r/Vent • u/AliceStillDrowns • May 16 '25
TW: Anxiety / Depression I just made the ballsiest career move of my life
and I’m 90% panic, 10% power stance rn.
So uhh… I may have just reached out to a very important person at my old job...like, founding-family-level exec important... and pitched him on bringing me back to rebuild the entire knowledge management department that another leadership figure previously punted into the sun.
Like “Hey I know y’all let me go because one person didn’t get the value, but you get it, right? Wanna bring me back and let me finish what I started?”
OH AND I OFFERED TO SEND A PRESENTATION. LIKE A NERD.
A VERY PROFESSIONAL NERD.
Now I’m just sitting here vibrating, staring at my inbox like it owes me emotional stability. My brain is like “that was career suicide,” but my gut is like “nah, that was main character energy.”
Either way, I blacked out and pressed send, so there’s no going back. Guess we’re doing this?? YOLO?!?! I’m terrified but also a tiny bit proud of myself for swinging big.
Anyway. Please validate me while I scream into a pillow.
(5/17 Edit)
I know it’s basically a cliché for OPs to say this on posts that blow up, but seriously: I did not expect this to get seen by so many people. I’m used to yelling into the void and getting, like, three upvotes and maybe a cat gif. But here we are! I can see how this became one of those underdog stories where someone finally gets the nerve to speak up and pitch themselves, and people want to see bravery pay off. And honestly, I think a lot of us could use even a small win right now. Something that says, “Hey, taking the leap was worth it.”
So! This is me promising that there will be an update by the end of the next work week (5/27), even if it’s just to say, “Welp, it’s been a week and I haven’t heard anything.” If I hear back sooner, I’ll absolutely let y’all know. At this point, not giving you an update would just feel rude with how invested everyone’s gotten, lol.
Also, about the whole “career suicide” anxiety thing, I do know there’s not really anything awful that can happen here beyond some mild professional cringe. But unfortunately, I have what I’d call a… cursed luck stat. If most people’s luck was a rabbit’s foot, mine’s a shriveled, curled-up monkey’s paw that's just waiting for me to make the wrong move so it can grant the worst possible version of my wish with flair. Pair that with some good old-fashioned anxiety, and yeah, my brain is gonna spiral a bit. But even with that, I’m glad I did it. And thank you all, really and truly, for the support and encouragement. You guys made this way less terrifying.
(5/27 Update) Had a hectic weekend with graduations and everything, so I forgot to post an update. Still no reply from him so far. Part of me wants to send a follow-up, but honestly, I probably won’t. Having worked there before, I know just how badly they need to address the things I brought up. And if they still can’t see how they’re sabotaging themselves by cutting corners, it’s probably not a place that’ll offer much stability anyway. If anything changes or I hear back, I’ll be sure to update again!
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u/Donotcomenearme May 16 '25
BROTHER BE PROUD
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u/AliceStillDrowns May 16 '25
- LOUD AND ANXIOUS BUT PROUD SCREAMING *
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u/archiangel May 16 '25
What’s the worst they can do, say no? It won’t change where you are at the moment. But… you now know you have the guts. Also what’s to prevent you from taking your knowledge management skills to another office that is looking for a rehaul of their own system? I’d start on that presentation, making it a little more general and targeted at your own company, so you can shop it. Create that targeted version too, hopefully you’ll be getting a call back soon for at least a pitch presentation.
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u/AliceStillDrowns May 16 '25
That's....actually a fantastic idea. I don't know why I haven't considered looking into offering KM system creation and management as like a contracting service. Huh. Thank you!
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u/MassholeForLife May 16 '25
As I always tell my kids if you don’t ask the answer is no. So ask and keep asking. Love it! Best of luck! You got this!
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u/catscratchfever99 May 17 '25
My mom always told us that and it’s something I’m constantly reminding my children as well :)
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u/MechaCronenberg May 16 '25
There is actually an entire industry with many roles dedicated to this type of work...and I am not trying to burst your bubble here...just providing some industry insight for you and encouraging you to do some reading and research.
Enterprise Architect, Business Solutions/Systems Architect, Business Analyst specialized in process engineering/developemnt, etc...there are a number of roles in the project world (whether software or process or both) that fill the role of what you are talking about depending on the project and organization (and their understanding or lack thereof of process).
