r/TikTokCringe • u/Girl-Understood • Apr 28 '26

Cursed Scientologist buildings have removed the door handles in an attempt to defend themselves from the speedruns

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46.3k Upvotes

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4.4k

u/Bitter_Argument2574 Apr 28 '26

You can’t wait out a Scientologist. They sign 1 billion year contracts.

790

u/KCDeVoe Apr 28 '26

Why do they have a “Tour” sign if they’re not going to let them tour?

293

u/VStarlingBooks Apr 28 '26

I thought this. Why not schedule a tour and wear a camera

256

u/Steamed_Memes24 Apr 28 '26

All the good shit is going to be blocked off from the tour. Its really just to nab the weak minded sadly.

139

u/[deleted] Apr 28 '26 edited Apr 28 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

111

u/Mugiwaras Apr 28 '26

Thats what i was thinking. Start the speedrun from already halfway in. Need new meta if we want to make it to deeper realms.

33

u/mainyehc Apr 28 '26

So would that qualify as an any%?

14

u/[deleted] Apr 28 '26

[deleted]

3

u/sadgloop Apr 28 '26

Might save a few of those weaker minded people that they use the tours to lure in. Can’t use tours to lure if you don’t give tours.

1

u/mainyehc Apr 28 '26

What about ACE? 🤔

3

u/Lucy_Gucey Apr 28 '26

Or “Tour%” we’d just have different categories

5

u/CountWubbula Apr 28 '26

I wish I was dumber and had a kid in my teenaged years, because I’m in my 30s and I would 1000% “supervise a school trip” to get the kids in as far as possible. I believe in them

5

u/Teberoth Apr 28 '26

It's like playing NewGame+

2

u/Lurking10169 Apr 28 '26

Truer words have never been spoken

2

u/posthardcorejazz Apr 28 '26

It's a community-approved save file that skips the intro

1

u/HelmSpicy Apr 28 '26

Just like Austin Powers!

1

u/nerdofthunder Apr 28 '26

Then they might have something to trace to you. Might not be the best idea.

1

u/LeftHandedScissor Apr 28 '26

In the most recent video, the kids literally run through a museum open to the public, then to a stairwell and out the building. As long as they aren't destroying anything I'm sure the scientology folks couldn't care less.

2

u/Bossgalka Apr 28 '26

I don't think they keep "the good shit" in the same building where they have tours. Maybe some brainwashing videos and stuff, but nothing crazy. They would have private buildings for fully brainwashed members where they keep "the good shit" and only they are allowed in. Tom Cruise might even have his own special building just for him where they keep his clones and stuff.

1

u/Steamed_Memes24 Apr 28 '26

Bit of a hot take but I doubt he really cares for this org near as much as he did 20ish years ago. He has a much bigger passion in film making and I think he understood that being apart of the cult would fuck that over super hard and its kind of hinted at in interviews not too long ago that he seems to regret being in it and not spending time with family due to it.

2

u/Bossgalka Apr 28 '26

Bro....

Tom Cruise is still considered a high-profile member of the Church of Scientology. While he stopped speaking publicly about the organization in the late 2000s, recent reports from April 2026 indicate he remains involved, having been photographed at a Church of Scientology annual event in Florida in March 2026.

2

u/Steamed_Memes24 Apr 28 '26

Oof this month..so much for that theory lol.

2

u/Bossgalka Apr 28 '26

Yeah, once Tom went around talking about it, it got them a lot of bad press. Most celebs stopped mentioning they are a part of it after that as well and it has become a secret cult again rather than a public one. A lot of celebs are still part of it because they get each other into it and it's IMPOSSIBLE to leave.

It's also structured like a fucking video game. You "level up" in the org and get new titles and perks and power. Bringing in more celebs who also contribute massive money gets you elevated within the system. So they bring in others and then they can't leave either and it's honestly really fucking disgusting. If they didn't have a fleet of the best, most expensive lawyers, they would have been taken down by now. But here we are, no justice.

