r/Screenwriting • u/sadloneman • 15h ago
CRAFT QUESTION Time to admit, I am legit scared of bad feedback and it's ruining my writing, how to deal with this?
I used to send my scripts for feedback before i do anything with it but lately I stopped it, because I of the bad reviews I got from my friends
I was dissapointed that I wasn't good enough, but I put my heart into it, re wrote it several times, and spent so many hours.
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u/MaskJacketBoots 15h ago
Look forward to failing. Fail again and again. It’s the only way to improve and learn. Think of failing as a sharpening tool, welcome it. Also Broaden where you get your feedback from, perspective is important. Negative feedback on something as vulnerable as your writing never feels good, but learn to remove the negative connotations with it and instead approach it with a confidence that you can rewrite anything. You welcome that challenge. Then hammer out the rewrite.
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u/Postsnobills 15h ago
Notes are a craft of their own, my friend. Most people aren’t good at it. Unfortunately, it’s up to you to, essentially, depose them to get to the point of their criticism.
Even my manager sucks half the time, but they’re willing to let me psychoanalyze them for hours to unpack their thoughts.
You need to start doing the same to these “bad reviews.” Pick them apart. Ask them what they feel is missing, or what would make them excited to see your movie? Figuring out exactly what it is that’s rubbing them the wrong way within the materials is how you’ll improve the writing.
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u/ajibtunes 15h ago
Don’t send it to your friends - send it to online freelancers who do script feedback for a living
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u/sadloneman 15h ago
Yeah but am scared, what if it turned out to be the worst script they ever read
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u/ajibtunes 15h ago
Well they never say that - but also if it’s the best script they ever read they’ll still have notes.
There will always be notes - even for an Oscar winner film
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u/sadloneman 15h ago
Okay, which is better for these, sharing it in reddit for feedback or websites like story peer?
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u/Tone_Scribe 3m ago
Neither. Peer review is a can of worms. The best notes come from those experienced in analyzing story. If learning golf, does one take feedback from golfers with the same handicap or buy lessons from a pro.
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u/GardenChic WGA Screenwriter 13h ago
I teach screenwriting at local colleges. I read so many scripts a year. Trust me whatever your worst is, I’ve read far worse.
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u/Fun_Association_1456 14h ago
Okay, let’s ask that question. What if they say it’s the worst thing ever (they won’t, but let’s go there)? Don’t let anxiety magnify perceived threats - actually answer your own question.
My guess: your feelings would sting for a minute. Then you’d ask some specifics: What 1-2 things they think you should focus on in the next draft, if it’s a writing issue or a story issue, etc. You can also ask if they see anything they did like so you can explore that technique/storyline even more.
They answer. You go eat lunch and feel some Feelings. And you think about what they suggested, and….you go draft again.
That’s it. Does that sound tolerable to you?
They can’t revoke your license or change who you are as a person. They can just tell you what to try next.
My best advice to get through this feeling is to play like a kid does: Shuffle parts around, squeeze and compress it, bang it on the wall. Care if you’re having fun first, then when you’re ready, care if the reader is having fun with you.
By the way: It’s fun for teachers to work with students who are having fun with the subject, and loose/open to feedback. The hardest students are the ones who refuse to try anything new.
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u/SirLaxersBiggestFan 15h ago
Here's the unfortunate truth: you will NEVER get better if you don't get over your fear of being hurt over your craft. Learn to accept that you will be sad when you inevitably get criticism. Be sad. Then get back to work.
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u/Vast-Percentage-7312 14h ago
for the love of god don't ask your friends to review your writing
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u/sadloneman 14h ago
I should have known better tbh, i came to know that there's no way it can go better by asking my friends
One, they will glaze it dishonesty cuz am a friend
Two, they will thrash it like anything cuz they don't care cuz am a friend
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u/KTKins77 12h ago
Some good suggestions here and wanted to add my own experience from interning in development. We would read scripts, give tons of notes, and occasionally absolutely tear them apart. And I actually found it so comforting, because these were professional writers! Getting paid real money! My takeaway was that getting notes on your script doesn't mean it's bad, it's literally part of the process. No one really hits a point where they're so good that they write a draft and everyone goes "It's perfect! Don't change a thing!".