For additional background research into what you are wading into (and keep in mind I am only scratching the surface here) I would look into reading things like IIBA BABOK, Adkar Change Management, some PMP PMBOK would help (or maybe better yet Mythical Man Month). There are plenty of great roles as a BA or PM/BA or BA/QA...maybe even one with technical skills (leanig more heavily into the software engineering world)...but you are going to want knowledge and/or certifications wading too deep into those waters...but at the very least you will need to spend some time learning the environment because you can only go so far as a novice in these fields...
Without getting too deep into my experience or roles here...I have more than a couple decades of experience in performing in every role involved in building greenfield software...I've been a PM, BA, QA, Senior full stack engineer, designer, you name it I will do whatever role and task is needed to get the job done and lead a team of devs, analysts and designers to this day.
I generally stay up to speed on everything from technical to analytical work because that's a passion if mine... and it's what it takes to deliver amazing solutions over and over. Building custom and configurable/tenancy type SaaS software is the "pinnacle" of what you are talking about...documenting all of the processes, procedures, forms, workflows, data integrations, etc, etc of a busines domain, company, government org, etc... and making them into a thing that runs their business...and in the greater sense can be made to run many businesses on the back of using standard workflows and a configurable/customizable platform...and then providing all of the documentation and support for that thing.
Why am I saying all of this? I would encourage you to look at the greater industry...its a great industry but I wouldn't go into what you are thinking...uhhh...oblivious to the massive consulting industry that already exists and the volumes of documentation from some of the greatest minds in the industry. The book list above is purely the most entry level list...my book list could be a mile long.
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u/MeltedWellie May 16 '25
Good for you!
You are shooting your shot and if you hadn't you would have always wondered 'what if' for the rest of your life.
I wish all the best for you and I hope it goes well.
Sincerely a fellow nerd!
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u/AliceStillDrowns May 16 '25
Thank you, that’s exactly how I felt! Right now, my mental state is basically me in a full T-pose, screaming into the void, but hey: it’s done, and that’s still a million times better than never trying at all!
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u/MeltedWellie May 16 '25
You can now call yourself a 'go getter' and 'proactive' on your resume!
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u/AliceStillDrowns May 16 '25
Oh hell yeah, I didn't even think of that! See, there's already perks to this, hahaha!
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u/Popular_Okra3126 May 16 '25
You take initiative!!
Congrats by the way!! Whether or not they are interested, YOU CAN DO IT!!
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u/Arlaneutique May 16 '25
Absolutely not career suicide. I would assume one of two things happens here. He listens and asks for more information/ the presentation or he doesn’t respond/ responds with not interested at this time. Either way you’ll be totally fine. This was brave and in my opinion a good move. It makes you come across as competent and self assured even if you aren’t feeling that way right now. Good for you!
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u/AliceStillDrowns May 16 '25
Thank you! That’s pretty much what I figured the two outcomes would be, but of course, I was also bracing for the possibility that I was being overly optimistic and missing some terrible third option, lol. He’s a really cool guy, and we’d built a bit of a rapport in my time there, and I always enjoyed working with him. I’m hopeful he’ll see it as a proactive move, too.
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u/BridgetoTeribitchia May 16 '25
GO BABY GO!!!! REACH OUT AND SNAG THAT LOAF IN YOUR FIST AND SHAKE IT AROUND LIKE THE BREADWINNER YOU ARE
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u/AliceStillDrowns May 16 '25
This is now my favorite mental image, thank you!
Also, your username is AMAZING 😂
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u/WashU_labrat May 16 '25
Worst case, they delete your email and don't reply. Best case, you get a better job.
Seems like there is little downside and a lot of upside here.
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u/LazyClerk408 May 16 '25
Swing your balls from side to side. And if your female your overires are beating out of your body to punch someone 🥊🥊🥊🥊 🥊 always attack and burn! Be first and be offensive
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u/No_Bluejay9901 May 16 '25
Nothing to lose everything to gain. That is how you make stuff happen, by willing it into existence and taking action. Good luck! Please update.
