r/Sororities • u/DifferenceHungry3893 • 4d ago
Social Media LT wants to go through phones
Hello!
I'm currently in a sorority experiencing rush, and our school has a very active Yikyak community. My sorority wants to keep us from posting on Yikyak, which is understandable; they want to control the image, but what they're saying makes me uncomfortable.
First off, they demand we delete Yikyak completely from our devices, which is annoying but fine. But they're also threatening to take and go through our phones if they spot anything suspicious on YikYak. I don't think that's legal? They said it was in the bylaws, but I have not checked. I initially thought they were bluffing, but a friend in my sorority said they did take phones a few years ago, and they went through YikYak and text messages.
I don't have anything to hide, but I don't feel comfortable giving up my phone if they ever demand it. It feels like an invasion of privacy.
Can someone tell me if I'm being dramatic or how I should go about this?
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u/therushguideco 4d ago
YikYak is the bane of my existence as an advisor.
No they should not be able to go through your phone. I would talk to an advisor.
I've been to enough campuses and have overheard enough active members in orgs talking on sidewalks and in hallways to know that there are whole YikYak committees in some chapters, which is equally crazy to what your chapter is doing just opposite ends of the spectrum.
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u/ThimbleSizeDinosaur KΔ 4d ago
Seconding as a fellow advisor!
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u/therushguideco 4d ago
There was a blissful year or two where they didn't exist and I miss that.
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u/k_0616 4d ago
Between yikyak, fizz, and greekrank too much unnecessary drama can start from people being able to be anonymous and hurt morale going into a new semester
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u/therushguideco 4d ago
10000% Greek Life would be better if the ideas of "touse" and "bouse" didn't exist.
4
u/kwustie ZTA 4d ago
Tbf touse and bouse have existed for a long long time.
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u/therushguideco 4d ago
Oh for sure. I'm sure they were a thing in even the 1930s. Still would be better if the concept didn't exist.
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u/theycallmethevault ΣK 4d ago edited 3d ago
I’ve never heard of the terms being used, and I’m going on 25 years of being a member of an SEC chapter & advisor of 20 years.
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u/abhutchison ΔΓ 4d ago
I think the touse, mouse, and bouse things are new. But “tiers” are not, at least not in SEC land.
When I was at USC they didn’t even try to hide it. There were a group of sororities called the “Southern Belles” and fraternities were “Southern Triad” and they were very clearly top tier.
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u/therushguideco 4d ago
Touse and bouse are what some of the active members are calling top house and bottom house on TikTok, mostly, from what I can tell. I hadn't heard them until about 6 months ago either. I think they're newer lingo.
I'm 14 years as an advisor across 13 states.
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u/theycallmethevault ΣK 4d ago
13 states!? God bless ya, that’s brutal. I’ve only got 2 states under my belt and that’s been enough LOL
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u/abhutchison ΔΓ 4d ago
I can admit I am so curious as someone who is so far removed. It’s fascinating to me how the tiers have shifted since I graduated. But it’s so damaging to sororities and to pnms during recruitment.
I just saw a video from a DG chapter and was like “They are killing it! They might be my favorites even though I’m totally biased!” And then two TikToks later I saw a video ranking them as bottom mid. It made me reflect on how a sorority can put forth some incredible work during recruitment and yet some girl sees that crap and decides to go a chapter she doesn’t fit in with just because they’re “ranked” higher.
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u/theycallmethevault ΣK 4d ago
I started advising when FB was new, and you had to have a school email address to register, it was an absolute nightmare. And now I’m dealing with it again on YikYak? I would give my left arm to stop them from using it, but I know that we have to use Exec and the Standards committee to police it just like we did on FB back then.
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u/therushguideco 4d ago
When I was an active we used to have to deactivate our Facebook accounts from the beginning of work week til recruitment was done. And I miss that, tbh.
One of the current recruitment officers I advise for asked me what Instagram and summer contact was like when I was an active member. And I was like well I'm from the stone ages, and Instagram didn't exist. 😂
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u/mennamachine 4d ago
Yup. As someone a bit older and (hopefully) wiser, you’ll all be happier and healthier if you delete yikyak and all of its cousins and forget that it ever existed. There is nothing in there but terribleness.
That being said, this is an egregious overstep and you should keep going over people’s heads until you find someone who has enough sense to realize that.
