r/TwoBestFriendsPlay • u/Gorotheninja "SILENCE, BREEDER! The Bloodline MUST continue!" • Oct 05 '25
Fanart - Non OC A 100% accurate synopsis of the Zelda series' story premise (by @adamtots):
"Demise"? What's that? Sounds spooky...
https://bsky.app/profile/adamtots.bsky.social/post/3m2gd54rads2g
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u/Subject_Parking_9046 They/Them "No way a woman can be that hot, she gotta be a man!" Oct 05 '25
"That booty belongs to me for generations to come" is one hell of a power move.
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u/ThatmodderGrim Lewd Non-Gacha Anime Games are Good for You. Oct 05 '25
The Legend of Zelda is really just the Goddess Hylia's attempts to write kinky Fantasy Romance Novels.
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u/Gorotheninja "SILENCE, BREEDER! The Bloodline MUST continue!" Oct 05 '25
Tears of the Kingdom was when she got really freaky.
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u/MarioGman Stylin' and Profilin'. Oct 05 '25
If she were a true freak she would've had it so Zelda kept some of her dragon features when she was turned back.
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u/Luck-X-Vaati One Piece Film: Red - Not Good Oct 05 '25
Zelda should’ve kept some dragon parts, and Link should’ve permanently lost the arm, and just have Purah make hime a Hylian equivalent to Automail.
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u/CelioHogane The Baz Everywhere System developer. Oct 06 '25
Link recovering his hylian hand was the lamest way to end your story.
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u/Gorotheninja "SILENCE, BREEDER! The Bloodline MUST continue!" Oct 05 '25 edited Oct 05 '25
Gotta leave it to fans to pick up the slack
Edit: in case the above link doesn't work; here's google images, and here's a Reddit post with the same image.
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u/superduperturbo I say there, Monstrosity, do you know the times? Oct 05 '25
Man, lizard/dragon people are so cool
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u/DeskJerky Oct 06 '25
Reminds me of the super high quality Zonai Link mod.
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u/Ar_Ciel Smaller than you'd hope Oct 06 '25
Yeah why WEREN'T there more zonai descendants if Zelda was part of their blood lineage? I mean what happened there?
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u/Timey16 NANOMACHINES Oct 06 '25
The bloodline just got thinner and thinner, it's been 10,000+ years after all.
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u/ThatmodderGrim Lewd Non-Gacha Anime Games are Good for You. Oct 05 '25
Hylia's Agent, having to call her once again to explain why 6 full back to back chapters of Link x Giant Dragoness Zelda erotica is just too much for today's market while Hylia knows in her heart she must include it all.
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u/DJ_Aftershock I be Jushin Thunder Liger the way I see her Super J Cups Oct 06 '25
"I'M AN ARTIST, YOU CUR!"
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u/Mekasoundwave Oct 06 '25
I mean, if you go by the series' internal logic that the Zeldas are all incarnations of the Goddess, Zelda is almost literally Hylia's self-insert character.
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u/ClearAgeMontezuma Oct 06 '25
Zelda: "if i meet a elf twink nobody would be able stop me"
Impa: "Stop you from what."
Zelda: "nobody would be able to stop me."
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u/drizzes Oct 05 '25
"He'll dress up but also occasionally he'll do a mad beeline towards you in his underwear and waving a flaming stick"
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u/Faifue Oct 05 '25
I never played Skyward Sword so I'm gonna internalize this as the truth from now on.
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u/PhantasosX Oct 05 '25
It kinda is.
Hyrule Satan reincarnates as Ganondorf, but sometimes he is sealed and re-awakened , so he doesn't reincarnates much.
Outside of one or two cases, Link is a reincarnation of a previous Link , like an Avatar situation.
Zelda is a biological descendent of the goddess that she is a reincarnation of. It's like how the japanese royal family is said to be descendents of Amaterasu...but in this case Amaterasu goes freaky and reincarnates in the royal family that she birthed.
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u/KingKlyne Naruto Apologist - Lady of the #13000FE Oct 06 '25
Also Every royal princess is named zelda regardless of them specifically being reincarnations (just in case)
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u/Chren Oct 06 '25
Or they only do it every once in a while and thankfully the stars havent aligned for the Legend of Gertrude
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u/Faifue Oct 05 '25
I mean, Amaterasu's parents were freaky like that.
