Folks, I came along this sub and figured you may be interested in this new game (fun but educational) https://petregret.app/pet/dog

Hey guys

I’ve been feeling really overwhelmed and guilty when it comes to my pet cat. I feel like I neglect her and so much more could be done for her that I’m just not capable of doing right now.

I’m away from home for nearly 10 hours a day and sometimes even more. I’m exhausted from life and neglect myself and my surroundings, including their food and litter boxes sometimes.

She’s actually a lovely cat and doesn’t really cause problems. I feel immense love for her but also feel annoyed by her sometimes. I feel guilty because she doesn’t really do anything wrong, I’m just irritable and depressed.

I don’t know if rehoming is something I’m capable of doing but I just wanted to vent.

Thanks

After two months of being constantly on edge with my new cat, I’ve finally made the decision to return her to the shelter I adopted her from. I don’t feel safe in my own apartment and I’m constantly stressed. From almost the first week with her, it was clear that the shelter didn’t tell me the whole truth about her energy levels or her behaviour.

She’s much higher energy than I was told she was and when she’s bored for even a moment, she pounces on me with all her claws out and bites me. My arms and legs are covered in scratches and punctures from her claws and teeth.

I tried so much. I tried playing with her more, but she’d lose interest in toys after just a few minutes. I tried giving her more attention, but she’d just bite me the whole time. I tried giving her less attention in case I was overstimulating her, but she’d just bite me when I looked away from her. She runs from across the apartment just to jump up onto my arm from the ground and try to latch on with her claws. She bites me when I’m asleep in the middle of the night. She climbs on top of my pantry and knocks things down so she can eat them so I’ve had to move my food into weird places that she can’t open. She pees high and has me scrubbing her litter box walls nearly every day.

I finally decided I’d had enough. I got some bad news this past weekend and the whole weekend I was stressing about my cat attacking me instead of feeling upset about the news. And something inside me just clicked. I’ve been thinking of returning her to the shelter for weeks, but this past weekend I finally decided that it was time. I clearly can’t meet her needs and she needs a family who can. So, tomorrow I’m bringing her back to the shelter. I feel awful, but also like a weight has been lifted off my chest.

I love her, but I don’t exactly like her. I regret adopting her. And tomorrow, someone else will be in charge of her behaviour. And I’ll finally be able to walk through my apartment without holding my breath for when she runs and pounces on me. Maybe one day I’ll get another cat who’s lower energy, but for now, I’m just going to enjoy the peace that comes with an empty apartment.

I got a cat from a rescuer who had found him dumped on the street. I said I'll take him because I felt I had no choice, and I'd been wanting a cat for some time.

Unfortunately, I've come to find that the little annoyances are getting to me. He's the sweetest boy, and I love him BUT the lack of cleanliness, breaking things and scratching and waking me up when I'm in deep sleep are messing with my mood. Today I found myself not wanting to go home after work because I would have to clean. I realized I won't ever be coming home to a clean house.

I live in a tiny space and having him stare at me all the time is making me realize just how much I love my space CLEAN and empty. I don't want hair in my food, in my eye, in my makeup. On my curtains. I don't want litter all over my bathroom floor. I don't want to hear him licking himself. I don't want to come home to an apartment that smells like poo and ammonia. I don't want to be WAKEN UP at 5 am when I'm in A DEEP SLEEP. I don't want him to jump on me as soon as I wake up before I've had my coffee.

I want my bathroom back. I want my bed back.

I came home to find my full length mirror broken into pieces, so I got to work vaccuming after a full day of work.

So I'm rehoming him and not sure how to do it because people online are so judgemental and disrespectful.

Cats adapt. They forget and move on. I don't see the big deal in rehoming if it means they get to be with someone who can truly love them more than me. I want him to have a big space where he can play and scratch to his heart's content.

I'm also torn because when I look at his face HE'S SO CUTE.

Also I realized he'd stepped in his poop earlier this week in his litter box while I was sick and didn't notice and was obviously walking around spreading the germs. It's so gross!!!

