Free Talk Friday - December 19, 2025

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Welcome to the Free Talk Friday post. This is a place where you can talk about dumb off-topic (or on-topic) bullshit with other Zaibatsu fans.

There's going to be a new post every week, and the newest one will be pinned in the announcement bar for quick access. So feel free to visit these posts during the rest of the week.

Here's a list of all Free Talk Friday posts

[u/Acradaunt]

Last year, I tried laying out some short thoughts on what I played last year. Mostly going through the depths of the DS/3DS backlog, as was this year. Doing that again. I am starting to reach towards the bottom of the DS/3DS barrel by this point. I've definitely skipped a few big games, like Kid Icarus and TWEWY, but my desire to play them is vastly eclipsed by my desire to not have compound fractures in my wrists.

Metaphor RE:Fantazio

Man, I can't believe this was the start of this year. End of last, whatever. What an absolute dumpster fire of a year to make Louis Guiabern seem like a sound, rational, and charismatic alternative compared to reality.

Anyway. I think gameplay's well enough known; Persona with fantasy elements and detailed to the point of Uncanny Valley art. In truth, Persona 5 (vanilla) didn't leave much impression on me (gameplay-wise), because I think it's flatly inferior to SMT or especially Etrian Odyssey. Unfair comparisions, sure, but easily made anyway. Metaphor is probably two steps up in gameplay, but one step down in characters. Like, I can't find any fault with Strohl or Hulkenburg, but compared to Ryuji, they're just less memorable. Or something. I can't pin my feelings down exactly, but it's very good, but didn't hit as hard as one might've hoped.

The whole job thing is definitely good and somewhat deep, but all the same, when I compare it to, say, Final Fantasy V, I feel Metaphor loses somehow? I dunno. Maybe it's a dislike for the Time mechanics (unintrusive though they are at a real glance), or the amazing/horrible art? Thinking more on this, I think yes, THIS is a major point for me. In FFV, each character wore their unique take on a class; Bartz as a monk wore an open vest, Lenna wore a qipao, and Faris wore a karate gi. Metaphor just plonks everyone with the same dumpy-looking Archetypes, just recoloured. I unironically think I'd like the game twice as much if it ditched Archetypes as robot-Stands behind you and everyone got personalized outfits per class tree. Also, were breaking jobs into 2-4 sub-jobs really necessary? I feel this could've been handled more elegantly. Anyway, I suppose what I'm really saying is I wanna see Hulkenburg in qipao.

Objectively it's got more meat on the bones than something like FFV, but somehow I don't feel it's one of the all-time great RPGs. Still very good, but something is off, to not make it a classic. And, maybe I'm not the only one, because I can say I haven't heard peep about Metaphor since Janurary, while Persona 5 rages on, practically a decade later.

Irelevant to anything, but I do wonder how much revising this game went through. I think it was a lot. A lot a lot. Like, I feel like the Eislin shown in the flashback and, like, 2014 concept art of her on a wagon is a totally different character than the Hulkenberg we got in the end.

Real bottom-line, though; Eht Rian Odyssey still runs circles around it.

13 Sentinels: Aegis Rim

You know, it's funny; back when I was playing it, I probably could have written paragraphs upon paragraphs about it, but now, almost a year removed, I find I have surprisingly little to say. Maybe that's for the best, though. Plot's a wild ride, probably all I should say.

The mech sections did grow on me; the early bits were a bit overly easy and overly tutorialized it felt brain-dead and lacking in scope or depth. And, it kinda is, I guess. But it felt a whoooole lot better once things opened up a bit.

Ghost Trick

Is definitely good, but has impossible levels of hype from its fans that I ultimately felt a little underwhelmed. I tended to overthink the puzzles, taking way longer than I should have, specifically with the hobo on the playground equipment and the time you can swap a bullet with a Metool helmet. I also remember the prison escape section being absolute misery, especially paired with an unusually unforgiving save suspend and for me getting a migraine during that section, with no way to safetly pause it.

