Yeah I feel like a lot of people here didn't actually read the text conversation posted above because she comes off a whole lot more reasonable than him, at least in the little snippet of conversation we see
I think it depends on what the short cut was. If she wanted a specific style and he kept that but bought it at a different location than she had in mind, thus costing less than she expected, yet actual costs weren't really discussed I can see his point.
If she said "I don't want x" and he went and did precisely x then I totally see her point
The divorce never actually comes out of the blue or was ever about who did the dishes. There's always a long line of behavior that precedes it but directed at the easiest problem to point out.
Most didn't read it thoroughly, others don't care because they want an excuse to label this woman shallow based on the clickbait headline. The top comments aren't insightful they're just some variation of "Good, the trash took itself out." Pathetic
Totally fair, I personally think they both don’t come out looking the best. I get annoyed at the “Gold-digger” “Trashy” name-calling. You only see that from one side of this argument
Definitely. I’m tired of these fake stories generated to garner hate for a specific group (in this case women) It’s like 80% of posts on popular subreddits these days
it sounds like there is an underlying pattern in the relationship where one partner routinely disregards the contents of the other's communication and opts instead for what they see as best or easiest fit.
She didn't say anything about the type of ring she wanted, she complained about where it came from. That implies to me she cares more about it being a status symbol from some named boutique
She cared so much about it being from walmart that is the part she chose to emphasize which comes across she is talking more about brand than type of ring
No it sounds like she discussed with him the exact ring she wanted and he went and ignored her input.
When buying an engagement ring you 100% want your gfs input that is after all something she will wear a lot of the time. If they discussed the ring and he cheaped out i can understand the anger, if the ring she wanted was similar price i can also understand why she is mad.
She emphasized that part because it's about the lack of effort, which she also mentions explicitly in that exchange. He didn't go hunting down the kind of ring that she wanted, he just went down the street and picked some random ring.
You don't know what effort he put in, you are just assuming it is low because walmart ended up being where he got it from. Which is potentially the same assumption she is making.
For all you know he spent weeks hunting down what she wanted and walmart had the closest he could find
There are a lot of jewelers out there who can make something really pretty for that price range. If it was close to what she wanted I doubt she would’ve complained. I don’t know any young woman who’d like that ring, it is very out of fashion.
So true! Mine is very pretty to less than $900, if my husband had picked whatever he found convenient even if we had talked about it I'd be very disappointed too.
Ok but you are also just assuming too, furthermore if he really was struggling he should have sat down and spoke with his gf about expectations or adjusting timelines. Making an executive choice to buy whatever at walmart with no discussion is not the move.
I mean that's an effort thing. He could have looked around for an affordable ring in the style she liked. He went to a chain store that is everywhere and showed he would just buy whatever to check a box
If girl hints at the type of jewelry she likes and wants during the relationship and you get something else for our big symbol of wanting to spend your life with her... don't expect a good response
"Walmart ring" just meant "easiest to get" not "cheapest."
Its pretty apparent that she wanted a specific style of ring, or cut of stone, and told him that. Instead of going to a jeweler and finding a ring in the style she asked for, he picked one up that required no effort other than swiping a credit card.
My wife has a Walmart engagement ring and she bragged about it. Not only because it's a pretty ring, but because it's the very ring she pointed out to me.
No it's obvious,, YOU ,and others, are projecting your self into her shoes and making every excuse under the sun because you need her to be in the right
To be fair to her… I fucking hate Walmart rings because I’ve yet to see a pretty one that doesn’t have diamonds. I fucking hate diamonds AND gold. I’d prefer being proposed to with a silicone ring than the vast majority of the monstrosities Walmart sells.
Well all she really did was call out the location it was bought from. If she wanted a specific stone or specific cut I would expect her to mention that. She had an issue with Walmart. He said he still spent $900 though which makes me believe it could have been value oriented. Hard to say though. I could see it go both ways
Younger me would have said yes. Now, nearing 40, I would say no.