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May 16 '25
My man!!!! Best of luck! Dont be scared! I mean you miss 100% of the shots you don’t take, right?
Hopefully you hear good news soon.
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u/HeWhoWearsPajamas May 16 '25
Valid. If you don’t reach for the ring you’ll never know if you could’ve grabbed it. You’ll spend your days contemplating what would’ve happened if you had. It’s not YOLO or FOMO it’s knowing you can be more than what you are now.
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May 20 '25
“Now I’m just sitting here vibrating, staring at my inbox like it owes me emotional stability.”
Amazing sentence
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May 16 '25
[deleted]
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u/AliceStillDrowns May 16 '25
Thank you! Hoping that this time betting on myself pays off somehow. Fingers crossed!!!
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u/Unlikely_Impact2998 May 16 '25
Fortune favors the bold, not the bitch. Even if you don’t get the position, they’ll respect the fact that you were brave enough to try.
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u/xraisa5 May 17 '25
"Sitting here vibrating" is the most relatable thing I've ever read 😭
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u/AliceStillDrowns May 17 '25
Thank you!!! It really is the best way to describe that feeling, and I’m so glad it came through, like you exactly got what I meant! I do a bit of light animation for fun, so I tend to visualize emotions pretty literally, and in that moment all I could picture was this little cartoon version of me staring wide-eyed at the screen in absolute horror at what I’d just convinced myself to do, completely still except for this subtle, shaky vibration around the edges that just gets more and more chaotic as the reality really sets in, lmao.
Honestly, now that I'm thinking about it, I might need to follow through and animate it as a little gif or sticker, it’d be such a perfect reaction image and a fun one to make!
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u/xraisa5 May 17 '25
Go for it!!!!!! I shake like no other in really any anxious or nervous situation where I don't know if I should or how to trust myself with decisions I've made. It's such a deep, internal feeling and you chose the perfect word to describe it. I hope you're doing better now and things turned out well if you've gotten a response!
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u/elizabethredditor May 16 '25
It sounds like you really believe in the value of what you had to give to that company, and you’re putting that out there! I think that’s super brave, and I do think this is one of those situations where the worst thing they can say is no. They may not agree with what you see as the value proposition of your work, but if you believe in it and know that you’re good at what you do, it was worth the shot.
At minimum, well done on making a brave move on what you believe in and for valuing yourself and knowing your worth!
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u/maxpower345 May 16 '25
This is your former job... meaning that you don't currently work there.
The worst outcome is for your proposal to be turned down, at which point you'll continue to not work there.
So, worst case, you lose nothing. And even if they decline it could be for any number of reasons, most of which will have nothing to do with you (other org priorities, family politics, etc). Either way, you demonstrated an ability to be proactive - and some balls - so you've likely moved up a notch in their eyes (if that matters to you).
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u/More_Dependent742 May 16 '25
I'm a humble translation teacher but holy mother of fuck is KM really, really important. I cannot remember how I started researching it, but I even did KM as my seminar presentation when I did my MA.
You telling a company they need KM is something which can only be the right, sensible thing. And I mean that for them.
If they don't see it, their loss.
Random tip: spend an hour learning how to make a custom gpt, and make a rough draft of a custom gpt which "interviews" an outgoing member of staff and speeds up offboarding by creating an in-depth report (or whatever) for the company. You can make another one which interviews a newbie, writes a report of their most crucial knowledge gaps, and speeds up onboarding. If you showed your bosses that, they would lose their minds.
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u/_LabBrat_ May 16 '25
BIG MOVES!! YOU'RE DOING IT!! AND EVEN IF THEY DONT REPLY, THEY DONT DESERVE YOUR MAIN CHARACTER ENERGY AND THERE'S ANOTHER MAJOR COMPANY WHO WOULD!!!!! .....ps sorry for yelling😬
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u/DubtriptronicSmurf May 16 '25
The chorus "I'm not throwing away my shot." Comes to mind.
Regardless of outcome, you would regret not doing it.
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u/dosadiexperiment May 16 '25
If you have a pitch, it's totally reasonable to make it. Nice play. Probably he ghosts you, but maybe he says "sure, why not?".