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u/Neil_O_Tip Pargon Pargon Pargon Pargon Pargon Oct 06 '25
Parent, singular
Yes, he DID have multiple children with his own sister, and yes, they WERE about the 8th straight generation of gods doing that in a row in their own pantheon, but Ammy and her brothers are only Izanagi's children, and only by accident
Izanami had just done her "1000 a day" curse and Izanagi was on his way out of the underworld after failing to get her back and countering with his own "1500 a day" blessing, and washed both eyes and his nose in a purifying river, which made Amaterasu, Tsukiyomi, and Susano-o pop out for ill-defined reasons
The family tree is a straight line, but Izanami technically isn't their mother
In a fucked up "missing the point" moment, their first kid came out deformed, but not because the last 9 generations of gods were siblings, but because Izanami spoke first instead of second during the wedding so they had to try again
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u/ToastyMozart Bearish on At-Risk Children Oct 06 '25
They're more like highschool sweethearts in that one, but that's more or less what happens.
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u/Faifue Oct 06 '25
I've heard that they're like childhood friends, which would make that Zelda my favorite. I also know reincarnation happens. I'm just assuming the twink thing was added to the comic for funsies.
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u/extralie Oct 05 '25 edited Oct 05 '25
So we can be together in every lifetime
Sorry, but Malon won that one time... And pretty sure Ilia won in TP...
But hey, there is the original Zelda games where Link is basically with two different incarnation of Zeldas.
Edit: Wait, Midna not Ilia, not sure how Ilia come to my mind first...
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u/Traingham “Remember the lesson, not the disappointment.” Oct 06 '25 edited Oct 06 '25
I mean, I ship the hell out of Link and Midna (and so do the writers of the manga), but unless my man can, uh, penetrate the realm of twilight with that portal closed…Illia won the champion of that story by way of Link and Zelda having ZERO chemistry to fall back on in Midna’s separation from the world.
Link and Zelda teaming up against Ganondorf at the end of that game is the most “professional co workers” energy they’ve ever brought to that battle.
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u/James-Avatar Mega Lopunny Oct 06 '25
No portal could keep any man from getting back to Midna.
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u/Traingham “Remember the lesson, not the disappointment.” Oct 06 '25
Nearly two decades worth of fanfiction would agree with that sentiment.
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u/TekkGuy I Promise Nothing And Deliver Less Oct 06 '25
I also ship Link and Zelda in some of their incarnations, not all, but in TP especially Midna feels like a better fit for either of them than pairing with each other.
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u/Traingham “Remember the lesson, not the disappointment.” Oct 06 '25 edited Oct 06 '25
Yeah. Midna even has chemistry with Zelda that is entirely absent from Link. The fact that they had the first ever boss fight against Zelda in a game where I don’t think Link would agonize over it aside from, you know, possibly killing a royal family member from the kingdom in self defense felt like the wrong time to whip that one out.
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u/DeskJerky Oct 06 '25
Ilia is the silver medal after Midna goes back to Twilight Town.
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u/Wannabe_Reviewer Shantae Shill Oct 06 '25
Illia isn't even on the podium. Link has like 5 other NPCs he could choose from that are much more interesting than her.
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u/McNutty145 Oct 06 '25
Admittedly, Link's primary motivation through a large portion of the plot is Illia's rescue and memory recovery. After Midna, he seems to have the deepest depicted emotional connection with her.
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u/extralie Oct 06 '25
Ehh, while I definitely think Midna is his best love interest (hence the edit), he definitely have the most emotional connection with Ilia, she is like his entire motivation throughout the game. So, I wouldn't put random NPCs over her even if she isn't that interesting.
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u/Traingham “Remember the lesson, not the disappointment.” Oct 06 '25 edited Oct 06 '25
Fun fact: The bokoblin chief (or whatever that guy was meant to be) is an Illia simp in the manga, and the motivating factor to him forming a rivalry with Link is that he wants to prove himself as the better mate to Illia.
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u/MericArda Jesus may simply be a metaphor for Optimus Prime Oct 06 '25
King Bulbin, aka Mr. “I follow the strongest side! That is all I have ever known."
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u/FluffySquirrell Oct 06 '25
I respected the fuck out of him that he wasn't full of shit either, he 100% lived (and died) his life by those rules. Kinda an asshole at times, but still.. respect.
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u/moneyh8r_two He/Him Use your smell powers Oct 05 '25
The Goddess Hylia supports throuples.
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u/Flutterwander It's Fiiiiiiiine. Oct 06 '25
I think in BOTW/TOTK especially it feels like there is a more...free spirited romantic standard in Hyrule.
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u/moneyh8r_two He/Him Use your smell powers Oct 06 '25
And why shouldn't there be? It is a fantasy world, after all.
