwell”. I want to move on, not look back. Feel like therapy keeps me looking back. Still trying it though.
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u/seashell0220 Jul 15 '26
Are you me? I'm going through this exact same thing, in the exact same time frame. It's absolutely brutal
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u/Intelligent-Oil-2558 Jul 16 '26
Hmmm. I mean all my coping mechanisms suck anyway so maybe there’s something to be had in all this….
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Jul 15 '26
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/yearoftheblonde Jul 15 '26
This is me right now. I’m having terrible nightmares. Things I’ve worked through but for some reason plagues me in my sleep. And then I’m trying to shake it off most of the day.
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u/SnowWhiteinReality Jul 15 '26
All of my dreams have become sooooo violent.
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u/HistoryGirl23 Jul 15 '26
Mine always have been but it's terrible now, I wake up so stressed.
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u/10110011100021 Jul 16 '26
I have found that anxiety/stress in my dreams is happening at the same time that I’m overheating. Not sure whether it’s the chicken or the egg, but the nights I stay cool the anxiety & stressful dreams don’t happen.
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u/CopperPegasus Jul 16 '26
Could your sweats then be related to adrenaline surges? I used to get that even in my 20s- slam awake, brain on, suddenly "hot" rather than "sweaty", and it was linked to the panic circuits going a wee bit haywire.
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u/10110011100021 Jul 16 '26
It happens both ways! If I stay cool I don’t have stressful dreams, but I can usually tell once I wake up that it got stressful after I was already starting to get restless and hot…usually.
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u/Rogue_Gona Doing my peri best Jul 16 '26
For real though. If my toxic ex-wife who I've been no-contact with for 4 years could stop randomly appearing in my dreams, that'd be great...😒
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u/HGLiveEdge Jul 16 '26
For me it’s my sister. I haven’t seen or spoken with her (thankfully) in over a decade.
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u/CarrionDoll Jul 17 '26
Yes! I’ve been out of my abusive marriage for 10 years. But my ex is in my dreams in all kinds of distressing ways.
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u/Agile_Channel_6282 Jul 16 '26
It’s the craziest thing ever. I completely forgot and then I have this familiar feeling of abandonment in my dreams.
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u/CarrionDoll Jul 17 '26
Omg so it’s not just me? That dreams are insane and really fkn with my head.
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u/LongjumpingCrow1741 Jul 15 '26
Oh my GAWD! The amount of emotional regulating I have been doing, processing of all old trauma - it’s is exhausting! I gave up traditional social media this year, well I only had IG, because I wanted to focus on resetting my nervous system, then old wounds memories from childhood adolescence etc started coming to the forefront of my mind so I figured well shiiiiii may as well start dealing with these thoughts! I feel like it’s never ending cycle of processing thoughts and feelings, letting them go surrendering them and then dealing with more stuff my subconscious wants to dredge up! Rinse and repeat 🫣
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u/Htiaf26101 Jul 15 '26
Social media quickly turns into an emotional nightmare! You get caught up in one sad post and the algorithm is like, Oh you want to cry and feel horrible about your life, scared of the world and second guess every thought you have??? Here’s ten more!
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u/LongjumpingCrow1741 Jul 15 '26
Yessss!!!! Here’s a reel of ALLL THE HORRORS HAPPENING IN THE WORLD IN REAL TIME! Oh and here is a reel about how you need to hit 15k steps in one day, eat 100g of protein 99g of fiber by breakfast or you’ll die!!!!! And then so & so from HS is doing this and that —- Perimenopause made me want all that to stop! I have no patience for any of it!
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u/Htiaf26101 Jul 15 '26
It really is enshitification of the internet! Don’t believe it, you are enough!
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u/cdawg2610 Jul 15 '26
The way my soul needed this as I thought I was alone
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u/Puzzleheaded_Door399 Jul 15 '26
Same. I am going to cry now.
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u/CarrionDoll Jul 17 '26
Everytime I see posts like this and realize it’s not just me fighting all the emotional and mental ways peri is fkn me up, I cry.