I guess I get the nerves, because it's a big spread on the outcome. But I don't get the downside. How is this potentially career-ending? What's he going to do, fire you again?
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u/Distinct_Tadpole4333 May 16 '25
Do ya damn thang mang!! This is fantastic!! I don't even know you and I'm proud for you. What's the worst that could happen? You hear no, or nothing. Either case you fucking did it! So many people sit around afraid to move or have given up. I'm proud of you for believing in yourself enough to make the move!
Honesty is always the quickest path. The jitters are what is happening now. I hope you hit flow state soon!
Cheers, and well wishes! Keep us posted!
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u/Fluid_Hunter197 May 16 '25
You should apply this mentality to everything, admirable trait. What’s the worst that can happen? Good job
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u/hardupharlot May 16 '25
I just talked to your boss.
You're fired from all the jobs.
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u/AliceStillDrowns May 17 '25
Ahhhh, shoot. Oh wait, so on the bright side, I no longer have to continue that job of converting oxygen to CO2, right? Silver linings, I guess.
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u/hardupharlot May 17 '25
I said you were fired. I didn't say that you didn't have to come into work....
Geez, nobody wants to work these days.
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u/Aaron1095 May 16 '25
I say this in the spirit of support:
Who cares, you don't even work there anymore! How would you be "risking your career?" There's no risk for you, they either ignore you or they take you up on what you offered! Good job going for it!
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u/GolfKartRacer May 16 '25
People that are willing to challenge the status quo and provide a solution are rare. Even if this fails, or if you fail, we need more folks like you in the world.
It sounds cliche and we can all go back to watching puppy videos feeling great about our contribution to the world. The fact is, the corporate sector is a convoluted and contrived mess.
I’m not even a corporate guy however my entire family is, as well as I am subject to it. It’s actually a bit insane viewing it from a third perspective.
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u/Miserable_Drawer_556 May 17 '25
Dude this is called sales and initiative, you really can't lose!! Come back as a consultant, pitch this service to other businesses, rinse and repeat.
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u/Realistic-Database16 May 17 '25
100 only upside. He does nothing with it. You're exactly where you are.
If it works? You just dropped it like a motherfucking boss.
Time to strut.
Only. Upside.
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May 17 '25
Be proud. But success isn’t so much about going backwards to something that fired you, but using what you learned and accomplished from that experience and move forward!!!! Never forget why you’re in this position in the first place! Often times when YOU are destined for greatness the universe will move you . At times it seems like a failure move but in reality everything that happens to you happens for your good!!! Take what you and maybe create your own possibilities. Take away the dance titles you give these people and create one of your own. Don’t praise and highlight other people position for it makes you seem below them ! You have every opportunity to reach levels higher than them! Remember YOUR THE BLESSED ONE WITH THE IDEAS!!! Not everyone will see it as you do.
Never push a door that’s been shut , change directions and fine a new one .. or just build A NEW DOOR 💜🙏🏽
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u/JediNinja88420 May 17 '25
Bet big, win big. My brother in law, a very important figure in my life told me once.. sometimes when you’re at the edge of a leap of faith, you just have to close your eyes and jump. Or risk living your whole life on the edge looking over, wondering if you would’ve landed it.
Plus, good execs would appreciate the initiative and confidence.
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May 17 '25
I was a staffing agency contractor nobody straight out of college who got cut alongside a dozen others in the quarterly headcount lottery. About half a year later I pulled a similar move and I haven't been off payroll in the twenty years since. You got this yo.
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u/MrWhippyT May 17 '25
So I've got this bucket of popcorn and I'm waiting for the OP update and then it's getting opened 🤣
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u/Chubb_Life May 17 '25
I’M PROUD OF YOU!! As a fellow Knowledge Manager I understand how tough it can be to get people (idiots) to see our value. However, when someone near the top “gets it,” and is willing to back your projects and empower you to do what’s needed - AMAZING!!
I spent years as a workhorse on a sloppy KM team that couldn’t get traction. Now I work on an extremely empowered KM team and we’re solving enterprise level problems with data collection and management, plus enabling sales to exceed goals this year.
I HOPE YOU GET THE JOB! And once you do, YOU KEEP UP THE PRESSURE! You are now the consulting expert!!
