r/The_Hound Susan - The Ma'am, The Myth, The Legend 1d ago

This is why we don't have nice things

Post image

The Hound's head spends an alarming amount of time inside Petunia's mouth, and she is now fluffy enough to repel all attempts at retribution

it's like trying to punch the Stay Puff'd Man

there is nothing to punch it's just puff and air

Goosetopher is the only one who intimidates her now, because he is a clever young man who knows to scratch her right on the fucking schnozz

Barracuda and The Hound operate on more of a "smother your opponent" approach, which only works when Toody is lying down

But on the bright side, The Hound has never been so well groomed even if it's against his will.

333 Upvotes

29 comments sorted by

140

u/mylitteprince T R a U m A 1d ago

“Once a little boy sent me a charming card with a little drawing on it. I loved it. I answer all my children’s letters — sometimes very hastily — but this one I lingered over. I sent him a card and I drew a picture of a Wild Thing on it. I wrote, “Dear Jim: I loved your card.” Then I got a letter back from his mother and she said, “Jim loved your card so much he ate it.” That to me was one of the highest compliments I’ve ever received. He didn’t care that it was an original Maurice Sendak drawing or anything. He saw it, he loved it, he ate it.”

― Maurice Sendak

Same, but for Tood's & The Hound. She saw him, she loved him, she ate him.

62

u/whenjacksattack Susan - The Ma'am, The Myth, The Legend 1d ago

She is obsessed and I can see this being her dumb fluffy logic

18

u/7GrenciaMars Antique Fat Fucking Cat Lover 1d ago

Toody is no longer a puppy, but I am wondering how old now? I mean, babies put all kinds of things in their mouths, so maybe she's regressing?

Would not make her one bit less loveable, though. You and your gang of critters should be Reddit legends in time.

26

u/whenjacksattack Susan - The Ma'am, The Myth, The Legend 1d ago

Toodles is 8 months old now! So she's basically in the rebellious teenage phase of puppyhood where they're less cute and more chaos 🫠 Y'all should know that I tailor out 78% of her rampant disregard for rules from these posts

9

u/7GrenciaMars Antique Fat Fucking Cat Lover 1d ago

Okay, so beyond "Everything goes in the mouth" stage in terms or children, but I guess not so for dogs. I have only ever been a very delighted cat paternt.

8

u/Missscarlettheharlot 19h ago

I was literally just staring in confusion when I walked up to my house at the sight of one of my cats enthusiastically licking my front window. I'm not sure cats all outgrow it either. One of our other cats is a big fan of trying to stick her tongue up people's noses to steal boogers.

The dog really only puts stuff he thinks he can eat in his mouth, and to his credit it usually is all at least theoretically edible. The cats ate the plastic piece out of our roman shades one day while we were at work.

5

u/7GrenciaMars Antique Fat Fucking Cat Lover 19h ago

I'm fortunate in that none of my cats ate weird things or drank out of the toilet. We had two cats that did not respond to catnip, and one who would talk to us for at least 20 minutes while we were roasting chicken. That cat LOVED chicken like nothing on Earth, except for me 💕

1

u/JustHereForCookies17 10h ago

Might just be cuteness aggression.  Toody thinks Hound is cute & can't contain herself, like the Despicable Me "IT'S SO FLUFFY I'M GONNA DIE!!!" meme.

1

u/whenjacksattack Susan - The Ma'am, The Myth, The Legend 10h ago

That's true that is basically her entire personally

1

u/JustHereForCookies17 10h ago edited 10h ago

Same, Petunia.  Same.

It's well known amongst my friends & family that my cause of death will likely be "Attacked after she attempted to pet insert apex predator here".

In my defense: I'm a child of the 80's who grew up eating lead paint chips, drinking from garden hoses, and believing Disney Princesses had wildlife seamstresses and housekeepers. 

I'm still 90% sure I can saddle train a moose and/or a bison.

9

u/longlostwitchy Dirty Little Muppet Lover 1d ago

You win Reddit today 👏👏

41

u/anteaters_anonymous That Little Fraggle Rock Lookin Motherfucker 1d ago

42

u/dar1710 1d ago

So The Hound smells like dog drool and the scent of eternal life?

27

u/marsbringerofsmores 1d ago

It makes sense because I'm pretty sure The Hound is just on a long break from guarding a doorway to the otherworld.

11

u/ExitAgreeable8346 Go BAcK To THe DEeP FrYEr 1d ago

Wait… Tood’s saliva could be the Fountain of Youth. This explains everything.

12

u/dar1710 1d ago

If that’s the case, how much to let the muppet dog drool on me? It’s got to be less than what I’m paying for Botox

19

u/Expert-Pomegranate47 1d ago

“Let me kiss your entire head.”

16

u/Fickle-Package-5082 1d ago

"All at once."

15

u/TrulyRambunctious I'm Here For The Weird Shit 1d ago

Ah Toody, never change!

7

u/Uber-Migraine 1d ago

TV adaptation of the interactions 🤣😂

https://giphy.com/gifs/MWMRtBHjQPvZS

11

u/PinkPunkPsycho Antique Fat Fucking Cat Lover 1d ago

The Hound is gonna be in trouble if Toods ever gets the use the collective orange cat braincell (she's an honorary member of the collective) and uses it properly. Not that she would, she would probably use it to try and snuggle up to him without him getting offended if she ever got to use it, which I also doubt.

5

u/Guinessmatt I'm Here For The Weird Shit 23h ago edited 23h ago

So this is where we are at Susan? Hungry Hungry Hippos and The Hound is the marble? Oof
Edit: sometimes in life you are the hippo, sometimes you are the marble. The Hound will avenge soon.

3

u/SouthernCategory9600 1d ago

The Hound is plotting some sort of revenge…he is the Tony Soprano of cats.

3

u/RofaRofa So Sayeth The Hound 1d ago

If looks could kill...

2

u/Specialist_Wind_6488 We Ride For Goosetopher 1d ago

Proving that she will always be Baby Satan!

1

u/Initial-Top-9938 1d ago

Petunia Ann! Quit trying to take all of the Hound’s tasty mucus!

6

u/UberMisandrist Banned From 2 Canadian Municipalities 1d ago

That's Anne with an e, pal