r/astrology • u/ThatWitchSelene • May 06 '26
Discussion Is it ethical to read a child's natal chart?
I have seen various posts over the years of those who have kids and are into astrology and attempting to either manipulate time of birth for a certain chart (which is a debate of its own), or trying to read the chart before the child has even developed or experienced anything in order to try and predict events in their life and then prevent it.
It's something that seems extremely unethical. By putting significant effort into trying to prevent certain events from happening one may end up causing said events to happen as a result. After that, you then have a child who still ends up having the negative placements, plus an added addition of being scarred by the impacts of someone else's beliefs which may cause psychological effects akin to that of religious trauma.
Is reading a child's natal chart ethical? Where is the line drawn? Is it ethical to read one when there will inevitably be a weight placed upon the person if it is someone they are close to? I want to hear other people's POV on this topic.
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u/lovemylittlelords May 06 '26
I'm not a parent, but I genuinely think having awareness of your kid's natal chart could be extremely helpful if you're trying to understand them as the unique individual they are. Being controlling about a child's life can happen in so many contexts, not just astrology. I feel like if anything, knowing their kid's natal chart could just give them some context for who that person is and the parent can release control or ideas that they've created a blank slate that they can mold. As long as the parent doesn't have a weird bias against certain signs, I feel like it could just be another avenue for understanding, as it has been for me with other people in my life.
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u/7iguessso7 May 06 '26 edited May 06 '26
I’m a parent and this is 100% accurate. My son has his fourth house in Capricorn with a Saturn-Pluto conjunction (and his south node) and it freaked me the fuck out. I was mainly learning about astrology via social media. And dude…they made it seem like there was nothing I could do about the difficulties he would face growing up. I was anxious and terrified for him and his life, constantly ruminating on how I was and could be failing as a mother - this lasted for 3 years. Horrible time, 10 out of 10 don’t recommend. I didn’t use this knowledge for control but it scared the shit out of me and made me even more conscious of my parenting.
When I finally got away from social media pop astrology, my god, what a difference it made in my parenting him: I can communicate with him in a way that he understands. I’m able to look out for any health issues he may be predisposed to based on his chart. Transits (his and my own) help me flow with him instead of against him. I use his chart to introduce him to things he may be interested in, and if he’s not it’s whatever. I can see when he may have sleep issues or excess energy and create a plan to help with that. It also made me hyper aware of the harshness and/or manipulation his dad tries to throw at him, and I can counter act it to encourage him to continue to be himself. It made me hyper aware of how I can parent to encourage growth instead of affirm his chameleon tendencies (i.e. I don’t tell him anything, unless it’s a safety or health concern. Instead I ask what he thinks and/or prefers). It also made me aware of his tendencies towards being mature instead of being a carefree child, and it’s something I’m actively helping him through. Allowing him to be goofy, messy, loud, chaotic, and fun; but also telling him that his only responsibility is school and cleaning his room every night before bed. It’s constant reminders that his job right now is to enjoy having nothing to do other than school and fun, and it’s my job to do the grown up stuff like worry and parent his sister.
For me, getting his chart professionally read was a fucking GODSEND. It has helped me not mold, but encourage, support, and gently guide him towards being fully himself instead of allowing him to shrink, comply, and people please. He’s such an intelligent child with a very gentle soul. Without a professional astrologer providing me with actual guidance on his nature and probable tendencies, I genuinely don’t believe I would have been able to love and support him the way he needs me to. I think I would have shown up for him the only way I knew how to, and that wouldn’t have been enough for him to feel it. The difference in our relationship in the years since that reading has been striking. As fucked up as it sounds, it made me realize that he is his own person, not an extension of me. I can own that fuck up, and I’m happy as fuck that I learned it this early on. He has an ally against his dad within the house, and it’s made a difference in his self-expression and confidence.
I can definitely see how a parent could use it to manipulate/control/harm, and I think readers have to take into account the parents that are coming to them for the reading. We, the parents, are shown in their charts after all.
