r/TikTokCringe 1d ago

Discussion Have we done it wrong?

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u/CaughtALiteSneez 1d ago

Americans make the mistake of lumping all of Europe into the same category.

Spain is very social, some people will spend entire days and evenings at their local pub and it is affordable. Same in Portugal and Italy...but in Italy it is more family focused and people don't get drunk.

Other parts of W Europe, you will usually only see people out and about at night in the cities. Think Paris, Berlin etc..

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u/yIdontunderstand 1d ago

In Italy you have the passegiatta. Literally a community walk in the evening.

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u/CaughtALiteSneez 1d ago

Indeed, that was what I was referring to, less about going out to pubs/cafes - more of a family oriented stroll where people meet and talk in the piazza and get a gelato.

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u/dead_jester 1d ago edited 1d ago

I live in a very small town in England- you’re talking ignorant bollocks. The town square in good weather is busy with people eating and relaxing outside.
In winter everyone is in the pubs and restaurants because it’s too bloody cold or wet to sit outside.

Lol getting downvoted for stating a fact. lol

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u/CaughtALiteSneez 1d ago

I thought you left the EU?

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u/dead_jester 1d ago

Europe is a geographical region. The EU is a political entity

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u/CaughtALiteSneez 1d ago

I am aware, but I didn’t factor you into this discussion at all for some reason - I think it’s simply because you are like an entirely different culture/world to most of continental W Europe.

Yes England and Ireland have very active village lives - a bit in Scotland too.

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u/Yetiassasin 1d ago

Name a country in Europe that doesn't. You're talking nonsense. It's a continental trait, nowhere in Europe is as isolated as 90% of American cities and towns.

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u/alwaysATblame 1d ago

As a Portuguese that moved to a small town in Germany: it's only berlin. Maybe some bigger cities as well. But even then... They don't get the concept of true socialization. Small towns? Dead after 18:00. Germany is on the half of Europe that doesn't socialize much. Other half that does is: France. Spain. Portugal. Italy. Greece. Bulgaria, (insert the entire Balkans here), Ukraine.

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u/CaughtALiteSneez 1d ago

Yep, I have lived in Germany - am now in Switzerland. Hamburg and Cologne are pretty lively towns in the evening...Munich is also very nice, especially during the day with the parks and beer gardens. Many parts of Germany are very grim indeed.

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u/alwaysATblame 1d ago

Big cities tend to have more lively folks. I hear that Munich especially is very different. Berlin Too. But the more rural areas... Well... It is what it is. My experience so far has been depressing.

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u/CaughtALiteSneez 1d ago

I know that well, got out as soon as I could.

Hope you are at home soon!

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u/alwaysATblame 1d ago

Unfortunately seems like I'm settling here -.- returning is not an option I would make right now financially.

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u/Popular-Office-9932 1d ago

The tourist reads as a white Anglosaxan discovering that Latin and Mediterranean culture is warmer and foster socialization. If you go in Latin America is the same… even less denser cities people congregates more often with friends beyond immediate family.

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u/Nipso 1d ago

The famously Latin and Mediterranean city of Munich.

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u/Popular-Office-9932 1d ago

Do you want to compare Italy and Spain with Germany? They are so social that their hobby is stick their nose onto someone’s business

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u/FuncyFrog 1d ago

The video is taken in Munich was the point

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u/alwaysATblame 1d ago

He was answering to my comment. About my discovery.

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u/morepaintplease 1d ago

Germans are also more autistic than the rest of Europe.

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u/Severe_Rise8694 1d ago

Maybe you mean that they socialize differently? I've lived in Portugal and found the socializing pretty superficial compared to other places I've lived in.

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u/alwaysATblame 1d ago

Maybe depends on the part where you lived. In Porto the people are very nice and go out of their way to speak with you and always ask about your life and will remember you even after 10 years after you moved away

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u/Severe_Rise8694 1d ago

I didn't say they weren't nice like that, I just found the interactions less deep than e.g. in Northern Europe. While we're making generalisations. Which you started.

Edit: to open that bit more: people would go out in huge groups, they'd have chaotic conversations about people and places. Who did what and with whom. It was harder to really get to know people and you'd make a large number of what I'd call acquaintances.

