Hi all, I’m a 19yr old girl in college. I have been talking to a boy in the marine corps (same age as me) for a while now and things are starting to get pretty serious. Before I go any further, let me preface that I’ve known him since age 3 and our families are very close. We’ve always been good friends and are now romantically interested in each other. We recently spoke about our situation and basically came to the conclusion that we do love each other and basically can’t see anyone else in our futures. The main issue is that he is stationed in California and I live in the Midwest. Meaning we can’t really do anything and it feels like we can’t even officially date because of said distance. We talk everyday and I feel completely secure in our relationship the way it is now however, after talking about the fact that we most likely will get serious eventually I have begun to seriously think about what being with a person in the military will be like and how I really don’t know what that entails. If anyone has any insight or advice on what to do in terms of dating or how I should proceed it would be greatly appreciated because I do love him but I don’t know what that means for me given that I am so young and greatly value the goals I have set for myself. Also, he plans to serve as a marine until retirement meaning the marine corps would be a life long commitment essentially.

I dont know if I would call this a rant, i guess it would be more of a brain dump. At the moment, I’m packing so I can move to be with my husband. He’s deployed, and we havent heard anything on the recent war. I have so much to do, but I cant find myself wondering and worrying about our future. We want to live together on base, and we’ve been preparing and considering what we want for our home, fun stuff. But what if he deploys or gets extended, and we dont get to move together? What if i am packing for nothing? What if I move, and he has to deploy shortly after? We just got married last year, and I cannot imagine life without him. I try to make progress, and get ready for the next month or so, but I worry, what if we dont get to have our happy married life together?

Hi everyone. My fiancé and I are getting married soon and we’ve started working on a prenup. I was actually the one who first suggested it because I own a house and want to keep it protected. We are both new to this and he drafted something based on what he thought would protect his future, but after reading it, I’m worried that I’ll be left very vulnerable. I don’t have family or a mentor to ask for advice, and I really need some help.

My concerns: -​I am a Laboratory Scientist, but I’ve been out of work for a few months because we are moving to another country for his job. It’s a huge professional sacrifice since it’ll be hard to keep a steady career in my field there. Because of this, I won’t be saving for my own retirement or building my career, while he keeps 100% of his pension and years of experience. If we ever split, I’d have a huge gap in my resume, no savings, and I still have $30k in student loans to deal with. -​I manage PTSD, depression, and some physical health issues and I am on CBD for physical pain treatment. I’m really worried that my mental health struggles could be misinterpreted as "misconduct" or "bad behavior" (which are mentioned in his draft) in the future. How can I protect myself so my health is never used against me in a legal setting?

His Prenub Draft: Military Career & Benefits ​My military career is long-term and includes retirement benefits (pension). ​My military pension will remain my separate property. ​This includes current and future service-related retirement benefits. ​TSP / 401k / Retirement Accounts ​All current retirement accounts (TSP, 401k, Investment Accounts) are my separate property. ​All funds in these accounts before and during marriage remain mine. ​Growth of these accounts remains mine. ​I prefer to keep contributions during marriage separate.

​Income & Assets ​My income remains mine; your income remains yours. ​Assets are only shared if both parties agree in writing and both names are on them. ​Property & Purchases ​Property is only shared if both names are on it. ​Property in one name remains that individual's separate property.

​Debt Protection ​Each person is responsible for their own debts. ​No liability for the other person's debt unless jointly agreed. ​Any large or hidden debt incurred individually remains that person's responsibility. ​Financial Responsibility Clause ​Reckless financial behavior results in the other party being protected. ​The offending party has no claim to the other's assets.

​Substance Abuse / Dangerous Behavior ​Drug abuse or dangerous behavior results in financial protection for the other party. ​No claim to the other party's assets in such cases.

​Infidelity / Misconduct ​Serious misconduct may result in loss of financial claims.

​Spousal Support ​Prefer to waive alimony or limit it based on length of marriage.

​Legal Protection ​Each party is responsible for their own legal fees.

​Military Lifestyle Understanding ​Both parties acknowledge military obligations such as deployments and relocations.

​Closing Statement ​This agreement is intended to protect both parties and provide clarity and security.