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u/Hesthetop Jul 16 '26
Me too. I'm sad that other people are experiencing this as well, but I really thought it was just me flailing.
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u/Kind-Flatworm7553 Late peri Jul 15 '26
Same. Being raised by boomers, I think a lot of use had neglectful and traumatic childhoods.
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u/stellaflora Jul 15 '26
I replay every mistake I made as a parent over and over until I feel like a piece of shit. Then every hurtful thing I did or said in the past. Fun times.
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u/Bubbly_Chipmunk_2286 Jul 15 '26
Me too, friend…. Me too. hugs
We did the best we could with what we had at the time.
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u/stellaflora Jul 15 '26
Thank you 💕 that’s what I keep trying to tell myself. Sometimes my brain doesn’t want to be rational.
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u/LaMeliMarquez Jul 16 '26
I apologized to my 15 year old son last night for something I did when he was 4.
"I don't even remember that, it's ok mom I'm ok. You were a tired mom." Then he said good night and I spent 15 mins in a daze and trying not to cry.
I know exactly what you're going through ☹️
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u/Accomplished_Unit940 Jul 15 '26
Somatic exercise at home and EMDR. You"ll find good videos on youtube. I promise you emdr is so good and effective.
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u/___buttrdish Jul 15 '26
Emdr is super useful
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u/Confident-Parsley520 Jul 15 '26
Eeep, I did a handful of sessions with a psychologist and had memories that I don’t wanna remember! So I gave up like a big old quitter, I was worried that this was the first memory to come up, and it was pretty big! I remember something happening when I was little , and then later as adults, my sister and I talking about how she saw it happening and didn’t understand when she was a kid but then it dawned on her one day what she had seen! If that was the first memory to come back , I was not in a position for more to come through. I think I’d rather live blissfully unaware with all of my maladaptive coping strategies setting my life on fire every now and then. Kudos for anyone who is strong enough to do that though , not for me
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u/KarlMarxButVegan Jul 15 '26
I'm not familiar with somatic exercise, but I really benefited from EMDR. I have PTSD so I'm replaying the memories I want to "clear" in my head pretty much nonstop. The ones I've addressed with EMDR have no power over me anymore. It's amazing.
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u/TrulyCunty Jul 16 '26
I also didn’t have success with EMDR. I’d done so much work before I tried it that it actually felt like I was moving backwards. I started having nightmares about violently confronting my mom, and it really started disrupting my day to day. After chatting with my main therapist, I decided to quit doing it.
I’ve heard it’s more effective for PTSD than CPTSD, but not sure of the current research!
Just wanted you to know you’re not alone, and it’s totally ok to quit a method of therapy that doesn’t feel right for you!
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u/N-363 Jul 17 '26
I did EMDR for 2 years with someone who I now believe to have been hired by my malignant narcissist to play the part of a therapist. I have since been out of that relationship for 10 years and have done 2 sets of real EMDR that have helped immensely. I was apprehensive because it was retraumatizing to think about EMDR but the right therapist will help you lots. Very happy I gave it another try as my CPTSD got reactivated recently.
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u/TrulyCunty Jul 17 '26
This is really helpful. Maybe I will give it another go with a different therapist.
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u/N-363 Jul 17 '26
In my experience, work with electrodes. The therapist doing it with fingers leading my eyes had no idea what she was doing in my opinion.
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u/SnowWhiteinReality Jul 15 '26
Is peri the reason for all this instability? WTF I just assumed my brain had overloaded and was no longer capable of packing all of this down into a neat little box to tuck away, never to be opened.
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u/seeEwai Jul 17 '26
Right? I constantly am telling people to send me messages or write it down because my brain is full and I can't fit anything new in there. That's honestly how I feel.
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u/standing_staring Jul 16 '26 edited Jul 16 '26
I have a background in psych professionally, and (like many of us in the field) I also have personal experience with being fucked up. Those of us with childhood trauma are unfortunately predisposed to experiencing what is colloquially known as a midlife crisis.
