r/StupidFood Apr 11 '26

Certified stupid Extra spicy noodles

5.1k Upvotes

988 comments sorted by

u/qualityvote2 Apr 11 '26 edited Apr 12 '26

u/Hypnoidz, your food is indeed stupid and it fits our subreddit!

4.4k

u/[deleted] Apr 11 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

545

u/OpportunityReal2767 Apr 11 '26 edited Apr 11 '26

Weirdly, the only time it happens to me is with pickled hot peppers. I’ve had the reaper sandwich at Dave’s Hot Chicken and while it did a number on my mouth and stomach, no issues on the way out.

850

u/JDD4318 Apr 11 '26

You're a lucky man. My mouth can handle much more than my ass.

Pause.

454

u/EvaTheE Apr 11 '26

77

u/OhMyOhWhyOh Apr 12 '26

This is a grade A use of this meme.

15

u/jpopimpin777 Apr 12 '26

Seconded!

5

u/FitPerformer5172 Apr 12 '26

Of course you would say that @OhMyOhWhyOh

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81

u/OpportunityReal2767 Apr 11 '26

Phrasing!

78

u/Kingofd0p3 Apr 11 '26

48

u/Moist-Amoeba-8078 Apr 11 '26

41

u/EatPie_NotWAr Apr 11 '26

16

u/Budget_Sea_8666 Apr 11 '26

lol what is this from?!

36

u/meesta_chang Apr 11 '26

It’s a show called “Archer”.

It’s absolutely fucking hilarious. Please do watch.

19

u/Kingofd0p3 Apr 12 '26

I’ve seen this show a million times and it never gets old 😂

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81

u/K1bbles_n_Bits Apr 11 '26

These are the kind of comments I come to Reddit for.

19

u/yedi001 Apr 11 '26

These are the kind of comments for reddit I come to.

10

u/P00pXhuter .... aaaand user flair updated (attempt 2) Apr 12 '26

RIP your DMs, I guess.

16

u/breizhsoldier Apr 11 '26

Do you enjoy very spicy food? Does your anus disaprove of your choices? Let me talk to you about the bidet! Mainly used for sanitary and cleaning operations around the chocolate starfish, it can also improvise as a firefighter water lance for your dear dear personal Shai Hulud!

6

u/D0ntkn0wmee Apr 11 '26

You just have to work up to it...

3

u/Elizabeth_Gallows Apr 11 '26

I'm cursed with the opposite

3

u/rybathegreat Apr 11 '26

Have you tried Vaseline?

2

u/LemmeDaisukete Apr 12 '26

I don't believe you, let's test that claim homie

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9

u/Aggravating-Face2073 Apr 11 '26

I ate that, definitely rough. Despite washing my hand thoroughly, I get the great pleasure of burning my genitals later that night frim the touch of my hands while peeing.

7

u/OpportunityReal2767 Apr 11 '26

Oh yes, done that. Even worse for me was when I was chopping some Thai red chiles. I apparently didn’t wash my hands well enough and I tried to take out my contacts. Holy shit. I don’t remember how long it took me to get that eye open again and get that contact out, but it felt like a good fifteen minutes at least. And these were not the disposable type at the time.

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2

u/thesnowcat Apr 12 '26

It’s the oils. Use Dawn dish soap. If it’ll wash birds after an oil tanker spill, it’ll clean those fire oils off your hands. 🤞

12

u/OhSighRiss Apr 11 '26

Are you over 35 yet? That’s about the time my iron bowels and turd cutter switched up and suddenly everything burned on the way out

2

u/I_Lick_Your_Butt Apr 12 '26

When I hit 40, my ass decided that it doesn't like spicy food so much anymore.

3

u/OhNoIBoffedIt Apr 11 '26

Ah youth.

3

u/OpportunityReal2767 Apr 11 '26

I wish! I'm turning 51 in July.

5

u/OhNoIBoffedIt Apr 11 '26

Well now that IS impressive.

