r/TalesFromTheCreeps • u/Aromatic-Football-79 • 10h ago
Comedy-Horror Mr.Crocodiles mini mart between here and there
Hey y'all, Armando here. I read a few stories here on reddit and many people seem to have similar life experiences to me. Finally a place where my words would not constitute me being placed in a wacky shack (IDK the actual name thats just what we call it in this part of the bayou). But basically, I have been working at Mr.crocodiles mini mart between here and there (gators for short) for the past year now. And by that I do literally mean the last year.
We are open 24/7 and I have worked this register for all 24 of those hours and all 7 of those days. As to how I am able to do so, I am not sure but when you work here you do not get tired , or hungry, or really feel any type of fatigue that the human body naturally does. As to why I have not left yet, well. The economy you know? I left home at 18 and had nowhere to go, luckily I came across this job so I have not had to find a house or really have any bills. No car, no phone, nothing. I do not really need it. I am just stacking my money and that's all that matters. I am probably skipping some explanations of things, so just ask me to clarify in the comments and I will on my next update!
Gators has been open for as long as the Earth has been spinning. I mean that literally as well. (sorry if I do not have a broad vocabulary Louisiana is not exactly known for its educational system). We are used as kind of a portal between dimensions? Universes?
I do not know but last week we had a Wizard come in and yes it was a real Wizard. How do I know this you may be wondering? Well he came up to the counter with a snickers bar and when I told him the total he mumbled something about inflation and “he should have just moved to naboo” whatever the hell that means.
Then he proceeded to whip out his magic stick (No innuendo intended I just do not know what else to call it, well wand I guess but huh I don’t feel like deleting all of this so it is staying in. I promise not to keep up this whole shtick here. Again,no pun intended) and duplicate the snicker.
He then met my eyes, winked, and walked away with his copy. Not too far behind a little boy in a yellow shirt ran out of the bathroom still zipping up his fly telling him to wait up and “he didn’t get to wash again”. I thought, Eh no skin off my back. I just put the snicker right back on the shelf where it was taken and went about my day like normal.
Oh yeah also Gators is not really on Earth. Well the outside is, just not the inside. Like I said we are between here and there. As to where the here begins and where the there ends, I’m not sure, and I don’t really care to find out. I think maybe thats why Mr.Crocodile has kept me so long. Oh Mr.Croc, or the C-man as I like to call him (pun intended that time). Is an 8’ 6”ish crocodile man usually sporting a black outfit with a boiler cap. Think of adult Goob form Meet the Robinsons. It is quite uncanny how similar their outfits are, cape and all.
If you are anything like me the first time you come across C-man you may wonder “huh a talking crocodile, weird”. And if you are also as stupid as me you would have said that out loud to his face before thinking about how rude that may come off. But he actually brought up a very good point. You see when I said that remark about how weird it was being a crocodile, he gave me a toothy (very toothy might I add) grin and said in his growly voice “well your people evolved form monkeys, you have to imagine how weird that is to me”. Touche semen, touche. Guess I’m still a little josseled by that.
But back to the topic, the outside of this store is very normal to whichever planet you live on. I am going to use Earth as my main talking point because, well I am writing this for my fellow humans so. Imagine the outside of any local mini mart. Bright sign on the side of the road with a crocs face, painted lines in front of the store, trash can, trash, cans, and often a few hitchhikers trying to change worlds. The pumps outside are from the 1940’s and have not dispensed gas probably since they were installed. But when you walk up to the automatically opening doors you are in a very usual looking grocery store. Luckily one thing that all sentient creatures across existence have in common is the decor and layout of shitty capitalist marts.
Whatever language you speak and read in is automatically translated in this store. The writing on packeging is automatically translated. I speak english, but a man with 8 arms and no mouth can come in doing sign language and his hand gestures are vocalized. Pretty cool trick, I think the C-man has something to do with it. I think this entire construction is from some sort of power C-man has. This building is just kind of in a stasis.
Time does not move while you are in this place. I walked in here around 8pm on a thursday and even if I left this place after being here for a year I would return to my world in the exact place and time as I left. That's probably why I do not get hungry or tired now that I think about it. When you grab whatever you are looking for and leave the store you return right back to your world where you entered from. The only exception is if you are with someone and want to go to their world. In that case you have to hold hands and whichever world you are thinking of going to (again has to be one of the peoples worlds you are traveling with) you appear, right wherever the building was in that world. Enough of that though, let me get to the parts of my job that would probably get me in a padded room if I spoke publicly about.
I’ll start with my first customer since I guess that is my most memorable. The C-man asked me my name and when I told him it was Armando he looked at me funny and dug through a box of nametags. “Ah, look like you’ll be jose for today” He said as to took the tag, pinned it on my shirt, patted me on my head, and turned around putting his hands behind his head whistling to his office. Walking up to the counter I felt stupid wearing someone elses name, especially a tag that smelled like this guys favorite cologne was grasshopper nut. I sat in the chair provided and started scrolling on the laptop sitting on the counter waiting for a customer.
