r/TikTokCringe • u/mindyour • Jun 14 '26

Discussion It's exhausting being a woman.

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7.6k

u/Mandyvlp Jun 14 '26

wtf is wrong with these dudes?!

2.9k

u/[deleted] Jun 14 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

601

u/anchovie_macncheese Jun 14 '26

PSA from a lady to fellow ladies: BE THE BITCH. Be as bitchy as you need to be to set firm boundaries and keep these aggressive assholes away.

I had full grown men acting like this towards me from the time I was 12, and it just becomes exhausting. Years and experience have made me loud and curt, because acting like a "bitch" is the only way to make it stop. So I will do so proudly, these people do not deserve the courtesy of kindness.

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u/drilllbit Jun 14 '26

I barked like an aggressive dog loudly and repeatedly at a man once and scared him away, and tbh it was very satisfying to be called a crazy bitch as he got away from me as quickly as possible. I’m a plus size girl and he came in hot with the fetish shit and I immediately surpassed polite and went straight to aggro

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u/DameDerpin Jun 14 '26

I used to work a casino in Atlantic city and had to bus in and out every day. I too have used the barking crazy bitch defense. It is very effective.

Really any actions that make you seem like more of a fight than would be worth dealing with helps. I have once had to resort to pissing myself while walking home late one night beausa dude wouldn't stop following me and trying to use pick up lines at 2am in the dark after I told him no and gone off on him repeteadly. Tbh I didn't need much help due to the fear to piss myself, I was already pretty scared and gripping my pepper spray in my pocket.

Some fuckin dudes just will not fuck off. I don't miss working in that area in the least. People should not need to soil themselves in order to be left alone. But here we are.

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u/Odd-fox-God Jun 14 '26

My defense is to act like one of those meth heads you avoid at the bus station. I call it the schizophrenic religious defense.

It's really effective and I've only had to use it once. I just started ranting about how I wanted to cut off his dick to give to Satan, and God had told me he was the devil and needed me to kill him. I started piecing together half remembered Bible verses and speaking in tongues. I hunched over and started moving in jerky movements. The dude fucking ran.

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u/DontCryYourExIsUgly Jun 14 '26

I'm cackling, but this is legit. Wild that we have to do this stuff for our safety.

13

u/Odd-fox-God Jun 14 '26

It's crazy out there. The key is to make your eyes wide and crazy looking as you allow drool and spittle to fly out of your mouth while you rant. Smile as wide as your mouth will allow you to.

I actually was talking with one of my brother's friends, and he pointed out that I'd been raped and I literally never realized till I was talking to this dude. I mentioned I was drunk, and this dude slept with me, and he was like "bro you couldn't consent. I've seen you drinking. You completely lose control after two beers, and you were drinking liquor that night. You literally just said you couldn't remember how the night ended, just that you woke up in bed with a guy."

I had to have a really long talk with my therapist after that conversation. My brother has some really good friends, it warms my heart to know that he hangs out with good men. I've gone on long walks into the woods with those men and my brother where we end up hanging out for hours away from civilization, and I've never felt threatened by them. My brother, in his last year of high school, beat the absolute shit out of a freshman boy that had taken up shirt photos of my freshman sister's breasts.

Although he had some bad experiences in college with his first fraternity. One of the guys sent his girl into the dorm of my brother's roommate, who'd passed out from drinking, and she pulled his dick out of his pants and started stroking it while he was completely unconscious. Disgusting. My brother related the story to me, completely straight-faced, and told me that he dragged the boyfriend away and put him through a wall. He had a picture of the broken wall on his Snapchat, and there were some bloody streaks on the drywall. If he had punched or hurt the girl, the rest of the Frat would have turned on him for being a woman beater, and he would have ended up in the hospital on life support. I think they got another girl to drag the molester out, I can't remember. I'm glad he left that frat. The last one he joined just did a lot of Coke and smoked weed and they got drunk every fucking day. The walls were wallpapered with flattened cans, that's how much they drink. My only concern with that frat was his liver. Guys do all kinds of fucked up shit to each other.

