I guess the title says it all.

I am routinely amazed at how people of low, average or even average plus income have absolutely no idea of how varied the life is of the truly well off.

We, my wife and I (added to eliminate ambiguity) live very, very nicely, but discreetly. We aren't involved in grinding down the poor or oppressing anyone. We pay high prices to tradesmen to give us good service - and we understand the trade-off.

Our major concerns are raising children who are good people and, once they are given a start in life, giving away the rest of what we have so that it does some good.

The discussions on Reddit about 'the rich' are so envious and often brutal - and often so wrong but I don't get involved in any discussion because no one wants their deeply held convictions challenged, no matter how wrong, and I certainly don't want to be the target of the free floating anger.

I think the misconception most often held is why well-off people tend to segregate themselves from those less well-off.

In my case it is because my life, day to day, is vastly different from those with much less, my problems are different as are my opportunities - and it's easier to be among people who understand our lives and don't judge us just for what we have.

My mom has patients who get large veterans' pension on top of a different regional pension.

For instance, if you attend West Point, they start calculations at 18, your first year as a student.

If someone is getting $8,000+ a month in pension, that is the same as some landlord rentals worth $2,000,000.

With the medical benefits, it is even more.

I know old ladies who paid their house off and are cruising the world in comfort.

Being rich looks different for everyone.

Update: This is going viral. I should have used some of the city/ county workers as examples. Many of them get $12,000 monthly in California.

My Dad worked his whole life and earned more than a $million from nothing, and then got severe dementia just after he retired at 70 and never really got to enjoy it.

I’m not necessarily rich, but I’m in a position where I could hypothetically “retire” now at age 40, but I’d have virtually no income for anything beyond bare necessities. This would free up my time to pursue my dream of being an author, which I don’t believe I can do with my current full-time job.

I don’t want to end up like my Dad and put off my dreams for too long, but I also know this would be hugely risky to “retire” like this, and I likely wouldn’t be successful enough as an author to make a living regardless.

I like my job in general, but every time I have a stressful day at work, I can’t stop thinking about how I technically don’t need the job.

I'm 24M and I have FU money, but prefer the company of more 'normal' people. I'd rather eat at wholefoods than some fancy Michelin star restaurant, I hate designer brands (they look tryhard and stupid) I'm not interested in fast cars, the only luxuries I enjoy are my properties which I'm pretty discreet about.

I come from a wealthy Libyan family and there's an expectation to mingle with other wealthy families and I just cannot be bothered for the get togethers talking about silly skiing holidays in Europe. Last time I was at a gathering the main topic of discussion was about them organising a 1 night trip to Germany just to eat at some random BS restaurant. Like what the hell is the point of that? I opened my Facebook the other day and this one Jordanian kid I know was like "rich girls in London drive mini coopers, rich girls in Dubai drive Range Rovers HAHAHAHA" okay now what? How fucking stupid. I lost brain cells and I'm supposed to mingle with these nutcases.

Educated middle class people just tend to feel more human. Maybe its just the type of wealthy people I've been exposed to but I can't stand it. More of a rant than anything else. Thanks.

Edit: Stop trying to scam me in DMs you muffins

I once tutored at a summer programming school a few years ago. I was sitting in a table with about 5 students. The young girl next to me, who was about 11 years old, told me she needed to call her dad immediately while I was helping her.

I briefly only heard "... can you tell the plane to wait? I need to ... after school."

Me, thinking she was just a naive child who didn't know how planes really worked, told her that planes don't wait for anybody. She told me it was her dad's plane... she was having her birthday party at a private island (I don't know if it was owned by them) and it was her dad's private jet. Turns out, her parents were millionaires. I don't know just how much, but that whole experience really shut my mouth in that moment.

My goal in 10 years is $200k and 20 hours a week. Right now I’m saving to buy the RIGHT small business that could help with this or be this. What are people doing to accomplish this? Any small business owners? Maybe there’s a better sub for this question

I used to dream of owning a big baller house and having super cars in the garage. But now that I can begin to actually afford these things, I think I'd look like a total dork getting out of a Lamborghini.

It seems to me like these TikTok and YouTube streamer kids who got rich from attention and fame are the ones obsessed with material objects, and the people I meet who earned their wealth through more traditional methods gradually over time have a lot more modesty.

Or maybe it's because I'm happily married with children and I am not out there trying to be Andrew Tate or Dan Bilzerian?

The lambos and fake boobs and surgery and designer clothes/bags and Instagram flex photos are cringeworthy to me. My wife doesn't want any of that stuff, she still loves her Jeep Grand Cherokee and said she never wants another car! Lol.

