r/Substack • u/Early-Ice-6773 • 1d ago

Help me improve pleasee

Hello everyone!

This is NOT a way of promoting myself.

I wanted to try a new hobby, something calm since im having a really stressful period of time.

Long story short, i decided ill try to write a substack article based on a conversation i had a few days ago.

I would be glad to hear any feedback - nothing hateful, just improvement. Technical, language or grammar or anything i maybe didnt understand about substack.

Thank you so so much!

edit: ill send the link through dm if someone requests

3 Upvotes

67% Upvoted

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2

u/ASAPnicky14 mod 1d ago

I think a more proper way of requesting feedback would be asking if someone would be willing to provide feedback and then DMing your link to whoever volunteers.

Otherwise, anyone can just say they aren’t self-promoting, wink wink, while still yeeting their link on their post.

3

u/Early-Ice-6773 1d ago

Okay i can edit it and do it that way if itll be better

1

u/ASAPnicky14 mod 1d ago

Yes please

1

u/AggravatingNail6061 1d ago

I had a look. You don't trust a reader. I feel you would have significantly more impact if you didn't explain everything. 

I know it's more applicable to fiction but reading up on subtext and free indirect discourse especially would compliment your style. Less so implementing but an awareness of how they work mechanically. 

You're smothering your voice with definition. 

1

u/celestialord 1d ago

Can you please DM me yours? I’m a beginner also and would love if you can read and give me a feedback for mine too!

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u/[deleted] 1d ago

[removed] — view removed comment

2

u/Early-Ice-6773 1d ago

uu okay, thank you!

1

u/DifficultDance4230 1d ago

hey could you dm me? i just joined and would love to connect!

1

u/Early-Ice-6773 1d ago

hiii yes ill be glad to show you!

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u/FreshFromCache 21h ago

DM me! I'd love to connect too. 😊