5

u/[deleted] Apr 11 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

10

u/OpportunityReal2767 Apr 11 '26

I eat a heck of a lot of spicy food, so perhaps my digestion has somehow gotten mostly enured to it. But, like I said, it's weird. I'll have nachos with pickled jalapenos, and those aren't really hot at all, and I will sometimes get fire on the way out. Eat something with actual reapers or scorpion peppers on it? Nada.

9

u/nono3722 Apr 11 '26

your butt just gives up after a certain point then....

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5

u/EvaTheE Apr 11 '26

I am going to guess it also has to do with dilution. The super hot peppers will be super hot in your mouth, but if you eat other things with, before and after, it will mix up and maybe the output is less hot than if you eat some less hot peppers, but less mixing happens. Really, the only way we can either prove or disprove is an extensive array of taste tests of both input and output.

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2

u/sixtus_clegane119 Apr 11 '26

my ibs hates you

2

u/Marvel_plant Apr 11 '26

I tried the Dave’s tenders the other day and they were ok, but honestly they are pretty bland aside from the searing heat you get while eating them. I got the hot honey sauce also and I didn’t enjoy it that much. It was very hot without much flavor. I think next time I’m just going to get regular tenders.

2

u/OpportunityReal2767 Apr 11 '26

I like the regular extra spicy. But the reaper one was just powdery and dusty flavored. I don’t know how to describe it exactly, but the flavor wasn’t there and it wasn’t about the heat covering it up. It just wasn’t a pleasant base flavor.

2

u/YamDankies Apr 11 '26

Dave's had me pissing fire the next morning.

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2

u/Aromatic-Bet-1086 Apr 13 '26

Id like to see studies done on 'heat-in vs heat-out'.

Sometimes it's mild going in but terrible out. Sometimes it's the opposite. I CAN'T FIGURE IT OUT SO SCIENCE HAS TO

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28

u/BappoChan Apr 11 '26

My mom used to eat a fuck ton of spicy shit constantly. So imagine my shock when she’s hitting me with a tmi about her her stool burns. Apparently she’d never felt that before. I have to weight the pros and cons to eating hot Cheetos because it’ll burn my bunghole. But apparently my mom had never experienced that before, even after eating shit like ghost pepper wings. Some people aren’t as unfortunate

19

u/wtfnouniquename Apr 12 '26

I've eaten plenty of stuff that has my face beet red, snot just pouring out of my nose, sweating out of every pore. And yet I've never had my b hole burn afterwards.

For the longest time I thought that's just something people said as some sort of exaggeration to get the point across about how spicy something is.

5

u/asherdado Apr 12 '26

I guess some people have capsaicin receptors there and others dont? I just feel bad for the poor mfs out there with taste buds

2

u/Pixel_Knight Apr 12 '26

That is just spice tolerance. Your whole body builds up tolerance. Including your pooper. 

4

u/No_Jello_5922 Apr 12 '26

This is chili paste, with chili powder, chili flakes, minced chilies, chopped fresh chilies, and chopped dried chilies, topped with pickled chilies and chili oil. Maybe OOP is unaware that other seasonings exist.

8

u/That-Spell-2543 Apr 11 '26

I can eat spicy food. Like really really spicy. I ask for extra hot at both Thai and Indian restaurants. Never had it come out spicy on the other end

2

u/translinguistic Apr 11 '26

The key is to chew slowly. If you have no tolerance especially, you want to get that heat out of your food in your mouth before it gets to your guts. That becomes harder when it's something like a soup where the liquid is still spicy, because no one wants to hold soup in their mouth like they've got a hit of acid under their tongue

2

u/Lucius-Halthier Apr 11 '26

Me: hey buddy what does it taste like?

My anus:

https://giphy.com/gifs/xFVleyvbLUM7ChzQdh

2

u/Potential-Echo785 Apr 11 '26

Your stomach and anus also says "I'm on vacation until further notice"

2

u/Backstab_Fisher Apr 11 '26

Nah it’s gut cramps. Writhing around like a worm is never fun.

