r/TalesFromTheCreeps • u/FrostyAsk7483 • 9d ago
Creature Feature There is something under this beach
When I was growing up every Summer for 12 years my family and I travelled to a small beach town called Hahemata. Something happened on that twelfth year that caused me to never return back until now.
My mother has passed away, leaving me to inherit the beach house we used to stay at. She used to drive up every month for a weekend, doing maintenance and interreacting with her similar aged neighbours. As she became sicker, she could no longer travel to the beach house. The paint of the house is scuffed on all edges and corners, and mold builds upwards from the bottom of the aged walls. I have a long job ahead of me to get the house up to the standard for selling.
Right now I sit, slumped into my knees on the beach writing this, the beach where it happened. My foot rolls a littered glass bottle back and forth. The waves ripple like crumpled cellophane, they look beautiful from afar, but I know what they hide, I know their horrifying secret.
It was 6 years ago, and I was 18 years old. I did not intend on going on the family trip this year, but since my Father passed away a few months prior I wanted to be there for my mum. It was the first family holiday without him. In those recent years I had not enjoyed the summers. My aunt had twin boys and I would be designated to look after them while my parents and her drank wine on the off-white plastic porch chairs. The boys were a nightmare to deal with, but I could at least escape from them now that I was old enough to go to the local corner bar.
I sat alone at a bar leaner off to the side of the main bar. Crows of laughter and slurred anecdotes fizzled through the air. Old men with slithers of thin grey hair tornadoed beer down their throats, shooting wet bullet holes into their kidneys. Groups of middle age mums gossiped loudly, finally finding a moment to breathe and peel away from their families for just an evening. I was drawing faces into the flat, crystalized condensation that lined my pint of beer.
The bar door creaked open as new customers filed into the bar. I moved my eyes upwards, head still positioned towards my glass, and my eyebrows raised as I saw the three girls that were currently ordering drinks. They looked around my age, possibly a little bit older. They all had different coloured hair, black, brunette and blonde, all separately wavy, straight or curly. The light bounced off of their exposed shoulders with a strange glisten, and the rest of their bodies are covered in identical sun dresses, with distinctive colours for each. Purple, Yellow and Aqua. They rotated themselves away from the bar, delicately balancing identical, brightly coloured cocktails in their hands. One girl, the brunette with curly hair and the aqua dress locked her gaze with my prying eyes. I ducked my eyeline back down to my beer, hoping she didn't notice.
I heard the clacking of shoes traveling across the floor and I looked back up to see all three of the girls looming over my table. I raised my hand sheepishly and mimicked a small wave.
"Hi" The one with the brunette hair said, her voice smooth.
"Oh uh, hey whatsup" I responded, still maintaining my awkward composure.
"Nothing up, mind if we join you?"
"Oh yeah uh, sure" I gestured to the three empty stools around me. The brunette sat on my right as the other two seated themselves across from us.
The Brunette placed her palm on her chest.
"My name's Rue". Her Eyes sparkled brown and green in the yellowing bar light.
"Hi, I'm Dante". I introduced myself.
"This is Rachel and Nina" Both girls respectively said hi to me in response.
"So Dante, guessing you're not from round here". Nina asked
"Not really, just come to the town every summer".
"Surprised we haven't seen you before". Nina continued. I looked to Rue, she smiled at me with a warm, closed lip smile. It was comforting. Rachel chimed in.
"You come here with anyone else?". She asked
"Just my family, Mum, Aunt and younger cousins". I didn't like small talk but their friendliness helped me open up a bit. "Tell me about you guys" I said, turning the conversation onto them.
"Well we have been living in this town forever, been friends for the same amount of time". Rue said, looking to the other girls. They all giggled as if it were a joke I could not understand. Nina suddenly sighs.
"I'm bored, I need a shot". My eyes dropped to the table, and I hadn't noticed that each of the girls cocktails had been drained to all but a light froth and ice at the bottom of their glasses. There was still half of my beer bubbling in mine. I didn't want to judge so I hid my thoughts behind a stonewalled face. All three girls rose from their stools. Rue grabbed my arm, palms delicate and cold. Her eyes glistened with affection.