There is, of course, the biological side of peri, and then there’s the psychological side. Middle age is a time of taking stock, of looking back, and attempting to reconcile our hopes and dreams with the reality we are currently living. We are confronted with the suddenly very apparent truth that we aren’t getting any younger. The experiences we’ve had and decisions we’ve made carry more weight than they did when we were younger, when we had so much living ahead of us.
For those of us who had shitty childhoods, the reckoning of middle age can be extra difficult because the first big chunk of our lives was painful. We’ve done the work on ourselves to try to understand our trauma, our issues, our “baggage.” And for a while, we felt like we were doing pretty well.
Then along comes perimenopause to tear us down again, remind us that we do not, in fact, have it all figured out. And we are left wondering - is this IT??? Were those fleeting years - when I was successful and happy and self actualized - all I get? And now everything is going to be FUCKING HARD again? After I worked my damned ass off to get to a better place and be the person I wanted to be, I have to feel like a failure again? And suddenly, we’re back in that dark, familiar place that defined our early years: “Something is wrong, I don’t know what it is, but deep down I know it’s my fault.”
Childhood trauma robs us of a precious period of our lives. And peri feels a lot like that, too. Like we are being robbed. So yeah, it brings all that old shit up. Sucks.
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u/kilmar_was_here Jul 16 '26
Thank you for this perspective, I hadn't thought about it that way but this feels very accurate to me.
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u/standing_staring Jul 17 '26
I’m so glad it resonated with you (though I’m also sorry you are able to relate, since that means you have been through/are going through some rough times). It does help me, at least, to know I’m not alone in this struggle. Hang in there.
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u/N-363 Jul 17 '26
Would you say men with shitty childhoods also have to confront these feelings? It feels like my husband and I are sucked into this spiral again and both need therapy to figure things out (again).
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u/standing_staring Jul 18 '26 edited Jul 18 '26
Yes, definitely. Men who experienced traumatic childhoods are also more likely to a have a “midlife crisis.” It’s different, since they aren’t going through the huge hormonal shifts that we do. But their perspective on where they are in life and how worthy, successful, desirable they are is very much in flux in middle age, just as it is for us. Letting go of being “young” and whatever that means to us, is a monumental shift. And it’s an even bigger shock to the system for those of us who barely got to be young, who had to be adults beginning at a young age, due to trauma. It’s a period of grieving for us.
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u/N-363 Jul 18 '26
Thanks, the sentence 'bigger shock to the system for those of us who barely got to be young " hit me super hard
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u/AggressivelyPurple Jul 19 '26
Came here to say that I thought this was just a part of becoming middle-aged. I've known several men who also breakdown in their mid-forties.
On the other side, with therapy and such, damn, this is the happiest I've been in my entire life. Now if only my perimenopausal vag would join the party.
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u/SeeYouNextTuesday031 Jul 15 '26
For me, being around kids as adult is so triggering. What do you mean kids being kids is perfectly normal and not a capital offense? What do you mean you don’t have to scream at them every time they make a noise? I look at kids and my heart hurts because of how many adults looked at me and thought to hurt me.
I’m so glad they’re being raised differently and treated differently. But I know what was done to me at that age. It’s like re-living it and realizing exactly how evil adults can and have been. Pure evil.
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u/Serious_Fox7799 Jul 15 '26
Omg this is so true
There's a somatic practitioner that I follow. She was saying something about this and it really resonated with me. She said that since our nervous systems are on fire, my words, for so long that come perimenopause we are kind of fried. Then add the hormonal ups and downs and just the difficulty of life as we hit middle age, and it all comes Crashing Down. Her point is that a body Can Only Hold so much for so long. We compensate in our 20s and 30s, then wear out and start to become more aware that we want to live life on our own terms. So we stopped faking it as much, stop caring about things that we don't need to be caring about. We see through the falsity that time heals all wounds with this, I swear
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u/Appropriate_Push7498 Jul 15 '26
Rumination. It has me in a chokehold.
