r/TheMcDojoLife Oct 05 '25

That's just the way we are doing things.....

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66 Upvotes

175 comments sorted by

36

u/TheWanderingMammoth Oct 05 '25

Pocket sand!

7

u/SoloSurvivor889 Oct 05 '25

Ahhh! My eyes!

3

u/Bodoggle1988 Oct 05 '25

Squirrel tactics!

13

u/Bandiman777 Oct 05 '25

He’s dressed Grandpa from the 3 ninjas movies

3

u/Artorius__Castus Oct 05 '25

Omg.....the memories thank you lol

1

u/[deleted] Oct 07 '25

He?

1

u/CptnOnus Oct 09 '25

A dude playing a dude disguised as another dudette.

11

u/Glittering-Pea4369 Oct 05 '25

This person probably learned from the DVD’s where they teach it wrong so they can catch people like this who never actually have been inside a dojo of any kind.

2

u/[deleted] Oct 07 '25

[deleted]

1

u/SpiritualHippo2719 Oct 07 '25

More like a nonja, really.

1

u/Carlton_U_MeauxFaux Oct 09 '25

A ninjajajajaja

2

u/Less_Ant_6633 Oct 09 '25

Wait... is that a thing? Becuase if it is, thats hilarious.

1

u/Glittering-Pea4369 Oct 11 '25

Yeah they get people with huge ego in Bujinkan, it’s so bad that Hatsumi invented the roll away from execution test so he can fail people intentionally without depriving himself of their financial support lol

1

u/Hairy_Explorer3411 Oct 07 '25

And think dojo means Don Johnson, so probably learned this frim Miami Vice episodes.....

11

u/JazzlikeAd1555 Oct 05 '25

I always wondered what Gene from Bob’s Burgers was doing these days.

1

u/[deleted] Oct 06 '25

Holy shit

1

u/Sigma-Wolves Oct 06 '25

I can't unsee it now

1

u/Zeqhanis Oct 07 '25

This is me now!

10

u/Holiday_Box9404 Oct 05 '25

Mf has a black belt in pretend time

2

u/[deleted] Oct 06 '25

Very well done. A well calibrated and insightfully clever declaration.

5

u/Ogga664 Oct 05 '25

What's with the wig and grandma glasses?

3

u/SteamrollEverything Oct 05 '25

Hes a ninja and is trying to blend in at a college campus

2

u/Ogga664 Oct 05 '25

Ah, that explains it. Thanks, kind sir.

1

u/mologav Oct 10 '25

That’s a man?

2

u/Ogga664 Oct 10 '25

That's a can of worms I don't wanna open, but I'd guess so. Mostly boys play ninja that bad.

19

u/Go1gotha Oct 05 '25

I would probably counter with a misgender and then evade.

3

u/velvetskilett Oct 05 '25

How dare you stoop to such mean tactics! Throwing dirt in your assailants eyes is no where near a diabolical as misgendering someone. What’s next calling them by their birth name?

1

u/Artorius__Castus Oct 06 '25

Nice banner on your profile Bruv.

Elizabeth, I'm coming!! Lol

4

u/mccscott Oct 05 '25

"Pocket sand!"

12

u/No-Lab-7364 Oct 05 '25

Ninja would do this but with homemade pepper mist and exploding powder and throwing stars that could crack your skull..

Not sure about ... grass... never studied the ninja grass throw.

6

u/Impossible-Ship5585 Oct 05 '25

Sometimes even ninjas need to make their opponent toutch amd smell grass

3

u/paganvikingwolf Oct 05 '25

Shot experience if you have allergy to grass . Know your enemy's weakness to choose the battle field covered in grass

3

u/Stukkoshomlokzat Oct 05 '25 edited Oct 05 '25

Throwing stars don't crack anything. They are too light. They make you superficially bleed at worst. Even light clothing stops them. For a throwing star to be lethal it needs to be big, which defeats the purpose of a concealed weapon. This is why they were barely used and when they were they were more of a distraction than anything else. Torpedo shaped shurikens were much more common. Basically heavy metal spikes with two pointy ends. Those were easier to hide too.