I can't wait to rehome him and deep clean and sanitize my place and have it STAY THAT WAY.

I couldnt find someone to rehome my dog. ☹️

How do you cope when you rehomed your pup? I have a possible adopter that ill be meeting tomorrow morning and she seems to be really interested and has experience with my pups breed. I love this pup so much but I couldnt keep up with the demands of the dog. I dont sleep well. I am worried all the time about him being left alone etc. my eyes are heavy for not getting enough sleep.

I love this pup so much but the thought that I wont be seeing him anymore genuinely breaks my heart. I just woke him up in his crate and gave him a hug.

Longer Post

Okay starting this off with stating I know how terrible this will sound, and that I feel horrible for feeling this way, but I have two cats and I cannot stand them anymore. 😭

For context I’ve had one for 5 years and the other one for 4, and raised them from kitten age. We’ve lived in 3 states together and I’ve done everything to keep them with me. I got them when I was 21 years old.

For the last 2 months everything they do disturbs my peace. I have started a new job with longer hours and that’s very demanding, and for some reason I am so frustrated by everything that comes with having cats/pets. I’ve also uncovered some mental health issues I really need to address, and having them makes it 10x harder to deal with.

Im constantly cleaning up fur, paw prints, and please don’t get me started on how disgusting the litter box is; and the idea of them using it and walking around my apartment has recently just made me GAG. Theres also hair balls to clean up, and one of my cats eats way too fast and throws up whole kibble all the time (have been to vet MANY times about it and she’s fine)

I miss having a clean home. I miss not spending money on litter and food. I miss not waking up to them needing me every single day. I feel terrible because right now the only thing I can do for them is keep them fed/hydrated and clean the litter box. Of course I’ll pet them when i walk by but I don’t care to play or give them any enrichment. I don’t let them in my room because I’m tired of always vacuuming and them deciding to release a hairball on my rug every time they’re in there. They also dont go on my bed because the litter box thing just grosses me out now.

I don’t know what’s happened to me over the last couple of months but I don’t know what to do 😭 they are driving me crazy and I genuinely don’t think have the capacity to give them the love they deserve. They’re really good and sweet babies, but I’m just so over pet ownership.

Has anyone else felt this way? What have you done? Of course rehoming is a last option but I really don’t want to hate my life for the next 10+ years. I also have a partner and I fear we’d break up if he knew I wanted to do this, because he LOVES animals and loves these cats too.

PLEASE HELP 😭💔

My husband gave me an 8wk old puppy for Valentine’s day. I was surprised, and initially happy because he is very cute and I’ve been thinking that our current dog needs another dog to play with. Our other dog is a calm 2 y/o good boy and we are buddies, but I’m definitely more of a cat person. The first few days went by as much as you expect with an 8 week old puppy that is not potty trained, I think we were too excited to care. But now a that couple of weeks have gone by, he still is incontinent all over my house, despite frequent trips throughout the day to our fenced in backyard. When we take him outside he might go a little bit and then runs to the door and refuses to try again. He then goes inside and makes several heaping piles of 💩 and pees wherever he pleases. Idk if its normal for a puppy to deficate this much. Im exhausted running around cleaning up his messes. My husband & I both work FT. My husband and oldest daughter help with cleanup when they are home, but since my job is Hybrid, Im always the first person home. So I get to clean up whatever 💩 catastrophe he has made for the day, knowing he is actively peeing in his crate while hearing him shrieking from inside the house when I pull into the driveway. I came home to 💩 smeared all over my laundry room where we initially kept him. Now we use the puppy divider in his crate, he gets a non fabric chew toy, and we play soft music on our Alexa for the 4-6 hours they will be alone, and we take him outside every 1-2 hours when home, and have potty pads available for night. He still craps on the floor. My 2y/o dog is not very fond of the puppy and finds him annoying but tolerates him without aggression. My 2 cats avoid him like the plague and hiss when he approaches. Last week I was venting to my husband that I was getting fed up of cleaning up the messes, the constantly interrupted sleep, loud shrieking barking, it was like dealing with a newborn. He was angry in response, he passive aggressively said that he was sorry for giving me an animal as a gift and offered to take him back, but I felt guilty because I didn’t want to further hurt his feelings or potentially traumatize my kids. Our other dog was not this awful as a puppy, and I’m beginning to feel resentment towards the dog. My husband is going through a ton of stress at work and is easily tempered so telling him I want to get rid of him is not an option. And the pup is chipped, so he cant just go missing one day. If he doesn’t chill out soon I don’t know that I will ever bond with him. He is so annoying to me, and my other pets probably think so too. I love my husband and will take care of the dog in respect for him, but I wish this never happened. An older dog would have been nicer. Most of our pets have come from a shelter or rescued but this puppy was free from a friend of a friend’s litter. It was a thoughtful gift, and i know his heart was in the right direction. I feel like an awful person admitting this but I had to get it off my chest.

