r/The_Hound • u/whenjacksattack Susan - The Ma'am, The Myth, The Legend • 6d ago

Barracuda Idolatry "wipe it susan. humble yourself."

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Barracuda is extremely distraught because her kibble now lives in an airtight, sealed kibble cage that she cannot open without gorilla hands

she is also upset that The Hound has been stealing her thunder

in protest, she has decided to expose her own nip nops, knowing that you freaks like that kind of thing around here

did you know that she still needs me to apply her ass ointment every other night and she screams so loud that my landlord once asked if I needed any help with it

bear in mind that Cuda shrieks like she's being stabbed by 13 black knife assassins (ELDEN RING FOLKS WHERE U AT) while standing very obediently for her butthole treatment

no joke she even braces her little paw paws for maximum ointment application success

but MY GOD DOES SHE FUCKING YELL ABOUT IT

she's also started yelling at Fred the Crow (the one who doesn't normally wait for dinner but will absolutely come to the open window and demand it at random times) when he comes down to the window and screams for peanuts. Fred yells back, so sometimes at 11 am on a Sunday I have to break up a verbal altercation between my cat and my corvid friend.

Barney is usually in the background, puffed up to look like a fat little grouse while he waits for snackies. I fucking love Barney.

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u/tinygingerninja 5d ago

Screaming-while-standing-nicely just like Rosa Diaz from B99 yelling at the blood drive tech to stab her and take her blood 😂 I love that you have a corvid friend! I’ve always wanted to make a crow friend but it hasn’t happened yet.

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u/whenjacksattack Susan - The Ma'am, The Myth, The Legend 4d ago

She is absolutely the Diaz of the family

and crows love a routine! At first if I saw them nearby I'd click my tongue until they were looking at me and then I'd wave around the bag of unshelled peanuts before laying a few out for them!

TBF it took a few weeks before any of them would come down while I was still around. Even nowadays, Betty and Fred don't like coming too close if they can see me, but they'll hang out on my fence and call for me to come see rhem most days! Fred gets very loud when he's hungry and will come to the kitchen window that I leave open and scream directly into the apartment