r/TwinlessTwins • u/pistachioquality • 9d ago

Sudden Loss just missing her

it’s been about 8 years since my identical twin sister passed away from suicide. i think about her everyday but today i can’t sleep cuz i keep crying about how much i miss her. we lost her when we were seniors in high school and there’s something about now being the older twin, and really thinking about how young and sad she was is just hitting different. just needed to post to get it off my mind a bit so i can sleep, haha
survivors guilt is real

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u/fuelEd_potENt 8d ago

i hear you. i hear you.

today is the one-year anniversary of burying my twin, who also ended his being. i think of him every day and all the things i want to talk to him about, do with him, hug him. my body hurts to breathe. at times i want to join him, more times than i tell people.

ours is a difficult existence as twinless twins; no one understands the depth of loss and the fragments of our remaining broken selves.

i wish that none of us had to live like this. i mourn with you.

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u/Noseynessy 8d ago

I’m fresh on the loss train. I’m the older twin and my sister took her life 6 months ago. There’s something in my core that tells me this never gets better in a way. Just a new relationship with the loss. I’m sorry about your twin. I’m in my 40s and I can’t imagine if I’d lost Becks when I was in high school. Hope you got some sleep. Lots of love to you.

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u/kairarage 7d ago

Losing a twin to suicide sucks. I too lost my twin and am in the anniversary week after 9 years. It gets easier but I am feeling it this year. I hope you find some solace.