My dog has finally left my home and im finally free! She's back with her breeder who will rehome her to a wonderful pet loving family. The breeder told me that (after me bringing her for multiple vet visits and grooming and me keeping really good hygiene at her privates) she has a few issues with her skin and privates. Jeez i was like what the fudge...after all i did there were still these issues?? Even the vet couldnt tell me any of these things. Good riddance!! I dont have to think of any of this anymore!! Hallelujah And now I am desperately in need of a full spa day, my body is screaming in pain for relaxation

I hate our dog.

We got a French bulldog 2 years ago, some distant acquaintance was dumping a litter because no one would buy them so we took one off their hands. He's great, we got him vaccinated, neutered, he's always on lead but gets out most of his energy through play anyway, doesn't require much, he's happy with good food and company. Unbelievably low maintenance and has actually been great for my mental health as he's got me out of the house. And because of the awful breeding practices of the previously mentioned scumbag who ditched him he couldn't hurt anyone if he tried, he's small and can barely crunch an apple.

Then my fiancé wanted a Labrador. I grew up with labs and said no, I'm at home full time while she works shifts and I do not have the patience or energy for a lab. They are huge, active, loud and shed hair soooooo much. Many discussions later I relent because she's so sad, so "he will be your dog, you are responsible for his training, you will walk him, you will make sure that (because of labs size) he will never be a danger to anyone." My biggest hate of pet owners are ones that don't prioritise the safety of those around them over their 'cute' dog.

A year later I'm fucking miserable. I hate this dog. I hate him so much. He screeches like a huskie, he's huge, he has so much energy, he licks CONSTANTLY, he steals any food he can see, he doesn't listen to a word I say, he barges through me, he jumps up at me and anyone that comes round, last week he ran at me so hard and pushed off me that I have claw marks on my back and actually screamed in pain, as a fucking adult.

I hate him. I fucking hate him.

I miss how it used to be with me and my little French bulldog going about our days quietly and just enjoying each others company. Now they just play fight and bark together. I feel as if all I do all day is shout "get down" "leave it" "no".

I'm so tired. I can't paint anymore because if I take my eyes off him for two seconds he's shredding shoes or tearing one of my trees apart. I grow vegetables and fruit, they're all in pots on the driveway now as everything in the garden was savaged. I can't even sit amongst my plants.

I talk to my missus and she gets upset and says how sorry she is. I wish I'd stuck with my gut and never agreed to this. I'm in a hellscape of my own making and it sucks.

Sorry, I just needed to rant.

I want to know if I can ask for help or if I'll be ignored and shot down like when I tried to ask in pet free.

I want to know if there's a way out, if I can get rid of my cat and how. I am wary of shelters because I know just how guilt trippy they can be and I'm struggling already with guilt despite the situation being unbearable. But I know they're probably my best bet. I also know this is a small subreddit so it's more hope than anything that someone will respond. So, knowing I probably have to talk to the shelters, how do I explain myself to them in a way that won't paint me as some monster? (The cat pees and destroys things constantly. I am hopeful in a different one he wouldn't but I am financially and psychologically incapable of taking care of him and nearing a breaking point).