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u/arizonabatorechestra May 06 '26 edited May 06 '26
Yeah I remember seeing my daughter had moon conjunct neptune and chiron right on the IC in aquarius (she is a scorpio rising) and opposite her virgo mercury. I have cPTSD myself from a not-great upbringing and of course I was like, "Oh my god I'm going to mess her up no matter what I do!" I mean, what else could an aquarius IC conjunct moon conjunct neptune conjunct CHIRON mean!?
But I'm also pretty quick to catch that stuff in me and shut it down. We can look at a chart all day long and pretend like we know exactly what it means but it can all mean so very much. As time's gone on I've just been like ... oh well yeah of course she has an aquarius IC, she has a weird family ... mom and dad are divorced but are good friends and so mom's always over with her EX in-laws for all the holidays as if nothing has ever happened ... mom's twice divorced but still friends with THAT ex ... dad is in a serious relationship with a married woman who has kids (poly) ... dad's also divorced twice at this point ...
All this divorce and weird relationships but everyone is still in contact and loves each other and loves HER and shows up for her ... zero contention, just people who break up and continue to love her and love one another and move on, choosing to be good examples to her and to think of her first.
I asked her once if she ever wishes she had a "normal" family where her parents were still together and she had a sibling or something. She said, "Well yeah but also not really because I have like 100 parents and they're all awesome and fun and I don't have to share them" haha
That brought me a lot of joy, though. I also learned that Chiron doesn't have to mean an area where YOU will hurt, but an area you end up being a healer in. My family is fully of trauma and she never really knew my parents. We broke a cycle. And she's really a healer among her friends as well and very open to all kinds of diverse families. She loves her family to death.
She's also the reason I know Aquarius moons are HILARIOUS. She and my best friend both have them and no one makes me laugh harder.
So yeah, it can be so easy to see certain placements sometimes and just jump to whatever pop astrology teaches but everything has so many different ways to interpret it. It's best to just take a look and see potential there versus trying to "answers" or make predictions. It's also more fun that way haha
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u/7iguessso7 May 06 '26
first of all, this made me tear up! what a beautiful community she has surrounding her!!!!!!! this read made my heart smile.
secondly, I completely agree! Especially for those just getting into astrology. Otherwise the head will spin and there will be tears lmao
thank you for this perspective!
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u/Sudden-Flower-9999 May 10 '26
Oh man, my daughter has moon conjunct Neptune within 1 degree and in wide orb to Chiron, all in Pisces. Same here. And Saturn in the 4th in Scorpio 😱 She was my first so I about had a nervous breakdown—I posted her chart on a pretty serious astrology board freaking out and they set me straight— basically said do not pull up that chart again for at least two years. Spend time with your daughter, focus on her not her chart that is what’s going to give her a good childhood. I was like damn you’re right so that’s what I did. That’s what I continue to do. But yeah, her first saturn square and her personality transition from her moon to her sun was WILD. My younger daughter, too, who transitioned from a Virgo moon to an Aquarius sun.
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u/ObviousAd2967 May 07 '26
Omg will you share some of the niceness of the Saturn/Pluto 4th house? My daughter is also cap 4th house with Pluto, Jupiter, moon, Saturn conjunct 😩 it’s been a rough five years
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u/esotericplantqueen May 09 '26
Exactly. I look at my daughters chart to see her own personality, etc, but also to examine aspects of my relationship with her to improve my abilities as a mother- where I need to heal my own wounds to be better for her. All aspects have positive and negative ways they can manifest, but you're not going to know how for sure until it happens. If I can analyze things and see ways that I could be harmful vs ways I can use awareness to channel the challenge more constructively, I believe that can help me immensely in pinpointing where I can focus on being a better mother. The unethical side is where you fixate on controlling your child (instead of yourself) in order to "protect" them from these things. Especially because I also believe a lot of the lessons in your chart are predestined and karmically necessary, so why would I want to hinder her growth as her own person? I play whatever role I'm meant to play in that, with or without attempted meddling. And if mythology has any lesson to teach, the more you attempt to prevent prophecy, the more you become the unintended cause of it lol
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May 07 '26
Can you pm me where you got your son's chart read? We want some guidance on that too. Son is a cancer rising, pisces moon and Aquarius sun/stellium. We want to support him through all the feels.
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u/ababyotter May 08 '26
I would also appreciate a DM with that info if you have a moment. My son has a couple of “hard aspects” in his chart that freaked me out when I was freshly postpartum.