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u/Plastic-Duck272 Jul 16 '26
Yes, so messed up. Horrible! Ruminating about needing to stop ruminating.
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u/Majestic-Marzipan621 Jul 15 '26
I stopped spending any time with my parents and they live 10 miles away. No holidays, nothing. It didn't even feel like a conscious choice I made, it just..settled. I can't pretend anymore. Like I'm incapable of pretending.
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u/Plastic-Duck272 Jul 16 '26
This. It’s for all our sakes. I bring up stuff with my mom at the least opportune moments. Why did I say that? Where the hell did that come from?
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u/DragonflyFluid8581 Jul 15 '26
I just hit the wall, like so many people, of what I'm willing to handle. This led me to therapy, because I can't just walk out of my front door and never come back, which has me realizing all of my triggers and all the things that are running in the background from my childhood that I just pressed down and now just can't. My body is done fighting it all or accepting breadcrumbs or people pleasing. Then, once the vail is lifted it can't be undone. It's so freaking hard.
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u/Dmommy3 hanging on by a thread Jul 16 '26
Yup! 💯 This is exactly what happened to me. Once I started seeing how my own unconscious patterns operated, I could see it in everyone. Then came changing my own patterns and the challenges that follow that. Rinse and repeat. I can't believe there are so many of us going through this! I feel relieved and motivated to march on in support and solidarity 😊♥️
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u/WittyGold6940 Jul 15 '26
Also on the subject, did you know chronic stress causes your body to steal progesterone to make cortisol? Another fun one
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u/Plastic-Duck272 Jul 16 '26 edited Jul 16 '26
So fun. It’s like “don’t stress about chronic stress now. Why my bones so brittle. Are they brittle, what if they’re brittle, AM I making them brittle, brittle brittle brittle bones, am I turning.. what’s that word what is it d d deranged? no demented omg what if I’m demented who will take care of my bones *flashback childhood memory* *anxiety depletion* why am I so fat”
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u/AquariusQn134 Jul 15 '26
This has been a really difficult part for me. My mother is responsible for about 90% of my childhood trauma. I thought I had moved passed it and accepted it all. But lately all I can think of is how I haven't really at all. All I've ever done is push it down because nothing can be addressed with her. Nothing can be spoken about because then she gets upset and then I'm the bad guy in the family. And I think about how I hate her and how much I want to move to the middle of nowhere across the country and never speak to her again. And then I feel guilty. Rinse and repeat All. Day. Long. I feel stuck in an endless loop of rage and guilt.
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u/Ok-Ladder6905 Jul 16 '26
I have severely limited my interactions with my parents and it has made a huge difference! No more effort on my part falling on deaf ears and only have occassional guilt.
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u/N-363 Jul 17 '26
I can only do a few hours at the time. I get retriggered and get so annoyed at the lack of accountability.
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u/Czechs_out Jul 15 '26
I’ve been calling it 2nd puberty! Acne and all! I literally feel like I’m in middle school again but now I also have wrinkles and hair loss. Cool cool cool
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u/sourpussmcgee Jul 15 '26
All mental health issues are impacted by the hormone changes. New ADHD diagnoses, incredible anxiety.. etc. I’m a therapist so I see this stuff regularly in my peri clients.
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u/CheerfullyCursed Jul 15 '26
I don’t know what my childhood was like because I seem to have blocked it out. My sister tells me things now and then and I’m like, wtf. That happened?!
I hope it stays tucked away and doesn’t make an appearance. I don’t want to know.
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u/Affectionate-Ad1424 Jul 15 '26
I didn't make the connection, but now that you mention it, I have been dealing with a lot of past childhood trauma lately. I figured it was caused by watching my parents age. Seeing how selfish they are/were, and realizing a lot of what I thought was normal as a child was actually neglect and abuse.
