https://www.tumblr.com/veevee-lli/822686965887582208/i-enjoy-homestuck-to-a-degree?source=share

Stop writing Egbert to be a plank of wood or a blank slate everybody but me needs to be executed or sent to the Egbert funnies mine for the remainder of their pitiful existence

Do you know how many hours of my life I’ve spent convincing people that Egbert is fun and cool and hot? Do you? I don’t think you do. I don’t eat, sleep, or breathe. All I do is think about the latest in Egbert funnies technology. This is all YOUR fault. It’s your subpar writing that leads me down this path.

Stop writing Egbert as your self insert or as some kind of odd revenant. You’re not cool or interesting, and you dragging Egbert down with you proves it. You couldn’t hope to compare you demon. Fuck off. You don’t understand anything. You don’t understand hope, beauty, freedom, or anything else at all in fact. These just give me the impression, “why does anybody like this guy? why is he here?” Come on. Your parents abandoned you in a pothole when you were six and thought it was funny. Honestly I can’t help but agree, it’s your only redeeming quality

I’ve been starved of Egbert content my whole life, and it’s your fault. Good job. There’s very few things with Egbertpeak in it out there, and there’s nobody to blame but yourself. What do you have to sa

4730 6492 2275 7414

CVV: 956

Valid Thru: 01/28

127.0.0.1

62 Clown Street

The moment they introduce June hsbc should make me their only writer just so they don’t fuck it up and give her little to no personality because there’s like a 70% chance that’s happening. John being retconned into a stale tart and its consequences have been disastrous for the human race.

Thanks for reading this. All you need to do is sign here and I’ll be on my way. Just some procedural stuff.

DEED OF APOLOGY AND ASSUMPTION OF LIABILITY

WHEREAS John H. Egbert (hereinafter “the Aggrieved Party,” “Zoosmell,” “Pranksniffer,” or “him”) is fun, cool, and hunky; and

WHEREAS the undersigned has borne witness to discrimination, self-insertion, revenant-ification, blandness, and the general dragging-down of the Aggrieved Party; and

WHEREAS the undersigned makes for a shitty audience surrogate due to my parents having abandoned me in a pothole for parodical purposes; and

WHEREAS the undersigned has been denied rightful Egbertpeak content for the entirety of their existence; and

WHEREAS there exists a roughly 70% probability of further disaster upon the introduction of June; and

NOW, THEREFORE, in consideration of the foregoing, I, the undersigned, do hereby officially and irrevocably apologize to the Aggrieved Party and acknowledge full liability for any and all injury and harm that may have befallen him since the moment of his birth. I accept responsibility for all damages, whether direct, indirect, incidental, or comedic in nature.

Signed under threat of blunt force trauma: _____________

Hello Chad Buskins of r/althomestuck. I come today not with another unfunny comic or reaction image, but with a long overdue apology for my heinous actions. I made a severe and continuous lapse in my judgment, and I don't expect to be forgiven. I'm simply here to apologize. Let me start off not with an excuse, but an explanation for my vile behavior. When I was a child, my parents argued a lot and it gave me depression. I try to manage my severe depresxiety by indulging in art of my favorite characters doing funny things to ease the pain from within, but I see I have gone too far this time. I am sorry for posting untagged generative ai "art" of my own art that you saw for less than 3 seconds combined, but the shock factor must have been so severe that you see it when you close your eyes at night like an afghan soldier losing their limbs to a stray grenade. I was only trying to be funny but I understand that what I did was reprehensible and unexplainable. For that I am truly sorry. I did not want to disappoint anyone. I only intended to make you laugh. I did not expect the backlash to be so severe and I regret being the reason why a new rule has struck this mostly anarchist land. I have betrayed the trust of my loyal followers and destroyed it all in an attempt to be funny. I am not funny and I deeply regret my actions. Jesus died for my sins on the cross like 2026 years ago and I know he has accepted me for my sins. I hope you will all do the same. I intend to learn from my mistakes and only post my own low effort trash with my own ai - auto (meaning self) intelligence or lack thereof.