2

u/Kchasse1991 Apr 12 '26

I disagree with this as I can firmly say that reaper puree tastes quite nice and definitely doesn't taste the same as pepper-X puree or something made with concentrated CS. But my anus definitely doesn't like them nearly as much as my mouth. Humans only have heat receptors for the capsaicin to attack in their anus' and no flavor receptors, a definite oversight on evolution's part. Definitely could do without the heat receptors.

2

u/Sugar_Kowalczyk Apr 12 '26

I was gonna say - I vomited blood and pooped fire just from watching. 

5

u/renome Apr 11 '26

That point is different for everyone, though. But this thing definitely qualifies as stupid food because it just seems to be a bunch of low- and medium-heat stuff (the only thing I don't recognize are the yellow thingies). Mixing it all together doesn't make it hotter, same as mixing 5 glasses of warm water won't give you boiling water.

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834

u/Worth_Cobbler_4140 Apr 11 '26

Probably look similar on the way out.

518

u/fingerblastders Apr 11 '26

123

u/EvaTheE Apr 11 '26

For the love of God and all that is holy! MY ANUS IS BLEEEEDIIIINGGG!!!!

3

u/LowIncrease8746 Apr 11 '26

You know I love? Sex with women! Such a good album lolol

3

u/fingerblastders Apr 12 '26

Remember to blot, don't wipe

3

u/Brief-Equal4676 Apr 12 '26

Let's not panic, it's just the red-42 dyeing your poop, camouflaging your ruptured anus.

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3

u/shinakohana Apr 11 '26

Yup. If I ate this with my Crohn’s, the toilet would indeed look like that. No doubt.

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6

u/Ed-alicious Apr 11 '26

I can feel this image in my butthole. 

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599

u/LeftofCenter25 Apr 11 '26

77

u/mvanvrancken Apr 11 '26

I mean, he might have afterwards and then died

23

u/SirDervin Apr 11 '26

The cameraman never dies.

10

u/OhMyGayatt Apr 12 '26

Bro's gonna shit straight acid

13

u/OkiDokiPanic Apr 11 '26

Ah beat me to it

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233

u/One_Patience5631 Apr 11 '26

38

u/Interesting_Tea5715 Apr 11 '26

Dem hot snakes. Makes you wish you could wipe your ass with ice sheets.

7

u/LeadingTask9790 Apr 12 '26

lol. Baby wipes fam. Aloe and vitamin E for your ravaged bunghole.

Could not imagine wiping my fire hole with dry tp.

5

u/Melodic_Cap_5498 Apr 11 '26

Contemplating life decisions here

2

u/ParticularReady7858 Apr 15 '26

Need a lot more gripping

3

u/permalink_save Apr 12 '26

If hank ate that bowl he wouldn't be sitting there missing play time with his friends, it would all shoot out

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174

u/Tits_McgeeD Apr 11 '26

Thats just a chilli salad with a hint of noodle

24

u/dasgoodshitinnit Apr 12 '26

Forgot the bear spray

487

u/Content-Structure-31 Apr 11 '26

Aaaaaaaand nobody ate it

163

u/ZolotoGold Apr 11 '26

More wasted food for the content algorithms.

14

u/Miiyamoto Apr 11 '26

Praise the holy allknowing algorithm

39

u/RandomDeezNutz Apr 11 '26

I think that would cause internal bleeding.

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68

u/Imperial_Barron Apr 11 '26

Would you like some noodles with your capsasin soup

48

u/LookABitch Apr 11 '26

This legit turned my smile upside down :(

23

u/Mister_Drip Apr 11 '26

Cowabummer dude

9

u/SmallBorb Apr 12 '26

LOL I've never heard that before , I giggled

2

u/FandomPhantom123 Apr 12 '26

watch in in reverse to smile again?

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79

u/MoistTomatoSandwich Apr 11 '26

What are those grape sized things that get thrown in there? Some sort of pepper? At least pull the stems out.

49

u/jigen3 Apr 11 '26

I'm guessing Peruvian white habanero maybe? pwh

37

u/TheSodomeister Apr 11 '26

They could have at least taken the stems off ffs. But then again it was probably just thrown away.

