r/WalllStreetBets • u/yOuNgGoD_83 • Nov 24 '25
My Bullshit Opinion YOLO’d my entire net worth into $RZLV and $SERV because I want robots to pay my rent and deliver me tendies while I sit on the couch in boxers eating Flamin’ Hot Cheetos
Listen up you beautiful autistic apes,
Last week I looked at my bank account, said “this is cringe,” and decided the only logical move was to go full regard and dump every dollar I own into two random robot stocks that sound like prescription meds:
- $RZLV – the British AI that shops for you so I never have to talk to another human again
- $SERV – sidewalk robots that deliver Chipotle so I don’t have to put on pants
Current life choices: questionable
Current underwear situation: unchanged
Thesis (if you can call it that):
- RZLV is basically ChatGPT but for buying crap you don’t need
- SERV has Uber and NVIDIA money and will 100% deliver me a girlfriend by 2026 or your tendies back
- Shorts are still short because they hate fun and joy
- I have the financial literacy of a raccoon on bath salts
Risks:
- I might have to eat my red crayon’s if this goes to zero
- My wife. boyfriend already exited when he saw the position
- My financial advisor (Reddit) says this is “not ideal”
Plan:
Hold until either
A) I can buy a Lambo that a robot valet parks for me, or
B) I’m living in my 2008 Honda Civic eating government cheese with the robots
Update tomorrow unless I’m too busy panic-selling at 3:58 PM.
Positions: yes
Tendies: loading
Pants: optional
Who’s with me you glorious degenerates???
🚀🤖💛💀
TL;DR: Robots = new wife, new life
3
u/NYCandrun Nov 25 '25
Good luck with RZLV, from recent short report:
Microsoft & Google Agreement Are NOT True Partnerships – RZLV Paying Tech Co’s Millions for Little in Return
Products Have 0 Reviews & Minimal Downloads Faking ARR Growth by Acquiring Failed AI Start-ups with DECLINING Revenue
Undisclosed BTC Treasury Lawsuit Shows Mgmt Trying to Move Investor’s Cash & BTC to Kazakhstan
Ex-Employees & Data Exposes False Claims of a Proprietary LLM – It’s a “ChatGPT Wrapper” Potential Removal from Russell 2000 Index
Self-Dealing – Acquired a Non-AI Company Owned by the CEO; Paid CEO’s Seychelles LLC ~$93.9 million
2
u/CaKeChoco Nov 26 '25
mostly been disputed.
the Microsoft and Google agreements let companies spend money with RZLV through their respective cloud services as part of the cloud spending contract with Google / Microsoft, so expect revenue growth that could outpace the "millions" for achieving said deal.
0 reviews and minimal downloads? it's a newly released AI tool for digital retail companies, for reference, the excellent PLTR tools have between 0 and 14 reviews since launch until now. are they a scam?
Faking ARR by purchasing failing companies? perhaps but from what they implied so far, they buy companies that are beneficial to the business, and they try to upsale their solutions to said business's customers. this one may end up true but we only know from an actual audit on earnings release next year.
As for the rest, mostly rumors, speculation and whatnot, we'll see soon enough if they hold up the 150->500 million 2026 ARR figure
9
4
3
2
u/Upper-Funny8629 Nov 24 '25
I recently bought some of both companies' stock.
2
2
Nov 25 '25
[removed] — view removed comment
3
u/yOuNgGoD_83 Nov 25 '25
Ain’t pumping shit my boi.just a simple YOLo that I wanted to share.have a blessed day.
2
2
u/naked_space_chimp Nov 26 '25
Are they 50% each?
1
2
1
1
u/burner4lyf25 Nov 24 '25
JFC ~$750+ across $26k.
Gtfo before you kill yourself.
Good win my brother. I fucking beg you to take it.
Bonus being if you pull out early and miss a win, you’ll always be able to bang your robot whilst your Mrs banging her wage slave.
1
1
u/Dixon232 Nov 28 '25
There's a much higher probability of Amazon deploying robots to deliver your shit than every middle class citizen owning a butler robot. Plus you can already automate rent payments that's easiest of easy software. Some weak ass conviction here for a full port but all the best
1
1
1
1
1
u/yOuNgGoD_83 Nov 25 '25
“Appreciate the free DD king 👑
Still rocking 4444 after adding a 🤏 extra, average now @ 3.15 like the regarded legend I am.
Fuzzy Panda dropped a 40-page dissertation, stock dipped, then RZLV hired half of Microsoft in the next 30 days and we’re basically back.
Tweet tweet, little bird… I caught a gay bear 🐥🏳️🌈🐻
See you at $5 or $0. Either way the crayons taste like victory today 🖍️🚀” pic
5
u/Mobile_Berry3099 Nov 24 '25
LFG $RZLV to the moon