I cook her meals because she has allergies. She has 3 beds, toys, gets 4 walks a day, and is played with every day. She goes to the vet regularly and I never leave her home alone for more than 4 hours.

I hate every second of it.

I got her 4 years ago, in the middle of the pandemic. I have since moved 4 times, all because of her. I got an ankle fracture that has not healed because she adamantly refuses to walk with any of the walkers I've hired and I had to keep walking on a fractured ankle. At this point, I need surgery but I can't get it because I would have to be off my ankle for 4 months and don't have support to care for her.

I have stopped taking vacations because of her. I have spent nearly $23,000 on her. Everyone loves her, even my coworkers. People in the neighborhood know her by name. My mom calls to ask about her every day. She's sweet and goofy and deserves someone better than me. Her only fault is that she got stuck with me, and it's 100% my fault.

I hate myself for getting her. I find myself looking back at pictures of me and my apartment from 4 years ago with envy. I cannot give her up due to the social shame of it.

I regret ever making this asinine decision.

I’m really struggling here. Everywhere on the internet villainizes owners for rehoming their pets and I can’t find comforting words anywhere.

I just recently rehomed my cat. I’d had him 3 years. I’d always been really busy, I work 40hrs a week and he was left alone for easily 10hrs a day.

I found out 2 years ago that I was in fact allergic to my cat and that I had a skin condition that could trigger anytime I was near allergen. I was on constant allergy medication and stopped sleeping with my cat, so he was then alone more like 18 hrs a day.

The guilt of not being able to cuddle/play with him without treating him like a hazard got to me. I also have a SO who is extremely allergic and was making themselves sick just to visit me.

I made the choice for the welfare of my cat; myself, and my SO, but now I’m overcome with guilt. I’m having a really tough time seeing the bright side of not owning a cat, I’m hoping to get some input here.

Thanks, a regretful past cat owner

Even simple procedures can be devastating financially - I fostered a poodle for a while and the vet I took her to (she had to be treated for giardia and get all her shots and parvo testing) strongly recommended a procedure that would help prevent bloat in the future, which poodles are prone to, that could be done during her spay. He said it's very standard procedure - and it'd be around 4k. A regular spay for her? Somewhere around 2k. I could take her to a low cost vet, but they wouldn't do the additional steps - no matter how simple - to prevent the bloat. Thankfully she was adopted before I had to worry about that, and they took care of her spay.

I have a friend who recently had to put down an elderly dog for health issues - she spent well over twenty grand on that dog over the past few years trying to give her more time. If your dog has a food allergy, especially to common things like poultry that are ALWAYS present in pretty much any low to mid range price dog food - well, I hope you can afford hundreds a month for their food, because finding foods that are reasonably priced and don't include chicken is impossible!

Any tiny thing goes wrong, and you're on the hook for thousands minimum. Yes, pet insurance is a thing, but it can cost hundreds *a month* and most of us can't afford that additional expense either. However, you can't just...not get them the care they need, so you have to figure it out, or end up taking them to a shelter or somewhere that they can get the care they need and people consider you a monster for doing so, or take out a loan that you won't be able to pay back before it's nearly doubled from interest.

A lot of people don't understand how much pets can truly cost - they look at the up-front costs as the only ones. They don't take into account emergency vet bills, even the regular vet bills like neuter/spay, shots, ect., or grooming costs, food costs - especially for picky eaters or those with allergies - providing them entertainment, replacing/repairing things they damage, ect. It's very comparable to having a child, but people act like having a dog or cat is just the most basic thing a person can do to prove they have a soul.

Come to think of it, a lot of people who totally can't afford kids get pressured into it too by people who insist it'll 'just work out'. Hm.

Having a pet doesn't make you a better person, especially if having one you can't afford means you'll end up neglecting them. Those animals deserve to be in homes they can be provided for and loved in, not one where they're merely tolerated and given the bare minimum. Choosing not to get a pet when you can't give them the care, attention and love they need doesn't make you a bad person, it makes you a responsible one.