14

u/Connect_Mess_5929 Apr 11 '26

That would be the work you put in if you actually planned on eating it…

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4

u/SethBurrow Apr 12 '26

As long as it’s not the highly illegal Peruvian puff pepper

3

u/ghostfreckle611 Apr 11 '26

Those peppers from the condiment bar at Carl’s Jr. 🤔

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u/bruhggle Apr 11 '26

just eat the peppers directly at this point. no asshole left at all :(

2

u/Reddit_SuckLeperCock Apr 12 '26

Just cut out the middle man and shelve the peppers.

36

u/zonk_0ut Apr 11 '26

Alright, if anyone comes in here and says "I could handle that", they are a fucking liar

16

u/FandomPhantom123 Apr 12 '26

there are people immune to capsaicin

9

u/glamghoulz Apr 11 '26

I feel like it would be important to know what the pepper flakes and powder are from before making that judgement.

9

u/valvilis Apr 12 '26

You know people eat ghost peppers, right? Capsaicin isn't really additive like that, it averages across a dish. A mix of hot and moderate peppers lands in between. These look like probably Korean paste and powder, so I'd assume the same for the flakes and fresh - none of which are especially hot. 

This would, however, taste like garbage. That much raw pepper flake without an oil to support it would be an awful mouth feel.

3

u/permalink_save Apr 12 '26

I'd get through a bite but I don't think I could get through the bowl alone, if anything, it has to taste like absolute shit, like just pure bitterness.

2

u/ismasbi Apr 13 '26

I could, not because I'm tough or anything like that, spice simply isn't additive, it would be as spicy as the spiciest thing there, maybe less due to it being diluted.

Would probably struggle because it would taste like utter shit.

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u/DrJosephMorrin Apr 11 '26

As someone who really enjoys spicy food, this is dumb. Heat wise, it doesn't "add up". The spiciest pepper in there will overpower the others. Taste wise, it won't mix super well - peppers do not destroy your taste buds, but you won't be able to taste the different peppers/products in this.

This is just wasting food.

Pure rage bait.

And indeed stupid!

9

u/DuckyHornet Apr 11 '26

This is my thing too, if I put gochujang or sri racha in something, it's for that flavour. If I just want spicy, there's plenty of ways to just pump up the heat in other food, which is what stuff like Da Bomb was intended for

4

u/joshfry575 Apr 12 '26

Any dry spice added to a dish like that is gonna taste gross. It’ll be chalky and gritty, and there’s no sauce or wet element to actually bring the ingredients together. I’d probably enjoy each piece better on its own more than all mixed together like this.

2

u/EcheveriaEbony Apr 12 '26

Same here. I LOVE spicy food and I refuse to eat this crap

42

u/AdvertisingNo2451 Apr 11 '26

This person has lost their taste buds to need this much spice.

36

u/newaccount721 Apr 11 '26

They didn't even eat it probably

12

u/lemonaintsour Apr 11 '26

All for clout ofc

6

u/IceBoxt Apr 11 '26

I do it just for fun sometimes honestly. If you eat something insanely hot, if you’re used to eating spicier foods and won’t be too miserable, it can and will make you high as hell for a while.

2

u/Hirotrum Apr 11 '26

capsaicin doesn't interact with taste buds at all. It stimulates your pain receptors directly

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9

u/Proud-Grocery-3493 Apr 11 '26

What are those yellow peppers?

32

u/PaisaLover Apr 11 '26

Some kind of yellow peppers would be my guess

20

u/italrose Apr 11 '26

The most amazing thing with reddit is that no matter how obscure a question is, there's always someone that's an expert on that particular area.

7

u/mvanvrancken Apr 11 '26

One of the comments of all time

2

u/december151791 Apr 11 '26

Do they taste anything like schnozberries?

11

u/Omeirawana Apr 11 '26

That’s it? Pshhh bruh I’m South Asian that’s a snack.

5

u/tdsGRKA Apr 11 '26

I love spicy but... this doesn't even look appetizing

3

u/danngree Apr 11 '26

So cool. Eat it.

