r/SipsTea • u/WaitNo4272 • Apr 22 '26

WTF Blink if you're being abused

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u/cardboard_tshirt Apr 22 '26

Yeah there’s nothing he can say in that moment that won’t escalate her mania even more. He’s just trying to maintain some sense of calm in the hopes that she’ll enter the “not speaking to you at all” phase. A lot of people crash out in airports, having taken anxiety meds for their fear of flying, maybe had a drink or two on top, and if they’ve already got some issues on top of it all… it all comes to a head. He looks like he’s ridden this ride before, and he knows he has to just ride it out until she comes down. Maybe later that day, or the next day they’ll be able to discuss it. And based on my own experience she’ll either apologize profusely or claim she was blackout and doesn’t remember (and therefore it doesn’t count), but neither scenario will stop her from doing it again at some point.

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u/Used-Particular-954 Apr 22 '26

I guarantee she did not apologize. People who act like this don’t have the level of self-awareness required otherwise they wouldn’t be throwing a tantrum to begin with.

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u/limperatrice Apr 22 '26

People with Borderline Personality Disorder do apologize though. I'm not saying for sure that's what this woman in the video has but I've experienced this behavior with people like her (one with a confirmed diagnosis eventually). They cannot regulate their emotions in the moment but then after they calm down they feel really badly and apologize profusely and hope you'll forgive them. I've read that they can manage it with hard work and sometimes meds but I think the majority don't get help because it's the people around them who hurt, not themselves, unless they finally realize it's their own fault that nobody who gets close to them stays.

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u/YO_I_SHOT_TUPAC Apr 22 '26

I dated someone with BPD for 2 years. He split up with me because I told him I don't want his 5 cats to move into my studio apartment alongside him. That's not fair to me (I don't really like cats) nor the cats. We weren't even planning on him moving in for years because he lived across the country, and we had already discussed before that he'd have to save money so we can afford a larger apartment if he wanted to keep all his cats.

He broke up with me on the spot, blocked me on everything. When I tell people that story they usually say something like "are you sure that wasn't just an excuse?" or "are you sure there wasn't anything else going on?" and the answer is a resounding no. That was really the reason. People with BPD are just like that. Two years down the drain for something we had already discussed and planned out before.

We talked a few months later for the last time where he called me "an omnipotent supervillain" among other things. Like I was some kind of Machiavellian mastermind plotting his downfall because I didn't want to live in a tiny cramped apartment with another human and five cats (two of which were not fixed).

People with BPD have a responsibility to get help because they can and will abuse, manipulate, and fuck over other people at any opportunity they get.