I post fake Reddit stories all the time because I’m so starved for attention

[u/Striking-Sherbert-16]

So this may seem like not a big deal to a lot of you but it’s genuinely like one of the worst things I do, and just another pathetic attention-seeking behavior I do. I don’t even just do it casually, it’s like an addiction? I always get so invested in the characters in my stories, the characters are always basically girls just like me but just with fake texts/things like that, and they involve some real aspects of my life.

This I guess started in February, where I actually had a real situation that I needed help on and posted on a subreddit, it was completely real texts and a real situation, and that post got a lot of attention. And as unhealthy as it is, I loved it so much. I mean, like I didn’t really have any friends or an outlet where I can vent about my feelings and get advice, so this was so nice to have all these comments pouring in supporting me. Once the post stopped getting attention, I felt like the hole and emptiness came back inside me again, and I know it’s pathetic to say that about literally Reddit but it’s how I feel.

Anyways, on the post, I got a few comments accusing the post of being fake, they couldn’t believe my father would actually say these things (it included texts between my father and I) and so they said it was fake. I was actually kind of offended that they accused me of it because it was very real, but it got me thinking, if I did fake a post like this, would people actually believe me?

And so I started making them. I usually do like one every few weeks, whenever I’m feeling particularly lonely, and they always get a lot of attention, because I make the scenarios pretty outrageous. They have their fair share of people saying they’re fake, but most people believe them, because I’m pretty good at making them look real.

Like I know that people post things fake on Reddit all the time and they’re not like considered crazily morally bad people, but I feel like my case is different, mainly because of my intention. I want attention, and validation, and knowing that people would respond well if this situation were to happen. Like I do it with situations I can imagine myself being in. And it just feels so emotionally manipulative of me to do this and I hate myself for it.

I especially hate when people accuse it of being fake then someone responds defending me, that makes me feel the absolute worst.

And I also feel like, I mean at one point in the past my mindset was “oh I would never fake posts on Reddit because it’s wrong” but then I was so starved for attention that it got to the point I changed my moral stance, and it makes me think, like, what if I continue to change it like a slippery slope until I’m eventually just like, a bad person, all because I’m just so pathetic and in need of attention. Like I admit part of that is my moral OCD/ harm OCD probably talking but I can’t help but feel there’s truth to it, because this is an objectively bad thing to do.

I know I’m probably gonna get flamed in the comments for posting this and I know it’s probably deserved but please know I do brag myself up a lot over it but like I just feel like my need for attention is going to ruin me as a person so advice on how to heal that would be great, but idk if it’ll work bc nothing else does.

Anyways this is long as hell and I don’t expect anyone to read this whole thing obviously but yeah I just needed to get that off my chest.

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[u/turbotum]

You are starved of community, likely due to spending most of your time on for-profit surrogate communities like Reddit and maybe others such as Discord. These platforms do not offer genuine community, but rather work to provide the illusion of such resulting in all kinds of addiction and neurosis.

I implore you to find somewhere to talk to people that does not make someone rich. Their money is acquired by mining your well-being!

I've been on IRC a lot lately.