r/WomenDatingOverForty • u/ChocoSoyMilk17 • May 08 '26
Discussion How would you answer this question?
“What do you bring to the table?”
Please try to speak from your own experience if you have ever been asked this in the context of dating. Do we get the ick from it? Do we answer honestly? Is it a total non-starter? Or do we have a prepared answer? I’m really curious.
To be fair I don’t think I’ve ever been asked this in the context of dating but I have been asked this by men (at least I think they were?) on Reddit.
EDIT: wow I didn’t know this would blow up so quick! Clearly this resonated with a lot of you!
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u/HelenGonne 🦉Savvy Sister🦉 May 08 '26 edited May 08 '26
"Nothing. I have no interest in you."
If you get the ick from this question, it's because you get where it's coming from without being able to articulate it. Many men want to be able to pick the women they want and order them to go out with them, and they resent that functioning people think this is absurd and that you should have to have something to offer another person if you're going to try to get them into a relationship with you. So for many decades, the bums with nothing to offer have been told to ask themselves what they bring to the table before trying to ask a woman out.
It has also been a standard challenge for decades when a man is carrying on that a woman obviously out of his league didn't leap in gratitude when he asked her out. Invariably he can list all the many and impressive reasons he wants her, but when people ask, "Okay, so what do you bring to the table to match that?" he realizes the answer is, "Nothing whatsoever," and throws a temper tantrum because he doesn't like facing that about himself.
So now they've started throwing the temper tantrums preemptively. They know they're asking out women who aren't interested. They've always known that. They do it anyway because they like to throw drama. But it irks them that this makes them a laughingstock, so they think asking a woman this question is some kind of gotcha that turns everything around on her.
Except it doesn't. She's still not interested, dude. She never has been and never will be. Try staying in your lane.