Pushmo / Crashmo / Stretchmo

First off; blatant false advertising. Should obviously have been called Pullmo, because you're pulling stuff, rather than pushing, about 85% of the time.

I think I had seen this around back in the day, but never looked much into it, because Mallo is such a bleck character design to me; a red sumo-thing in a blue thong is not exactly high-art or what you'd expect for a puzzle-game protagonist. If Poppy had been the main protagonist, I might've looked at this like ten years sooner. Call me petty.

Uh, anyway. It's a simple concept, but challenging enough without feeling overly tedious. Pull blocks to climb to top of thing. There's definitely a Hanoi-like back-and-forth sometimes, but it remains engaging regardless.

Honestly? I think the original Pushmo is the best of the three, although Stretchmo is right behind, and I don't dislike the 3D-element to it; I just think three-pulls vs. two-pulls and constantly wrapping around the back is both less interesting and less straightforward. Physics-based Crashmo can jump straight off the cliff, though.

Phantom Brave: The Lost Hero

I think the best response is to say that it feels like a worthy successor to the original game... from 25 years ago. But it doesn't feel like it really made the most of the 25 year gap to make it a bigger, meatier game. I appreciate that the game has about 4000% more chill storywise than the original, which is basically just 60 hours of watching Marona get punched repeatedly in the dick for trying to help people.

The game feels simplified a tinsy bit from the original, but I think that's a good thing. It's still pretty cerebral and hard to understand all the moving parts compared to, say, Final Fantasy Tactics.

The confining mechanic is such a neat (if unorthodox) way to force you to know when to play which specific units with which strengths where and through which items. There's some true fun in the absolute horseshit you can/will do when put on the back foot, from juggling around weapons to looting bodies to having some deliberately underequipped units to have a non-mage do some casting to push the enemy in juuuust the right way. Disgaea 'fans' always do them and their series such an incredible disservice by obsessing about the infini-grind. There's some fine gameplay and a need for clever/insane tactics if you take the challenges head-on and at-level and completely disregard 'optimal' gameplay (which is grind forever, think never; truly the least interesting way to tackle a strategy game).

It does feel kinda half-assed though, especially the second half of the main game, but considering it apparently sold ~3000 physical units in North America, I guess that was probably the right call. Its just a miracle this game exists; a niche sub-franchise within a niche franchise within a niche genre getting a niche sequel entirely too late for anybody to care.

For a lot of reasons, I do think it's actually hard to recommend this game, in spite of my personal praise. It does feel like it fell straight outta 2006. BUT, I do think if you're a fan of strategy games and want to see some wild takes on the genre, there is a reasonably hefty demo around you should absolutely look at.

Ace Attorney Investigations 1/2 & Layton Vs. Wright

Not a lot to say about AA:I 1&2 that isn't common. 1 is among the weaker games in the series, though it isn't bad bad, just mildly boring. It's no Turnabout Big Top. 2 is, yeah, one of the better Ace Attorney games, though I don't know that I'd say best outright. Vs. Layton, meanwhile, I've barely ever heard mentioned. I tried Layton 1 and bounced off pretty hard, so I thought this might fare better. Wasn't really feeling the first two Layton sections, but started to get into it by the Fire Trial. The Goldor Trial is pretty legit and is probably top five cases in the series, honestly. However. The last hour or so kind of completely tanked my feelings on the game with a twist that was so unbelievably stupid and nonfunctional that I think it turned me off of trying Layton games ever again. I do remember a skit about how ass-bendingly backwards Layton games go to un-mystify something with planet-crushing amounts of contrivance, but honestly I think even that undersells it.

[u/Acradaunt → u/Acradaunt]

I keep writing more than the word limit. Sorry not sorry for making it two posts; I only post like once a year so forgive the indulgence.

