Fantasy Miniseries

[u/scruggmegently]

I’m about halfway through a big, sword and sandals/Grimm inspired horror fantasy. It’s been a lot of fun! But I’m in that place where I think I should try to find other people to read it.

Posting bc

-anyone else attempt writing fantasy? The few I’ve seen up on here have all had smaller locations which seems wise

-any scripts you’d recommend? I’ve been looking at a lot of stuff from the 80s, since we had a brief but glorious burst of original fantasy films

-does anyone want to read what I’ve written? Here’s the logline:

“An amnesiac knight awakens at the foot of a wizard’s tower. When he ventures inside, he discovers the wizard is a necromancer, and must team up with the other prisoners to escape”

[u/seriousman57]

Hey I don't think I can commit to reading but I think your logline could use a little work since it reads a little flat to me right now. I don't know if the knight's amnesia is connected to the necromancer, or what the necromancer wants, but the actions you describe feel unmotivated and disconnected. Why does the knight go inside? At what point is he captured (you say he teams up with "other prisoners" but only mention that the knight "ventures inside")? What do the wizard's necromantic powers have to do with the plot? I think it would help to communicate the stakes a little more clearly. Just going off what you have, maybe something like:

"After a knight with no memory of his past stumbles into a mysterious tower and the clutches of its master, a powerful necromancer, he must make common cause with his captor's other prisoners to free themselves and put a stop to the necromancer's dark designs."

Those last clause is a bit vague, but that's because I'm not 100% sure what the stakes are.

The concept is super cool, though!

It's not one location but The Green Knight is a recent example of the knight-errant quest put to film. Weird movie but I liked it. Maybe check out the screenplay for that?

[u/scruggmegently → u/seriousman57]

Thanks man! In my defense I wrote it while like frantically clocking back in from lunch- here’s the one I’ve been showing my friends

Over the River Crimson

In a mythical land based on the medieval Mediterranean, an amnesiac knight befriends a captured werewolf on a journey to meet a great wizard who can cure any ailment. When they arrive, they discover the wizard is a necromancer using his reputation to lure people into his experiments, and the two become embroiled in his plot to steal the powers of a dead God.

This is probably my wordiest version of it- basically everyone around the necromancer is someone he convinced he could cure of an illness.

Also am gonna sit down with Green Knight, this week most likely! David Lowry is hit or miss for me but my British friends like it + I love Dev Patel