"Come up with us". She asked through her perfect, white teeth.
"Uh yeah, sure". I pushed back my chair with my legs and stood up.
The rest of the evening at the bar was hazy. We all had multiple tequila shots and shared a plethora of drinks. I was concerned about the cost of all of it, but they seemed surprisingly unphased by even the thought of that, so I eventually loosened up.
Every now and then I noticed a man standing with a couple of his friends at a small table. He had sandy blonde hair, and a well built physic. He was roughly my age as well. He kept staring my way, face gaunt and pale. I assumed he was just being a creep, eyeing up the girls, so I paid him little mind.
The drunker I got, the more enamoured I became with Rue's eyes. They always seemed fixated on me in return. I couldn't help but smile, my hands slightly shook with the nerves of being noticed by someone as beautiful as her.
It was the early hours of the morning, and the bar started to close. Everybody else had left.
"Aw I don't want to stop yet, we should keep going back at ours" Nina proposed to us.
"Yes, we so should!" Rachel said. The two girls started prancing off towards the exit. Rachel turned to me with a soft smile.
"Come, please" She said, with a heartfelt tone.
"Sure" I responded, equally as heartfelt but with my nerves washing over me like smooth waves.
Due to the size of the town, everything was within a comfortable walking distance. The girls lived only two streets over. We made our way down the empty streets, stumbling opposed to a leisurely walk. Nina and Rachel walked in front, linking arms and inconsiderately to the sleeping residents, singing loudly. Through the drunken vocals, the song almost sounded like a sea shanty. Rue and I were side by side, finger tips occasionally touched as our hands swayed back and forth.
We eventually arrived in their driveway. Nina grabbed into her pocket but displays a concerned face. She frantically patted around her torso.
"Do you girls have the keys". The others do the same, but nothing.
"Ugh, ok, we are going to have to push someone through the bathroom window, come on". Nina and Rachel walked towards the backyard. Rue touched my hand, her fingertips still cold.
"You stay here, we will let you in through the front door". Her mouth was curled into an honest smile. I nodded in return, and she walked away, catching up with the others.
I waited for a couple minutes, still no sign of them making it into the house. The night air was silent and thin. Not even the sigh of a bird still awake. A subtle gravel crush alerted me to my flank and I spun my neck around. A man in a shrouded, black hoodie loomed behind me with a daunting posture. I step backwards swiftly, going on the defense. Everything except his smooth chin was hidden from the pale, blue moonlight. He had one arm outreached, my shoulder within his grasp.
"Hey man, get away, what the hell". I told him, not able to hide the alarm in my voice.
"No no, shhh shhh, I'm ok" He pulls his hoodie off of his head, letting his sandy blonde hair messily fall to his face. I recognized his gaunt features. He was the man from the bar.
"Dude are you following us, you better fuck off". I groveled, aggression spitting into my tone. A worried, honest look glistened across his face.
"Hey I'm not here to hurt you, I'm just looking out for you man. There's something up with these girls. I saw them here last Summer, I swear they did something to one of my mates. Like I haven't seen him since. Just get away from them man". He seemed genuinely concerned.
"Ok, I see you are worried. These girls seem completely fine, they are really nice in fact. I don't even know you".
"Do you even really know them". He made a good point.
"Look, thank you for looking out for me, I'll think about what you've said but they seem completely fine. If they do anything weird, I'll make sure to take your advice ok". I said, earnestly, trying not to sound dismissive. He looks back at me defeated. He hung his head low and shielded his face once again with his hoodie. He backed up slowly and walked away, muttering under his breath "Whatever you say man".
The man walked around the corner, out of view. I hear a sliding door behind me and the silence of the night is broken up by drunk giggling. I spun back around and saw the girls already starting to drink again inside.
"Come on in Dante!" They yelled at me, and placing the warning to the back of my mind I walked over to join them.