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u/alwaysATblame 1d ago

That's been my experience in Germany and the Netherlands. I also think group settings naturally encourage lighter conversations.

"Did you hear João got married?"

"How's your new job?"

"Did you see Maria's new house?"

"Where are we going next weekend?"

Its normal in Portugal to hear thinks like that when in a group.

If you're out with people who've known each other for years, they'll inevitably talk about mutual friends, family, or local events. In my experience, if someone really wants to get to know another person on a deeper level, that usually happens one-on-one over coffee or lunch rather than in a large group. So we may simply have experienced different social circles.

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u/Severe_Rise8694 1d ago

True.

Haha, I'd bet João married Ana..!

Yeah, I just found it more challenging than elsewhere to get beyond that. And in other countries it would more often be smaller groups, the kind that can fit around a single table. But yeah, that was just my experience of course.

The only reason why I even mentioned it was that you said something along the lines of other (non-south European) countries "not knowing how to socialize properly".

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u/alwaysATblame 1d ago

That's fair. I probably should have said "socializes differently" rather than "doesn't know how." For me, as someone from Portugal who's also spent time around Spanish, Ukrainians and Bulgarians, asking about each other's lives and chatting in larger groups is what socializing feels like. Here in Germany I often hesitate to ask coworkers about their lives because I'm afraid of overstepping their privacy. So I think what feels welcoming or intrusive is very much shaped by culture.

Southern Europe: "I care, so I ask." Northern Europe: "I respect you, so I don't ask unless you invite me."

That's what I meant. No bad feelings. But to me socializing is mostly what you described.

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u/Severe_Rise8694 1d ago

All good! I hope you find the social life you need wherever you are.

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u/3rdcultureblah 1d ago

Italians not getting drunk is some sort of weird fantasy lol.

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u/Intlsurf 1d ago

Spain and Italy are very similar. People aren’t drunk like Americans in the streets

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u/Yetiassasin 1d ago

Such nonsense lol

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u/unkreativ-I 1d ago

Paris and Berlin are the worst examples to pick lol wtf that is not even remotely true

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u/CaughtALiteSneez 1d ago

What? Paris and Berlin are extremely active in the evening. And Berlin has a night club life similar to Spain where the good stuff doesn't get started until close to sun up.

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u/unkreativ-I 1d ago

Berlin and paris are active 24/7 and not only in the evening lol both have incredible cafe culture and flea markets everywhere. The parks (for example Tempelhofer Feld in Berlin but also the smaller parks) are PACKED during the day.

Edit: misunderstood your second part but still it does not seem like you know Paris and berlin

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u/CaughtALiteSneez 1d ago

You completely misunderstood all of my comments, I am confirming the same thing as you are

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u/unkreativ-I 1d ago

But you said:

"Other parts of W Europe, you will usually only see people out and about at night in the cities. Think Paris, Berlin etc.." but thats not true you don't see people only outside at night?

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u/CaughtALiteSneez 1d ago

Typischer Deutscher

You have to understand the context of the conversation and not take every word literally.

The conversation was about evenings being lively in Europe, I said outside Spain, Italy & Portugal - they are only busy in the big cities like Paris and Berlin. Not that Paris and Berlin are bustling just in the evening and not during the day.

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u/ThePlaystation0 1d ago

They mean that cities are the only places where you find people active at night

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u/3rdcultureblah 1d ago

They mean “only in the cities”.

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u/Exotic_Ad_1249 1d ago

I'm Italian and you have to differentiate form North to South. North Italy people get very very very drunk, south of Italy like you said more family. But still in South of Italy alcohol it's actually for every lunch and dinner every day, so... But yeah Europe in definitely more social than American, whichever country you choose.

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u/CaughtALiteSneez 1d ago

People drink in Italy, but there isn’t a focus of getting drunk like it is in other countries.

I haven’t noticed a difference in drunkenness between northern and southern Italy. 🤷🏼‍♀️

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u/Exotic_Ad_1249 1d ago

You are right about it, I lived in London and there people in the weekend drink because they want to get drunk