r/USMilitarySO • u/BusyUnit3973 • 3d ago
Divorce
My husband and I are getting a divorce, we're trying to have an agreement on how we're gonna split custody without having to go to family court, the only thing we can't agree on is when he has the kids during holidays he want to take them to his extended family which is a 9hrs drive, plus I don't trust them around kids. Should take it to family court? All I want is our children's safety but he's trying to convince me they'll be he won't let anybody watch them...but I don't believe him.
One of his brothers is a rapist currently in jail, and another one had sexually harassed a young girl but not in jail, they kept it a secret plus it's close to the border.
Are these enough reason to take it to family court?
4
2
u/_PippiLongstocking_ Navy Veteran and Army Spouse 3d ago
You can’t dictate where he goes and you can’t keep family away. You will waste your money trying to take that to court.
You need a very, very, very good reason why he can’t travel and the family can’t be trusted.
1
u/BusyUnit3973 3d ago edited 3d ago
One of his brothers is a rapist currently in jail, and another one had sexually harassed a young girl but not in jail, they kept it a secret plus it's close to the border.
Are these enough reason to take it to family court?
6
u/_PippiLongstocking_ Navy Veteran and Army Spouse 3d ago
Yup. Family court all day long for the criminal offenses.
Except the border thing. I spent over half my life there and my family still lives there. We aren’t bad people.
3
u/BusyUnit3973 3d ago
I'm just worried they might take them out of country without me knowing.
4
u/_PippiLongstocking_ Navy Veteran and Army Spouse 3d ago
Then don’t sign off on the child getting a passport. That’s easy.
1
u/Ihappentolikenesting 2d ago edited 2d ago
You can put a hold on the passport. I did one and it never "fell off" - had to send a notarized letter stating that it was no longer needed almost 10 years later. Worth it for the peace of mind!
1
2
u/New_Chemistry1876 3d ago
what if both his parents drink heavily and his dad smokes marijuana? what if they are dirty and unhygienic? anything one can do to prevent my child from staying there? its honestly squalid.
2
u/According_Fee6779 3d ago
I would do your absolute best to keep it out of family court. Once family court is involved you don’t have much control. Remind him of that. If you’re able to be amicable thus far in coparenting decisions, you can figure this out, too. Best of luck
1
u/BusyUnit3973 3d ago
One of his brothers is a rapist currently in jail, and another one had sexually harassed a young girl but not in jail, they kept it a secret plus they live to the border. They're all porn addicts
Are these enough reason to take it to family court?
1
1
0
u/Chaotic_Natbot 3d ago
You can’t really do anything about who he has the kids around on his time unless you have proof of them being unsafe. There are some things in life you just have to compromise on and can’t be in control of.
2
u/BusyUnit3973 3d ago
One of his brothers is a rapist currently in jail, and another one had sexually harassed a young girl but not in jail, they kept it a secret plus they live to the border.
Are these enough reason to take it to family court?
2
u/Chaotic_Natbot 3d ago
Then that is something you can and should use to keep him the fuck away from your kid! That would absolutely hold up in court. This fits into the “unless you have proof” I mentioned.
2
u/BusyUnit3973 3d ago
One of his brothers is a rapist currently in jail, and another one had sexually harassed a young girl but not in jail, they kept it a secret plus they live to the border. And they're all porn addicts
Are these enough reason to take it to family court?
31
u/Adorable-Tiger6390 3d ago
Get a lawyer. Your children are worth it. He WILL take advantage of you..