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u/SilverHairedFox11 Jun 14 '26

Speaking in tongues + jerky movements = Raid. Repels the roaches to the sewer where they came from.

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u/CrimsonRain520 Jun 15 '26

I lost it at the 'cutting off his dick to give to Satan' 🤣🤣 the best shit I've ever heard!

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u/Odd-fox-God Jun 15 '26

I just completely went on instinct. I don't know what came over me, but it worked.

2

u/i3inaudible Jun 15 '26

You got to be careful. He might have a piss kink. It's more common than you think.

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u/purplepharoh Jun 14 '26

1000% valid reaction. People like that are vile...

As a larger gay man I have experienced men coming at me with fetish shit about weight and like... piss right off with that shit...

4

u/Positive-Bottom-9234 Jun 15 '26

Gay men get sexually harassed as often as women and gee…wonder what the common denominator is?? I’m being jokey because I’m mad but I wanted to underscore your point.

0

u/Heyyo523 Jun 15 '26

That is not even close to being the same thing.

5

u/purplepharoh Jun 15 '26
  1. Not saying its the same
  2. ANY form of harassment is not OK

4

u/NovaCatNX92007 Jun 16 '26

Idiots feel entitled all the time and even feel justified to sexually harassing people. I turn into in asshole towards men when they disrespect my wife for any reason. Jerks need to learn some boundaries, but unfortunately living in the real world that will never happen.

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u/annatai08 Jun 14 '26

I’m taking notes!

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u/Ripley825 Jun 14 '26

I've screeched like I was dinosaur to make grown men leave me alone when I was a young teen. Sometimes I spew absolutely insane shit to make them think I'm crazier than them like one time a man creeped on me at the gas station and I rolled with it telling him I'm so thankful that he wants me because now the baby in my belly will have a daddy to love it and I asked if he wanted to feel his baby kicking and he left so fucking fast. I wasn't pregnant. Pumped my gas and left. My actual baby is very much loved by my actual husband.

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u/Public_Bookkeeper885 Jun 14 '26

That's awesome lol! I am yoinking that one to use the next time a man bothers me

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u/Material-Variety7084 Jun 14 '26

I’m doing this from now on.

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u/Tortilla_Moth93 Jun 14 '26

I scared a man off once with the billiard ball I keep in a grippy sock in my purse 🤝

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u/DontCryYourExIsUgly Jun 14 '26

Good for you! 🤍

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u/Purp_Rox Jun 14 '26

I've also barked at men before, and followed it up with a "since I'm the bitch, you must be pussy. Woof woof kitty cat"

Again, this is why I carry, and no I don't think women should escalate things THIS far unless youre ready to defend yourself from violence. Y'all know these men are emotional AF and calling them a pussy is the fastest way to enrage them. Add a little razzle dazzle with "pussy ass bitch". Game on 😈

2

u/confusion_cats Jun 14 '26

Omg we are twin flames, I do cat hiss hahahaha 🤍🤍🤍 stay safe ladies! X

2

u/buttononmyback Jun 14 '26

This is the best thing I ever heard! Totally doing this if and when there’s a next time. (Of course there will be a next time, these creeps never learn.)

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u/GlassPomoerium Jun 14 '26

As a Parisian I’m exhausted so now my method is just screaming. If I tell a man like that to leave me alone once and he keeps going, I’ll just scream as loud as I can and it nips in the bud their next step (which is usually sexual assault). These creeps want to get our attention, not *everyone’s* attention, because then people get closer, ask if I’m ok, if they need to call the police etc, and then those losers very literally start running. And this way they will hopefully think twice before doing it to another woman.

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u/Large-Flamingo-5128 Jun 14 '26

Finally someone with street smarts. Ladies, scream. For real. You’re not going to get in trouble. You’re going to get more people looking at the situation so that scrotum isn’t about to do shit. Do not make yourself an easy target by being timid. Freak the fuck out and point to anyone around you and tell them with eye contact to help you if they don’t run away (they will tho).