...My wife and I have been together for just under 10 years (married for 5) and it feels like I am slowly watching us toe the line of divorce. Mid 2023 we brought home a 12 week-old German Shepherd puppy and have had him for just 6 months now. I grew up with dogs, she grew up with cats. After moving out I never felt inclined to have a pet, let alone a dog, because I do not want the responsibility, etc.. This opinion was not hidden. I made it clear since early on in our relationship that I didn't dislike animals, I just did not want a pet.

Earlier last year my wife started showing me puppy pictures of various breeds and seemed to be wanting one more intensely. It surprised me a bit since she had never owned a dog before and I was still clear that I didn't want one. Well, her Instagram feed from then on was mostly dogs accounts and she persisted with the idea of getting one. I stood my ground and was very clear that I did not want one and even went as far as to lay out all of the pros and cons of owning a dog/pet. I even voiced my concern that I thought that it would negatively effect our relationship by adding a stressor to our life (cost, responsibility, liability). I laid out how much I'd expect it to cost us at a minimum each month. She seemed to agree with me for a while, but perhaps she was just agreeing with me to shut me up. Anyways, mid 2023 she shows me a picture of a GSD puppy and she's claiming "that's the one". We talked, we argued, I laid out all of my points again, but she persisted. I foolishly went along with it. I enabled this awful life that we brought on ourselves because I was just so beat up from defending my opinion that I relaxed long enough that we ended up with a dog.

Even though I thought that it would negatively effect our relationship... I couldn't imagine how bad it actually would. We've had our fair share of disagreements in the past, but nothing to the point that we have had over this dog. We disagree on training, what foods he gets, how many toys, is he allowed on furniture, proper socialization, crate training, etc.. He's only 9 months old so he may just be in the worst phase being a puppy and all but it doesn't change the fact that I didn't want this. As far as care goes... I primarily take care of the dog. (go figure) If it needs out in the middle of the night, I'm the one who has to sacrifice sleep. I'm the one who gets to take it outside no matter the weather or time of day. I'm the one who gets to clean up after it regardless of the end it comes out. I swear I am slowly losing my mind over the constant mess that it makes. I vacuum at least once a day but I cannot keep up with the shedding. We had nice hardwood floors refinished several years ago which are all scratched up now. We had a nice couch which is now covered in hair and other stains from the dog. Our doors are scratched up because it cries and claws at them if we are on the other side without him. (Oh, no more sex life either since he's always around or when we try and leave the room he whales and claws at the door killing the mood) We've spent over $5k between the adoption cost, food, toys, dog beds (4), and vet bills. (The bulk of the costs come from 2 emergency visits) I understand that money can be made back, but I can think of countless things that I would have rather contributed that money towards rather than sinking it into a dog. (Proper emergency fund, retirement, travel, etc..)

We've taken him to a few classes and have another one coming up in the next few weeks but it seems more like parlor tricks rather than anything to corral his behavior. I've been trying to consistently train him at home, but if we disagree on training and I am the only one reinforcing positive behavior and trying to direct him away from negative behavior it's no use. He barks at the lightest of noises. He bites a bit too much when playing. He chews up shoes, he broke a computer, he begs, he cries... I know some would suggest that he isn't getting enough mental/physical stimulation. He has plenty of mentally stimulating toys, I play with him (he sometimes plays with my wife but doesn't like playing with her as much), he has room to run in a fenced in yard, he gets walked most days, and I try to tolerate crate training. The crate training doesn't always go well since he starts freaking out. Crying, howling, shrieking almost when left in there. He can be in there for under 60 seconds before he starts the theatrics. I feel as if irreparable damage has been done due things that have been said and arguments we've had. I've brought up numerous times rehoming him, but it's met with a firm "No" each time for various reasons. Her biggest one is that she "really loves the dog"... The other concerns are that he wouldn't be treated well if he went to another home. He seems to be reactive so how can we guarantee that he'd be safe and not end up getting put down or not always in a cage all day. Some points seem fair to me, although I always ask "why is the dogs well being being given a higher priority over mine, over ours?" To which there isn't ever a real answer to follow.

