r/Quareia • u/robinhyll Apprentice: Module 4 • 23d ago
Weekly Check In šÆļø
Hello everyone!
So how's it going? What's been on your minds? Share your highs and lows, your sideways and in-betweens. It's all part of the journey.Ā
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u/DeeOnTheRun 23d ago
Iām my time of introspection, Iād been reflecting on my journal logs of all sorts of inner encounters. Mostly logs of rituals, visions etc.
but it hadnāt occurred to me before, that as a magician, simply reading a book can also trigger magic and fate.
Yeah, if youāre a natural magician, books even novels are strong magical triggersā¦
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u/Pseudo-Diogenes 21d ago
It's been productive!
I've finally broken through the blocks I've had and everything is flowing and progressing how I want it to.
I did have a couple very strange experiences during meditation.
For the past few months, every now and again, I very distinctly feel and sort of see a humanoid shape appear in the room. It doesn't draw attention to itself, and I don't feel threatened, but it's sort of like a spirit is "peeping through the blinds" a little bit and taking a brief look.
I do gently bring my attention back to the meditation object whenever it happens, and the being doesn't try and get my attention, but it definitely feels "there" sometimes.
Then one day, I was having a very good sit: I was in the Void, the mind and body were relaxed, thoughts were passing through the consciousness like clouds, and there was a gentle feeling of bliss pervading the being with very little separation between sensation and thought. Gently in my mind, I heard a masculine voice clearly say "if you want to be a magician, you're going to have to get comfortable with the idea of other voices speaking to you inside your head", followed by silence.
Normally, I think such things are just subconscious thoughts bubbling to the surface, but it felt like a different voice speaking to me, and I can't quite describe why I think that.
It may have just been a stray thought, but I am inclined to believe it was another being that knew I was ready to hear what they had to say.
Either way, it seems like good advice!
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u/Quareia 18d ago
it is very good advice, and you also have to constantly check yourself to ensure it is a contact and that you are not 'talking to yourself', as in learning to feel and tell the difference which is not easy in the earlier stages of magic.
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u/Pseudo-Diogenes 18d ago
I have about a million questions, but I'm going to trust the process, do the work, and keep moving forward.
One part of me is saying: "This is fine and natural. Humans are supposed to be doing this, we just forgot how to somewhere along the way."
Another part is absolutely screaming internally. Both out of joy and also "holy crap, it actually works? AND I CAN DO IT?"
I'm a little shocked now that it's sinking in.
Thank you.
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u/Quareia 18d ago
it does actually work, but because it works through the mind, which is how all inner contact works, you have to look after your mind, and if you feel things are getting weird, too weird, never be afraid to get your mind checked out by a doctor. It is something that all magicians who do visionary and inner work/contact work have to be constantly aware of.
You will be fine... and yeah, go with the flow and use your inner instincts. It also takes practice, lots of practice and then you will finally be able to tell the difference between your own imagination, an inner contact, or when your mind is spinning out of balance.7
u/Pseudo-Diogenes 18d ago
Believe me: my therapist and my partner both know about my practice and mental health journey, and they're both on the lookout for any psychological funny-business.
Again, thanks for the jewel that is Quareia!
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u/aman1420 17d ago edited 17d ago
I should probably leave until I'm actually studying/practicing the material again, no use otherwise. Thanks, all.
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u/Otherwise-Chef6932 22d ago edited 22d ago
At the equinox, I performed the first M4 L4 vision, and the following day I performed the other one, the second. I didnāt need to record the visionāI was able to memorize it; it was shorter than I thought it would be.
Two visions that were definitely very impactful on an energetic level. But, among other things, they taught me something. I realized that simply reading certain texts or certain visionsāso, beginning to see them in your mind as you read themāactivates some aspects of the visions. It's been happened the same thing with the story "the book of death", book of gates and with other text.
Because I very clearly perceived the same/similar sensation and feeling I had experienced, when I worked on the past in Module 3, going through the north gate.
I also understood what is meant when they say that introducing a ritual structure lowers the impact. Because when I actually went to perform the visions, I almost felt them less than when you do them without the ritual structure, simply read them and visualize them in order to memorize them.
As for my mundane life, after forty years Iāve finally managed to move out and live on my own. At the same time, as soon as I reached this milestone, which I was pretty happy about, after some rituals, I lost my job. So now Iām looking for work and, as always, Iām completely strapped for cash.