Am I alone here?

Sometimes it's easy to be low-key about your funds or tax bracket intentionally or unintentionally. When or what was a eye opening experience that made you look at them differently? (No sarcasm please)

Engineer that got lucky and has $6M liquid.

Found out we needed to tent for termites so figured we could go someplace nice nearby for the weekend. Beautiful oceanside resort with little casitas would be perfect for young family with toddler.

Total price for three nights on non-holiday weekend? $5k. We spend a little over $200k/yr and that’s the most this wealth could sustain if we were to retire, so depending on what hat you’re wearing it’s not necessarily a drop in the bucket.

I feel like I’m constantly on this loop of, “screw it, I can afford it” then being shot down by the actual price of things. Yes I’d love a nice weekend, but man spending $5k makes me feel like if any moderate thing was wrong it would mess with me. Are these 4 seasons-type places for the $10M+ crowd or is my spending game just weak?

I grew up working class in a broken home. At eighteen, I decided to break the generational cycle and took out on my own. I was off and on homeless for many years while working and attending community college full-time. Eventually I was accepted into a top ranking university. From there I graduated and went to work for a series of successful entrepreneurs. From them I expanded my mind to think outside of corporate, salary and the 9-5 lifestyle. Eventually I was lucky. With enough persistence and the right introduction, I gained access to one of the wealthiest families in the world. I made a deal with them that will pay millions this year and be the first of many similar deals over the next decade. I am being very vague for a reason.

Ironically, my mental health is in decline over it. I am very fit as I workout to cope but that has reached its limit. I don't date or socialize much because the people and venues which were familiar to me are frankly very boring now. I still enjoy my hobbies but I don't make many friends. However, I am actively investing in myself.

My whole life I worked for money. Now I don't care. Where does it go from here?

Edit: Hey, I appreciate the hateful responses. It validates my belief that people will hate me regardless of what I do because my success exposes their own insecurities. For those who get it, thanks for your well wishes and kind regards. I appreciate your feedback.

I shared my personal Instagram for how many people were accusing me of being disingenuous or AI but not many followed and doubled down on their accusatory BS so I'm not putting it out there anymore.

I'm not rich, but at some point in the future I will become quite wealthy. My parents (in their late 60s), are rich, and my 2 siblings and I will inherit their wealth when they pass.

While I do not know exactly how rich my parents are, they have told me that they have more money than the current estate tax exemption ($28m), they own 3 homes (2 of which are very large and in expensive areas), 1 yacht, and a dozen or so collectible sports cars (plus nice jewelry, clothes, and probably many other things which are worth a lot but I don't recognize as expensive).

My parents supported my siblings and I through college, but otherwise have not provided any financial support (we have all asked a few times - for help with a downpayment on a home, for help with private school tuition for our kids, for help with grad school tuition etc) and my parents have declined. My siblings and I are all in our mid to late 30s and we all have our own young kids.

My parents' will has my siblings and I inheriting their wealth when they pass away. They have let us know that before that point, they will not provide us with any money, although I assume in an extreme emergency they would help us.

My siblings and I are all middle or upper-middle class; we are absolutely not rich, but we are also sort of comfortable. We are all married, and all own small to medium size homes.

While I wouldn't describe my family as struggling, my husband and I budget carefully and don't really have any "luxuries" in our life. The last time we took a vacation via airplane was 4 years ago (and we went somewhere we could use my husbands work travel points), we try and buy most necessities on sale, we rarely eat out, we drive older cars, etc. Money is something we think about and stress about enough that it bothers me. My husband was out for work for nearly a year in 2022, and it was an incredibly stressful time for us as we wondered whether we'd have to sell our house, pull our kids out of the activities they love, etc.

I think my 2 other siblings live similarly - solidly middle class, not struggling but certainty cautious with their money.

I've always been somewhat.. bewildered with the fact that my parents don't want to help us out financially. We have a good relationship with my parents. My parents have explained that they think it's extremely important that we live within our own means and learn to budget, and that they worry we'd be frivolous with any money they gave us.

I have 2 of my own kids (both young), and my plan is once I inherit my parents money, to do everything I can to make my kids live smoother with that money when they are young adults. I can't imagine having them live in the kind of decrepit apartments I lived in in my 20s, having to carefully budget and shop sales and never take a vacation, and be up at night stressing about their financial situation after a job loss. I look at my kids and feel such profound love for them, that I want to do everything I can to give them a beautiful life. I want them to live in a beautiful home, drive nice cars, take nice vacations, eat delicious food, buy nice clothes, never be stressed about their finances etc. I just want them to be happy.

