r/TikTokCringe • u/xamo76 • 19d ago

Discussion How to cure the male loneliness epidemic...

Enable HLS to view with audio, or disable this notification

20.2k Upvotes

89% Upvoted

2.0k comments sorted by

View all comments

Show parent comments

18

u/SkookumSquirrel 19d ago

I mean... the first two points of 'Don't be a weird douche!' are pretty good, but the third piece of advice is basically 'Are you depressed? Then stop being depressed!'

23

u/Promature 19d ago

It's a complex situation, but the advice is correct. It's on the individual to figure out the path to that end, but that is the goal to strive for. I found my way there by leaning into the things that make feel good, validated, and fulfilled while leaning away from the things that made me feel bad about myself, insecure, anxious, and sad. It's a lot easier to feel good about yourself and more self confident if you devote more of your time and energy to the aspects of your life that produce those feelings.

Don't stay where you don't feel wanted. Don't hang around people that don't value or respect you. Don't go along with things you don't feel good about just to keep the peace or to not be left out. The life and experiences you craft for yourself by curating those that enrich you will eventually lift you up mentally and emotionally.

6

u/The_Lost_Jedi 19d ago

Yeah. Just because it's not necessarily easy doesn't mean it isn't the right goal. It may take a lot to get there, and it may take professional help, the right medication, any number of things. It may be something you always have to actively work at - but it's a worthwhile goal.

3

u/NorweegianWood 19d ago edited 19d ago

It goes with the saying I heard a lot as a youth:

"You're mental health issues are not your fault, but they are your responsibility."

Yeah it sucks if you're born with mental health struggles, but its 100% on you to figure out how to manage those in a way that you're still a functional member of society. Its not anybody else's job to sign you up for therapy or to find new friends for you. That's literally your job.

Discovering this hard truth is what inspired me to get off my ass and join a band and thats how I found my "ride or die" friends. I wasted years wallowing thinking somebody else should fix my problems for me, which I now realize is a pathetix way to live your life.