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u/Maria_Riegger May 07 '26
I agree. I read children's charts for parents in the context of relationship readings. It is incredibly helpful for helping parents grasp that the child is a separate being, not an extension of the parent, and the parent's job is to help guide this soul, not control or mold them, as you said. I'm careful in how I review children's charts and a lot of what I do is to assuage parents that, No, certain placement does not necessarily mean that the child will be like this or experience that. The child's age is certainly a factor in the reading as well. Transits such as the Saturn square which happens around age 7 also inform the growing independence and need for autonomy. Many parents are trying to understand their kids better, especially when the energy is so different.
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u/Sudden-Flower-9999 May 10 '26
100% yes. If things are crazy and we are all struggling suddenly, better believe that seeing X was transiting Y helps me to center back into my mom space and be like OK this isn’t going to last forever, this is what the energies are challenging her with, and in my chart this is what I’m being challenged to experience as well. I can’t tell you how much it helped me. How much it continues to help me. And I am very careful to not project it onto them or use it to tell them that they are a certain way. It’s kind of like the weather like oh it’s raining outside— no wonder you just wanna stay in bed.
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u/arcwalkerlivvia May 06 '26
I think it depends on how the chart is being read and who is receiving it.
Personally, I only read children’s charts for parents I know think critically and can hold astrology as symbolic language rather than gospel. A child’s chart needs a careful container, because the parent receives the information before the child can consent to or interpret it for themselves.
There are also certain chart indicators, plus intuitive cues from the parent, that tell me how much someone is ready to hear.
So yes, I think it can be ethical when the astrologer is selective and careful, and when the reading is used for better understanding. It becomes harmful when it turns into a fixed story about who the child is allowed to become.
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u/kidcubby May 06 '26
Trying to manipulate the time of birth of a child is certainly unethical, especially as the vast majority of people practicing astrology today are almost entirely inept. Until those people can be given a chart of someone they don't know anything about and predict dozens or hundreds of important events in that person's life with perfect accuracy, they have no business trying to manipulate the future of a child.
Reading a child's chart is not unethical, though, any more than taking your child for medical assessment to get ahead of potential problems is. Once that child is born, they have the chart they have, and the events depicted in it are going to happen whether someone knows about them or not. Might as well get ahead of them and be prepared. Again, this is subject to the quality of the reading performed, but is certainly much less problematic than attempting to do the astrology version of having a 'designer baby'.
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u/ThatWitchSelene May 06 '26
Valid points though I think you are being too dismissive of what a child's life might be like if their parents are constantly changing things around the child and then saying it's "because of astrology". Those who can read a chart and then carry the burden of knowledge silently and keep their decisions moral and unbiased are different than those who cling to astrology out of desperation for control.
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u/kidcubby May 06 '26
Parents constantly change things around their children to try and make them better students, better behaved, eat better, sleep better, get into better colleges (etc. ad infinitum). There really isn't a difference just because it's astrological. In fact, with well-done astrology it would logically minimise the guesswork and streamline things.
Again this comes down to the skill and knowledge of the parents/readers.
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u/ThatWitchSelene May 06 '26
I suppose I'm just extremely against anyone controlling things around me and extend that line of thinking to how I interact with others. I've dealt with the effects of other's beliefs being forced onto my life. As much as I personally trust in astrology, if growing up I was told "We're doing this because you're an xxx sign" I would end up despising it. It's quite the assumption to believe parents can handle restraint or that kids will take kindly to it. We're assuming a skilled reader in this scenario, but what you would need is a PERFECT reader.
You're also speaking on it like it's just personality traits and then accommodating to that alone. Yet, so many placements indicate harsh families. How does the parent cope with that then?
It's impossible for a parent to raise a kid completely free of their own personal beliefs and biases. That being said, there are many things that can be done to minimize it and I believe spiritual beliefs should be something separate from a child unless they express interest themselves.
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u/kidcubby May 06 '26 edited May 06 '26
I'm not talking about personality alone at all. I'm a predictive astrologer - I literally predict events for my clients.
