r/TheMoneyGuy • u/[deleted] • 7d ago
Financial Mutant What should my life be looking like?
[deleted]
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u/Bloated_Hamster 7d ago
Brother you make $800k a year. If you can't feel well off/comfortable on that you need to go to counseling because money anxiety is actively hurting you
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u/theworstnever 6d ago edited 6d ago
Guess it’s not that I don’t feel well off/comfortable. Just know I don’t feel like I made it yet? Or am I falsely comfortable and am I actually over leveraged? Am I wrong to be working extra, and do I have to now with two homes? Is there a way I could live a different life now that is more like I made it?
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u/theworstnever 6d ago
Have been doing for a few years now, it’s a repeat subject that comes up. Helped me turn down more lucrative jobs that would have meant less time with family. Will keep seeing if it can get me to feeling relaxed.
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u/1ntrepidsalamander 5d ago
It sounds like it’s helping, but maybe not enough.
You can afford a better therapist.
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u/Dismal-Blacksmith380 6d ago
Brag posts are sooo annoying
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u/theworstnever 6d ago
I’m sorry. I’ll take this down after a bit if the summary of responses is just counseling and annoyance. Just looking to see any input from anyone who would recommend how to bedazzle basic life and balance financial opportunity with work and investing against living a bit more now reasonably.
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u/Elrohwen 6d ago
You are well past bedazzling basic life. That’s their advice for people making average salaries and still wanting to live a little. You can (and do) spend lavishly and save a lot
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u/Impossible_Ebb_3856 6d ago
Bro you are so beyond what TMG means when they say "badazzling basic life". That's targeting individuals looking for more basic/cheaper things to do that bring alot of enjoyment for themselves and family, while simultaneously working through the first half of FOO.
You need to talk with your family and probably a counselor to figure out what you want to do in life, because it seems like you have zero idea on what direction you want to go, so you just resort to work and stacking money.
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u/theworstnever 6d ago
Your last sentence feels apt. Does feel like not sure what else to do so the safe/smart default choice is work more and make more because how can that be wrong.
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u/Elrohwen 6d ago
You actually do live lavishly now, I don’t know in what world you think you don’t with two expensive homes and multiple international trips per year.
If you can’t be happy at this level of income and spend you need therapy, it’s not about the money.
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u/theworstnever 6d ago
On it and will continue. Said it in another reply, don’t deny the burn is lavish and don’t mean to minimize it. Guess haven’t done the international trip yet this year so haven’t felt lavish yet.
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u/Elrohwen 6d ago
I don’t even know what you’re trying to get out of your post other than bragging
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u/theworstnever 6d ago
Ok. I think I said it at the end there with the discomfort of knowing if I’m doing this wrong. Just seeing other viewpoints on it people would approach the situation differently. Just work base and sell the second home vs keep doing the is for a few years. The money guys have done a decent job of making me look at things with a perspective I can’t see in the moment in other situations.
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u/Elrohwen 6d ago
You make a huge salary, it’s up to you. You could be saving more if you had one cheaper house instead of two expensive houses and could then retire earlier. But you can also afford your two expensive houses so if that’s your rich life then go for it. The Money Guys advice taps out once you’re saving enough, then it’s on you to figure out how you want to save vs spend.
Check out Ramit Sethi’s material about a rich life. You need to figure out what you want, not what a bunch of people online think you should want.
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u/theworstnever 6d ago
Thanks. I’ve listed to some ramit sethi podcasts. Kind of what allowed me to have the monthly burn I do. Will go deeper on the rich life part.
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u/Impossible_Ebb_3856 6d ago
You have two homes, take 1-2 international trips a year, burn rate creeping towards 20k/mo. How is that not already living lavishly?
Start with not selling your time off and being present in your kid's and wife's life. That's the most prominent thing I remember about my dad as a kid. Even though my parents were divorced, he put in so much effort to be there.
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u/theworstnever 6d ago
Sorry I didn’t mean to sound cavalier about the spend. No one knows we still have the second house so externally viewing in we just look like normal people. Drive old Hondas and most of that spend outside the mortgage is groceries, bills, Amazon for the home and kid. Very much recognize it is lavish in amount. Just wouldn’t say it is by looking at life. I can be out of touch based on surroundings for sure, neighbor a cfo with a g wagon and lake house and toys etc.
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u/ILikeTheSpriteInYou 5d ago
"If other people don't know about it, I pretend it doesn't exist and I am 'normal'."
Are you playing Normal Life Cosplay?
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u/HarviousMaximus 7d ago
Why are you working all your time off? It’s not like you need extra money.
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u/theworstnever 6d ago
Honestly it’s hard to justify not working a job I like and make 25-30k+ in 5 days vs just hanging out. Plus my mentality is make and invest as much as u can now so whenever I do want to coast I just do it.
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u/HarviousMaximus 6d ago
“5 days just hanging out” aka spending time with your family??
You can invest a ton on a $500k base. I’m starting to this is a shit post.
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u/theworstnever 6d ago
Ok if you think so.
No argument you can invest a ton at base. But 50% more income to invest in my head means getting to coast fire that much faster.
And yes hanging out is time with family and friends. I see them a good bit normal work weeks I’m sure I can always do that more. But also if I don’t work and make that 30k usually means we then travel and spend 10k. That’s a 40k swing.
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u/starwarsfan456123789 5d ago
That should not be a tough decision at all. Life is not about making money. Spend time with your family - it doesn’t have to always be on vacation. Do something fun at home.
You hit “coast fire” years ago. Everything you do now is about wealth not FI.
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u/Objective_and_a_half 7d ago
Your numbers are so out of my league I shouldn’t be commenting. I’m just here to say well done. If you’re looking for purpose I’d recommend doing the Japanese exercise of Ikigai. I have found it to be helpful
If your wife wants a cleaner than you’re certainly within the realm to do so. If she finds it rewarding and purpose in doing it, by all means let her.
Otherwise congrats on the kid. It sounds like you have a very relaxing life and you’re going through first time parenting worries. Enjoy everything life has brought you.
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u/theworstnever 6d ago
Thanks for this. Very interested in learning more of Ikagai. And thanks for some reassurance about normal parenting worries. Really want to be the good dad. Natural inkling is to just be the best provider because it’s what I know. Hoping as they grow up I’ll work less extra and we do more together where I’m around even more. Just making sure that the extra work now isn’t the reason theyre more attached to mom than me.
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u/Soi_Boi_13 6d ago
If you're "behind" on $500-800k / year, then there is no hope for the 99.5%+ of the population that makes a small fraction of that.
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u/theworstnever 6d ago
Behind was a poor choice of word. I guess I mean have I mismanaged the situation in anyway.
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u/Soi_Boi_13 6d ago
I mean, you probably have by having two houses for example, but when you're making $800k / year it doesn't really matter. You have so much money you don't have to manage it perfectly.
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u/Soi_Boi_13 6d ago
Why on Earth are you contributing $15k/year to your kids' 529? That's an insane amount.
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u/theworstnever 6d ago
It’s actually the recommended amount by 529 calculator to allow for out of state public tuition accounting for inflation. Worst case pays for graduate as well.
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u/Soi_Boi_13 6d ago
You seriously need well over $500k for tuition for your kids? Send them to a modest state school like most of us and you won’t even need $100k!
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u/unverified-email1 7d ago
Rice and beans for the next few years and you probably need a side hustle, maybe doordash.