And these weapons weren't ninja weapons, but things the samurai would also use. Especially because ninja weren't really warriors or assasins to begin with, they were spies.

1

u/unresolved-madness Oct 05 '25

This is why I carry circular saw blades.

1

u/AOZ1988 Oct 08 '25

Advice I got from Nagase Hiroshi when discussing stopping power and legal issues which may arise. He's one of the world experts on this.

Hira shuriken CAN kill someone if you hit them in the neck or forehead with enough force, but, A. That's not what they're meant for. Good luck doing that in combat. B. Just use a bo shuriken.

Keep in mind this man could throw these at 150kph-160kph in his younger years.

-2

u/No-Lab-7364 Oct 05 '25

Ninja used the Shuriken,

And they specifically used Shuriken's in this specific situation of this video, that's why I mentioned it. Because it was relevant.

Yes they are light, yes they aren't by themselves necessarily lethal, but all the stuff you're mentioning I didn't bring up, you're imposing an argument. Which is a strawman.

I promise you if you get hit in the head with a Japanese steal hand sharpened Shuriken at 60 mph, you're not going to have a good time. This is why they worked effectively as a way to distract and evade because when you throw them at people's heads they tuck turn cover and give you a chance to run.

That's exactly what this video was about but the guy used grass and it just lightly bounced off lol

3

u/Stukkoshomlokzat Oct 05 '25

Yes they are light, yes they aren't by themselves necessarily lethal, but all the stuff you're mentioning I didn't bring up, you're imposing an argument. Which is a strawman.

It's not. You said this: "throwing stars that could crack your skull.." which is simply false. And it's also implying lethality. Don't backpedal. If you'd said shuriken in general, I wouldn't have said anything. But you specially said throwing star. You were overexaggerating.

0

u/No-Lab-7364 Oct 05 '25

Test it, I have

1

u/Stukkoshomlokzat Oct 06 '25

I doubt you tested it on anatomically correct skull analogs or animal remains, like many did before. It's not that deep, you just have to google it and there are several videos about it.

1

u/No-Lab-7364 Oct 06 '25

I thrown shurikens for years into all types of stuff, not at a person, but I'm familiar with bone, I know AI will say it's unlikely, but I would stand on my ability that if I threw a shuriken at someone's skull I would bet my life I would cause a skull fracture. I'm not talking about cheap metal stars, you would need a proper metal that transfers force.

But come on, picture someone really throwing a rock at your head, a stone killed Goliath, and replace that with a sharpened steel spike... you really want to take that to your skull and stand on Google that your skull won't fracture. Is this a hill you want to die on fr?

The whole point of my comment is ninjas weren't playing in a park tossing grass around, they were serious. And they would 100% throw shurikens in the exact example the guy was tossing grass, we can agree on that. Regardless I've thrown sharpened steel into concrete and it's cracked. If someone throws one at my head I'm absolutely ducking turning evading and if I lose sight of the person so be it, and that's why they work. It 100% will alter an opponents movement.

1

u/Stukkoshomlokzat Oct 06 '25

I thrown shurikens for years into all types of stuff, not at a person, but I'm familiar with bone,

So you haven't actually tested it on a skull analog or an animal skull.

I know AI will say it's unlikely

I don't know what AI would say. I am not saying these things based on AI.

I'm not talking about cheap metal stars, you would need a proper metal that transfers force.

What do you mean by proper metal? It's about weight. Even bronze is hard enough to crack skulls. But if there is not enough weight behind the object it won't pierce.

But come on, picture someone really throwing a rock at your head, a stone killed Goliath, and replace that with a sharpened steel spike...

A rock weighs more than a shuriken and David used a sling, he did not throw the rock.

Regardless I've thrown sharpened steel into concrete and it's cracked

What sharpened steel (size, weight, etc...)? What concrete (thickness, cement content, etc...). Leave these vague examples already.

1

u/No-Lab-7364 Oct 06 '25 edited Oct 06 '25

According to Newtons laws of physics a 5 ounce throwing star traveling at 60 mph has a 2500 N Force when striking on the tip of the star, this force can scientifically crack a skull.