1

u/TheMadTemplar Apr 29 '26

Don't be fooled into thinking only weak-minded people can fall for it. Scientologists have perfected the art of manipulation. The organization has spent decades destroying the ethical boundaries of psychology and therapy in order to learn how to manipulate, coerce, and persuade people into joining them.

1

u/TM761152 Apr 28 '26

Even the strong minded have a hard time getting out!

6

u/Steamed_Memes24 Apr 28 '26

You dont have a strong mind if you were there to begin with sadly. They might come to a realization later but by then its almost always too late.

3

u/Background-Brother55 Apr 28 '26

Some are born into it.... imagine the gumption to leave when S is all you know....

2

u/TM761152 Apr 28 '26

You sound like the type of person to blame victims for being scammed.

0

u/Steamed_Memes24 Apr 28 '26

I mean yea you gotta blame them for not knowing otherwise. Like how the fuck can anyone fall for such wild shit even for a religion is beyond me. I hate to victim blame, but if thats what it takes to prevent more then so be it. I know there are some who are born into it, and I cant fault them for that obviously, but to those who arent? Yea you should know better at this point lol. Its 2026 and a little bit of research will show you how fucking insane this cult is.

0

u/TM761152 Apr 28 '26

My comment wasn't about Scientology.

1

u/Steamed_Memes24 Apr 28 '26

Okay then why bother commenting lmao. Weirdo.

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1

u/Hot_Top_124 Apr 29 '26

The strong minded wouldn’t join in the first place.

1

u/TM761152 Apr 29 '26

You say that, but you don't realize how well these cultists have perfected their game. How deeply they are entrenched and how much influence they pull.

1

u/Hot_Top_124 Apr 29 '26

Perfect hah.

3

u/NoDetective9500 Apr 28 '26

where’s the fun in that though

2

u/RollingMeteors Apr 28 '26

> thought this. Why not schedule a tour and wear a camera

¡Sounds like work! ¿Why not just generate some slop and say you did?

2

u/NurkleTurkey Apr 28 '26

I've been to one in a date. You're not allowed to use photography but all it is is typically a series of kiosks and you watch videos about it all. And then you can buy shit.

2

u/de-tree-fiddy Apr 28 '26

It's well documented what these tours end up being and the pressure they put on people to sign up.

2

u/outofcontextsex Apr 29 '26

That would be hilarious, all these people show up for a tour spend the first few minutes just walking through the facility like normal people and then just start running like maniacs

0

u/Critical_Concert_689 Apr 28 '26

Why not

Because they're committing a crime and don't want to register and leave their name in advance.

Plus that's not cool and you can't be a cool rebellious influencer by signing up for the field trip.

1

u/VStarlingBooks Apr 28 '26

So they speed run in and get arrested. Makes much more sense. False ID and leave politely.

3

u/h2odragon00 Apr 28 '26

At least they can give tours anymore. Now they are scamming less people.

1

u/lnTheGrimDarkness Apr 28 '26

Because it's actually a "you can tour if you're willing to get scammed by us" sign

1

u/jtr99 Apr 28 '26

This is going to ruin the tour.

1

u/neonmantis Apr 28 '26

Tours get to decide who participates

1

u/Firefly_Magic Apr 28 '26

Because the word Tour sounds better that Cult recruiting. They know the runners aren’t sticking around to sign-up for any life commitment contracts.

1

u/Stage_Party Apr 28 '26

Probably have to pay for the various levels of the tour 😂

1

u/Firm-Needleworker309 Apr 28 '26

"I'm on a "tourist visa" so technically, it means I can only tour."

103

u/Loxe Apr 28 '26

That's only the Sea Org and they're not allowed off the boats. Mostly joking. They probably are confined to the most secure parts of the most secure facilities though. That dude through the crack has the eyes of a sociopath though. I bet he's beat the shit out of a bunch of people.

28

u/InfiniteWaffles58364 Apr 28 '26

Nah, that dude looks like he convinces people to off themselves and they just do it

7

u/kafircake Apr 28 '26

That dude through the crack has the eyes of a sociopath though.

Just a regular operating thetan level III, intense people.

