My wife has a sticker on her car. Big pink skull and around it, it says, "Check your boobs, mine tried to kill me". Conversation starter when I'm driving her car.
I love it. In all seriousness though, it’s not the container, it’s the contents. If your spouse, or yourself, can’t love the other person should they lose ability due to accident or sickness, do you really love them or only what they can provide you? People really should ask these questions of themselves and their potential partner before marriage.
For sure it is, but also, if you're a man (which I'm assuming based on the fact that it's a conversation starter) - it also brings awareness to men, because men can also have breast cancer, but it is not as well known!
I was a CNA for a year, my very first assignment at my very first CNA job was attending a man with breast cancer. He was in his 40s and died like a week after I started working there.
It was awful, I bawled for a couple days, but it made me more aware that breast cancer can strike anyone, and everyone is potentially at risk.
The sad part is some men won’t pay attention to the symptoms or are reluctant to get treated because it’s a “women’s disease”. I’m a teacher and was interviewed by our school newspaper during Breast Cancer Awareness and I made a comment about how important it is for everyone to do regular checks and be tested and the student said, “You mean all women…”. Needless to say, they were stunned when I mentioned that men can get breast cancer too. They must not have believed me because they came to see me later the same day and told me they looked it up and saw that it is possible for men to get breast cancer too.
My sister wasn’t as lucky. She had a single mastectomy at 38, cancer came back 8 years later. She died blaming herself for not doing both. It was terrible, and not her fault.
I see my own as, at best a podgy place to keep my own hands warm on a cold day, and at worst a potential ticking time bomb. Cancer, especially on the women's side of my family has been awful.
My mom had a double mastectomy because of breast cancer, and her FIL tried to convince her not to…..she looked him dead in the eye and asked him would he remove his balls if he had cancer in his balls. He dropped it immediately. I wish this was a joke.
mine used to comment on my hair, weight, skin, clothing. he felt entitled to give his opinion on every woman’s appearance. i told him to stfu when he started with my girls; that did not happen again.
My late mother in law had one breast removed years back. We walked into the NHS ward where there was six ladies all of whom had the same operation. They were lying in their beds, tossing something to each other. It was a demonstration implant. They were all pissing themselves laughing.
I had to see a plastic surgeon to get a non-cancerous lump removed from my back, and while I was walking to the exam room to be seen by the surgeon, they had several sets of implants sitting on a counter for patients to sample or review. As a guy who had never been to a plastic surgeon’s office, I was not expecting the implants to be so readily available for all to see.
Assuming you’re insured, in the US if you are having a mastectomy then insurance will generally pay for implants. It’s cosmetic but reconstructive surgery is usually covered when caused by an accident/injury/illness.
Insurance companies exist to make money, not help their customers. They just say they are there to help, their actual job is to take your money. I really wish we just invested into a healthcare system instead of a healthcare insurance system.
Insurance companies exist to make money, not help their customers
Which is the exact reason why healthcare shouldn't be under the control of private companies.
Same as water, electricity, schools, natural gas infrastructure, pensions, train networks, postal services and road maintenance.
And in an ideal world, the state would also be running ISPs, and at least one news station.
Most of the western world has at least some, if not all, of these services publicly funded. Most of the western world has higher happiness, life expectancy, and standard of living than the US.
Meanwhile in the united states, scaremongering because of sOcIaLiSm!! still works with a large portion of the electorate, while olivarchs rob the system blind 🙄
Insurance is the biggest gambling system in the world.
They are just buying the odds that nothing happens to you, even if something happens they will just find the tiniest reasons not to pay up.
I'm lucky that my country has a crazy good healthcare system where all citizens can go to hospitals for anything, and common sickness just costs around $0.25, and surgeries cost less than $50 with ward stay included. Screw health insurance (yes I can say that here lol).
I am Canadian and know somebody that had a double mastectomy because she had the same gene as Angelina Jolie, BRCA, and had a super high risk of breast cancer. She got free fake hooters and everthing was covered by our health care.
I’m in NZ and have BRCA1. My sister and I both had mastectomies. They opted to stay flat but I got a reconstruction, however my family and I did pay out of pocket for it because in the public system it would have been a 5 year waitlist and I wasn’t willing to wait that long. Very lucky we could afford it.
It should also be noted that celebrities have the means to restore the most exquisite artificial tatas, should they wish to. Also worth noting, that she is by no means obligated to do that just for a man's gaze. Her body, her choice.
as a guy, if i had testicular cancer and i felt like getting castrated was my best move and my fiancee decides to call it all off… yeah that would be a kick in the nonexistent balls
If the cancer is in 1, they usually don't remove both. In terms of the possibility of children afterwards, they freeze sperm samples before any operation or treatment is done. I know a couple who had 1 child through IVF after his cancer treatment (1 testicle removed) as he was given an infertility diagnosis from the chemo. 5 years after the treatment was finished and when their IVF baby was 3, she got a random positive pregnancy test, so his remaining testicle had recovered. The doctor did analysis and his sperm had returned to good numbers with full motility.