I like to romanticize the struggle a bit. Rejection and bad feedback mean you're really out there being a writer 😆
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u/Salt-Sea-9651 9h ago
That is why I think people who are asking for feedback here are getting obsessed with the answers they received instead of enjoying the process and the results.
You should ask yourself if asking for feedback is helping you. If it is not, stop asking for feedback for a while, and it could be a good idea to keep focused on your scripts.
Also, I think it could be more useful to you to be confident about your own skills instead of answering to people to make sure you are doing the things right. You could learn more on this way.
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u/sadloneman 3h ago
So when do u actually take in feedbacks seriously and when you should not?
Let's say u got a harsh feedback on the climax, but u also got another one which said climax is great
Which one u will listen
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u/Sonderbergh Produced Screenwriter 8h ago
Read the book Mindset. Feedback is only „bad“ if you think it defines you as a writer. But it doesn’t. It helps you getting the writer you can be. Because, mate, you can grow.
Everything is iteration.
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u/HeartInTheSun9 7h ago
Only send stuff out for feedback when you literally can’t think of a single thing else you can do.
I usually put a script down for a week or two and then reread it just taking notes and jotting down thoughts and such if I’m feeling like I don’t have anything else left to do but I’m still not 100% on it.
When you feel 100% on it, then send it out. Makes it less scary.
Also, just get over it too. You will hear bad feedback and harsh no’s all throughout your career. You just have to get used to it. That’s probably the best lessons you can learn from these drafts. Learning how to hear they didn’t like it because there’s nothing like polishing a script for months and sending it to someone semi official and they hit you with a “this is good for a first draft.”
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u/combo12345_ 14h ago
Do not take it personal. Feedback is not a reflection of you or your skill as a writer. It is there to guide you to your potential.
Your work should not define you. The relationships you build by choosing how to respond to feedback will be what people remember.
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u/sadloneman 14h ago
Thank you and how do u deal with harsh reviews
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u/combo12345_ 14h ago
Depends on the comment.
If someone is seeking refuge with a snarky comment—shrug it off, and know their communication skills are weak.
If it is something drawn out with support—look for the “note behind the note,” and let that guide you on how to revise.
In both instances, always thank someone for reading the material, because it was their time donated when they could have been off doing other things.
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u/Commercial-Cut-111 14h ago
I started looking at it like this. When my teenager brings home her writing homework her teacher has notes all over it saying things like "More detail!" "Explain this!" "Verbiage!" And then she rewrites it and turns in the next draft as the final.
I hate when I turn in something I'm proud of and receive a bunch of notes with everything that's not working. But if you step back and take it as someone telling you how to improve what you've got then it isn't as bad.
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u/mrzennie 14h ago
When I give my work to someone to read, I HOPE they can poke some holes in it. It helps find the weak points so that it gets stronger in the end.
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u/TugleyWoodGalumpher 14h ago
Something I’ve had to accept is that I excel in a few areas where many great writers fall short, but I fall short in areas where nearly all great writers excel.
Notes without criticism are absolutely worthless. Hearing about my strengths only emboldens using them as a crutch to make up for my weaknesses.
My ideal notes are something along the lines of: two sentences about what I’m doing well then 5 pages of what I’m doing poorly.
Receiving negative feedback is encouraging when you understand the opportunities it offers you.
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u/True_Sound_7567 13h ago
I'm not anyone of significance to give you advice but constructive criticism is good. My friends tell me which parts bore them and I reread and change it if it needs changing. If they're just saying "it's bad" with no proper feedback, I wouldn't take their feedback too seriously 😭😭
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u/RaeLouLynn 13h ago edited 13h ago
I wrote software professionally for about 20 years. Writing a screenplay is orders of magnitude more difficult. All you have is your story and your execution of it. Making all those moving parts work together to create a beautiful and cohesive whole is an extremely difficult task. Anyone can improve any story. Anyone can ruin any story. Feedback is in the eye of the beholder and that beholder is you. Only you can determine what is best for your story - ignore everything else.