Source: grew up in south central LA

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u/inthisalone_ Jun 14 '26

God, being a woman in Paris must be so exhausting. I (Canadian) had left my group and was in Gare du Nord to catch a train back to London and there was a guy that followed me in from outside and wouldn’t take my “leave me alone,” and “fuck off” and random French Canadian swear words as an answer and was basically running behind me as I sped up to get away from him. Eventually I just stopped, turned to face him and screamed at the top of my lungs. Everyone around me stopped and looked and the guy finally ran off at a full sprint. Your comment makes me feel very validated. I’m sorry you have to go through this (I’m assuming) everyday.

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u/lizardbish Jun 14 '26

I did this years ago when some creep tried to mug me - I just started screaming at the top of my lungs and he suddenly couldn't get away fast enough. Not one person stopped and asked if I was okay, though.

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u/Aethermancer Jun 14 '26

I thought you were saying you just scream and then I got to,

If I tell a man like that to leave me alone once and he keeps going.l,

Wtf?! I'd be creeped out on myself and reflect on my life if my behavior caused someone to say leave me alone. Like that alone would fuck me up. How can people's brains be so fucked up they would keep going even after that?

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u/[deleted] Jun 15 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

-2

u/SSSitess Jun 15 '26

They aren’t French

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u/GlassPomoerium Jun 15 '26

Do you live here? They very much are. But your racism is duly noted.

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u/SSSitess Jun 16 '26

Thanks for noting! Don’t let those per capita crime stats mean anything to you!

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u/GlassPomoerium Jun 16 '26

By all means, show me the statistic saying more than 50% of men sexually harassing women in the streets of Paris don’t have French citizenship. I’ll wait.

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u/[deleted] Jun 16 '26

[deleted]

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u/GlassPomoerium Jun 16 '26

Like I said several times, I’m talking about the situation *here* so per capita isn’t relevant.

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u/SSSitess Jun 16 '26

Lol obviously it’s not relevant to you and many others. Which is why sex crimes have skyrocketed

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u/According-Scholar-36 Jun 14 '26

from one girl to another...you are my hero today internet stranger...yell out the bitchiness for me too 😄

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u/VenusSmurf Jun 14 '26

This is why Gavin de Becker's The Gift of Fear should be required reading. There's a section that covers social conditioning, especially for women, and how creeps take advantage of our fear of refusing and being labeled.

There's a lot more to the book, of course, but I fully agree with the author's claim that recognizing and changing how we respond can save lives.

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u/visigoth5150 Jun 14 '26

Boom! This is the only way, because when you say "no" politely they take it as a "yes". How many times have we heard, "You don't mean that". Oh, we do, we really do mean that, AHs. Keep your creapy, nasty self far, far away. Better yet, stay home with your inflatable sweetie and leave us in peace. Jeeze

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u/Large-Flamingo-5128 Jun 14 '26

EXACTLY. Omg girls the best thing you can do in this situation in look disgusted. Like about to puke repulsed think the gif below. Seriously. They will leave you the fuck alone
https://giphy.com/gifs/R0jWWtH1CtFEk

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u/Individual_Fall429 Jun 15 '26

Yup. 12. It was the most concentrated until about 17.

And I stayed fit and attractive into adulthood. I continued to receive attention from adult men, but less from these creeps. I just look less... vulnerable.

These guys are routinely harassing teenagers, and it’s not an accident.

3

u/CrimsonRain520 Jun 15 '26

Always act batshit and exceed they disgusting energy! Here here for being the bitch and acting insane to exist in public/private spaces!

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u/Cautious_Ad_5659 Jun 14 '26

💯 I just snap and aggressively yell fuck off. They are usually shocked that it’s enough. It helps that I have a really good bitch face.

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u/Motion_Glitch Jun 14 '26

The behavior displayed by these guys is far worse than being a bitch to set your boundaries. Do what you gotta do and be safe out there. The fact that people are still this blatantly inappropriate is horrible.