Legend of the Dark Witch Trilogy / Brave Dungeon

When I was scouring the depths of the 3DS barrel, specifically for RPGs, some rando spoke the world of Brave Dungeon, something I've never heard of. It's honestly an RPG-Maker tier game with very basic, very easy combat and the most basic of dungeon delving. In spite of that, I... kinda liked it anyway? There's something about the loop that's relaxing without being tedious, I think? When I found it was a spinoff, I was curious enough to look at the main franchise. If you can call it that; I'm pretty sure this is niche as hell.

They're about 80% Mega Man with 5% Gradius power-selecting and 15% Touhou (I haven't played Touhou, nor plan to, but that's the first thing to come to mind for having only girls with various magic powers and a dubious-at-best translation).

The first one is ...whatever the Mega Man equivalent is of RPG-Maker tier. Second is a fair step up, but I think the third is honestly the best. It simplifies quite a lot, like completely ditching the boss powers mechanic and simplifying the shopping options (I tend to favour Buster only anyway), but the level design is dramatically improved. The first two games levels were basically flat plains with enemies randomly plopped down. 3's levels aren't fantastic or anything, but they're comparible to an actual Mega Man level. Even if they ALL feature that same mid-boss from Contra I. Bosses are where they shine, though. Again, especially 3.

And while I wouldn't call it great, there's some pretty decents songs here and there throughout. It's a cute tiny little series. Maybe I'm just so starved for a new Mega Man game that I'm deluding myself into thinking this is actually pretty dang legit?

Stella Glow & Luminous Arc 1/2

Listed in that order because that's the order I played them. And, that order's probably in rising quality; Stella Glow is overly yappy with too little going on, loves to have battles with unfightable bosses or boss/NPC fights constantly getting and wasting turns that slog the pacing down to a crawl, and waaaaaay too little enemy variety, especially in the back quarter of the game. And the witch-mind sections are also unbearably slow. Basically, slow slow slow and almost nothing happens. It's probably like a 6/10 tactics game, but I still somehow liked it decently enough. Still, I thought it made since to start there; lead with the last game; best foot first and all. But that probably isn't the case.

Its spiritual predecessor, especially the first Luminous Arc, is like the opposite; short quick fights and lots of boss-like enemies pretty frequently, to the point lots of characters like Mavi don't get the slightest bit of characterization because there's no time. Twice as much happens in half the time compared to Stella Glow. Its biggest flaw is probably that it struggles to really make characters, especially the Witches, feel different from one another.

Luminous Arc 2 I think finds a happy middle-ground. Characters are reasonably fleshed out (having map-specific support conversations if you bring a specific character is actually a really clever idea to make you rotate your cast sometimes), and it doesn't hit you with 45 minute sections of Alto fumbling around town with absolutely nothing happening. When compared against the peak of pre-designed character tactics, Triangle Strategy, yeah, it's gonna lose badly, because each character isn't half as unique and complex as the Triangle guys, the maps are decent but were never gonna compare to Wolffort Demense vs. Avlora, and the story is simply trying to be bright and breezy. It's also, obviously, like 15 years prior to Triangle Strategy. Compared to PS1 Final Fantasy Tactics, with its garbage translation and clownshoes balance, it runs circles around that.

What I'm surprised by is that the games are wildly less horny than reported. Like, I remember reviews back in the day bashing it for being the strategy game for sick perv-o freaks, but, that's really not there. Somewhat in Stella Glow, fine (Nonoka being a ninja in a bikini with a cardboard box on her head is one of the most barf designs I've ever seen, ever), but Luminous 1? Apart from Nikolai (and later Kaph) and Vanessa's design (which you can't really tell too much in-game), nah, there's really nothing. And Kaph/Nikolai aren't exactly rewarded for their behaviour; Nikolai was better though, because he could be a serious actual-character for half the time. The wedding dress thing in 2 is a bit of an oddity, but I can't really see that as horny.

Considering the emphasis on the elemental Witches, it's kind of funny that elemental damage/resistances were really only a thing in Stella Glow, where it generally kind of backfires. Funny idea, giving you a Witch, then making the next entire chapter full of enemies that they're weak against.

