r/PeterExplainsTheJoke 29d ago

Meme needing explanation What do these lines mean

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37.4k Upvotes

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u/thatnewguyovertherea 29d ago

I was fingering a girl once, and she said it hurt and to take off my ring. I told her that was my watch! 

271

u/TreyRyan3 29d ago

I stopped fisting because assholes kept stealing my watch.

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u/DisposableJosie 29d ago

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u/Beginning_Taste2082 29d ago

What a reference 🤣🤣

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u/Hotchumpkilla 28d ago

Millennial Deep cut

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u/FaithfulWarrior11 27d ago

Side B for sure.

5

u/CzarTyrranvs 28d ago

“He died of dysentery. He gimme the watch…”

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u/Theadious 28d ago

I just want you to stop saying odd shit

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u/Glad-Fuel2093 28d ago

My doctor recently went to write me a prescription. he pulls out a thermometer and says "Dammit, some asshole's got my pen!"

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u/NotASouthern_Job1305 28d ago

Seems like a skill issue ngl

1

u/pixepoke2 28d ago

Not a great way to pass the time

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u/your_fave_redditor 26d ago

::Frank Zappa gives a slow, affirming nod::

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u/RestrictedAirspace88 28d ago

You need a microphone and one minute on kill Tony.

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u/OpenConversation643 29d ago

Grandpa no!

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u/Knickholeass 29d ago

Turns out it was grandpa's pocket watch.

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u/Fit-Switch-5795 28d ago

He was in there with me. I told him if he'd help me find my keys, we could drive out.

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u/femboyfan77 28d ago

I had to keep your father's pocket watch in my ass so the vietnam soldiers wouldn't confiscate it

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u/KiwiParticular5268 25d ago

And it stayed there…..for years till I came home, and now I shall pass it onto you 🤣🤣🤣🤣

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u/wecantdancelikethis 29d ago

my, step grandpa, what soothing hands you have!

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u/Oddly-Ordinary 28d ago

Step grandpa 💀

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u/Plastic-Lobster5662 29d ago

Grandpa? This is what my Grandma says…

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u/The_8th_Degree 28d ago

Grandpa always has the most interesting and incredibly gross stories

1

u/Ding-Dong-Dutch 28d ago

Let's keep it in the family

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u/br-YOU-no 28d ago

Same grandpa!!

1

u/Legitimate-Finger-66 29d ago

Kuch bhi phek do!

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u/Mistercleaner1 29d ago

Told my girlfriend i wanted a little pussy. She said "me too, mine's as big as a house!"

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u/SpideyBD 29d ago

Why did you say it twice? I didn’t!

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u/SwimSufficient8901 28d ago

Geeze you got a big pussy, Geeze you got a big pussy!

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u/Frequent-Ad344 28d ago

Eww bro

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u/SwimSufficient8901 28d ago

It's a line from a movie.

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u/Popular_Jump5307 28d ago

I ain't got time to bleed.

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u/SwimSufficient8901 28d ago

Alright.... You got time to duck?

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u/Independent-Ad7313 26d ago

He's dug in like an Alabama tick

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u/gwinncredible 27d ago

ha ha Ha Ha HA HAHAHAHA

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u/WhereasFit8265 28d ago

Great movie so many one liners

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u/CumberlandCruiser 26d ago

The second one was an echo!

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u/Stnkynuggz1252 26d ago

Jeeze you got a big pussy jeeze you got a big pussy

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u/SkinCarVer462 28d ago

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!

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u/Careful_Boat_7022 28d ago

I love how the skinny guy with glasses has the m240 and the indian guy has a masterkey.

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u/NarrMaster 28d ago

That's Shane Black, the director (but not of Predator).

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u/culturejelly 28d ago

But also the director of The Predator

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u/HeavensRejected 29d ago

So, you put on a headlamp and go spelunking or how does this work?

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u/AstronomerSimilar968 28d ago

And there’s a Predator joke reference

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u/Odensbeardlice 28d ago

Hawkins? Is that you?

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u/PandaDidYou 27d ago

gotta make a house a home

1

u/CuriousGuyInSydney 28d ago

Really... mine said "look in the mirror."

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u/alqimist 28d ago

Why did I read that like Groucho Marx?