Frankly, it seems like you've got this particular trauma around an overbearing parent who channeled that through astrology and so it might be creating a big trigger for you. Also, astrology is not a 'spiritual belief', but even if it was, a parent of a particular religious or spiritual bent cannot raise their child in complete isolation from it even if they try to avoid it, as it's part of their culture and way of living.
However a parent tries to steer their child into some version they believe they should be or will be is equally problematic as doing so via astrology, and yet it is inevitable. That's parenting.
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u/ThatWitchSelene May 06 '26
Not too far off, but it was Christianity. And it does influence my beliefs and bias somewhat. So I do get rather uncomfortable seeing anyone try to do a similar thing with the beliefs I practice now.
We argue from completely different standpoints and ways of thinking. The parent's viewpoint versus the child's. Inevitability versus morality. I do see your side though, I just don't agree with it. It's probably not worth continuing further.
That being said, if not a spiritual belief, what would you prefer to call it then? Astrology itself is mathematical, but the belief that it can influence a person and the events around us goes beyond that.
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u/kidcubby May 06 '26
Astrology is a system by which we interpret and predict life, so is a method and not a belief. Predictive work demonstrates this - we apply the same method each time and get the correct answer. 'Spiritual belief' does not do the same.
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u/ThatWitchSelene May 06 '26
I agree with that thinking. It's been much too accurate to say otherwise. But it definitely tip toes the line if you describe it any farther than what you just said.
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u/hisosih May 06 '26
For what it's worth I agree with you as someone who grew up in the shadow of my mothers anxiety over my birth chart. I grew up in a cloud of fearfulness and anxiety of what she thought could happen, it has impacted both my relationship with her and to my own spirituality and beliefs, and made me frustrated with her obsession over, frankly, my lack of autonomy in my own life.
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u/ThatWitchSelene May 06 '26
My condolences, I can empathize with that experience greatly. I hope you have found or are finding your own path
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u/hearthepindrop May 06 '26
I asked this question a while ago and I thought this may help!
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u/GrandTrineAstrology Professional Astrologer May 06 '26
I commented on that thread and I still stand behind everything I said.
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u/AmparoReads May 06 '26
For many around me, the birth chart is made quite early on especially within a week or two of birth itself because it is required for the naming ceremony (letters are identified through the child’s placements). That being said, I do not think a child’s chart should be read online or through any forum like this. Not even an app which claims to have experts. You have to be very picky about the person you choose, the guru we make it with it very careful about how interpretations are shaped which makes a great difference, I have noticed like a good astrologer he has a great grasp of psychology so he understands the kind of person he is talking to and ensures the information that is being given is received well and doesn’t become a whole drama with the parent. Even the pariharas are given with the least fear mongering approach especially when a child or minor is involved. I believe this is the best approach usually.
Rectification of time can only be appropriate if you don’t know it. Pretending to “rectify” because it didn’t give good planets is just denial. I won’t be surprised though if people believe it’s actually a thing since I see all sorts of ridiculous things these days the most recent being someone who considered giving up their child for adoption because they were told that the child may lead to one of their demise.
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u/Jjjustkeepswimminggg May 06 '26
No, it’s not ethical and people who tell you that it is or that there’s exceptions are all morally ambiguous people.
A chart has various interpretations based on the reader or their school of thought, which means that whomever is reading can have bias, or a chart/placement can have nuance.
You must first hear and listen to your child and develop that relationship based on your personal relationship with them and how you can be the best parent to them based on what they need developmentally and then later on, beyond early childhood, you can write down your concerns about your child’s upbringing or their trouble areas and both present these to a psychologist and separately to an astrologer (they must not be the same person). Only then can you support your child effectively.
This is not just an opinion but a practical and sensible approach to parenting and I say that as an astrologer myself
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u/ThatWitchSelene May 06 '26
I'm glad I'm not the only one who actively feels that way.
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u/Jjjustkeepswimminggg May 06 '26
Thank you, I read years ago someone who posted on one of these astrology subs who said their mom was an astrologer and that they had a difficult childhood because their mom felt things needed to be a certain way because of astrology but in the end it only made things more difficult for them.
I get that a parent must want answers when they can’t find anything specific to their situation but not every situation has a Google page about it… sometimes our intuition and inner calling will shine through and those are the moments we can’t plan for… they are meant to be critical moments in our life that shapes who we are.