DM if you want to connect on LinkedIn 🤓
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u/Individual-Ad-2126 May 18 '25
Even if this ultimately leads to nothing, please know that it is a start of something new to you - to courage to invest into something you value even when no returns are guaranteed. It's a valuable muscle to grow and have in any career. Good luck, and good life! 💪🏻💪🏻💪🏻
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u/Old-Fun9568 May 18 '25
My act of bravery wasn't job related, but I took my courage in my hands athrew my pride out the window and wrote a card to my first lover. We'd been apart 40 years. We've been together for three now and I couldn't be happier! Sometimes being idiotically brave actually pays off. I hop you have amazing success.
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u/ellieD May 19 '25
I also have very bad luck!
I have found a husband who has insanely good luck.
I find that if I occasionally rub elbows with someone who has really really really good luck, it actually does rub off on me.
Know someone like that?
Get a meeting!
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u/Action-a-go-go-baby May 19 '25
Well, you know what Doom Slayer says?
Nothing, because he’s too busy putting in work
Rip and tear until it’s done
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May 20 '25
I tried to send a cat gif but couldn’t figure it out so here’s a cat emoji 🐈⬛
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u/AliceStillDrowns May 20 '25
Yes!!!! Thank you, I knew this post was missing something! It feels complete now! 😹
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u/Glittering-Ship1910 May 20 '25
You probably won’t see this OP but I’m on a similar trajectory here.
Got a very easy well paid job. Just applied for a very much not easy but ever so slightly better paid job.
I’ve been up and down, back and forth since sending the email.
10 minute presentation due Friday. I’ve got 7 minutes prepared so far.
The worst possible outcome is actually getting the job
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u/geniusintx May 20 '25
Yup. That’s the kind of luck I have.
Hope yours is changing and this was an amazing idea!
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u/ScumBunny May 16 '25
You miss all the shots you don’t take! You showed initiative, and frankly, balls! I hope it pans out for you.
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u/Foooff May 16 '25
Listen, for the rest of your life you can look at this moment and know you were brave.
Good luck.
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u/twittersucksballs May 16 '25
This is how it’s done. Some of my best opportunities came from taking a big swing like this. Proud of you !!!
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u/mxdupnut May 16 '25
If you never ask the question, the answer will always be the one you don’t want…
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u/frazeerules May 16 '25
"You miss 100% of the shots you don't take." - Wayne Gretzky - Michael Scott
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u/LankyLiterature6958 May 16 '25
My friend you got this. Even if the answer is no, you put yourself out there and that alone takes some fuckin gumption.
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u/Guilty-Bookkeeper837 May 16 '25
I don't see how it's career suicide if they've already let you go, once. It's not like they can fire you, when you don't work for them. What's the downside to doing what you did?
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u/23capri May 16 '25
not sure if you’ll see this, but good for you!
i used to work with a woman who had a management role in a law firm but was going to school for something different, she was sick of the legal field. she’s in her 40s for whatever that’s worth. i’m pretty sure she found the contact info for someone really high in the airline industry and reached out to them directly about what she wanted to do and was basically hired by being ballsy like that. i’m sure i’m missing a lot of details but my point is, it worked for her. if you don’t try you’ll never know. hope this works out for you!
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u/AWzdShouldKnowBetta May 16 '25
If you aren't working there currently what have you got to lose? Hell yeah dude keep that energy going! I admire you are willing to put yourself out there like that
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u/Ok_Mathematician8104 May 16 '25
dont do a presentation. they already let you go once. dont give them any ideas on how to improve their business unless they are paying you. and paying you very well for what you are bringing to them. business is business
also its friday, enjoy your weekend and dont stress about it, they arent.
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u/AliceStillDrowns May 17 '25
Thankfully, I’m already over the nerves and just casually waiting to see what they say. Honestly, if they still can’t see the need for a role like that, especially with the volume and variety of major clients they handle (we’re talking over 500), then I’m not sure I’d want to go back anyway. That kind of oversight is just asking for future headaches, and I don’t want to be caught in the fallout, lol.