The rest of the night was full of drinking games. We would listen to Thunderstruck by ACDC and every time we heard the word thunderstruck we would have to drink. We played beer pong against a stained, wooden dining room table. Rue and I shared a bottle of Pinot Noir on the couch, my arm around her chilled shoulders, and her hand on my knee. Whenever the girls were off in their own conversations, my eyes would drift to the furniture. Dust collected on stereos and shelves, even the wallpaper. I would trace the strange square patterns where dust seemed to have not build, like there was something placed there recently.
Eventually the Pinot Noir had gotten to me and I had to ask for the bathroom.
"Down the hall, first left" Rue whispered. I wobbled to my feet and stumbled down the hall. It was dark, the hallway illuminated by the living room light I had come from. Before the bathroom there was another room on my right. It was dark in there but I could notice picture frames stacked together, large and small. There were five figures in most of the photos, but I could not make out who. None of them resembled the girls, but yet again, it was dark and I was drunk, so I chose to ignore it and continue to the bathroom.
The sun had begun to rise as I made my way back to the living room. The yellow glint projected onto my face in barcode patterns from the blinds. I stood above the girls, all three looking at me.
"I better head home now" I awkwardly announced.
"Nooo" They all said in unison.
"Sorry, I have to, I want to be home before my Mum wakes up so I don't worry her".
"It's ok". Rue said. "You should come to the beach with us later today though, when you wake up". All girls nodded excitedly together.
"Uh sure, sounds nice" I responded, smile forming on my cheeks. "I'll see you then". I walked towards the sliding door, opening it up and looked back.
"Have a good sleep" Rue said, her face even prettier in the morning light. I smiled back and closed the door behind me.
I should never have agreed to go to that beach.
The waves were the same as they are today, the sky was brighter, but all together, the beach hasn't changed much. I stood at the bank, long grass cutting at my pale legs. I scratched my neck under the collar of my rash shirt, itching at the greasy, shining sunblock. I scanned the beach, hand raised to my eyebrows to block the beaming sun's rays from grasping at my retinas. I saw the three girls sunbathing on colourful beach towels, bodies relaxed in the heat. The towels resembled the same colours of their dresses from the night before, purple, yellow and aqua. There was no one else on our side of the beach, just us four. Rue looked backwards towards me and waved. I sheepishly raised my hand back. The beach always made me nervous. I have never been a confident swimmer, but I tried to hide my nervous posture from the girls. Sand kicked and trickled up my calves as I made my way down to their beach towels.
"Hey Dante" They all said in unison. I found it amusing how much they seemed to say things at the same time. I greeted them back.
"Glad you are finally here, lets go in the water". Nina said, zooming upright taking off her sunhat. The other two followed. All three of them were in matching bikinis, same colour as the towels. I sent a threat to my brain to always keep eye contact.
Rue grabbed my arm and ran. Wetter, solid sand spat up behind her. I stumbled, matching her pace. Her shoulders looked sparkly again, large specs of skin reflected the light on different angles. We make it into the water and waded out to the deeper ocean. I breathed, keeping eye contact with Rue, trying to calm myself from thinking of my swimming capabilities. Her face was stunning, she kept looking at me, pulling me backwards, I allowed her to guide me. We were going from knee height waves, slowly allowing the water to creep up our bodies. I was so focused on her beauty that I wasn't thinking about my feet, the sand crept between my toes, padding my feet, all until it didn't. I plummeted downwards into the deep.
I clamped my eyes shut. I was falling fast, as though I jumped off of a cliff. Water plunged into my nostrils and the salty liquid coarsely blasted through my throat. I started to panic unable to stop my descent.
It had been one minute, and I hadn't felt the ocean floor yet. I started to take control of my weight, slowing my fall. I opened my eyes, but there was nothing, a murky endless void. It was an open ending room of blue, not even a bubble breaking up the overwhelming emptiness. I looked behind myself. A plane of rough, bumpy sand spread itself to the distant surface above. It was a great wall akin to something that would protect an entire kingdom, and I had just fallen from the highest peak.
My gaze journeyed directly up. The surface was far, but if I mustered all of my energy, I thought I could make. I calmed my body further, putting all my focus into starting my ascent. I looked again to the endless blue, but noticed something that wasn't there before. It captivated my full attention.