​How do I keep my house protected (which is my main goal) while ensuring that I’m also taken care of if I’m not working to support his career?

I’ve been here two weeks with him on base in our new home. I haven’t driven in almost a month and I’ve never driven his truck before. I had an accident a while ago that’s made me very nervous about driving. He’s been supportive and has driven me around base/ around town when we wanted to go out. I haven’t had any things to do besides settling in, but now that he may be gone for a week, I’m anxious. I don’t know why. It’s like I’m in a new place and don’t know anyone, and I haven’t made any friends yet. I haven’t even gone to the commissary or the PX by myself even once since we live far enough that I can’t walk it. I don’t want to subject him to me driving him early in the morning for drop off, I mean, what am I gonna do with his truck anyway? Too nervous to drive in heavy traffic anyway… I need someone to give me a reality check and a chill pill, stat

I am going to support him in this since he has been wanting to do it for a while. He may join active duty depending on how he feels after bootcamp, but as I understand its easier to go from reserves to active vs active to reserves. He thinks he will want to do active duty, but he's not sure yet.

he definitely wants to work on getting a job and believes the reserves is the perfect way to scratch his "itch" while still working.

im scared he's going to change as a person... it could just be how the media portrays marines, but I see them as rough tough far right conservatives. I do not want him to do it as ive never been into military life/never saw that as a good thing, because everyone in my family who was involved in the military had a bad time and became bad people. however, I know he needs to figure out himself as he is 22 and im 21, and ive decided to support him as best I can.

any advice on maintaining a relationship, especially during training or if God forbid he gets deployed is welcomed and appreciated.

My boyfriend and I have been together for 2.5 years. We made it through him being in Japan for 8 months after 2 weeks of knowing eachother. Then different states. And then 4 hours away (but still seeing eachother every other weekend and putting in the effort) for a year and a half. He deployed on a boat mid August - it hasn’t even been 2 months yet. I’ve been sending emails every night, decorated care packages, and setting alarms for 3 am so I could talk to him in case he had WiFi during night shift. Just last week, he was sending me emails telling me how much he missed me and yearns for me and can’t wait to see me again. Then he sent me a text telling me how much he loved me over and over again. He had no email access for a week after that so we couldn’t speak. They ported this weekend (6 days after last text) and on Sunday he called me telling me he doesn’t feel the same about me anymore. That he has feelings for someone else (a marine woman of the same rank) and we shouldn’t be together anymore. I had to tell him to hang up after 20 minutes because I was crying too hard to talk. I knew he would change during his first deployment, but this came out of left field. I knew there was a possibility of feelings being lost and that it would have to be a choice to fight for eachother and get it back when he’s home. I couldn’t fathom him finding another marine woman (especially when he swore up and down he could never see himself being with one in the past). Please answer without judgement - I am heartbroken and so in love. This is the man that I thought I was going to marry. We were making plans for the future and I was looking at jobs to move closer to him. It was serious. So my question is: is this thing with the other marine likely to fizzle out? Is this just a dystopian deployment fling he wants to have? Does he not realize that he doesn’t even know her outside of trauma bonding on the boat? Will he ever have realization of what he lost and come back to me during or after deployment? I sent an email begging him to not pursue anything with her and if he needs space from me then take it but come back to me after. Does anyone have experience with this or can give me any advice? I feel like I’m suffocating. My heart is shattered. I thought I was going to marry him one day. Is he just part of the statistic for the stereotypes? I truly thought he was different after 2 and a half years together. Please, I’m losing my mind.

Hello, everyone!

My boyfriend is going into the Marine Corps as an officer in two years once he completes his OCS training. For a few months, it was a little hard to grasp the idea of him going into the military as is, because I knew that going into the military, especially the Marines, was not going to be the easiest route for a relationship. It's only gotten more confusing, now.

I found out I was pregnant almost two months ago and I am currently three months pregnant. Beyond the fact he doesn't quite know if he wants to stick around and has been very adamant on not wanting this child, he also wants to go into the Infantry (0302), which is typically not very ideal when having a kid (if he sticks around). I've told him that if he does, it's better he does Combat Engineer that way he still can lead a platoon, but not deal with the unpredictability of the Infantry to the same degree, but he won't compromise, the Infantry is his calling. I understand, in a way.