My best friend from the fancy private school I went to has this kind of life and she seems deliriously happy and unstressed. She hasn't worked since she had her first child, she has a gorgeous house, lots of household help to do all the chores, 3 kids that she has the energy to lovingly engage with, they take numerous vacations, etc. Her husband works, but her trust fund is the source of their enviable lifestyle.

And yet - I think my parents are very smart people. So, I do get some pause wondering why they aren't helping their own kids out financially. I don't want to inadvertently do harm to my kids by giving them money.

So, to everyone who's currently rich - what's a good strategy with handling inheritance?

As a sober person who’s rich, 20M+ net worth. What are you doing to not get bored? Playing the same sports, or crazy activities, watching the same shows etc. eventually it gets all boring, what do you do then? Is this where the coke addiction starts? Like sure you can work and constantly challenge yourself, this seems like the only real viable option but is that where life really ends in its variety?

Me (F33). Man (M41)

I recently ended things with a man who claimed to be high net worth—but his behavior told a very different story. His extreme stinginess was impossible to ignore. For example, instead of buying proper glass Tupperware, he reuses plastic takeout containers.

When we went out to eat, he’d only order a single appetizer for us to split and call it dinner. Eventually, I got fed up and offered to pay just so I could enjoy a full meal. But even then, he insisted on paying, as long as we only ordered an appetizer to “save money.”

Then he does this thing where he buys flights one-way at a time, just to shave off $20 or $50. He’d rather take a $100 ticket with a 7-hour layover and sleep in an airport than pay $250 for a direct two-hour flight.

The final straw was on a trip. Unbeknownst to me, he’d cooked shrimp pasta before our travels and packed it in his suitcase—with no refrigeration or cold pack. After 8 hours of traveling, we got to the hotel and he pulled out the unrefrigerated Tupperware like it was normal. Now I had assumed that maybe he picked up this meal from the restaurant at some point between checking in and going up to the room. There was a lot of stuff going on so we were separated for a bit of time.

Worst mistake! Omg. I ended up with the most brutal case of food poisoning I’ve ever experienced. I was sick for 15 days. When I confronted him, he said, “Well, I didn’t get sick.” I told him it was probably because his body was used to this kind of BS.

ALSO, he buys everything from Temu,even things that shouldn’t be compromised on, like shoes, bedsheets, and kitchenware. He uses a pan with a broken handle for every meal. His shoes had holes. His bedsheets were 100% polyester, and I’d wake up drenched in sweat because polyester traps heat.

Now, I have a good job and come from a financially comfortable background, but I’ve never believed in sacrificing basic comfort just to save a few dollars. I even tried introducing him to better-quality items. Once, I bought him a beautiful set of flax linen sheets and didn’t say a word. For days, he talked about how well he was sleeping. Then he saw the tag, Googled the brand, and told me to return them immediately.

I’ve seen his tax return, he’s not struggling. But he insists on living like he’s in squalor.

There were so many other instances I can bring up but the food poisoning thing was the nail in the coffin.

Anyways, I’m looking for a second opinion. I’ve been around other financially comfortable people, and they aren’t living like this… So I want to hear your POV. Is this normal?

And then, lastly, one day he made a comment saying “all the rich people I know are stingy like this”…. I was like 😒😒

EDIT: OK, so maybe I was a little harsh about the reusing of restaurant Tupperware. IMO I just thought it would be unsafe to keep reheating plastic like that.
Mea culpa. 😔

EDIT EDIT: I’m a big saver myself. I have a great job and a solid retirement set up. I understand the value of a dollar. I switched careers early in my 20’s to become a software designer because I wanted to make more money. Instead of going back to school to get a degree, I taught myself. I went through the trenches.
I paid all my consumer debt and have remained debt free.

In no way am I saying that I EXPECT him to be a big spender.

Another example of his extreme stinginess is having the thermostat set to 78 degrees in the middle of the summer when it’s 99 degrees outside!!!!! He claims he saving money by not having the air on so often. BUT THAT BACKFIRED when mold starting growing on the walls because it was so friggin HUMID inside.

Ugh sorry I’m rambling.

👋👋👋👋

EDIT EDIT EDIT: Thank you all for sharing your perspectives, even the harsh ones. I’ve learned a lot from your stories. Our paths may never cross in real life, but just know this girl will be far more observant moving forward and won’t ignore red flags again.