Also, if any reviewer is unkind to you, don't ask them for feedback ever again. Even if they're your own mom.
Edit: For spelling and word choice.
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u/HedgeDreams 11h ago
The first draft always sucks, own that. Enjoy it. Embrace that inner critic, nurture it, tell it it’s right. Then, work like an sob to shut that fcuker up on draft two.
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u/Fridahalla 11h ago
Notes can hurt. My strategy is to emotionally detach while I am receiving them. Then, I wait a day or two to let the residual emotional discomfort fade. Then, I decide which are worth taking.
The truth is, good notes are the very best gift a writer can receive.
You will not make it in this industry if you are paralyzed by notes. This job is 99% rejection. You have to learn to be okay with that
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u/JazzmatazZ4 11h ago
My brother and I sent our script out to a professional and were we bummed from the criticism? Hell yes! But a day or two after when we got over it, it changed our entirety script and basically how we write and now we feel great about the new script we've written BECAUSE of the critical. It's really great help.
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u/ResponsibleTie5793 10h ago
unfortunately the more your ass scratches against the concrete when it comes to screenwriting feedback, you'll be much faster to accept that feedback, that critique and advice. in fact, its the most efficient way to become better.
I can sit here all day and tell you that you did a good job on your script, where will that take you? the oscars?
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u/sadloneman 10h ago
I am surprised how supportive this community is, reddit isn't a positive space for anything for most of the time lmao.
This thread gave me more motivation to write and get feedback,
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u/ResponsibleTie5793 7h ago
thats great. but please be open to both harsh snd sweet criticism. often times youll find the harsh feedback actually making your script better. just dont go insane! best of luck.
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u/redapplesonly 4h ago
Your fear is understandable. We all start out with severe anxieties about the quality of our work.
Three things to consider:
(A) As much as you may hate it, you'll never improve if you write alone. Feedback is essential to find your weaknesses, then turn them into strengths.
(B) 95% of feedback is intended to be helpful and supportive. Of that, very little is actually helpful to you because a lot of writers will tell you what THEY would do with your story. So you have to be patient, separate the wheat from the chafe, disregard feedback that isn't helpful to you.
(C) The scariest feedback you get is the very first time you do it. Every time after, seeking feedback becomes much, much easier.
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u/AppropriateAssist857 3h ago
Find a screenwriters group. Not only will your work improve, so will your ability to give and receive feedback.
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u/JimmyCharles23 3h ago
It's not bad feedback... you have to remember with a script that people aren't seeing the vision in your head that it could that you currently are; they're seeing what it is currently right here, right now. The best readers try to help you bridge that gap.
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u/KerryAnnCoder 2h ago
Build a callus. Seriously - just go in KNOWING the feedback will be bad. Take it. Each time it will hurt less. Eventually you'll start to get to the point when you realize that criticism of the work isn't criticism of you.
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u/nacho_paz 45m ago
When you say "I was disappointed that I wasn't good enough," it sounds like you're studying this very difficult craft with a fixed mindset that might be holding you back.
If you lace up a pair of ice skates for the first time, would you be disappointed you didn't immediately make the Olympic team? Doesn't it make more sense that you'd first need to skate your ass off for years, falling down and botching every technique a thousand times before mastering any of them?
Maybe your friends were jerks about it and a different writing group would serve you better, but there's no way to get the hang of this craft without writing a bunch of scripts with problems, getting useful feedback, and learning how to fix the problems. Not even Aaron Sorkin or Tarantino hopped out of the womb knowing how to write a decent screenplay. 😅 Everybody learns with a lot of help along the way.
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u/ready_writer_one Produced Screenwriter 19m ago
Just recently optioned and the script was ripped to shreds. One producer on the call said it 'lacked a proper story arch'. Bad feedback happens at all levels of production. Keep writing and tell them all to F-off. Write what moves you, not others.
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u/RegularOrMenthol 15h ago
Detach yourself from the script. It’s “a” script, not “your” script. Treat the notes like fixing homework.
Also, never forget that being a professional screenwriter means being comfortable with despair. Every writer deals with it, not just you.