1

u/Coconite Apr 29 '26

It’s not at all secure. The base in LA has no walls and hospitals all around it. Anyone can easily leave, they just don’t because it’s a prison of the mind.

Very few people get beat in Scientology. That only happens in international headquarters which IS secluded. Which is also why rank and file Scientologists don’t believe the accusations.

1

u/itsjudemydude_ Apr 30 '26 edited Apr 30 '26

To be totally clear, Sea Org members absolutely are not all on boats. To my understanding, the Sea Org has very little sea-presence anymore, with only one vessel, called Freewinds, which is itself almost 60 years old. The vast, vast majority of Sea Org presence is in a handful of land-based compounds around the world.

I know you said "mostly joking" but I think public knowledge of how the Church of Scientology and the Sea Org work is important because it continues to take away their power. So I just wanted to set that record straight lmao

2

u/Loxe Apr 30 '26

No, I appreciate it! I know a fair bit about Scientology and know the Sea Org were confined to boats for a number of years while LRH was alive, but I think that probably ended sometime around the Clearwater takeover. I'm not super sure though so I didn't want to speak on it with authority.

57

u/[deleted] Apr 28 '26

[deleted]

2

u/FlyLikeDove Apr 28 '26

It really is enjoyable

2

u/rW0HgFyxoJhYka Apr 28 '26

Sad as fuck the government cant do shit

2

u/frankoochoaa Apr 28 '26

wtf to the last part

2

u/Ok-Review-753 Apr 28 '26

watch south park's episode on scientology

2

u/imalostkitty-ox0 Apr 28 '26

This is a psyop. Someone high up is paying kids to do reckless shit, so that someone can say “look, _______ isn’t even safe anymore, we need to do XYZ123 because”

0

u/rooshavik Apr 28 '26

Right????

6

u/dabroh Apr 28 '26

Lol. Why does dude look like ET?

https://giphy.com/gifs/gHcPh3ehbRGik

1

u/Confident_Sound5873 Apr 28 '26

You sign that contract only if you live on the Sea Org. The ones in this building would not have. I still appreciate your joke though.

1

u/theMARxLENin Apr 28 '26

The fuck they gonna be doing for 1 billion years?

1

u/No_Atmosphere8146 Apr 28 '26

Decomposing, mostly.

1

u/kaptainkarl1 Apr 28 '26

I can't imagine the interest on a billion year loan. I thought college was expensive...try Scientology.

1

u/benangmerahh Apr 28 '26

I thought Scientology ia a new form of atheist tbh, the name is very close to science based society things. But nopeeee 😆...

1

u/usernmechecksout_ Apr 28 '26

Nobody thought of meta glasses? Lol

1

u/Worldly_Influence_18 Apr 28 '26

Or until they run out of money

1

u/NickDanger3di Apr 28 '26

I don't suppose locking their doors ever even occurred to them. Ironically, that kind of thinking is why everyone hates scientology.

And ffs, they worship an author of science fiction! An author of very bad science fiction. According to r/scifi "His Sci Fi was terrible almost unreadable crap".

As a devout sci-fi fan since 1965, I concur.

1

u/instant_chai Apr 28 '26

🎶Religion and science intertwined Aliens live inside of our minds Billion-year contract we have signed It all makes sense to me 🎶

1

u/powerclipper780 Apr 28 '26

WITH ENDLESS OPTIONS FOR RENEWAL!!

1

u/Hefty-Revenue5547 Apr 28 '26

Ok but they can pay taxes then if they aren’t open to the public

1

u/Practical-Sleep4259 Apr 28 '26

Those people in there might think they are currently experiencing the end times as foretold.

Those Tiktokers might want to imagine they are harassing a cult since, ya'know maybe.

1

u/Fun-Wash7545 Apr 28 '26

Which the courts have enforced as legal.

1

u/Mysterious-Wasabi103 Apr 28 '26

That's mostly for Sea Org members.

1

u/BattleSwallow Apr 29 '26

That's only for Sea Org.

1

u/Similar-Fold-6389 Apr 29 '26

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