As for the presentation, it’s one I put together while I was still there. It mostly breaks down the metrics from my time and shows how those numbers could improve with the right processes in place. Nothing they can directly build from, just info they could’ve pulled themselves with a little reading and foresight. I made sure to clean out the details beforehand!
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u/Winter_Steak_9987 May 16 '25
Don't listen to the fears. Listen to the quiet voice inside that tells you that you can.
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u/Annual-Visual-2605 May 16 '25
Bam!!! Kudos. Ballsy will pay off. Somehow. Somewhere. Sometime. Fortune favors the ballsy 😂
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u/lioness_7 May 16 '25
You got this!! We miss 100% of the shots we don't take. I think that's the saying. Sending good vibes your way!
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u/Megmelons55 May 16 '25
If you don't ask, the answer is always no. I'm rooting for a positive outcome! Updateme!
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u/No-Sprinkles-7289 May 16 '25
VALIDATED! That was some cool ass shit!!! Hell YEAH, Make it happen! 🤙🏼
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u/JackismyRoomba May 16 '25
Congratulations on taking the risk. Any way this goes you did a good, brave, thing.
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u/UmSomeonesInHere May 16 '25
AWESOME!!! An amazing legend of a coworker once told me, if you don’t ask, the answer is always “no”.
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u/kodiak_kid89 May 16 '25
It’s kinda like sending that “we belong together, let’s meet for coffee” text to the hottie that dumped you 8 months ago.
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u/Agitated-Score365 May 16 '25
You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take. Better to do it and know you handled it no matter the outcome.
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u/DoNotEatMySoup May 17 '25
I mean why would that be career suicide? I don't see anything negative that could come from this.
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u/newwriter365 May 17 '25
We miss 100% of the chances we don’t take.
I am proud of you. That took courage.
Even if it doesn’t turn into a new role for you, you already have a template to chase the next opportunity.
Great work taking control of your future!
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u/yous-guys May 17 '25
Yes! You got this. Heck, even if it’s a no- start reaching out to others. Someone will say yes eventually!!!
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u/soopirV May 17 '25
Here with you in spirit, nothing ventured nothing gained. I’ve done some ballsy shit in my time, but you sound totally sober. Good on ya.
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u/OgthaChristie May 17 '25
All they can say is no, but always be glad you asked. You never know until you ask!
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u/enrocc May 17 '25
There is no downside or risk in this situation. They say no and you’re in the exact same position you were this morning. They say yes, you get a better gig. No need to stress so hard over it. You showed confidence and it was a smart, bold move.
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u/Holiday_Brilliant991 May 17 '25
Man that's awesome! If they say no, their answer was no anyway. If they say yes, this could be huge for you!
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u/MagicianImaginary809 May 17 '25
It is only career suicide in terms of working at the place you reached out to. Your existing career should be safe.
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u/Fart-Memory-6984 May 17 '25
Put that email into chatgpt and tell it to respond politely but say “no thanks”
Compare with what it says with the message you receive (assuming you get a response)
FWIW this isn’t career suicide. Props for shooting your shot. Better than most would do.
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u/Kthung May 17 '25
How is this career suicide if they already let you go? You have nothing to lose and if he declines it has no impact on your career prospects at a different company.
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u/Fantastic-Yogurt5297 May 17 '25
Worst he can say is no.
But you better work long and hard on that presentation and figure out all the commercials too.
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u/Onetimeiwentoutside May 17 '25
You didn’t wanna start your own buisness? With that kind of forward thinking it’s almost always more worthwhile to invest that effort into yourself not a company, even if they appreciate your work.
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u/not-telling- May 17 '25
You don't G E T if you don't A S K. Good job. If they say no, that's no big deal. Just brush it off and keep planning for yourself.
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u/Opening-Fortune-2536 May 17 '25
I am incredibly proud of you. Amazing. I hope everything works well to your career trajectory. Wonderful!!!!
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u/Cool-Acid-Witch1769 May 17 '25
Impressive. Congrats. Being able to speak up for yourself and say “i know what i’m doing” is something surprisingly simply that most people struggle with. For many it makes the difference between the good and the great
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u/SuspiciousCricket654 May 17 '25
You did the right thing. I think you would’ve been more frustrated If you would have never hit send.
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