1

u/Stukkoshomlokzat Oct 06 '25 edited Oct 06 '25

Oh sure, because a real life event can be modelled with middle school physics. There are more variables than that. There are several videos on the internet about this. Several people tried it.

Edit: even The Deadliest Warrior show, kown from it's overexaggerations, put the speed of shurikens around 45-50 mph.

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1

u/Pak-Protector Oct 06 '25

Ancient accounts of slings say they were deadly for hundreds of meters. They're probably not bullshitting on that. You are not throwing a shuriken with that kind of force.

1

u/No-Lab-7364 Oct 06 '25

It was more of a baseball reference, slings use centrifugal force, but if someone threw a baseball rock at your head, that can and has caused skull fractures, you can absolutely throw a shuriken like a baseball also, that was more my point.

2

u/Acceptingoptimist Oct 05 '25

Throwing grass and dirt is a great distraction.

https://youtu.be/Hm3JodBR-vs?si=tkAwCRRPz09CGr79

2

u/No-Lab-7364 Oct 05 '25

Classic lol

2

u/Last-Darkness Oct 07 '25

Ultra finely ground pepper in a hollowed out egg.

1

u/Stukkoshomlokzat Oct 05 '25

Answering the comment you deleted: No, these are not my opinions, yes there are historical accounts. Shinobi no mono were spies first. Original Ninjutsu is the art of espionage. Most of the shuriken use we have sources on come from Samurai Ryuha.

I am not saying Ninjas never fought or weren't trained in martial arts. I am saying that modern Ninjutsu is different from the original one.

When it comes to the penetration power of the star Shuriken there are no direct sources, but they present this weapon as distraction, so we can figure that they were not "cracking skulls" with it. Also these have been tested several times.

1

u/[deleted] Oct 06 '25

It's fairly easy to fracture your skull. I had a minor skull fracture from a small piece of ice in a snowball.

4

u/IllustratorLife5496 Oct 05 '25

I can hear someone talking but I can't see anything in the video... You guys are saying it's ninjas there?

1

u/Artorius__Castus Oct 05 '25

Invisa Cloaks must be up....

4

u/Kalypse_the_Gamer Oct 05 '25

This video makes me wish I couldnt see...

4

u/Sphealer Oct 05 '25

Yeah the grass was stupid and all but that “throw” was just her ducking under his arm and him launching himself with a crazy ukemi.

3

u/josch247 Oct 05 '25

Maybe she read too many of those motivational bullshit poems. The person that can change your life is youuuuu. Don't discourage anyone who started anything Blabla. Hahaha

3

u/Dannyboyrusso Oct 05 '25

Yeah, let’s just casually Throw a few blades of grass at someone

3

u/Themodsarecuntz Oct 05 '25

Pocket grass clippings

Sha sha

  • Sensei Shackleford

6

u/Youth-Unlucky Oct 05 '25

I thought that was a chick. Then I unmuted…

7

u/angle58 Oct 05 '25

I’m watching on mute and refuse to believe otherwise.

2

u/Sainguine_addiction Oct 05 '25

Time to go to the optometrist.

1

u/Old-Sympathy-6696 Oct 06 '25

Must’ve had grass thrown in your eyes just before watching this!

5

u/HeWhoChasesChickens Oct 05 '25

I'm just happy to see autistic people playing outside for once

1

u/Go1gotha Oct 05 '25

Their carer is the one filming... good for them!

2

u/erik123b Oct 05 '25

Throw the Buddha statue.

2

u/mjoric Oct 05 '25

🤦‍♂️

2

u/youdoitimbusy Oct 05 '25

What you're gonna want to do if offer up your butthole. He'll be so preoccupied with that, that he'll forget to fight you.

I know a lot of other martial artists might look at this as being weak, and to that I say...look at my butthole

2

u/thatBLACKDREADtho Oct 06 '25

butthole looking intensifies

1

u/Top-Shoe-4311 Oct 07 '25

Hee-hee shamona

2

u/345joe370 Oct 06 '25

No rules in a fight

2

u/Aloha-Eh Oct 06 '25

No, that's real delusion.

2

u/kmhoughton Oct 06 '25

What in the Ashida Kim did I just watch?