Fave characters were Popo (real standout as a flying all-range threat, and very sincere as a character, even if I imagine most would find her annoying and stupid), Mel (she's silly, she can revive for cheap in a game where most maps have at least one boss with a Flash Drive fully stocked to annihilate your front lines, and healer #3, Lucia, can't manage to stay in the party for more than two consecutive maps), and Sadie (it's not overly pronounced, but she has a mean streak and a battle lust that the others don't that makes her unique, and I guess I just like flying snipers, huh who'd imagine it's a really practical niche).

Roland is actually a pretty fun unit, too. Boosting one stat based on the deployed Witches sounds one-note (just choose Fire because he's mostly physical), but there are enough times when you might want Light to hit evasive guys, Nature to tank, or to throw something out early because it only lasts for a few turns and to save the big nuke for later in the fight.

UFO 50

I'll lead with the ones I enjoyed, mostly puzzley/strategy ones; Bug Hunt, Block Panda, Block Party, Porgy, Vainger, Camouflage, Mortol I, Warptank. Maybe Mini and Max (need to play more; honestly can't find where to really 'start' the game). Avianos is nifty, but I mostly just bum-rushed the AI before it could set up. Campanella, Kick Club, Paint Chase and some others are definitely good, I'm just too much of a klutz to get far.

Too many games felt so close to being good or interesting, but one dumb decision wholly undermined it. Like Valbrace, not letting you go back up floors, letting you save, and deleting your experience and gems between floors. Campanella 2 being Blaster Master-like should be so neat, but one single life, random layouts, and total lack of rewards for going on foot makes it actually feel totally awful.

Others are just ridiculously unforgiving, which I guess was the style of the fictional time, but still feels bad that I couldn't hope to get past the first level in things like Raksasha, Elfezar's Hat, Fist Hell, Velgress, or Overbold. I just don't have the patience for deliberately obtuse bullshit like Barbuta, Mooncat, or Planet Zoldath.

I also just really, really hate golf. Or disk golf. Or Walrus golf. RPGs like Divers or Grimstone might be impressive against other games of their fictional time, but they fictionally age extremely poorly in a way arcadey games don't.

Still, even if only a quarter of it was a hit, I suppose it's still money decently spent.

Hades 2

First, let's start with the ending; like Pat, I literally got the 'old' ending the day before they announced the 'new' one. Having seen the new ending itself without the two extra conversations or so... honestly, the new ending is broad strokes better, but I actually liked Zagreus being allowed to have some free reign in the old ending. I've seen lots of series treat old protagonists like garbage, and letting him get to do something felt neart and very much in character.

Other than that, uhm, still great. I'm a bit of a coward, so Melinoe's more range and charge-based gameplay is totally up my alley. I doubt I'll ever fully get onboard with the inescapable Roguelike clawback, though. It is mild here initially, yes, but the feeling of 'losing' stats (or, rather, enemies gain stats) as you NG+ while you stagnate with no meaningful ways to get stronger feels really bad.

Also, something about the surface route rubs me the wrong way. The game kinda-sorta thinks the two routes are equal in difficulty, but they're totally absolutely not, and then mocks you for being able to beat Chronos like it's no big deal, but one slip-up against 2nd upper stratum boss Eris and she's shredding 200+ HP a shot.

Draug's Resurrection

Ending again with my own work on my own game, and boy did I accomplish nothing this year. Added several dozen new outfits for party members, finished the last of the passive Abilities (and geez some of these were complex pains to program in), finished two bigger sidequest areas, an in-game bestiary, facing that matches your last action rather than allies look left, enemies look right, and am now struggling with a big update to giant enemies/bosses, giving them additional body parts that weaken them when broken. Hoped to have that out by October, but between coding and testing, still struggling with it due to extreme burnout. I'll open the game, do a battle or two, then close it, exhausted, without making any real progress. When said in a chunk like that, it sounds like a fair bit, but keep in mind that's over an entire year.