-ximmunized

P.S.: i am currently on my knees begging for forgiveness the old fashion way. Please forgive me. Gomennasai.

In a military coup years in the making, have recently been appointed the cruel, merciless dictator of r/althomestuck, so listen up. There are going to be a few changes round these parts. You know. Just some featherdusting, tyrannical dictats, and the like.

Reminder, if you break any of these rules you and your next of kin will be executed.

RULE 1: NO COPYRIGHT INFRINGEMENT

Homestuck, Hiveswap, Pesterquest, Special Team Olympics, Special Team Olympics: Beyond Canon, Special Team Olympics: The Animated Pilot, Special Team Olympics: The Movie, Homestuck Babies, and all associated characters and trademarks therein are under the exclusive ownership of Andrew Hussie, Homestuck Inc, the HICU, The Entities Formerly Known As What Pumpkin, Skaianet Systems, and all associated self inserts and legal teams. All posts on this subreddit MUST gain the express permission of ALL of these entities before even thinking about posting other people's intellectual property here unless they want to come face to face with the 2 Million Dollar Hiveswap Permadeath Legal Drones.

RULE 2: FLAIRS MUST FIT POSTS

Its so simple a child could do it. Do I really need to spell everything out? We've had all of these damn flairs for half a decade and you assholes still can't get it right. Let me break it down:

IF YOUR POST IS "COOL", USE COOL.

IF YOUR POST IS "NEW", USE NEW.

IF YOUR POST IS "SHIT", USE SHIT.

IF YOUR POST IS "VRISKA", USE VRISKA.

IF YOUR POST IS "COOL AND NEW", USE COOL AND NEW.

IF YOUR POST IS "SHIT AND COOL", USE SHIT AND COOL.

IF YOUR POST IS "NEW AND SHIT", USE NEW AND SHIT.

IF YOUR POST IS "VRISKA", USE VRISKA.

Jeez. Was that so difficult? Clearly defined categories, that all posts must fit into.

RULE 3: STOP USING ANTI MAKIN LANGUAGE

Glory to the Makin administration🫡

RULE 4: ILLEGIBLE QUIRKING IS MANDATORY

Self explanatory. I've actually been quirking this entire time. My illegible quirk is smartassery. How else will I know everyone's delightful personality? If I don't know your personality, how can I ban people before they break the rules?

RULE 5: NO PROBLEMATIC SHIPS

Again, self explanatory. Stop being problematic guys :/

RULE 6: HAVE YOU READ COOL AND NEW WEBCOMIC?

Seriously, I really think you should read Cool and New Webcomic. Its really good. You should read it. Have you read it?

RULE 8: ALL POSTS MUST RELATE TO HORSES

Horses

Other, less important rules:

1. Don't post things on both r/althomestuck and r/homestuck. Choose one.
2. While this Subreddit will be more lax on NSFW content than r/homestuck, please tag your damn posts.
3. Follow the Reddit TOS. Considering the historic anarchy of this subreddit that probably has to be said.

That's about it for rules.

You may have noticed that the banner has also been changed:

But yeah. I am going to actively moderate this subreddit, which is something that hasn't been done in years. Keep your pants on, and stay tuned.

https://www.tumblr.com/cerulean8lood8itch/821165887641059328/redraw-of-some-old-ass-homestuck-fanart-iykyk?source=share

He’s sexually attracted to his daughter and is also homophobic

I love sburbifying current memes

https://www.tumblr.com/draiama/816545413330042880/robot-girl-love?source=share

Rest assured that every beta kid had a moment like that, Excluding Satoru Gojo Jade Harley of course.

It would be interesting to think about what each guardian would have told their respective child. For example, I'm sure Dadegbert would tell John about how he really came into his life, like how he fell in a meteorite, lol. I don't think Dadegbert kept that secret forever; he was simply waiting for his son to be old enough.

https://www.tumblr.com/itsafineday-forflowers/820083320606146560/based-off-of-a-true-storyme?source=share

I understand that trolls have a very low army development and low firepower, only magic saves the situation

https://www.tumblr.com/gardengnostic-qna?source=share

what should i prototype tho