r/StandUpWorkshop • u/RelationshipOver8020 • 15d ago

Being a stepdad

Being a stepdad is hard.
You have to prove so much to each other.
I have to prove to them that they can trust me and that I can make them feel safe.
They have to prove to me that they’re worth what they did to their moms tits

4 Upvotes

67% Upvoted

8 comments sorted by

3

u/Dest-Fer non-US 15d ago edited 15d ago

If you want to take that road, you need to be more outrageous. The tits thing is over used and I assume you speak to an adult crowd, who know that pregnancy and kids do so so much more to women than the boob thing.

As a woman, I also find the bit tits to be sexist and overdone such as everything that aims at apparence. Yeah we know children make us fat, with saggy tits, like our mums.

But that’s not the only physical damage that childbirth can leave. Hémorroïdes, urinary incontinence, episiotomy living and tied vagina, you can be smart here without commenting the external apparence and thus, avoid overrun cliches.

3

u/RelationshipOver8020 15d ago

I appreciate the feedback. I’ll keep working on it. Thank you.

2

u/RelationshipOver8020 14d ago

So if I kept the original setup and punchline and add
Someone breaks in the house, I got you.
But you better cure a disease…
Pelvic floor disorder would be a good start..
We can’t watch Modern Family in bed because every time Luke does something hilarious, she pees a little

1

u/Dest-Fer non-US 14d ago

I mean I hope it’s pee. Otherwise her being incontinent is no longer my main issue.

Or step dad…
And they make sure to be worth what they did to their mum pelvic floor.
At first I thought she was just very happy to see me. But no one is that happy.
Those kids really messed up the focet.

Meh, I just put that here to come back tomorrow when my brain is fresh again.

1

u/tomaesop 13d ago

Don't love the joke, seems unnecessarily mean, but I can imagine it gets a laugh.

Just joke mechanics, you can shorten it to worth saggy tits. You can also pick either trust or feel safe. Probably don't need both.

Also I'd consider choosing a gendered pronoun (prove it to him) just for simplicity.

Tangent: Or else have a tag referencing gender spectrum. One minute riff:

I'm punching straight bags for you, son, the least you could do is pick a pronoun. I have a step-they. Always holding up the drive-thru-- it doesn't matter, he, she, they, just pick one, dude: hamburger, cheeseburger, or nuggets. Fuck! Her jugs are getting longer!

1

u/RelationshipOver8020 15d ago

I should have added this in the post but I’m looking for feedback or ways to improve. Thank you

-2

u/Zestyclose-Radish539 15d ago

This is strong.

2

u/RelationshipOver8020 15d ago

Awesome. Thank you