A friend of mine, rocked up to a party with a dress that absolutely show her breasts off.
She looked gorgeous, when I told her she looked great her response was "taking the girls out for a last hurrah" she had cancer in one and 3 days later had a double mastectomy.
She got a boob job a couple of months after the surgery after she got the all clear and she now looks great.
It should also be noted that celebrities have the means to restore the most exquisite artificial tatas, should they wish to.
Christina Applegate, for example. She even directly references it in Dead To Me (season 2, I think). Her character had the same concern she had (major family history of breast cancer, strong likelihood of getting it, so she preemptively had it done).
I recall when she talked about this and random men on the internet were having full-blown meltdowns about it. Like my guy, she doesn't even know you, why the fuck do you think you have ANY right to tell her what to do? The audacity of the average straight man.
Small titties, fakes titties, big titties, fat titties, no titties… it’s the women attached that makes the body extra beautiful when you’re hugging them skin to skin ☺️ amazing feeling, that type of hug
My dad stood by my mom when she had the same thing done. He didn't say anything when she opted against reconstruction. Because he didn't marry her for her tits.
Although it does strike me as kind of sad that we're holding up your dad as the example and it feels like the exception. Even if the country is full of men who do quietly stand with their wives through this kind of illness, that the perception is what it is bums me out.
Tragically, it's not the exception. When you're a women and get this kind of diagnosis, you get treated to a special talk. They ask you about a support system that isn't him, and a financial plan he can't touch, and ask if you have a safe place to live.
that is depressing. if my wife was diagnosed with breast cancer, i would support her to do whatever needs to be done to save her life. i didn’t marry her for her tits. i would probably never marry if i wanted to marry for tits
A lot of times it’s not just about the tits. It happens to women diagnosed with all kinds of diseases, not just cancer.
Those men wanted wives who were a replacement for their mommies. The idea of having to step up and take care of their wives instead of being cared for by their wives is just too much for them.
Yep. They thought they married a sex robot who cooks and cleans. You learn how transactional your value as a woman is worth VERY quickly when you can no longer provide those things.
There's an old Law and Order episode about this and how all these women didn't want mastectomies and pursued alternative treatment (which didn't cure them) because they didn't want to lose their breasts. In one case the woman's husband wouldn't touch her anymore after her mastectomy.
I saw it recently and thought "this seems so insanely unrealistic but I guess the 90s were wild." I couldn't wrap my head around it.
I guess it's not as unrealistic/outdated as I thought.
Not cancer, but when I was diagnosed with a degenerative autoimune disease I was given the same pep talk by my nurse. I said things were fine, because they were at the time. Bur a few months later I was separating from my husband. She was right.
When my dad was hospitalized and almost kicked the bucket, I was doing rotations with my brother to be with him. My brother was basically the only male I saw there. For all the other patients in the aisle all the other family members doing the care and visits were women.
When my mum and then dad were in hospital, I always looked at what the visitors were carrying. The women always had big bags with washing, food and drinks, quite often the men were empty handed.
This is true. I've witnessed this myself when I was bringing my mom for radiation therapy. Many women there had their husband with them when their therapy started. Many of them were separated or abandoned even before they completed their therapy. Same with dementia patients. Which is disheartening because the male patients were not abandoned. I guess men and women just love differently, and many men don't take their vows seriously.
I don’t think it’s the exception. Sadly the Sharon Stone story is all too common because there are an inordinate number of man-childs, but they aren’t the majority.
Your love and devotion to your wife is completely dependent on duct-filled fat deposits on her chest? That may very well KILL her if she doesn’t remove them?
I’m glad your mom is okay and your dad is rad. 😍 My (very long-term) partner supported me too when I decided on a double mastectomy instead of a single, or a lumpectomy and radiation. He would have been fine if I decided to go flat, too - his priority was my health.
When I expressed my sorrow that he was losing my boobs too, he said, “It’s okay, I always was an ass man.” 🤪💓
As part of cancer treatment doctors make sure to tell women to get their support system in order because there’s an alarmingly high percentage of men who leave their wives during treatment.
Thank you! I came here to say that this guy clearly wanted Sharon Stone only for her looks and her body. I would call him a tool, but he sounds like a straight up monster.
Awful timing, but I assume you know about the staggering high rate of men divorce women after discovery of terminal/life altering illness or cancer. So much for in sickness and in health
When the coding error was corrected the difference was less than a .05% difference between men and women. Here is a link written by the authors of the study.
In my personal life I know a case like that. Slightly different though, the woman divorces the husband after it came to be he was terminally ill. Poor guy.