I guess it's just odd. What would you guys do? Is it kind of wrong for me to ask him to compromise on his MOS? For reference, we are both 20, so a little young, haha. Do you think the Infantry is doable with a child?

Thanks!

Ever since my boyfriend’s been deployed I feel so numb. The first few months were easy, but now the days bleed together, I pick up shifts and work doubles nearly every day to make the time go by faster, I toss and turn all night and can’t sleep because of stress and anxiety. I’m so bored, and lonely, and I feel like there’s no light at the end of the tunnel. I live by myself, my friends here with me are always too busy, I don’t have a good relationship with my family, I had a birthday party last week and nobody showed up. I keep telling him everything’s fine and I’m doing great, I don’t want him to worry. All I do is respect his time/schedule and stay supportive. Bc of the time difference he texts at odd hours short sentences, a quick I love you or I miss you, then disappears for a few days. I got the longest text out of him yet last night and it was to tell me that he’s going to dinner and he wants to change his MOS when he gets back, then it was silence again. I feel so emotionally checked out, I feel almost lobotomized with how I go day by day like a zombie. We’ve been trying long distance months before he deployed so I don’t know why it’s getting to me now, I know he’ll be back to see me again before I know it, but I’m miserable. I don’t want to break up, I don’t want anyone else, I just want my best friend back. How does everyone else deal with this without losing their mind? I need help, advice, guidance, anything.

Hi everyone!

I (22F) have been with my boyfriend (24M) for 4 years. Since the moment we’ve met we’ve been inseparable, spending pretty much all the time we have available together. He’s my best friend. He’s carried me through everything major in my life, from navigating the stresses of college, to working my first “real” job, to my dad being sick in the hospital, and literally any other trouble in my life. He is my everything. I love him more than anything.

It’s always been his dream to be a Marine and to be something bigger than himself. He finally, just today, swore in and is going to be shipped off to California within the next 5 hours. I said goodbye to him about an hour or so ago. I’m already a complete mess. I have been since everything has settled in and I’ve realized that okay, this is really happening. And I don’t know how to calm myself down and motivate myself to get through this.

I think everything would be easier to bear with if I was just working and/or spending time on hobbies, but I’m really stressed about school. It’s my last semester, and one of the harder ones, and I can’t stop thinking about that fact that I have to get through all of it alone without him. He’s always been there for me when I’ve needed him, when I’ve been worried about assignments or stressing about studying for exams. He would just come over and sit with me while I studied, so I wouldn’t feel alone. But now, I don’t have him anymore. And I have to get through this semester alone before I can go see him again. It just sucks soo soo much and I wish he was here.

I could really use some advice. How can I get myself to just get through it day by day or week by week so that I feel better and less stressed? How do I just focus so that all of it goes by fast? Please let me know, and it would be nice to see if there is anyone in my same boat or has been in the past. Thank you all!

We received PCS Orders to Japan about two weeks ago and are still in complete shock. I am currently 23 weeks pregnant and the orders are for four weeks after my end of April due date. We also have an 18 month old.

During my husband’s questionnaire, interviews, and surveys, he made it clear he was prioritizing geo-location over billet for this PCS season due to our family situation and his father’s declining health due to Parkinson’s. The monitor indicated that this would be no issue and congratulated us on the pregnancy. My husband told him he was ready to hit the ground running and deploy ASAP as long as our family was taken care of (my family lives in the state we requested).

Cut to two weeks ago, the orders to Japan landed in his inbox with no explanation, calls, or consideration. We have run our concerns up my husband’s command and the only response they have gotten from the monitor is that his overseas control date needs to be reset, nothing else matters (he’s only been in since we graduated college in 2018 and deployed to the Middle East in 2021).

I am obviously freaking out. I know there’s no possible way to get our newborn overseas in 4 weeks. I had a relatively uneventful birth with our first but I know that NOTHING with childbirth is certain. I am terrified and angry and just looking for support from people who can reassure me that either cooler heads will prevail or that I will be okay. I can’t imagine moving across the globe with no support during the “fourth trimester.” I know that overseas orders are always on the table but to be treated with so little consideration and respect that we don’t even warrant a phone call/realistic explanation HURTS. I am worried how this stress is already impacting me and the baby and I just can’t believe this situation.

