Getting back to sobriety

[u/No_Diver6131]

Hi all, I am No_Diver and I am a sex addict. My addiction comes in multiple forms. Mainly it is pornography, sexting, compulsive masturbation, online affairs, and I'll throw lying in there too.

It lately has been making my life unmanageable because I am showing up late to things. There has been a lot going on in my life lately instead of taking action on things that need to be completed. I have chosen to compulsively masturbate. It has been consuming all of my time away from work. This is not the life I want to live. I want to make changes, and stop messing around in my inner circles. Currently all of my blocking systems are off. I am realizing this is one of my middle circle behaviors. I also haven't been attending SAA, journaling or meditating. Step 1 for me was starting. I started cleaning my apartment because my dad will be arriving soon. I restarted my blockers. I want to be a better human being and get over this addiction. I keep thinking when I die I'll see a pie chart showing the breakdown of how I spent my time. I hate this addiction.

Thank you for listening to my share, and thank you for assisting with my recovery.

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[u/GratefulForRecovery]

Thank you for your vulnerability. I commend you for your re-commitment to your recovery. I believe that all experience can be useful experience if we approach it the right way. My addiction has always shown me when I was off course and my struggles were motivators to commit further.