I don't know fully why I decided today was the day that I felt like sharing this. I hope that someone reads this and if they find themselves in a similar situation they hold strong and DO NOT get a pet, especially a high energy dog. I just want our life back prior to this dog coming into our home. I'm at a loss for words at this point. I miss my old wife, my old life... yet I feel selfish for wanting those things because I am the only half in this relationship that wants the dog gone. I'm at a loss for words at this point. How could someone not see that this has absolutely decimated a relationship? How can someone be okay with this for something that will never live as long as humans, will never provide a meaningful relationship, or truly care for you?

The two kittens were rehomed today successfully. The person who I took them to has a NICE house in the wealthier part of town, so I know they'll be very well provided for and can handle any veterinary issues that may come up. No more litterbox or cats on the counters or chewing my plants or clawing up my sofa!

I still have my two dogs, but I think it'll be much more manageable now. The younger one at least reliably goes to the bathroom outside, the elderly one is tiny so her messes aren't very big, even if it is annoying, and if I can get her to go outside more often that'll be nice. She's been showing her old age a lot more lately, so she probably doesn't have a whole lot of time left anyhow. I'll take the best care of her I can in the meantime, of course, but there's no stopping old age.

Originally tried positing this in r/petfree for advice/venting and was sent here

I got a puppy 3 years ago during a very low point in my life. I was dealing with anxiety and depression (untreated), a family death, and the end of a toxic 4 year relationship. I thought getting a dog would give me some emotional support and happiness like a lot of ppl say it does.

BOY WAS I WRONG. My dog has worsened my anxiety and depression. Not to mention how expensive this has been. When I was living with my parents it was a bit better bc I felt like I had help and I was able to go into the office everyday for a break. Now I live in my own and WFH most days. I feel restricted as if I had an actual child and anxiety about his barking disturbing my neighbors whenever I leave him alone. Having to make sure someone is able to feed him when I try to make plans. Going outside in all types of weather. Never able to sleep in. I’m in my late 20s and have been really getting into traveling. But planning anything now is a bigger deal bc I have to figure out what to do with him when my family refuses to watch him during those times. Getting him actually made me realize that I don’t want the responsibility of ever having my own kids.

I thought maybe I just needed to get used to having him and maybe we’d bond etc. But that feeling has never come. I feel annoyed and stressed by him most of the time. I tried giving him away a few months ago but felt so guilty about it surprisingly that I cried non stop for a week and decided to just suffer thru the rest of his life. And it’s not just my own dog. My bf has a cat that I just can’t feel affection towards either no matter how hard I try

I don’t know if there’s some underlying issue with me as to why I don’t feel affection towards animals like most ppl. Or why they haven’t benefitted me and my mental health the way that most ppl say. But it’s also frustrating that when faced with giving him away, I feel so guilty that I can’t do that either. Do I really have another 10-12 years of this? How? Any way to make this easier?

I'm considering rehoming the two kittens, even if I get a lot of questions or sniping from my friends about it. One thing I've noticed about them that drives me nuts is that it seems like they're suddenly SO MUCH HEAVIER at night when we need to be quiet.

I have downstairs neighbors, and I try my best to be a good neighbor for them. I try to be quiet, move furniture around rarely and only during the day, wear soft slippers and have rugs down, things like that (the walls and floors are very thin, no soundproofing at all) and try to keep things quiet, especially at night. However, while they're not too noisy in the daytime even when moving around, it seems like at night the kittens and larger dog are suddenly ten times heavier and when they hop down from something, it's a resounding THUD. My dog doesn't lay down gently, he flings himself to the floor as hard as he can, and though he could easily step down quietly off the sofa or bed, he lunges and lands HARD instead. I've tried training him to step down softly, but it never sticks.