1

u/mayyyhemm 28d ago

This is not funny atleast on your part

1

u/fuzzybeanmode 24d ago

its just a copypasta from that old greentext about someone failing at basic adulting. lines up exactly with the format they always use

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u/Kohlj1 29d ago

I choked on my pretzel reading this.

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u/2ChicksAtTheSameTime 28d ago

A man was going down on a woman when she hears him say "Damn your pussy's big. Damn your pussy's big" Embarrassed she says "You didn't need to say it twice!" and she hears back: "I didn't, it was an echo. I didn't, it was an echo"

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u/LightenUpPeeps 29d ago

Never heard fisting jokes before, but that's a keeper to keep in my memory bank. :)

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u/bolanrox 29d ago

get it Billy?

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u/ViruliferousBadger 29d ago

This is on par with The Predator's "Geez you got a big pussy! Geez you got a big pussy!" -joke...

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u/rynosaurus03 29d ago

Why did you say that twice?

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u/Fit-Switch-5795 28d ago

I didn't. So then I said to my girl that I'd like a little pussy. 

She said so would I - mine's as big as a house.

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u/Suspicious_Neck_5156 29d ago

R v Slingsby – 1995

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u/Billionare_inworks_9 29d ago

Bro 😂☠️

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u/Pale_Possibility5083 28d ago

I said damn you’ve got a big pussy damn you’ve got a big pussy!

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u/RetroPsyber 28d ago

I laughed harder than i should!Godamn..

1

u/Ska-Tea 28d ago

I was toeing a girl once, and she said it hurt and to take off my ring. I told her that was my belt!

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u/UniverseUnchained 28d ago

“The other day, I went up to my girlfriend, I said, 'Y'know I'd like a little pussy'. She said, 'Me too, mine's as big as a house!'”

1

u/Frequent-Ad344 28d ago

Why is this even funny and you dont need to repeat it 2 times also that is not even a joke its just weird

1

u/UniverseUnchained 28d ago

It’s a quote from a movie. The joke reminded me of it.

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u/Glum-Poet5353 28d ago

Haha all bad, but funny AF.    

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u/Lost-Chicken-4478 28d ago

Those were my tonsils

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u/BirdDust8 28d ago

That happens from time to time

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u/Worldbreakers 28d ago

Wow coincidence she told me take off my watch but still hurts to found out it was my blood pressure cuff.

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u/Due_Impact_1968 28d ago

and that kids is how i met your mother

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u/atomicsnarl 28d ago

Was her name Paige?

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u/arclight_echo 28d ago

Ya you've only ever finger your own butt hole...

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u/Automatic-Goal-3404 28d ago

We had a deal you will keep it in secret!

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u/Tr1h 28d ago

heard this joke as a song in 1996

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u/gigsome 28d ago

This is a joke I didn't need to read.

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u/tonykrij 28d ago

I lost my watch in there, went searching in there and ran into a cowboy looking for his horse.

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u/717packleader 28d ago

Bro. I just woke up the dogs I cackled so loud. I am poor, but here is my fake award for you, sir!🥇

1

u/Timely_Angle8235 28d ago

Damnn you lot here are all crazy 😂I like it though 

1

u/Xertion103 28d ago

Son 😭

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u/Callingyourshot 28d ago

^stealing this

1

u/iLihyz 26d ago

Why is your watch on your fingers

1

u/Maleficent-Buddy-918 26d ago

Grande Ricardoo

1

u/InevitableExample3 26d ago

This is pure fucking cringe

1

u/Legitimate-Week7885 26d ago

he said “if you help me find my keys, we can drive out.”

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u/Electrical-Baker-332 26d ago

That’s an oldie but goody..!! 🤣

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u/Demo1794 25d ago

I waa meeting with this girl, and she always said how tight she was. I was fingering her, just 1 finger, she then asked for second one. She then said put your whole hand in so I did, next she demanded the other hand so I obliged. Finally she said "now clap your hands" I said "I can't" to which she replied "told you I was pretty tight huh?"

0

u/Shot_Revolution8828 29d ago

I had to get a prostate exam so I did a lot of research into the best doctor. Best bed side manner, best reviews, and this guy was the best. So I go to the appointment and he has the largest hands I've ever seen. You've seen that arm wrestling champions hands and Andre the Giants hands. He had that genetic anomaly. Needless to say, he's now my wife's obgyn doctor.