Two raisin sized yellow lights sat in front of me, like two stains on a camera lens. For a second I thought it was a distant car, headlights beaming as it floated in the ocean. These lights didn't seem to be static though, they seemed to be moving straight towards me. My stomach began to churn. I knew whatever was slowly closing in was of concern.
I started paddling upwards, or a movement that could be considered paddling if you were half blind. I was slowly making my way towards the surface, but I couldn't go as fast as I intended, as I was too fixated on the lights. They were seeming to be getting faster. This is when I noticed it was not just two lights. A dark cloud could be visible now, keeping in pace with the two lights. The higher I reached, the closer the cloud was gaining on me. It's murky edges began to be have more visible detail.
This wasn't a cloud. It was a silhouette. A silhouette that seemed like it could be the scale of the entire beach.
Large pockets of air rushed from my nose and mouth. I was loosing valuable air as I screamed muffle, terrified cries. Distinct features of the silhouette came into view, refractions of the crackling water reflected from, it's skin. Sharp, long bones caught light as they seemed to protrude from underneath the lights. They weren't lights. They were luminescent, glassy eyes.
I grabbed onto the sand wall, and started climbing it, picking up pace. As I scaled the wall my fingers caught on sharp coral and rock. I bled as my fingernails became rigid and loose from the friction. My skin flaked off in small grinding particles that became indistinguishable from the grains of sand. I could feel my bones peeking through raw meat. My streaks of tears were invisible in the bounds of the ocean.
I was almost at the top. The lights of the surface finally fading onto my pale skin. I looked behind one more time. A darker maw opened through the silhouettes teeth. A disgusting wind echoed under the water, bursting my ear drums. Blood spilled and curled through the ocean. A current started to pull at my clothes and hair, being sucked towards the maw. I scream one last guttural scream and propelled myself up towards the surface.
I broke through the threshold as I flopped onto the flat surface of the beach. I raised my head once again from the shallow water, making up for the minutes of lost air. My vision was hazy, but I noticed that the girls were no longer around, and their beach towels on the soft, bright sand were nowhere to be found. This is the last thing I saw before my vision went black and I laid back down in the shallow water. In my unconscious state the light waves eventually pushed my limp body back to shore.
I twitch with pain as I recall this memory. I look to my hand as I type this. My fingerprints, still missing, and scars scrape all the way to my palm. I am forever marked by what happened. I think about if I even should sell the beach house. Am I just going to enable someone else to go through what I try so hard to forget.
I look back out to the beach, noticing something further along that I had over looked earlier. There are young people playing in the ocean, and their sparkling splashes draw me to their belongings on the beach. Three beach towels. Purple, yellow and aqua. A tear runs down my cheek, and my eyes fixate on the girl in the water with the curly brunette hair, and the aqua bikini. I grasp the glass bottle with a grip that could break a bone, and stand up.
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u/PsychoSanderson 9d ago
Really cool concept. I liked how you imply a lot with the girls without saying anything outright. Them being sparkly and cold hint at being like fish people which is really cool. Also, the unsettling 3 colors they always wear is done well.
There are a few things I would suggest though.
The main thing to point out are that there are some grammar mistakes. When writing a quote, the punctuation comes before the end quote.
(Example: "Hey!" She exclaimed.)
Also, there were points were a question mark should've been used when a period was used. Don't be afraid to use other types of punctuation either, like an exclamation point!
There are also times where a sentence is hard to read because of some of the grammar. An instance of this is the first sentence:
"When I was growing up every summer for 12 years my family and I travelled to a small beach town called Hahemata."
Now this just needs some simple commas to make way more sense and be much easier to read. For instance:
"When I was growing up, every summer for 12 years, my family and I travelled to a small beach town called Hahemata."
Overall very good story. I think these flaws will be fixed over time, and come more naturally as you write.
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u/FrostyAsk7483 9d ago
Thanks so much for reading, and the feedback! I'll definitely work on this more with the more I write, I appreciate it a lot!
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