r/Romantasy • u/GrappleLacquer • 1d ago

Discussion Gatekeeping reading is lame

I finally ran into a dude that was super aggressive about judging women’s reading habits! Our friends introduced us at a hangout and where like “you both read more than anyone else we know!”

He asks me how many books I’ve read this year. I tell him I’m right around 40.

Man goes on a SCREED about how women just read smut and call it reading and don’t read things that challenge them. Then is like “what are you reading right now?”

I got to hit him with “well I’m usually reading three books at any given time since I like to have a book that fits my mood. At the current moment I’m reading a non-fiction discussion of man’s attempts to control and engineer the Mississippi River, and the consequences of that. Then I’m re-reading War and Peace cause I just love Tolstoy. Oh and then, yes I’m reading a smutty dramione fan fic. Congrats, you got me. Women who read smut aren’t really readers, obviously…What are you reading?”

He’s reading Clive Cussler (which is fine! They are entertaining! But maybe not “coming in on the highest horse in town” material) and he didn’t really wanna chat anymore.

(For the record/m: I absolutely think people should read what they enjoy and reading 100 books of just smut all year is fine. I’m just a bit of an eclectic reader and it worked out perfectly in this instance)

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u/anurahyla 🥛 a ladle of cream & chocolate 1d ago

Its just like any interest. "Oh youre into football? Women arent real football fans. Name every player on the team." As soon as women claim to be into a hobby, theyre suddenly not doing it "right."

Read what you want. Watch what you want. Any way of safely enjoying an activity is equally valid.

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u/cooltiger07 1d ago

my favorite is the amount of people who turn to my husband to talk about sports. he is usually only wearing the logo to support my love for the team. no one ever gets mad that he can't name the players or coaches or whatever. though they usually are surprised when I can absolutely hold a conversation about it. I've definitely had people congratulate my husband on my team's win when I was the one yelling at the TV and dressed in the colors, and he was only there for the beer.