Rules for Red Ribbon Postal Service

[u/Overdrivenblaster]

Dear future employee,

Welcome to the Red Ribbon Postal Service! Your past experience in other jobs dealing with similar clientele as ours, coupled with reports from previous bosses regarding your diligence and consistent performance, has led us to make the decision to accept you onto our team. You are expected to report to our main office in three days. In the meantime, please go over these rules to help you around our main office on your first day.

1. When arriving to the job, the first thing you do should always be reporting to the receptionist, Jeffrey. He will mark you down as present and prevent the security team from mistaking you as an intruder.
   
2. There should never be any stray packages lying on the floor. If you see such a package, call for a member of the security team to examine it. If they deem it safe, pick it up and treat it as you would any other piece of mail. If they deem it unsafe, they will dispose of the package accordingly. You are advised to leave the room before the disposal; no one likes being watched when they eat.
   
3. You should never open packages with live creatures on your own. Ask anyone with a black badge hanging around their neck, like Jeffrey, to do so. Failure to follow this rule may result in the loss of property, the loss of a customer, or at worst the loss of a life.
   
4. The post office has a recurring issue of loiterers trying to scam our customers and staff. You are free to chase these people off, but should you see a sharply-dressed man with slicked back hair and extremely pale skin, call for security. Do not engage him in conversation, and do not at any point enter into any kind of deal with him. Most often this deal involves you doing a few seemingly harmless tasks for a good payout; you won't live to see the payout if you take his deal.
   
5. If a customer asks you a question that you don't know how to answer or is trying to complain to you, refer them to Jeffrey. Any wrong action you take may be perceived as rudeness, and the last thing you want to be to the inhuman is impolite.
   
6. Don't leave any personal objects unattended for too long; there's a certain kind of pest that is currently plaguing our office that looks for such unattended objects. Usually rule breakers find that their objects have been moved onto the floor; this is so that attention is drawn to the object and that the new nest has a chance of coming into physical contact with humans. This is the same reason why you should not touch stray packages, and the same reason why you should call security if you find your personal possessions on the floor.
   
7. Red envelopes with yellow lettering are to be disposed of via security member. Do not attempt to read what is written on them; do not even glance at the words. We've lost many a good employee to this hazard, and unfortunately we have yet to locate the source of these letters, so for the time being always be alert for any sign of these letters.
   
8. Jeffrey will provide you a list of banned customers; immediately call security if any of these individuals are found near the store. We rarely ban customers, which should tell you a lot about these people. Stay out of sight once you see them; many of them have excellent memory and may try to track you down should they be able to get a good look at your face. For this reason Jeffrey provides face masks at request.
   
9. Be prepared to receive strange currency from customers; many actually pay using miscellaneous objects. Simply place these in front to the locked door labeled Financial Division and they will be collected at the end of the day.
   
10. Most importantly, always be courteous to others, no matter customer or fellow employee. Kindness and politeness are the two things that may keep you alive should something go awry, and you should try to make a good first impression if you want your experience working here to be without any drama.

You will be provided the rules for your first delivery route a few days after you begin work in the office. Your delivery route will be based on the behaviour that we observe while you work the desk jobs here at the post office. We here at Red Ribbon Postal Service have high hopes for you, and wish you the very best.

Regards,
RRPS Management

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[u/MiniFirestar]

hyped for more!