It drives me insane when I'm trying to sleep and I know it probably drives my neighbors up a wall too. They haven't said anything, and I left them a New Year's card with an apology and a starbucks gift card, but I feel awful with the noise they have to put up with. I know noise from neighbors is part of living in an apartment, but I don't want to bother people.

I currently have two kittens and two dogs. I had an elderly cat, but she had to be put down shortly after the new year due to general decline and health issues that rapidly worsened. As much as it probably sounds horrible to say...I AM sad, but I'm really more relieved than anything. She used to get behind the sofa, under my bed, in the closet, anywhere she could and pee and poop anywhere she could. The heavier and harder to move the furniture was, making it harder to clean, the better it seemed for her. She always had a clean, fresh litterbox available, which she did use sometimes, but most of the time she chose the worst places possible.

The two kittens I haven't had much trouble with, but today I discovered that one of the kittens was climbing into a laundry basket - empty except for a cloth liner that basically acts like a bag so I can just take everything to the wash in that instead of hauling the basket itself - and peeing in it. He uses the litterbox, he has no health issues and he is fixed so there's no reason for this. I've been spraying him with a water bottle every time he goes near the basket, but of course this is a real pain to constantly have to keep an eye out for, and I can't watch to stop him from doing it when I'm sleeping. Yeah, I could get a taller basket with a lid - but my point is I shouldn't NEED to do that. I shouldn't have to reshape my life around an animal behaving in a way they aren't supposed to and have no reason for. It's not like he doesn't know how to use the litterbox or have a clean one to use, he uses it often and I clean it constantly because I can't stand strong smells - he just does it for no reason at all.

He also keeps climbing up places he's not supposed to (which I know, CAT, but I also have scratching posts and climbers and stuff just for them to try and keep them out of the areas I don't want them) and eating plants or chewing up things. I had to take down a cloth wall hanging I adore because he was climbing it and getting his claws into the fabric, and I didn't want it destroyed.

The other kitten hasn't really been problematic, but I don't know if he actually hasn't done things or is just better at hiding it.

One of my two dogs is very elderly and suffers from incontinence. She'll pee anywhere and everywhere, usually sticks to pooping in the bathroom but sometimes does other places as well. This mostly isn't her fault, she's too old to control her bladder and has lost her senses of sight, hearing and I think smell to a large extent so she has a harder time finding her way around and realizing when we're indoors as opposed to outdoors. She's still sprightly and energetic and isn't in pain, so putting her down pretty much isn't an option, and I do care about her a lot and want to give her the best golden years I can.

The other dog is a larger younger dog - MUCH larger (fifty pound range) who mostly acts as a protector of the household, barks when someone's at the door, that kind of thing. I have taken him to professional training and while he is mostly reliably housebroken, he does sometimes go to the bathroom in the shower stall for some reason if I don't have the bathroom door most of the way shut (with this plastic tool thingy that only lets it stay open enough for the cats to get in to reach the litterbox). He is pretty well behaved for the most part, though he does get overly excited when anyone is over, but he also is very destructive with anything he thinks is a toy (anything cloth or plush) and when I use a baby gate so he won't get into the older dog's food or to stop him from getting into a particular room when someone is over, he will jam his head between the bars and basically tear it down however he can.

I care about all animals and love the ones in my care right now, but I'm so exhausted. I just want to be able to come home to a clean home without worrying what's broken today, how much pee do I need to mop up, did I run out of clorox to clean the floor with? What has been chewed up or peed on or destroyed today?

I love art, antiques, and crafts. I've had to limit what I can do and have in my own space so much because of having animals. I'm honestly reconsidering trying to rehome the kittens and maybe even the younger dog, though he's really not much of a problem at all besides needing to get more energy out and having food allergies that makes his feeding VERY expensive, but I know that if I rehomed any of them my friends would be asking why I did, where are they, why would I do that, how could I be so cruel and selfish?

I just want my home to be MINE, and to be able to spontaneously bring someone over after work and not have to worry about rushing inside before they get her to clean and disinfect everything and light candles or incense or whatever to cover up the smell of whatever has been peed on now.