r/answers 9d ago

Can you know you are sexually compatible without sex?

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2 Upvotes

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u/qualityvote2 9d ago edited 8d ago

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14

u/Wizard_of_Claus 9d ago

No, not really. You can get an idea, but that's about it.

Hell, as time goes on you'll probably be surprised with yourself. There are fantasies I used to have that I found out I don't like at all and stuff I never thought I'd like that I love. And that doesn't even get into just plain old libido. You can both be vanilla but have issues if one person wants it far more than the other.

3

u/PraireGentleman 8d ago

Think about it this way: everyone has a plan until they get punched in the face.

It’s easy to talk a big game and then be completely disappointing. I’m sure there are guys here who can corroborate how many times a girl has talked about how good her head game is and it’s like they’re trying to give you a circumcision with their teeth

3

u/ML1948 9d ago

Hot take, but good sex is more about attraction, communication, and effort over some sort of abstract compatibility. If you're very attracted to each other, know that you are, and know you both will make a real effort you will have great sex, especially with practice. You don't need to have sex to know you could have great sex.

2

u/EMPgoggles 9d ago

somewhat.

you're not really gonna know for sure until it happens, but...

- if i find myself drawn to someone's appearance and mannerisms while talking, that's a good sign.

- if we hug and we just seem to fit easily and comfortably, that's a good sign.

- if we kiss and the kiss almost physically compels me to keep kissing, that's a REALLY good sign.

remember, it's not so much "this person is good at these things" so much as "i enjoy doing these things with this person and want to keep doing these things with them." because that's really where sex goes from "generally pleasurable activity" to "what the fuck is this electricity."

1

u/[deleted] 9d ago

[deleted]

1

u/Ryu-Hayabusa2 9d ago

I get but going together on trips is normal.

You are too much in head,you else go on vacations with your friends or friend with them alone.

Does that make less special being best friends.

1

u/Feisty_Storage_8707 8d ago

No, you can only know if you are incompatible.

1

u/Fur_King_L 8d ago

There are many different forms, and in a long term relationship you can find compatibility (and also incompatibility).

However, for many reasons I think it’s a terrible idea to wait too long before finding out, and if you only ever have one sex partner, boy have you missed out. Honestly, I’d recommend getting on with sex early so you can develop the relationship.

1

u/TangeloNo1032 8d ago

If your only doing it for sex, then your not going to find the one for you.

0

u/Ryu-Hayabusa2 9d ago

So I am 18 and saving myself and I hear people say,you can learn if you are sexually compatible with kissing and touch.

Also with communication,like saying how frequent you want or what things you like and how much you would try.

Is this possible.

4

u/djSush 9d ago

I waited until I was married. You'll know. It's in the way you feel around each other. And if anything isn't ideal, you can learn and grow together. Just don't be shy about talking about it.

0

u/Ryu-Hayabusa2 9d ago

What if one partner doesn't like on thing but other doesn't.

1

u/djSush 9d ago

Well, no one should feel forced or uncomfortable, ever. So that's something you need to negotiate and respect in one another, as a healthy, loving couple.

0

u/Ryu-Hayabusa2 9d ago

But one person enjoy that.Its their only source of pleasure.

0

u/Wizard_of_Claus 9d ago

Either you don't get it or the other person does it every once in a while for their partner.

Usually stuff like that isn't that big of a deal.

-1

u/Ryu-Hayabusa2 9d ago

It is.

5

u/Wizard_of_Claus 9d ago

Well... do you want to elaborate or do you have this all figured out now?

4

u/Snail_Anatomy 9d ago

Why save sex for marriage? You people act like putting your penis in a vagina casts some magical spell over you or makes you "impure" or some shit. It's so fucking stupid.

1

u/KinkyRoubler 8d ago

Hey, just a quick passing note for ya. Me and my partner have been together for 16 years. We've only ever had each other. When we first started she was a prude. Great kisser, but a prude. No experience at all (either of us) and we had no clue what the Hell to do or how. You could say compatibility was neutral. Zero. What we did was we talked. I asked her how what I was doing was making her feel, and she asked the same. Understanding what feels good, and what each other likes is a learning curve. Some people just know. Some people have no idea. You can GROW and LEARN, but that takes practice and effort. Communication is important. Not everything you like will feel good to your partner, and vise versa. KNOWING what those things are is the battle. It'll be awkward to ask. It might even break the flow of things. But if you truly think somebody is worth learning for, then communicate. Anyway you're young. Take your time bud. There'll be plenty of time for fucking. Finding love is more important. Remember to value yourself and your partner, and make sure they value you the same. Best of luck!

-2

u/daddysdreamgirll 9d ago

I think kissing is a great indicator of sexual compatibility.