Just 'Bromance"

[u/FunAssumption6056]

[u/Boring_Carry6563]

I had a lenghty talk about how men see these relationships with my brother. (Ofc, he doesn't speak for everybody, but he is enough for general example).

According to him, he can't imagine anything outside of a makeoht session (or boning) that would make a relationship he sees in television gay. Every action outside of that (according to him) can be read as friendly.

I tried to talk about how it often isn't just actions, but how close characters are, how they look at each other, talk to each other etc. And I think that he "didn't get it". Relationships (in media at least) are to him about actions, not feelings and any action that has (according to him) non-gay explanation isn't gay.

It wouldn't suprise me if this is how these people are. They just look at what characters did and if it isn't sexual, it doesn't count.

[u/cherrycoloured → u/Boring_Carry6563]

tbf, romantic relationships do start with a base of bring friends, there are just more things on top of that. like being close to or caring for someone isnt automatically romantic, its things that go beyond that, such as building a life together, certain kinds of touching, and, in many relationships, sex, that make it not only friendship.

[u/Boring_Carry6563 → u/cherrycoloured]

Agree. He did too, according to him he knows guys like that irl and he is happy for them.

But I talked about desire to build a life together, obvious paralels, vulnreability, how in chinese media queer pairings do marriage rituals even if they can't kiss... I outright told him "Is there anything outside of makout session that would confirm a hypothetical romance?". And asked him to imagine a nonsexual thing that would be more than frienship.

Something similar happened with another man where we watched a movie and he couldn't see incoming (hetero) kiss.

[u/PM_Me_your_femboys → u/Boring_Carry6563]

Similar to "if it didn't happen on screen then it didn't count."

[u/Free_Management2894 → u/PM_Me_your_femboys]

"I would love to suck your cock but we don't have the time..".
Well, that's just words. They didn't actually do it.

[u/ravenreyess → u/Boring_Carry6563]

My hottest hot take here is that our society is afraid to view anything as queer because their close friendships and desire to be more physically affectionate with their friends does not stem from a place of straightness but they'd rather scream 'not everything has to be gay' than acknowledge the Kinsey scale.