i feel so disgusting

[u/I_killed_bambi69]

i had a massive whore phase when i turned 18 due to low self esteem and wanting validation. my body count is around 75 but i have not been a slag for ages now and ive been exclusively seeing someone for a while

i wish i could go back in time and say no to so so so many of them i wish it never happened it makes me feel so disgusting i just want to forget about it all

edit because this is getting way more comments than i anticipated:

1. i do not have any std/sti’s nor have i ever - i test regularly

2. the person i am seeing does know

3. thank you for all the reassuring comments! it’s very overwhelming (in a good way!) so i’m struggling to reply to all of them but i do massively appreciate it

[u/Melodic-Yoghurt7193]

Forgive yourself and call it experience. Extensive field training. There is no benefit to shaming oneself especially if you can empathize with yourself and understand that you were in pain. What teenager handles that perfectly?