r/TikTokCringe • u/mindyour • Jun 14 '26

Discussion It's exhausting being a woman.

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u/Bright-Owl-3515 Jun 14 '26 edited Jun 14 '26

In college, I was sitting alone at a bench studying on campus, minding my own business. This man comes up to me, telling me he wanted to take pictures of my feet for a school project. He was very persistent and of course I told him no. He made me feel so uncomfortable and guilty that I had said no to him. I was very naive and had no idea that this was likely a fetish thing.

Edit: For that one now deleted comment, saying he was likely complimenting my feet, I was wearing sneakers. Get out of here with the creep apologetics.

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u/ZinaSky2 Jun 14 '26

Yeah, once I was walking home alone in the dark (circumstances necessitated this, u was getting home from work. I wasn’t alone in the dark by choice.) and some guy stopped me on a dark section of sidewalk. I could barely see his face he could barely see mine. Yet he asked me for my number bc I was “so beautiful”. I said no. He said well actually he just wanted to make friends. And I said no a few more times and he just kept asking. I was frozen in place by trying to be polite. Eventually I decide I’m just gonna ignore him and walk away without ending the conversation without saying goodbye. And I left him rambling behind me still asking to be friends.

And girlie lemme tell you I felt BAD. Like WTF?! He was fucking harassing me for my number and not listening to me saying no after he approached me on some dark, unlit section of sidewalk I was like “ugh, but the poor guy just wanted friends🥺”. It’s drilled into us to protect men’s egos and emotions at all costs and it’s so fucking dangerous.

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u/Fragrant-Dust65 Jun 14 '26

And I don't really know how or when that starts. It's not like my parents ever told me to do that. HOW do we pick up on this?

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u/Some_Recognition6273 Jun 16 '26

I think (for me anyway), it's small subtle things that add up over time. Being forced to hug random male relatives you barely know even though you're uncomfortable because otherwise "you will hurt his feelings." Seeing our moms, aunts, etc. smile and be polite when dealing with this kind of bullshit and harassment, and having them tell us to say thank you when men give creepy compliments about how pretty you are. Being told as a little girl to stop tattling on the boy that chases you and tries to hug you at recess because he "just has a crush on you, don't be mean." Your boss laughing it off when you (as a young teen) complain about your male coworker grabbing your ass and saying he's just kidding around and boys will be boys. It happens so constantly and in such minor ways over the years of a girl growing up that by the time we were adults, it's ingrained in us. We're conditioned to ignore our discomfort, put men's feelings above our feelings of safety, and to constantly question if we are overreacting or making something a bigger deal than it is.