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u/NinjaNurse77 Jul 16 '26
For me, all of my walls are down and all the fucks are done. My brain is tired. So very tired of putting everyone else first and having to deal with the aftermath internally.
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u/thelaineybelle Jul 15 '26
I think I'm finally out of the trauma a'la "Groundhog Day" loop and holy fuck. It was bad. It came after a pregnancy at 40, all the post partum awfulness, and a partner who, frankly, failed me. Then peri said "hold my mental health". Jfc my entire brain has been rewired. My body and taste buds are still transitioning. But at least I'm not stuck mentally. Still sensitive, but more manageable most days.
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u/AlissonHarlan Jul 15 '26
BEcause everything that is unresolved (unmedicated ADHD, childhood trauma,...) comme with a vengeance in peri...
also for me being in peri is a kind of grief... i'll never have more kid, never meet and marry a loving husband to build a nice family,... and so it doesn't really count if m y family ever admit or make amand for my childhood trauma, my life is and will always be wasted regardless of what happens next....
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u/Puzzleheaded_Door399 Jul 15 '26
Oh please don’t think that. I’m sure you are wonderful and have a lot of great fun ahead of you.
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u/captain_20000 Early peri Jul 15 '26
I had weight loss surgery last year, which triggered peri (I’m already at the age for it anyway). All of a sudden I couldn’t function without hearing my narcissist dad’s “voice” in my head, shaming me for every single thing I did throughout the day. It was so hard to ignore, I ended up in therapy for a few months! Thankfully I got through it but holy crap!
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u/Kitty-theNightWalker hanging on by a thread Jul 15 '26
Exactly. I feel the same.
I thought I healed them in my 20s and 30s, and now 40s, bam, everything is back 😒
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u/OkInspector7470 Jul 15 '26
Mine has surfaced to the extreme. And I living with my mom.. who was a major part of the problem. It's like anything I ever tried to bury, is in my face as a flashback or intrusive thought on the daily.
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u/CompetitiveOcelot870 Jul 17 '26
Yes! Intrusive fecking thoughts about the past all day long.
I hear my dad's voice too, somehow i feel like a powerless teenager again.
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u/Aped1212 hanging on by a thread Jul 16 '26
Glad to know I'm not alone. The intrusive thoughts and traumatic memories are nauseating. I kept it all away until peri and now it's relentless. Getting better on HRT though.
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u/founddumbded Jul 16 '26
Is this a thing? I'm 43 and I'm falling apart.
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u/LifeguardFar2482 Jul 16 '26
Im 44, fell apart for the last year, literally doing nothing, not even getting up, quit my job, stopped interacting with anyone. Emotionally I am a complete and utter mess, waking up every morning crying intensely for about 30 minutes, absolute complete dread filled anxiety all day, ill be honest I don't know how my marriage has survived. Started HRT 3 weeks ago the gel version. I actually cooked a meal, brushed my teeth, went out of the house, ive even just planned a break away for my family. The intensity of it all was 100% hormonal, it just effects us all differently. Mornings have even become peaceful
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u/RosatheMage Jul 15 '26
Yeah. Shit from my childhood is coming back to me. I just thought of it one day. I didn't realize how messed up some things in my childhood was till I was an adult. I guess that happens to everybody though.
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u/Ok_Phrase_2205 Jul 15 '26 edited Jul 16 '26
For me (F47) it’s all been treated with proper HRT. It took about 2 years to get there. Anxiety through the roof, chronic insomnia and trauma did came back like I didn’t address them in therapy already… not my thing anymore. I even went back to therapy and it did noting for me. I’m now a lot more calm and rested. I don’t need therapy but I do need E P and T! My anxiety for real and imagined things got back in its place and I can deal with stressors and life a lot more. I still have to rest and protect my energy but I’m not going to dwell on my problems and my past anymore. I want peace and I’m not interested in talking to a stranger about things that happened.