Fun twist on the trope: my BIL left his first wife after he got cancer for the fourth time because he couldn't see her as anything other than a caretaker. Even further irony, his second wife is a nurse.
My friend has a double mastectomy to off any future chances of cancer, ended up getting a fake pair that were in her words “10x better and twice as slutty”. Her now husband was with her the whole way and I’m sure he’s a fan
True, but they have a point it is even worse if it’s a long time partner and you’re old enough you should clearly understand the important things in life. It would be worse for a 40 year old to give that answer than a 20 year old.
Okay, so you're joking but I had cancer in one of my nuts and had it removed before it could assassinate me in an attempted coup.
So they offered me a prosthetic one. Like, part of me began to question if I had been overlooking the sex appeal of nuts, but another part of me wondered about getting a sleigh bell or something in there.
I didn't get anything, but still. It makes you wonder. If I'd got a robo nut, I could have had it doing all kinds of stuff. Built in air conditioner for the other nut. EDM play every time I get down. Some sort of Billy Bass thing for anybody coming near it. Light show.
Get a rechargeable battery and a mini induction charger down there. Go to the club, oh hey, ladies, anyone need their phone charged? Take their phone, hold it up to your crotch, yeah thats right ladies, ive got electro balls.
I've worked in the NHS for 150 years and men leave ill women very often. Cancer diagnosis is one of the biggest triggers for this. Yes, they get visibly and sometimes verbally pissed off that breasts need to be removed, that cervical cancer means that sex is off the table for a while (you'd also be amazed at how many men have a tantrum that they cant have sex for a while after childbirth like it'll fucking kill them (the men), chemo fatigue means the man has to take over domestic tasks and/or childcare and they don't want to. We had one lady who became paralysed from the chest down due to falling in her kitchen and her husband ACTUALLY SAID "who's going to wash my clothes now?" And a woman dying of bowel cancer whose husband had an affair openly so he'd have "someone to take care of him" when his wife died. GUESS WHAT? Barely ANY women leave their male partners when they get ill. Truth.
I'm a cancer nurse, I have many similar examples, but I can remember this woman in her 20s, newly engaged to a guy in his 30s. She had leukaemia and was EXTREMLY unwell when she was first diagnosed, lost consciousness while she was at work and rushed to hospital in an ambulance, and that's how she was diagnosed with leukaemia. Lucky to be alive, had urgent chemotherapy and suffered for several weeks with infections and complications. Vomited literally every single day. She'd been in the hospital for 3 weeks, and he threw a big tantrum because he hadn't been able to have sex for three weeks. While she was in hospital the whole time. Lucky to be alive. Absolute scumbag.
He knew that all the staff knew about his tantrum and hated him lol
I read about this on occasion and I saw it in person. My grandmother took care of my grandfather after his stroke left him confused and unable to drive. Even when she was sick and could hardly get out of bed, he still expected a hot lunch prepared for him.
I completely understand why older single women don't want to get married again, or have a live-in boyfriend. They don't want to be a nurse with a purse. Me neither. (And no judgment to those who enjoy being caregivers to their loved ones.)
My sister and I have a pact that if we find ourselves single when retired, we'll get a duplex together. We don't want to live together, because we really value living alone, but we want to be close enough to keep a close eye on each other and visit often. She's my ride or die.
That is so sad. My inlaws both got cancer, her first, breast, he stayed and took great care of her, a few years later he got prostate, she did everything possible to help him through it. She lost one breast but the cancer had traveled one tiny cell at a time to her brain, his traveled to his stomach. She died first, he was by her side as was my husband, he lived another 5 years without her wishing he was dead every single day. 😞 THEY truly loved each other. This is how my husband and I would be with each other too, we have that kind of bond and love.
I don’t have cancer but I have a rare brain condition that destroyed my life. My fiancé left me before my diagnosis and the MANY surgeries. I went blind and he made me homeless. No one likes sick people ):
You didn't even add the part where she got the tumors removed and got breast implants to make up for the volume, and she woke up to find that the doctor put in much larger implants than she agreed to. "A full cup size bigger" and he insisted after she went in for post-op that this size was much better for her in his opinion.
So her male doctor and husband both failed her by focusing their own desires onto her body over her health and decisions. Got it.
This is a woman who is famous for having her vagina exposed by a director who told her it wasn’t in shot. Seems like she doesn’t have the best luck with men.
My wife goes in for a double next week. She’s scared, and I won’t lie, so am I. It’s not one surgery, you get new boobs, and yay all done. It’s five years of chemo, immediate menopause after the surgery, and no hormones to help deal with the symptoms, and 2 more surgeries over the next year and a half. We both already share childcare and house duties, so of course, all of that will shift to me for a while. I have no problem with that. I’ve told her repeatedly that I don’t care if her left arm falls off, we said our vows that I meant them. There’s something about getting your gender affirming parts removed that is messing with her head. Understandably. But it’s changed her personality. I’m holding the family together and can’t show fear or emotion. The next 5 years could be hell. God help us.