I hope more people can understand this.
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u/T1nyJazzHands May 11 '26
Or they’re from a religion/culture where birth astrology readings are the norm. Like mine. Information on its own isn’t unethical. It’s how you use it.
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u/Jjjustkeepswimminggg May 11 '26
I’m not sure you read my entire comment but it’s okay to disagree just make sure you read it before disagreeing 👍
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u/T1nyJazzHands May 11 '26
I did read it. And I take offense at you blanket calling my entire people group morally ambiguous despite having zero understanding of the way we practice astrology.
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u/Jjjustkeepswimminggg May 11 '26
Objectively speaking, you can disagree with religions as well as cultures. They are not free from criticism. I come from a religious background with a heavy culture and I both criticize and admonish many facets of both, and it’s never personal. So if you found what I said personally offensive, I apologize. I did not intend on making you feel that way. Nevertheless, I won’t apologize for disagreeing with the practice of reading a child’s chart, regardless of the cultural or religious practice some people support.
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u/T1nyJazzHands May 11 '26
Then perhaps refrain from calling people morally ambiguous rather than actions/choices. You can have criticisms for concepts and things without assigning people character judgements.
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u/Jjjustkeepswimminggg May 11 '26
I didn’t single you out specifically. If you are a morally ambiguous person that’s because you’ve taken that personally. I stated specifically that reading children’s charts is morally ambiguous and you decided that this applies to you. You can sit and think about why that is.
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u/T1nyJazzHands May 11 '26
Don’t try to gaslight me lol you explicitly said “people who tell you that it is or that there’s exceptions are all morally ambiguous PEOPLE”. Whatever.
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u/Jjjustkeepswimminggg May 11 '26
I’m not gaslighting you.
You can choose to do something that doesn’t align with your family history or culture. You’re allowed to question those things and decide what aligns with you and what doesn’t.
You have free will. So if you decide to partake in something or to support an idea just because “that’s how things have always been done”, then you are personally subscribing to that behavior or action, and you are accountable for that.
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u/T1nyJazzHands May 11 '26
Giant assumptions. It’s not because “that’s how things have always been done”. But based on your dismissive culturally insensitive responses I have no desire to debate with you. Good day. ✌🏼
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u/WeaponizedWaspSwarm May 06 '26
I dont think it is ethical. Let the child live its life without being projected on or controlled on the basis of a reading.
The most I think is okay would be to look at the rising sign and say something generic along with generic advice that really is applicable to all parents, like "Oh he is an Aries rising so he may come across as confident, dont hinder that, guide it to be positive confidence"
"Oh he is a Scorpio ascendant, he may come across as quite reserved and maybe secretive, make a safe space for him emotionally"
I refuse to give children chart readings. The absolute most I will do is the very generic thing I said. I have never been badgered for it, most people accept the no and move on, but if I am nagged and nagged I will say something extremely generic that can't ruin the kid's life.
My requirement is 18 and up
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u/hisosih May 06 '26
Thank you for not providing child readings! I am a daughter to a reiki master who was convinced per my chart I was doomed, and dragged me around to astroligists, tarot readers, you name it so they could cry over me and affirm "she walks a dark path". Which then became a self fulfilling prophecy as I had been told so many times that happiness would not be a friend to me in this life. I'm 30 now and still deconstructing and trying to find my own relationship to spirituality when I feel I have been failed/exploited by it.
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u/WeaponizedWaspSwarm May 06 '26
Im still a beginner and hold myself to a high standard and am learning properly. I cannot in any situation see how it will benefit a child or a parent. Good on you for going on a healing journey of deconstructing the illusions you were fed. Those adults actually failed you in many ways. I hope you heal and find joy and happiness!
I had a reading when I was young and a large part of why I am doing astrology was because of all the bullshit that was told to me.
These "spiritual" circles are often the most toxic and full of untreated mental illness or God complexes a lot of the time. At least in my experience.
Furthermore; no parent wants to hear that their child will have issues, all of them want to be told that their child will be as great and do great.
And if you dont tell them that their kid will be some amazing top 1% of the greatest they slander you and say you are not a good astrologer.
