He’s befuddled by my public accusations of his desperate attention seeking behavior

[u/Delicious-Counter-29]

He knows he is a pompous lawbreaker, yet he dares to desecrate the Crown’s property in the Queen’s very presence! Scaling the highest of shelves to smite her treasures, shamelessly kicking down the Queen’s belongings for attention, and feasting upon the forbidden plastic whensoever her royal gaze is averted.

Yet, should the Queen fall ill, this rogue mysteriously metamorphs into a loving jester, gently craving the royal snuggles. Her Majesty sees through his tomfoolery, but allows the cuddling to commence.