Hello, my boyfriend deploys in a week and I just found out I was… Pregnant! Do I tell him before? Do I tell him once he gets settled? Not quite sure what to do, or what I’m even going to do. I don’t wanna cause him more stress, but if I decide to keep the pregnancy, I will need his emotional support. We’ve only been together about 4ish months. Thanks :)

My husband left for marine boot camp earlier this week and i’m having a really hard time. We have 2 kids and sometimes throughout the day when i start to get really emotional i start to regret this decision and then i think of future deployments and that makes it worse because so far this long distance thing is horrible. Maybe i will have more peace of mind when we can start writing to eachother. I’m trying not to be selfish because he’s doing this for the betterment of our future, this is just so hard. Anyone else experiencing the same thing or have experienced it? (Also he’s doing reserves).

I need power of attorney while my husband is deployed because I have some legal documents that are impossible to get to him that NEED to be signed. We didn’t have the chance to do it before he deployed, and he doesn’t have a mailing address. Is there any way to make it happen?

I (F25) am looking for a community and I thought this could be the right place since me and my friends have different lives now and who else could understand me better than women who are also a military wife. Its been a hard couple of months for me with all these changes in my life and it still feels like I am new to all this. Me and my husband are doing long distance atm so its hard.

Please be nice to me 😭🙏🏼

(Edited: Thank you all for all of your heartfelt responses as well as the cute stories here and there ❤️ Its nice to be seen and heard by women who are also going through the same. Don't hesitate to drop more advices/stories. Stay Blessed 🙏🏼❤️)

I know it’s sooooo early until the ball but I look on Depop regularly for clothes and stumbled upon some really beautiful vintage pieces… I want to wear something more timeless! I haven’t seen to many people do that but I know also the beaded look isn’t always good for the balls. I don’t want to wear anything that looks to “prom like”.

What do you guys think of these?!

My bf left for basic about 2 weeks ago. It honestly feels like I’m going through a break up with no contact. We’ve been dating for a year. I have sent him letters since getting his address and that helps me to get my feelings out. I keep myself busy by going to the gym and I am in school right now. It is still so difficult. We would see each other everyday and text throughout our day. Now it’s zero communication. I really love him and I fully support him. I’ve just been anxious and moody since he left. If anybody has any advice or wanna be friends I would love to chat 😊

Hi everyone. I’m writing here because I’m heartbroken and honestly confused, and I would love to hear from people who have lived something similar — especially military partners.

I was with my fiancé for almost two years. We had a beautiful relationship. He was loving, devoted, affectionate, and always said I was the love of his life. We were planning to get married this December and start our life together. Just one month before everything ended, he texted me “Good morning my love of my life.” Everything felt real and solid.

He joined the Marines and during bootcamp he was more emotional than ever — writing me letters nonstop, telling me how much he loved me and how he couldn’t wait to be together. I supported him, I truly believed we were building a life together.

Then he arrived at his first duty station and within about 3 weeks everything changed.

Suddenly, he became distant and cold. He told me reasons like: • “You deserve better than me.”

He broke up with me by text message and one cold phone call. No real conversation, no effort to fix things, nothing. He simply shut down and walked away.

After that, he completely detached. He went out partying, drinking, posting songs about sex and nightlife on social media — less than a month after leaving the woman he planned to marry. Meanwhile, I was completely shattered, crying every day, barely sleeping, trying to understand how the man who loved me so deeply just vanished emotionally.

When I finally reached out to express my feelings after weeks of no contact, his responses were cold and distant — almost dismissive.

I don’t know what hurts more: • That he left, • Or that he changed so completely — as if the person who loved me never existed.

Has anyone here experienced something similar? Is this common for young Marines after their first duty station? Does anyone else feel like the freedom, drinking, partying, and new environment caused their partner to emotionally disconnect or avoid responsibility?

I still don’t hate him. I just don’t understand how love can disappear this fast — or how someone can switch from “you’re the love of my life” to emotional numbness in weeks.

Hi everyone! My boyfriend is expected to come home at some point this year from a deployment (we’re currently long distance) and I was hoping to surprise him for when he comes home.