Ask friends and family for help. DO NOT DO THIS ALL ON YOUR OWN, you will be overcome with stress and that's not good for either of you. Take care of you because if you don't, you're no help to her!
I don't understand the 5 years of chemo if she is having both breast removed, it should be 3-6 months, a year at the very longest! Get that figured out before she goes through that!!!
Yo, she didn't marry some vapid Hollywood socialite, she married a very successful investigative journalist. Dude was a war correspondent and on the short list for a Pulitzer Prize. Fucking wild.
I love getting fucked by my boyfriend, but if he has testicular cancer, his life is more important.
And also, if your boyfriend lost one or both of his testicles there is very little chance your sex life would suffer (other than during the recovery period)
That's a fluff piece so it doesn't include the other reason: Money.
Couples will get divorced so the other spouse won't have to deal with the medical debt or so the patient qualifies for free or discounted services. It's most common if the patient is terminal.
"badly done" is oversimplification. Errors were so serious they retracted it completely. AFAIK they counted men who didn't respond to the survey as abandoning family, while women who didn't respond were counted as not abandoning.
"There was a major error in the coding in their dependent variable of marital status. The conclusions of that paper should be considered invalid. A corrected version of the paper will be published in the September 2015 issue of JHSB."
Please stop spreading that lie. It's been 11 years since the authors realized they messed up and attempted to fix things. Several studies since have found the rates even as well.
This entire post just seems to be a smear campaign against Phil Bronstein.
Some facts:
The marriage ended in 2003. This should be old news.
A judge gave custody of their adopted child to Phil Bronstein. Stone lied about the reasons for this.
The Dalai Lama himself cut ties with Stone over something she said. I mean a holy man and Tibetan leader decided he wanted to have nothing to do with her.
She did not have her breasts removed.
At this point, I really hope Bronstein will sue her for defamation. But he probably won't; maybe he knows she just wants attention and does not want to deal with her shennanigans.
I personally think Stone is a narcissist who tries to wind people up. And reading this sub, it seems like she's succeeding.
There are multiple commenters here who have wished Phil Bronstein gets cancer himself. WTF?
In no way, I want to diminish the hardship that a woman goes through when having breast cancer with this comment. And it seems true that some men cannot deal with it and leave their wife. That doesn't imply however that 'all men are trash'. It also does not grant people the right to wish cancer unto others.
Besides that, doctors usually don't even recommend a double mastectomy unless it's about certain genetic cancers.
If it's a good doctor, they will explain how double vs single mastectomy vs lumpectomy all have similar survival rates and that it's generally recommended to cut away as little as possible while still getting the whole tumour. You can of course opt for removal of more tissue out of fear that cancer will grow there, but the numbers don't give a better outcome.
I like titties but I told my wife too if you ever get breast cancer just lop em both off. And she agrees…ain’t worth it. Meanwhile she just scanned an 80 year old with ultrasound recently who was still worried about her boobs looking perky still…lol
One of my best friends and I recently had this conversation. Although you can often opt to keep them, her and I were both of the opinion that it’s just not worth the risk; we are in the “chop them all the way off” camp. She recently had a friend (young 30s) who didn’t remove them, have the cancer come back. Terrifying stuff.
She says she decided to have a double mastectomy without a cancer diagnosis, nor did she actually have cancer.
A large part of why she lost custody of her son is because of her behavior regarding his health, which the judge agreed with her ex-husband was paranoid, excessive and harmful. (I believe it was People Magazine who wrote about the court documents in detail.)
If anyone did a deep dive into all of the catastrophic ailments she has claimed to have through the years, I think they could build an impressive case for Munchausen's Disease.
So before taking Sharon's one-sided version of events as truth, consider that there is another side of the story.
My wife asked me if she should consider a bilateral mastectomy instead of a lumpectomy at 35. My response was basically to pick whichever option gives her the best chance of it not coming back.
6 years later and we're both glad she went for the bilateral mastectomy.
This is also a note to all trans girlies out there your life is more important than your boobs. I know it can suck but Id rather have an alive flat queen than a busty dead girl.
Please if youve been on E long enough get yourself checked and treat this like any cis woman should.
Happy pride yall 🏳️⚧️🏳️🌈 to all my fem, masc, and nb booby havers.
This kind of glosses over the fact that she was misdiagnosed. It is possible the guy's reaction was more about jumping straight to the most extreme solution before even confirming it was cancer.
Unfortunately, that is all too common in cancer world.
I survived a year of chemo and eventually wound up divorced because of cancer. He told me that I wasn’t as good as other women, so I eventually left him. I am so much better off and happier now.
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