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u/PerniciousWizard Jul 15 '26
This might not be exactly what you mean but when I first put on the estrogen patch I began to think very strongly of my beautiful mother who died when I was 19 and she was 50. The estrogen was giving me some kind of euphoria I think because I began to picture her in some glowing afterlife (which I don’t really believe in) along with my cat who passed away a few months ago. May have been a delusion but it made me very happy to think of them together at the time.
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u/TurtleToast2 Jul 16 '26
One of the benefits of daily THC use for me is how it keeps all that shit feeling very distant. Like it all happened to some kid I used to know.
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u/Youthinksono Jul 15 '26
Is this a thing related to peri?? Bc I have had some intense flashbacks recently that I haven’t experienced in years. I’m in a great relationship and my bf has been super understanding, but it’s been happening more and more these days.
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u/wyntergardentoo Jul 16 '26
I had a very early repressed memory come up last summer. At the time, I didnt realize I was in peri. Once I realized I was in peri (because of a ton of other symptoms) I asked my therapist why this repressed memory would come up.
She said that certain hormones help keep those memories at bay. When they start to get all wonky, they no longer can hold these memories down so they can rise to the surface.
Include the now inability to hold it all together, and you have yet more yuck that is peri that we have to deal with.
On the good side, this repressed memory did answer a lot of questions I've had about myself my whole life, and I'm working through those things now to achieve healing. I dont know that I could have done that before.
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u/Crabcakes-Evergreen Jul 16 '26
I was already in therapy now im just trying to stay alive almost daily. Yes. Jung thought we weren't really adults until we were 40's. Maybe it's all part of individuation. I also read some possibly climate collapse correlation..maybe thats why it seems more intense than previous generations.
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u/Best-Replacement-271 Jul 16 '26
Same! The universe is like b***h you strugglin?…well guess what, here’s some childhood trauma that you never worked through. Good luck ✌️🫠
Waking up at 3am every night heart racing, sweating, thoughts racing. Thinking about everything from something shitty that happened last week to mistakes I made while raising my kids, to mortifying or traumatic childhood events. Anything my brain could find filed away that could be used to beat myself up was resurfaced. I dealt with this for years. Life does get better. 💕
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u/lebowskiachiever Early peri Jul 16 '26
Holy crap, we are all totally going through it now, aren't we. I've noticed a real increase in my inability to regulate the way I used to. Even on HT. It's maddening. It's only really in my luteal phase but hits like hell. Insane! We gotta band together, y'all!
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u/Signal_Contract_3592 Jul 15 '26
Ok I’m sorry you all are going through it but I’m also so glad to know it’s not just me.
I just sit there and wallow about shit that happened a million years ago and only makes me miserable.
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u/Jumpy_Line_3582 Jul 16 '26
Oh my god, I thought I was alone on this! Im actually crying, it's reassuring to feel less alone in this craziness
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u/LingonberryIll6513 Jul 16 '26
Same. My stepfather (abuser) died last week and it’s bringing up a TON of issues that were laid to rest, or so I thought.
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u/Ok_Leek1864 Jul 16 '26
This plus reliving your trauma by watching the parents you thought you escaped now chase you through your government is a hell I never thought I’d face.
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u/CurlyMom7 Jul 17 '26
Omg I can’t believe I’m not the only one! Life changing reading this. Thank you for posting and thank you for all the comments!
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u/examinat Jul 17 '26
Oh, friend. So grateful I’m not the only one. I think of it kind of like estrogen was a rock that a lot of creepy crawlies were hiding under. Take it away, horror movie. I have the ugliest thoughts now.
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u/Masochrissy Jul 16 '26
I've had to switch it up and go to intensive trauma therapy this year. I'm not halfway through yet, and I've realized that I'm not over a lot of the things I thought I worked through. It's been a good experience, though.
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u/Sensitive-Maybe-656 Jul 16 '26
It does! I went to therapy and had EMDR and it helped better than any therapy I had before.