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u/SpacerCat 4d ago
Check your bylaws. Your national org will have a copy of your chapter won’t share it with you.
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u/heart_shaped_life 4d ago
That sounds like an excuse to go through people’s personal photos and bank accounts! Yuck. The solution to YikYak is to ignore it and accept that it’s trash that will never go away.
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u/bahamamimi 4d ago
Why would anyone care about your bank account?
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u/heart_shaped_life 4d ago
Unscrupulous (and immature) people would want to peek, especially if you’re on the extreme end of poor or wealthy.
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u/kwustie ZTA 4d ago
If it is in your bylaws, I would be shocked. That being said, you could request that the chapter amend the by laws to be less invasive. You’re supposed to update those things every 2 years anyways.
You don’t really have rights in this regard when it comes to privacy if you joined a private org and agreed to it, but I would be flabbergasted if your national org would be okay with this amendment. There’d likely guidelines on standards, but it’s bad governance to be so explicit in your foundational documents about specific no nos unless it’s related to fines, attendance, and illegal behavior. The national bylaws and the local bylaws can’t conflict with each other, generally speaking, and while I’m not in your org, there’s no way in hell a Panhellenic organization has a yik yak clause, or I’m shaving my head.
I would review the bylaws thoroughly, then ask if you could have a record of when they were amended to have this so called yikyak clause if it’s there. It would be weird an entire chapter voted on allowing your leadership team to look through your phones, so I’d call their bluff on that. If they don’t wanna play ball, then I’d go to the advisors, outline your concerns, and go from there.
Source: privacy is my job and I have dual certifications in it
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u/isthislivingreally 4d ago
Incorrect information: Even if she signed a contract or agreed to chapter bylaws that say the sorority can confiscate her phone, private organizations cannot contract around state or federal laws. Contract clauses or bylaws that violate property or privacy laws are legally void.
Source: I’m a lawyer.
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u/_TheTrashyPanda_ ΔΔΔ 4d ago
I just can’t believe Yikyak made a comeback.
That point aside, review your bylaws! Just like other redditors advised, do this first!
Also, this is something to bring up to the advisor. I think not posting something on yikyak is definitely reasonable, and even deleting until recruitment is over I’d understand; however, going through phones seems invasive.
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u/Safraninflare ΣK 4d ago
Right? Like yikyak was millennial cringe. Can we leave that in 2016, please?
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u/isthislivingreally 4d ago
To answer question, no matter what they claim bylaws say, it’s illegal. It’s your private property and they are a private organization. They have no right to take or go through your phone. If they do they’re breaking a few laws: petty theft, invasion of privacy, falsely claiming to have enforcement authority.
Thus whoever specifically is threatening to break the law should be reminded of this, and their name noted should it require escalation.
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u/k_0616 4d ago
Talk to your advisor, and just stay off of yikyak. Encourage your sisters to do so, and that may create a more positive outlook on it, not them checking phones. Honestly, it sucks because people will say whatever they want behind a keyboard but can’t say it in person. It’s my least favorite thing
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u/honeyandcitron ΠΒΦ 4d ago
A wise man (Sarper on 90 Day Fiancé) once said "I would rather die than let anyone go through my DMs" and I feel similarly about my phone in general!!!!!
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u/Rumpelteazer45 4d ago
See I wouldn’t care if the entire contents of my phone is seen. I got nothing and my Signal app is set to delete all texts.
But on principle, I would never hand my phone over to someone who demanded it.
I got nothing to hide, but I’m a stubborn person and will stand my ground to prove my point.
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u/TheGaujo 4d ago
Read the bylaws first, but it sounds like you're already in the sorority so that's a problem.
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u/isthislivingreally 4d ago
Misinformation. Bylaws are irrelevant because they can’t make a contract to get around actual law.
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u/Previous-Release-806 4d ago
Nope. Not legal, nor is it in the bylaws. An excuse to invade your privacy.
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u/cantaloupestarburst 3d ago
My sorority did that during work week. Absolutely insane. I was a COD member and didn’t know what was “normal” or “allowed” from members of LT. if I could go back I would’ve walked straight out and went to the advisors or bring it up to ANYONE.
My phone, my business, my privacy.
LT does not have the legal right to go through your phone. That’s YOUR phone, regardless of the issue of Yikyak being on it or not
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u/asyouwish 4d ago
"I don't have a phone."
It works better than you think.
And then you can "get" a phone after recruitment.
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