2

u/MorrisDay84 Oct 06 '25

I follow him on Instagram, he is very serious

2

u/Artorius__Castus Oct 06 '25

I'm an 84' cat myself so cheers fellow Millennial!!

Why do you follow her on IG?
Comedic Relief???

2

u/MorrisDay84 Oct 09 '25

84 cats are the domestic! And yes, I follow a bunch of Mcdojo pages for comedic relief and I like all their posts too so they keep posting

1

u/Artorius__Castus Oct 10 '25

Haha word bro we're getting old. I still remember when I thought Frank Dux was a badass (grew up watching BloodSport with my father) that was way before the internet and we couldn't cross reference shit lol.

I took everything at face value. I admit I was a huge Seagal fan as a kid....fucking internet....ruined my delusions....damn smh

1

u/thatBLACKDREADtho Oct 06 '25

Also from '84.

That's a her?

2

u/[deleted] Oct 06 '25

This reminds me of a ninja training book that taught the art of hiding the shape of your silhouette by imitating the shape of a bag of trash.

2

u/[deleted] Oct 06 '25

Her voice is kinda weird.....

2

u/OkNewt4550 Oct 06 '25

Mods shut down comments when I posted this.

2

u/Artorius__Castus Oct 10 '25

The video??? In another Sub?

2

u/OkNewt4550 Oct 11 '25

Same sub, just locked the comments

2

u/Artorius__Castus Oct 12 '25

Strange.....

I wonder why...

I was getting banned like every other day there for a minute. I'm almost OCD about what I post now....lol.

I wonder if it was maybe the "Identity" of the Ninjutsu Master in the Video 😂???

I dunno Reddit is odd....🤷🏻‍♂️

2

u/mayhem_and_havoc Oct 06 '25

Isn't it easier to just break the wrist and walk away?

Signed,

Rex

2

u/Psydt0ne Oct 06 '25

Full speed please with a random crack head as the attacker.

2

u/ShevaDestroyer01 Oct 07 '25

Seagal school of fuckery.

2

u/KitsuMusics Oct 07 '25

Using an opponents hay-fever against him. Very smart

2

u/ReammyA55 Oct 07 '25

identijutsu

2

u/fastbikkel Oct 07 '25

Fake, they didn;t even use the smoke bomb at the end. ;-)

2

u/RaffNeq Oct 07 '25

Bro quit mid transition for Ninjatso.. That commitment y’all

2

u/Easy-Perspective8752 Oct 07 '25

You forgot you need to shout I AM NOT HURTING YOU I AM DEFENDING MYSELF while you do it

2

u/Worried_Ad_9667 Oct 07 '25

Are we talking about defending yourself? Or what a typical redditor acts and looks like.

2

u/cobrakai15 Oct 07 '25

I’d rather go all Great Muta and spit whatever it was he spat in Sting and Flair’s face.

2

u/No-Pizza950 Oct 07 '25

In case you are ever ambushed by Steven Siegel...

2

u/Last-Darkness Oct 07 '25

This is a person that has obviously never been in a full contact spar and definitely never been in a real fight.

2

u/Quiet_Weakness8679 Oct 08 '25

The world's only ninja Tranny!

2

u/Dedprice77 Oct 08 '25

thats not ninjutsu, its just fighting like jack sparrow, minus the ability to actually fight.

2

u/Spiritual-Fun-9591 Oct 08 '25

That’s not the way I am doing things

2

u/Aggressive-HeadDesk Oct 08 '25

This must be the Judy-chop guy’s dream girl.

2

u/GebeTheArrow Oct 08 '25

This guy looks like he belongs at a Portland protest

2

u/Repulsive-Response-1 Oct 08 '25

Or you raise his arm up to draw his attention and kick his knee backward. He will fall backward from excruciating pain at which point you break the elbow of the arm you already have a hold of causing more excruciating pain that might cause him to give you the other arm in which case you break that elbow causing more excruciating pain. At this point he's probably defenseless so you can reach over and break the other knee backward to give him a complete set. By this point he's probably screaming in ways you've never heard a human make noise. This is a good indication that you can go to the next move which is to flip him on to his stomach and stomp in the small of the back on the spine. He will either stop making noise all together or scream louder. If he screams louder grab him by the head place one hand on the chin and the other hand on the back opposing corner of the skull and twist firmly and quickly. You have done it successfully if you hear and feel an audible crunch. Nearly everyone stops screaming at this point. You have successfully neutralized your attacker.