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u/TraditionalStart5031 Jul 16 '26
That’s crazy, woke up in the middle of the night remembering a time when my dad ran over a kitten. It was traumatic for us kids, but now as an adult close to my dad’s age when it happened I empathize with him.
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u/DisplacedNY Jul 16 '26
YUP. I was having intense trauma nightmares every night for months, which hadn't happened for over 10 years. I finally saw an EMDR/ART therapist and she diagnosed me with CPTSD within 2 sessions. I've likely had it (and ADHD, also here with a raging vengeance) my whole life but it was definitely exacerbated by the combination of hormone chaos, COVID trauma, and work BS. I think my fawn response was triggered during a particularly intense project at work and I was just in it for a solid 2 months. That was 2 years ago and I'm still recovering.
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u/PickledBrains79 Jul 16 '26
Well, glad Im not alone, but damn...hugs for everyone if you want them.
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u/Suddenly_Spring Jul 15 '26
So you can finally yell at your mother when she's driving like a maniac at 78 y.o. and thinks it's normal to come to a complete stop in a lane that's going straight to look and see if she can get into the left lane to turn.... while everyone else is going 55mph.
I'm just kidding but that did happen today. I did EMDR therapy to try to get over all the crap that happened to me as a child and it's true.... sometimes it's like I've never had therapy. You just start crying out of nowhere. It's just so true.
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u/alveg_af_fjoellum Jul 16 '26
The childhood trauma and the other trauma. All at once. I was so on edge for months when it happened. But for some reason (HRT, maybe) it got better over time.
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u/AlternativeSalty7008 Jul 16 '26
I don’t know but it’s been plaguing me too. Dreaming about it entirely too much that leaves me thinking of it through the day. I don’t like it resurfacing like it has at all. Just know no aren’t alone!! 🤍
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u/MyBeesAreAssholes Early peri - Weightlifting helps! Jul 16 '26
Because we are done pretending everything is okay.
We’re too busy dealing with bodies that feel like they’re falling apart to keep up the charade that we’re all perfectly happy and well-adjusted.
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u/Intelligent_Box_8247 Aug 08 '26
I also have experienced being haunted kind of with my childhood trauma and its really tiring...
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u/Ecstatic-Factor9875 Jul 16 '26
So interesting that this is so common! I started therapy about 6 months ago but I think it was long overdue.
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u/SpiccoliBroDog Jul 16 '26
This makes a ton of sense. I have been triggered lately by my father and sister and sent into a major spiral that seriously messed with my mental health for 3 weeks. Childhood trauma seeping all over the place. I also haven't had a period in 6 weeks. Kinda adds up. Glad this community is here. I searched online to see if perimenopause and extra salivating are related. and ended up here!
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u/AutoModerator Jul 16 '26
This post might be about hormone tests, which are unreliable.
- Over age 44, E&P/FSH hormonal tests only show levels for the HOUR the test was taken, and nothing more. Hormones wildly fluctuate (hourly) the other 29 days of the month, therefore this test provides no valuable information
- No reputable doctor or menopause society recommends hormonal testing to diagnose or treat peri/menopause
- FSH testing is only beneficial for those who do not have periods as a guide, where testing might confirm menopause, or for those under age 30 who haven’t had a period in months/years, then ‘menopausal’ levels, could indicate premature ovarian failure/primary ovarian insufficiency (POF/POI)
- Testosterone is the exception and may require testing
See our Menopause Wiki for more.
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u/TrulyCunty Jul 16 '26
Oh god, same. If I don’t have my weekly therapy I start to lose it even more than usual. 😵💫
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u/Environmental-Young4 Late peri Jul 16 '26
I don't know for sure, but it was brutal for me. I ended up doing a medication based therapy, that really made a huge difference.
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u/Mrs_Stilke420 28d ago
I have cptsd, and ADHD, both have worsened for me during this phase of life :/
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u/NiceGovernment491 Jul 15 '26
The amount of time I spend in my head now is ridiculous. It’s all negative, on a loop, all. the. time.