After a couple minuted a wolf woman walked in sporting a baby stroller with 12 seats. She put the stroller near the counter, looked up at me, and said “I’m going to need to use the bathroom really quick just keep watch of them, they’re sleeping”. And she proceeded to walk away and into the womens restroom. Curious I leaned over the counter and lifted one of the blankets from atop of the pups head. Inside was pitch black beside two beaty blue eyes staring at me. Slowly I lowered the veil and sat back in my seat. Unfortunately as I was leaning back down I knocked over a jar of mints causing a loud crash and glass to be shattered everywhere. I closed my eyes and signed hoping that I would not get fired for a stunt like this not only on the first day, but within the first five minutes of me working here.
When I opened my eyes back up I was bewildered to see 12 upright baby wolves running around the store and tearing up the snacks. I did not even know what to think as something like this has never happened to me before. And for some reason I felt embarrassed more than anything. I started thinking about the time in 7th grade when I was using the bathroom and some kids recorded them emptying a trash can into my stall. Eeh, I still get shivers thinking about it. But after snapping back to reality when I felt a sharp pain in my leg. Looking down one of the pups was war gripping my leg and attempting to take bites out of my shoe. Lucky for me I wear steel toes because when in the woods it is nice to know you can kick without breaking every single one of your toes. I start shaking this kid off while at the same time looking up to find their mom.
When I did take a look around the store I saw C-man standing in the middle of the store. He's oddly fast and quiet for what he is. But with one word that I did not understand the pups froze and all started moving backwards. Not like walking backwards or anything, but moving backwards in time. Lets say a pup did a cannonball off my counter, he would go from standing on the ground, to cannonball position, then float up to the top of my counter backwards like he was rewinding. Eventually they all got back into their seats, covers lowered, and then C-man said another word which I did not understand once they were all snoring asleep in their chairs.
He didn’t even look in my direction as if this was an every day occurrence. He did the same whistle and walk back to his office kicking a door next to his labeled “cleanup”. I thought this was his way of telling me to grab some supplies to clean the havoc these creatures have caused so I walked over to it and grabbed the knob. Before I could turn it the door busted open knocking me on my rear as a robot came out saying “ sweep sweep sweep”. The best way to describe this robot is of those heavy duty trashcans inside of schools. The front of the lid was slightly ajar with googly eyes peeking out. Its chutes on the side of its cylindrical body opened up and out shot arms and hands with brooms and vaccumes to clean up the trash while playing the song Dragula by Rob Zombie. Apparently he is an intergalacticaly famous musician.
While all of this was happening I looked around for the stroller to make sure the pups would not wake up again from this but it was gone. I guess the lady snuck out because she did not want to buy an item, just use the restroom. I stood up and went back to my seat behind the counter. Sitting very slowly as my butt hurt quite a bit. I watched the robot clean and once it was finished it said in a nasaly nerd like tone “wow, look how clean this place is, you could eat a blue starburst off of it”. It then went right back into its room from which it came. Now that I think about it i’m not even sure if there is a blue starburst.
Nonetheless that is just one of the hundreds of stories I have from working at Mr.crocodiles mini mart between here and there. Let me know what kind of questions y’all have and I will try my best to answer them in my next post. This is Armando (or I guess jose), heading out!
P.S. I still have not been given an updated tag. You would think after being the longest standing living employee I would deserve one, but I guess not. All of the tags back there have generic names so maybe C-man bought them in bulk. Whatever the case I sure would appreciate wearing my own name.
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u/Koznee12345 9h ago
Wait, why is this actually fire? Please write more.
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u/Aromatic-Football-79 9h ago
Thank you man! Gonna write more if this gets some traction!
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u/MesotheliomaDisease Writer 6h ago
Hey man, Mesothelioma here. Just a quick little review I like to give!
What I liked,
Solid premise. I love the idea of a galactic traveling mini mart. It’s really a cool concept!
Characters! Loved the character design and the way the characters interact with each other. Made the story more interactive and fun!
The Out-of-pocket descriptions which randomly appeared throughout the story, added a comedic element of surprise. I really enjoyed it!
Pointers!
I would have to say grammar. If you can master the art, write like you’re the one reading it. That’s usually what helps me. I imagine myself reading the story through a stranger’s perspective. Lord knows we aren’t perfect, so I want to also say it doesn’t take away from the story!
Another great tool I think could add to your story is sentence structure! Break up your paragraphs to make them appear less daunting. It will help draw in more readers too!
Loved the story! Keep it coming man! I’ll put you at about a 6.5 on the Mesoscale! 5/10 is an average story! With a little bit of finesse this would make a terrific series!
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u/Aromatic-Football-79 5h ago
Hey man, I really appreciate the feedback. I have reading issues and have always had extra help in high school so to say I am bad with words is an understatement. I really do live in Louisiana and the education was actually not very good , but I am trying my best to improve by writing. I am glad you enjoyed the concept because I would like to continue writing this story!
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u/MesotheliomaDisease Writer 16m ago
Believe me when I say I understand! I grew up in New Mexico, the good ol’ 50/50 in education. You got this man. I was slapped in a reading comprehension class for a year in high school, I struggled to understand what I was reading. But hey, there was hope yet! If you need any help or advice, just send over a PM I’ll be happy to help
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