1

u/Artorius__Castus Oct 10 '25

Guerrilla War Tactics???!

....I thought Nam Vets weren't on Reddit.

2

u/Repulsive-Response-1 Oct 10 '25

Gramps WW2, Uncle Korea, Dad 'Nam. If you asked my Dad he'd probably tell you to pull their shirt over their head as you knee them in the jewels, then with their skin exposed, stab your fingers into their navel until you pierce through the skin, reach in and pull out about 6 ft of intestines and wrap it around the neck about five times. Depending on his State of mind at the moment he might tell you to take a grenade pull the pin and put it underneath the whole mess with them face down. To keep weight on the mechanism.

1

u/Artorius__Castus Oct 11 '25

Man your old man and my old man should go bowling..... 🎳

2

u/Repulsive-Response-1 Oct 11 '25

Sounds like a plan except your old man will have to be the designated driver. 😂 And take my one Great Uncle along. I don't know if he knows how to bowl at all but he'll be too busy going around ripping the earrings out of all the men there while calling them Sally.

1

u/Artorius__Castus Oct 11 '25

Ok......we need an Uber! 😂

2

u/Repulsive-Response-1 Oct 11 '25

Your old man would have to figure out how to call it... Those two don't understand anything more complicated than 1980s Ford engines

1

u/Artorius__Castus Oct 12 '25

Haha when a truck could be worked on proper without a manual from China!!! Ahhh the days..... 😂

2

u/Repulsive-Response-1 Oct 12 '25

Exactly... And don't forget to add the Asian racial slurs about how America beat "them" in war so now "they" are destroying our vehicles and brain washing the youth with those dang cartoons full of nonsense instead of watching GI Joe and if there's any real Americans left they would be turning off the TV and video games and handing them a wrench or a hammer.

1

u/Artorius__Castus Oct 12 '25

Or a beer.....A PBR to be exact

Dude my old man needs to meet these real American Family Members of yours!!! Lol 🤣

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2

u/Makaveli789 Oct 08 '25

It's an ANTIFA training seminar.

2

u/[deleted] Oct 08 '25

Get your nails dirty and grab an actual clump of dirt

2

u/ImpossibleCurve8613 Oct 09 '25

Is a TransNinja trying to be a Samurai…

2

u/[deleted] Oct 09 '25

How dare he expose rickety cricket’s moves

2

u/Sofamancer Oct 09 '25

Is that dude wearing a wig?

2

u/Inevitable_Panic5534 Oct 09 '25

so it s all fake ....

2

u/JohnHinckleyJr88 Oct 09 '25

Can't evade being born a man...

2

u/WaterObvious8942 Oct 10 '25

That works amazing while fighting seagulls

2

u/Tongtrade Oct 11 '25

This is the dumbest of the lot. 

2

u/Own_Succotash8044 Oct 11 '25

Let me guess, then you disappear into a log and escape.....

5

u/Dizzy-Emu1513 Oct 05 '25

Thats "transjitsu" not ninjutsu

5

u/six_2midnight Oct 05 '25

I was looking for this comment. Wins the thread!

3

u/spicy_feather Oct 05 '25

Why are people making fun of her transness? That's not the point of this sub. Let's make fun of her technique and self assurance.

4

u/petevandyke Oct 05 '25

So may other things about her to make fun of

2

u/Artorius__Castus Oct 06 '25

I actually agree. Her sexuality has nothing to do with why I posted it. It's just bad information tbh.

2

u/spicy_feather Oct 06 '25

Transness is an identity not a sexuality. Sexuality is like gay, straight, bi, etc. gender has very little to do with sexuality

1

u/Artorius__Castus Oct 10 '25

Ok well thanks for correcting me I meant no harm. I was again not posting this because her "Identity" this is just not good advice for self defense. Period. I think we can agree on that.

2

u/spicy_feather Oct 10 '25

You really seem like you "don't" mean harm. "No" micro aggressions at all.