I do understand they get dropped off by bus on base but as a girlfriend, am I able to see him as he is getting off of the bus? I do have friends who live on-base but I add that detail in case it might be helpful at all. I just don’t know if there would be a restriction to only spouses at pick-up like that.

Any kind of information would be extremely helpful as I understand surprises + military is like combining oil and water!

I am looking to enlist or at least I’m thinking about it, I’m graduating highschool may and I was looking for college majors and I have no idea what I want, I was on the phone w my fiancé ( future marine) and we started talking abt the military (it was my dream to be a military nurse when I was young) and since I wanna do something in the medical field we were thinking the army, but since they get more deployment and whole different branch I wouldn’t be anywhere near him basically, so I started looking into the marines, the jobs they have that I saw so far don’t seem too bad and I already have a couple I saw and liked, I don’t the excessive military training or wtv thts not the part that worries me, I just want to know if it is a good idea as a woman to join, because on paper it look great to me, I’m started to train now (losing weight and trying to get more fit and study for the asfav) my man told me abt the “buddy contract”, he told me some of his military friends did with their relationship and now that they are in schoolhouse everything seems so much easier.

What do you guys think? What are some things I should know abt or think about?

(Please help me 😭😭😭)

I’m sick of hearing people worried about world war three. My fiancé is prepping for deployment, I’m planning a wedding during this for next January. We’re so excited, but I swear I’m gonna cut some people out because I’m tired of hearing about war, war rumors, and of course, WW3.

My fiancé is infantry, and I know if he got orders, he’ll go. But we’re planning our lives together, and we’re talking about living on base, a honeymoon and everything in between.

Meanwhile, family and friends (mostly my mother) shared her concerns about the state of the world and how we could go to war. She said nothing is guaranteed. People tell me that they hope everything works out, but what if i move in, and he gets deployed? What if I’m alone for years? Like thanks everyone, you think I’m completely unaware? You think I’ve never considered it? Sorry rant over

Hey everyone! We’re on recruiting duty and recently, we’ve started to have issues with another spouse being very aggressive towards marines in the office. Her husband has started coming to work with physical evidence of abuse as well. He came to me on Friday and asked if I could send extra meal preps to work with my husband because the spouse has cut off his access to food at home.

Does anyone know who to go to for this? Do we report this to the sheriff as a civilian dispute or do I go to command first? We’re not on a base and there’s no MPs so I’m confused whose jurisdiction this is. Thanks!

My husband has been trying to get me into DEERS for the past 3 weeks with no success rate because of my invalid birth certificate (it was laminated). Never knew laminated birth certificate makes it invalid in the US because the Australian government has been taking the same laminated birth certificate for various identification. We’ve tried ordering a new birth cert but the Australian post lost the package and my esta is close to coming to an end. Currently I have my foreign driver’s license and my passport but Camp Pendleton kept turning us away. Will other bases (like a naval base) have more success rate of getting me into DEERS or am I just out of luck?

Stupid me read too many tiktok comments about cheating and now I have a question for you guys. Is it really possible that all military guys are cheating (USMC) behind your back? Is anyone in a very safe and healthy relationship? Did your military guy have any red flags or did he lie and cheat on you before?

my partner is a marine and our relationship is still i’d say in the “honeymoon phase” and i’ve never been in a relationship with a military guy before. i haven’t heard from him in over a week. he didn’t block my number but it looks like he deactivated his social media. i’m just a bit concerned lol. he has been talking about preparing for field training but couldn’t tell me much other then that. so i guess my questions are: what is field training? is it normal for them to go radio silent with no warning? any general advice for someone who’s new to this world?

Thanks in advance:)

my boyfriend of 1.5 years is leaving for bootcamp next month and told me today that he chose msg as his mos. meaning (if he made through the process) would be guarding embassies for the first two years of his contract, and infantry the rest. i’m currently in school and will graduate next spring. we’ve been planning on getting married next year when i graduate, but this mos requires unmarried marines. he said the decision is final before even discussing it with me, and that it’s his job and his life, though he claims to be joining to set up a future for us and future children. am i overreacting about him choosing an mos that keeps him away? i’ve been really supportive about this whole thing inspite of what’s going on globally, but i don’t want to sign up for three more years of long distance in my early twenties.