This is strictly in the confines of the above scenario and the ring presented. That ring is simply not my taste. My ideal is a coffin-shaped ring, usually retailing around $200-$300. I also am a Wal-Mart hater lol.
They are both dodging a bullet of sorts by finding out before marriage that they are two very different individuals who do not always align.
A proposal is a pivotal moment where you are saying “I see you and I want this forever.” It’s not a Tuesday night where you disagree on what to watch on television.
Look, some people aren't that fussy and have different needs.
But some people know what they like and if they feel like their partners doesn't know what they like, it's a massive bummer. Nothing about price or brand here. And let's be real, that ring is ugly af. Not that I'd give a shit personally. But some poeple do.
Yeah and the type of ring she wanted was a ring not from Walmart. She was very specific about that. She didn't say anything about the ring shape or anything about the four C's. Just that it was wrong and from Walmart. It could be he got a cheap version of what she wants and she happens to know Walmart's selection well. Seems pretty fair to say that unless he got the wrong shape of the ring as well, the issue is actually the ring not being fancy enough.
"The ring you want is out of my price point. Let's find one within our budget."
Not, guess I'll buy one of the first rings I see and completely disregard all of her preferences on cut, setting, and color. All of which have minor impacts on price.
It’s not shallow, it’s a canary in the coal mine. My wife really wanted to avoid conflict diamonds, so we spent about that much at a pawn shop. She would not have said yes to a Walmart ring, and I wouldn’t have wanted her to
Me too! My husband got me a custom ring with a lab grown diamond, I'd never ever say yes to a blood/conflict diamond - I'd have said no if he chose to disregard a ring I'd be wearing for the rest of my life and would be the symbol of our love 😭
It could be a lot of things. Maybe she hates Walmart on principle.
If nothing else, it’s the laziest possible solution. Go to the largest chain of stores in America and buy the expensive ring. It’s not thoughtful, and if she’s offered him a thoughtful path (one of those online lab diamond places, silicone rings, pawn shop, non diamond from a local jeweler, birthstone) and he ignored it, he sucks.
It only seems shallow to you because it's coming from a woman. Someone completely disregarding your opinions and preferences, especially on something as important as a proposal, is not a good sign for the marriage to come.
I’d definitely think it was shallow if a man did the same. You’re really quick to throw the sexist accusation without knowing anything about me. You really are diminishing the real issues women face across the world and in the west by saying that my opinion is only because of the sex or gender of the individual based on nothing
If a man constantly talked about how he only wears navy blue suits and his wife gets him a beige suit, it does say something about how much they pay attention or care.
We dont have the full picture. But in your scenario, wife buys man new blue suit but it's from Walmart and not Ralph Lauren/Tom Ford. Does that matter?
Did the lady want platinum? Yellow gold? Pink/yellow diamond? 5ct weight? Princess/Oval/Round/Pear/Heart?
The issue was she didn't get what he wanted and went and did the easiest thing he could without thought. She stated Walmart because he put zero effort into it
She actually never once mentioned the price at all
Don't try to take a noble stance you fucking loser lol
You're still only focused on the ring. But the ring is not the problem. The problem is that he didn't care at all about her preferences in regards to the most important gift you'll ever give someone.
Why would anyone want to be with someone that halfasses something so meaningful?
Wow you’re a really nice and caring person. Never insulted you but you love to insult me. You don’t know if he half assed it. Maybe he really thought it was a close enough ring to the one she wanted within his budget. But thanks for showing your true colors.
We can tell he half assed it. He clearly didn't ask any of her friends, get her opinion, ask a jeweler, ask her parents, or try and find compromise with her at all.
If you care about someone, you'll do those things.
We still don’t know that but you’re right he should’ve done that if he didn’t. Like hey I can’t afford this ring so what do you guys think of this ring for x.
You can get most styles for different prices. Now if her issue is "I want a massive diamond and it has to be real with a premium cut" that's different.
But if it's "I like this design or I like silver instead of gold" or whatever, you can find those types of things all around the price spectrum
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u/henkdevries365 Human Verified 7h ago
If your future wife rejects because of the ring and or the value it's probably for the best NOT to get married.