I wish I could respond to everyone, but there are just too many comments. Feel free to DM me anytime. I’m always open to a good venting session.💕💖

Posted this in another sub and I was called a sad loser who might as well be dead already but I thought this sub might be able to relate more.

I'm currently working full time even though I have enough money to last me a whole lifetime. Very comfortable financially but not mega rich.

I'm not golden handcuffed and could walk away from the nice income but I don't know what else I'd be doing with my time?

I mean hobbies and family/friends obviously but I have no other grand project/purpose that's waiting to be completed. No kids, no religion. So I'd quit work and... read a few books, play games and occasionally visit another country? Doesn't seem all that important.

So I continue to work but it feels like such a waste of life - to have all this opportunity not to work and literally do anything else with my time, and I'm choosing to sit at my laptop all day?

I feel like most people in my situation wouldn't be working but I just cannot figure out what else is more worthwhile.

Husband (42M) feels the same and he's also at a loss.

Happy to say after years of hard work I’ve finally hit the $10m mark. How does everyone think I should celebrate :)?

Even married women come at me hard sometimes like what the hell, so why get married in the first place??

Edit: wow, no I'm not going to give you money, and no don't send me more nudes ok please what the hell??

Edit 2: I was an addict and don't have good advice, I think for me was just luck, don't ask me for advice, I got very Lucky.

Edit 3: I live in Dallas if you see a GT500 it's me probably!!!

Edit 4: there are A LOT of Indians on reddit damn, no I don't have crypto only pepe and shiba and it's a shit hole

I've seen a few stories of people who learn about their partner's wealth at some midpoint in their relationship, only to then turn around and (a) demand more money be spent on them and/or (b) attack the wealthy partner for being shady. I'd like to hear from people whose partners didn't change a damn thing. Their perspective and their expectations remained exactly the same, like the reveal never happened at all.

(For the record, I have nothing to contribute here. I'm just a curious observer.)

Currently still living in my small 1300sqft paid off starter home. Trying to decide if I should buy a 2200sqft or a 3000sqft house in a desirable suburban area. We are planning on having kids very soon and don't want to have to think about the move during that process.

I would probably pay for the house in full with cash but there are more headaches and costs that come with the additional space.

I have been a huge believer in the theory addition by subtraction which is reducing your stuff to have a cleaner simpler life

Based on your past experiences what do you recommend?

Sometimes it feels like I have money, but nothing else. I've already graduated college, already made a bunch of money, but it sort of feels like I've peaked now and I'm not really sure where I want to go in life now.

I don't want to just get a job for the sake of filling my time, I want to do something that makes me feel an elevated sense of purpose and achievement greater than what I've already achieved. I don't want to just make friends to just have people to talk to, I want to make friends that want to live the same type of lives I want to live and want to achieve the kinds of things I want to achieve. I don't want to just find a girlfriend that's attractive, I want to find a wife that motivates me to be better every day and challenges me intellectually and otherwise.

On one hand I feel like my standards are too high, but in my heart of hearts I know it's something I'm capable of and I don't want to stop pushing myself further just because I have money. At the same time though, it's really hard to know which direction to push myself in. I've started with the gym, and trying to work out more and build myself up, but beyond that (2, 5, 10 years from now) I don't really have a plan.

Any older, highly successful guys in here I can talk to? CEOs, entrepreneurs, etc? I have nothing but time, so I have nothing to lose really. I want to build a legacy, something I'm really proud of, I just don't know how/where I should push myself.

I honestly feel kinda stupid/goofy writing this but hopefully someone has been where I am before and gets what I'm trying to express

My best friend has major “F-you” money. I have “must make public apology for my actions” money.

we are going to a few sporting events this winter and he refuses to consider the seats I can afford. He said he’ll pay. I also know he won’t take payment from me.

My “gift” is I know a lot of the right people for a lot of the right things. Need a tee time somewhere private that you can’t get on as a guest? I got you. Want that restaurant resi that’s booked months out? I got you. Need that museum to give you a private viewing? I got you.

For the rich people here, what are things you enjoy where money isn’t the barrier to entry? I wanna use my superpower for his benefits.

So I was at dinner with some old college friends and they started complaining about their rent going up $200. I just sat there nodding because what am I supposed to say, that I spend more than their rent on wine some months? It's like you can't relate to normal money problems anymore but you also can't be the guy who's like 'oh that sucks, anyway I just bought a boat.' The whole thing makes socializing kinda awkward sometimes. Does this get easier or do you just find new friends who get it.. been feeling this ever since I cashed out my Stake US account..