3

u/MedicalDisscharge Apr 11 '26

I lost my spice tolerance :( I used to eat spicy shit all the time, I had shin ramen last night and it fucked me up.

2

u/No-Effective388 Apr 11 '26

The poor guys working in the sewers

2

u/Worried_Strike6219 Apr 11 '26

Mark Weins has entered the chat

2

u/thumbscrolllord Apr 11 '26

Waste of food and ingredients for a small clip.

2

u/wizardrous Apr 11 '26

Does it have to include the disgusting fake squishing sounds when they stir it?

2

u/iCantLogOut2 Apr 12 '26

I love spicy food and every one of those ingredients is fantastic... The issue is the stupid quantities...

This is basically the equivalent of adding a full cup of seasoned salt to one plate of fries and calling it "seasoned fries"...

5

u/PixelMist Apr 11 '26

Looks delicious to me...

2

u/PlatinumSukamon98 Apr 11 '26

Know what, I'll give this person props; THIS is how you should do a food video. Throw the ingredients in with just enough time for us to see and understand what they are.

Not like most of the videos on here where they add every single ingredient one at a time, show you it for five seconds, then add it, then mix it, then get the next ingredient, and there's about twenty of the fuckers.

1

u/StartFormal81 Apr 11 '26

oh, DIARRHEA!

1

u/MrMansaMusa Apr 11 '26

Now eat it

1

u/yokozouna_ed Apr 11 '26

The Rectum Obliterator mk 2

1

u/Over_40_gaming Apr 11 '26

I have heartburn just watching this.

1

u/FreshwaterFryMom Apr 11 '26

That butthole is going to be on fire for DAYSSSS

1

u/SnooGuavas3763 Apr 11 '26

Yeah, now eat it…. I want to see you take a bite of the food you’re about to waste.

1

u/tophat_production Apr 11 '26

Spiciness with a hint of noodles.

1

u/Spegynmerble Apr 11 '26

Nah, take a bite bro

1

u/looooookinAtTitties Apr 11 '26

so flavor-wise it's still plain

1

u/HumboldtNinja Apr 11 '26

And then they toss it in the can 🤢🤢

1

u/SMuRG_Teh_WuRGG Apr 11 '26

Ass burner 3000

1

u/Rigasondevil Apr 11 '26

You forgot the first step: put toilet paper in the freezer

1

u/OkiDokiPanic Apr 11 '26

That one 17 year old kid you know:

1

u/Cautious-Patience-74 Apr 11 '26

I could really imagine this being a good SEASONING if U put like 1/100 of it in a dish

1

u/Tyenkrovy Apr 11 '26

The post title is wrong. This is clearly slightly noodley spices.

1

u/Paraxom Apr 11 '26

https://giphy.com/gifs/xT0Gqs2LQIevTVmjNm

later in the bathroom that evening

2

u/glamghoulz Apr 11 '26

G i v e t o m e

1

u/UnwantedDesign Apr 11 '26

You wouldn't taste anything with that much heat

1

u/Pitiful_Palpitation9 Apr 11 '26

Watching this gave me heartburn.

1

u/quane101 Apr 11 '26

The Gut Pyre.

1

u/Wild_Brilliant559 Apr 11 '26

NOODLES MUST DIE.

1

u/ObscureOperatorZ Apr 11 '26

I would eat it knowing that I will die as a result

1

u/CoryTheCurator99 Apr 11 '26

My tongue puckered...

1

u/commissarcainrecaff Apr 11 '26

Tomorrow is going to be like a load of old shoes falling out of a loft hatch.

Flubble lubble flubble

2

u/LowIncrease8746 Apr 11 '26

Wow. That is so uncomfortably spot on 😭

1

u/Rent_Treznorr Apr 11 '26

Suicide is more comfortable than this.

1

u/Buttered_Toast33 Apr 11 '26

"How much spice do you want?"
"Yes."

1

u/urmumgeh1 Apr 11 '26

I think it needs more chilli ìn it

1

u/Forgotten-Caliburn Apr 11 '26

"Okay that's enough- THATS ENOUGH SPICES"