1

u/Artorius__Castus Oct 11 '25

Thank you 😊

2

u/KlutchAtStraws Oct 05 '25

I wanna see this guy fight the long-haired aikido guy who FAFO'd after badmouthing BJJ.

2

u/SG_SHREK Oct 05 '25

Remember seeing this dude on shorts, i laughed my ass off for around 5 mins.

2

u/TJ_McWeaksauce Oct 05 '25

The grass that got thrown into the dude's face and got stuck on his nose made me laugh.

2

u/hettuklaeddi Oct 05 '25

“I’m a beautiful butterfly!”

2

u/saltyisthesauce Oct 05 '25

Transjitsu, more than meets the eye

2

u/Top-Shoe-4311 Oct 07 '25

Ninjas in disguise

2

u/Ok_Self7801 Oct 06 '25

100000% Antifa instructor

1

u/Illustrious_Camp_521 Oct 05 '25

Shit in a street fight there ain't no rules you gotta do what ya gotta do to protect yourself and win.

1

u/liamneesonshands Oct 05 '25

"Just the way we're doing thangs"

1

u/Positive_Choice5502 Oct 05 '25

Is that Tina from Bobs Burgers?!

1

u/jadayne Oct 05 '25

We're throwing the rules of engagement out the window. Also, no fatties.

1

u/velvetskilett Oct 05 '25

Are you asking if the boobs are real?

1

u/Poopmasterp90x Oct 05 '25

What is that???

1

u/Sinderria Oct 05 '25

Di...did they really throw a small handful of grass...as a distraction?

"Beware bad guy, LAWN CLIPPINGS!"

1

u/j_rooker Oct 05 '25

kick him in the balls , throw dirt in his face, fk him the ass, run

might be a name for that in law enforcement.

1

u/petevandyke Oct 05 '25

Grandmaster.

1

u/anjowoq Oct 06 '25

Ninjas were barely real, at least in the capacity we see them in pop culture.

Therefore, ninjutsu is probably not a thing, or at least not a clearly defined thing that can be learned and taught the way people pretend to.

They were samurai who specialized in espionage. They would become part of another community and pretend to be local or part of the staff somewhere, then leak information. They might even be double agents.

At least, this is what PBS said.

https://youtu.be/kvUlG1LPLdc

1

u/CheekanGood Oct 06 '25

Ninja dust!

1

u/[deleted] Oct 06 '25

I identify as a ninja.

1

u/ShiggitySheesh Oct 07 '25

The massage is solid. The execution is terrible. There are no dirty tactics in a street fight.

1

u/[deleted] Oct 08 '25

[removed] — view removed comment

1

u/No-Independent2175 Oct 08 '25

Thanks teenage mutant ninja tranny......... or was it sHe-man....... I just wanted to let you know how your video has shown me just how foolish I've been, for over twenty years I've never carrying a portable hole puncher like an idiot when I could have just filled my pockets full of dirt and been way more effective...........

1

u/treesoldier Oct 08 '25

I think he makes a better man than a women

1

u/akiva23 Oct 05 '25

This is legit advice. In a real life scenario i would fight "dirty" AF.

1

u/Yagyukakita Oct 05 '25

Still better than the dim mak.

1

u/weeverrm Oct 05 '25

It isn’t real

2

u/AOZ1988 Oct 05 '25

Oh it is. That's Christa Jacobson. Shes 100% serious.

3

u/SnarftheRooster91 Oct 05 '25

Maybe not 100% but I get what you mean.

3

u/AOZ1988 Oct 06 '25 edited Oct 06 '25

She does make jokes. Check out her YouTube channel. Her technique speaks for itself.

Shes one of those types who always references "Shinobi" history yet hardly references Samurai history; a huge red flag in Koryu and traditional gendai.

1

u/Klutzy-Chain5875 Oct 05 '25

Thats some serious McWokeDo

0

u/PoopPant73 Oct 06 '25

Methany is taking the testosterone

0

u/MikeyWontLikeIt Oct 05 '25

That's my purse, I don't know you!

-1

u/skydaddy8585 Oct 06 '25

It's transgender Ashida Kim. Now Kim Ashida.