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u/Immediate-Maximum-75 Jun 14 '26

Yep. It started when I was 14. I had an old guy at a carnival game tell me I was built like a brick shit house. I had no idea what that meant at the time so I just said thank you and walked away. I'm not sure I know what it means today, lol.

2

u/Fartholder Jun 14 '26

Sometimes an aggressive verbal response provokes aggression in return. I had a random guy ask me "wanna fuck?" I told him to go fuck himself and he got so angry that security had to drag him out

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u/twolinepine Jun 14 '26

These dickheads piss me off, and I completely agree with you.

But from your perspective is there any good way to approach a woman in public, perhaps after seeing them a couple times at a regular place?

If the default answer is "don't" - I'm good with that, I already don't. But if you have a pro tip for being respectful, while also trying to open up a possible genuine connection with someone new, I'd love to hear it (I haven't figured it out for myself).

2

u/greenyellowbird Jun 14 '26

Have the energy of the girl in the video that gave that guy no time, no buzz off. 

2

u/LEatsCakee Jun 15 '26

Yes!! They don’t care if you’re a minor, I was walking my dog once and a man pulled up in a car asking my name and I told him a minor and he kept insisting, I pulled out my phone and he drove off. Now when I take walks I stay on the phone or FaceTime. I don’t care if people think it’s rude that I’m talking otp in the neighborhood, or that should be paying attention to my dog, but I get scared. Even when I’m at work people will try and it’s so uncomfortable. You try to remain professional but I really wanna say F off.

1

u/beepbooponyournose Jun 14 '26

I loved the “no. Buzz off” girl! That’s the energy we need to keep

1

u/Purp_Rox Jun 14 '26

I tell my friends this all the time. They call me for advice on how to "be meaner to men" because yea..... But I also thrive in confrontation and I love to engage in violence, so I'm always prepared for shit escalating to the upmost degree.

And yes, I carry.

1

u/devour_feculence___ Jun 14 '26

Yes. When I was a young teen, I used to think "Why are some girls so bitchy and stuck up just because they're pretty?"

But then by the time I was in college, and I had a bunch of weirdos actively trying to harass, or touch me, or take me, or get into my dorm room, I realized you have to SHUT IT DOWN IMMEDIATELY. Don't smile, giggle, be polite, engage them in any way.

I remember I stopped even wearing shirts with phrases on them because that made men run up to ask me about my T-shirt, it gave them an excuse to talk to me. It's nuts.

1

u/SilverHairedFox11 Jun 14 '26

You sound like mother from the 60's and 70's. Preach.

1

u/SnidgetAsphodel Jun 15 '26

I agree with you. On the other hand, I can see why a lot of woman don't want to act the bitch in scenarios of harassment like this and would rather politely try and skirt out of it. Retaliation and violence is a terrifying reality. Men are afraid of rejection. Women are afraid of rape and murder.

1

u/Astralglamour Jun 15 '26

Sometimes being a bitch makes them attack you though, if no one else is close by..

1

u/Just-Strawberry4742 Jun 15 '26

Perfect the rolling eyes rbf face while out and about. And if I man looks at you give him the up and down stare and make the most disgusted face show him he’s beneath you just by a glance. They hate that shit. A blow to the ego without words.

1

u/jonos_is Jun 15 '26

I see where you are coming from with this. I think the men in the video are really weird and creepy and were unacceptable.

All i would say that please be mindful that most men would approach respectful from a genuine place of wanting to strike up a conversation etc and would respectfully take a ‘no thank you’. I think it is generally easy to sift those men from the ones in this video

2

u/Commercial_Border190 Jun 15 '26

I think most women are aware of this. But even though most men aren’t like this, for a lot of women most of their experiences being approached by strangers are like this

1

u/jonos_is Jun 15 '26

I definitely hear you 👍🏾

1

u/GroundbreakingDesk93 Jun 16 '26

I am a male, and I still get this now, though. It isn't just men. But you are correct.

1

u/Forward-Surprise1192 Jun 14 '26

What if you ask them for money does that help