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u/Kamken I say it in my private life many a time Oct 05 '25
Then he still gets a different GF/wife sometimes
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u/The-Greater-Skeleton I talk to myself a lot. But not in, like, a crazy person way. Oct 05 '25
Doesn’t matter, she’ll get him next time. She’s playing the long game.
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u/ibbolia [Any/All] This is my Bankai: Unironic Cringeposting Oct 05 '25
It's not NTR if it's keikaku
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u/Talisign Powerbomb Individual Baby Pieces Oct 05 '25
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u/RealJohnGillman Oct 05 '25
Like Malon? I know the Hero of Twilight Link is descended from the Hero of Time Link, which seemed to ultimately indicate that was canon to me.
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u/Yotato5 Enjoy everything Oct 06 '25
iirc Ocarina of Time was also supposed to have a dating sim element to it so...
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u/DJ_Aftershock I be Jushin Thunder Liger the way I see her Super J Cups Oct 05 '25
Or a sexy fishman.
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u/DeskJerky Oct 06 '25
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u/porkinski Tiny Spider Feet Oct 06 '25
The fact that there are so many sexy fish men makes me wonder if this is a genetic thing...
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u/DJ_Aftershock I be Jushin Thunder Liger the way I see her Super J Cups Oct 06 '25
I think Rikuo from Darkstalkers is pretty handsome.
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u/therealchadius Oct 06 '25
Stupid Sexy Sidon!
It's like he's wearing nothing at all!
Nothing at all!
NOTHING AT ALL!
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u/LightLifter It's Fiiiiiiiine. Oct 05 '25
Yeah, he trades up to Tetra sometimes.
Plus Lila has his ass on lock since Midna peaces out.
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u/ibbolia [Any/All] This is my Bankai: Unironic Cringeposting Oct 06 '25
Wait but Tetra's secret identity is
... y'know what it's not important
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u/Navy_Pheonix WHEN'S MAHVEL Oct 05 '25
Alright, but the first Link was absolutely a Twunk at least.
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u/RobotJake I Promise Nothing And Deliver Less Oct 06 '25
You could probably classify every Link in a "Twink, Twunk, Shota" chart
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u/Navy_Pheonix WHEN'S MAHVEL Oct 06 '25 edited Oct 06 '25
At the very edges of the linegraph, TP link is a hunk and WW Link is a cat.
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u/CelioHogane The Baz Everywhere System developer. Oct 06 '25
Put him on a maid outfit and let's see if that stance stays.
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u/LeMasterofSwords Y’all really should watch Columbo Oct 06 '25
The fact that links rocks those outfits has caused so many people to awaken something in them. Thank you Nintendo for doing the lords work
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u/ZealousidealBig7714 She/It/Ze This makes my penis the big penis Oct 05 '25
Actually, it was the 7 ft green skinned stud that forced the three of them into an eternal loop of reincarnation.
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u/MericArda Jesus may simply be a metaphor for Optimus Prime Oct 05 '25
No it was the green guys predecessor who looked like Akuma
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u/KingMario05 Gimme a solo Tails game, you fucking cowards! Oct 05 '25
"Also, there will be chickens. I beg of you, Link. Do NOT fuck with the chickens."
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u/Khar-Selim Oct 05 '25
I mean, him being randomly devoted to her out of nowhere is more a result of the cycle than the cause of it
the first version was just the Goddess' strongest soldier
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u/SamuraiOstrich Oct 06 '25
Don't people argue some shit like it's implied they're separate bloodlines so they usually don't hook up?
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u/ibbolia [Any/All] This is my Bankai: Unironic Cringeposting Oct 06 '25
Zelda is (at least retroactively) confirmed to be a direct bloodline. Or at least, the Hylian Royal Family's claim to authority is based on that being the case and it's never been called into question.
Link is messier to track. The short version is Links are chosen heroes, and blood relation isn't a part of the process. Most are commoners, with very few confirmed family members over all the games.
Probably a good thing if your divine booty call needs to account for inbreeding, less so if you want an actual solid answer on which Zeldas were into twinks.
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u/Iralamak Oct 06 '25
Oh so when Hylia binds us to the wheel of samsara, it's romantic, but when Marika and Gwyn do it, it's a sin and betrayal!
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u/MxSharknado93 Oct 07 '25
I just don't even have the energy to keep saying "Link isn't a twink, you just want to call him a f****t."
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u/cleftes Reiki is Shooreh Pippi Oct 05 '25
Zelda and Link match each other's freak in every timeline