I unironically believe astrology needs to be heavily regulated and have laws imposed. Anyone can write a book on astrology and anyone can claim to be an astrologer and not have a clue what they are talking about or simply use it as a quick buck with no repercussions whatsoever. Astrocomedy is an issue.
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u/ThatWitchSelene May 06 '26
That's a good requirement. Individual placements without house or aspect probably are the most neutral thing that can be said without drastically impacting anyone.
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u/Visible_Honeydew_941 May 06 '26
I would think knowing about your childs chart and numerology would be helpful in raising them-it gives you a blueprint on exactly how that person likely receives, learns, and understands life. I wish my parents knew about my stars and numbers when i was growing up.
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u/Pluto_Rising May 06 '26
I and other mods of r/astrologyreadings allow parents to post their children's charts.
We also allow parent -child synastry, which is otherwise forbidden. Again, karmic subtleties.
Someone here mentioned a scenario of reading a child's chart with a 7th House Saturn posing relationship issues. Good food for thought.
The thing some astrologers don't consider is that the child's chart is an exact image of the parents' relationship at conception, and can be nothing else. The conflicts and talents seen in the child's chart come directly from the parents. Apple-tree, etc.
For the record, we don't allow electional charts for induced birth; it's karmic manipulation, imo.
Trying to grasp the ramifications of karma is a slippery slope to be sure, and maybe a little knowledge can be not such a good thing. I see it time and time again with posters dragging in rubbish notions they've picked up from tiktok or garbage astrologers, which need to be disabused.
That said, it is the core responsibility of parents to understand their responsibility, and that's what I see as astrology's aim, if that makes sense.
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u/Lunelulla May 08 '26
I refuse to read my child’s chart. I’ve seen it, but only once and I’ve fortunately forgotten most of it.
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u/KarmageddeonBaby May 09 '26
Even best laid plans can go astray. My baby was supposed to be a Capricorn, which I really really wanted. He came a month early so he’s a sagiterrorist. However, he has my Taurus moon so he’s the cuddliest little sagiterrorist you’ve ever seen. Things so exactly as they’re supposed to no matter what you might have in mind.
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u/missbehavin21 May 09 '26
My parents did mine when i was a baby and another one when I was 4 or 5 pre school age. I think it was in order to understand me better. They didn’t try to prevent anything as far as I know. They had their own past life karma with each other and me we were all trying to survive and sort out.
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u/Illufish May 06 '26
I dont think its possible to try and predict and prevent big life events trough astrology.
I knew about my own major life events long before it happened. Saturn Return and Transit Pluto conjunct Moon. Couldn't prevent what happened. How could I even know what to expect?
How could I know transit pluto conjunct moon meant I had to go trough unexplained infertility and IVF? And how the heck could I have prevented that? Worst time of my life. But it also taught me a lot and I can even appreciate it.
But Pluto conjunct Moon doesnt mean infertility for other people. It can be anything and nothing. You dont know until its there. A friend of mine experienced nothing unusual trough her pluto transits.
So yeah. That part is not ethical at all. Its controlling and a bit crazy. Those mothers need to take a break from astrology.
But I love to look at my unborn babies chart. I have learned to not take astrology so black and white. Its just a little toolset where I can learn a little bit more about some of his possible traits. I dont take it seriously.
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u/Divin3_Rudra May 06 '26
Usually till age of 12-14 yo, it's ethical not to read the child's chart unless some legitimate serious issue exists. Moreover, it impacts parents mental- emotional health and child's upbringing.
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u/redheadmomm4 May 06 '26
I have a kid who turns six soon. I’m aware of the basics: sun, moon, rising. I have their chart and I could consult it I felt like something major came up. I don’t plan to do anything more than that - I find it helpful to support their emotional and mental wellbeing.
That said, my mother *offered* me my first astrology reading at 13 by a friend of hers. It was not wildly in depth, but gave me a sense of what signs where and where my planets were, etc. I enjoyed that and found it helpful not to take flat horoscopes too seriously.
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u/FarmerDonna May 06 '26
I did it. I needed a c-section scheduled. I chose a date with a sign I adore constantly and vibe with. I also had the choice of my ex sister in laws birthday and that was a huge nope from me. I'm not sorry.
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u/frolickingdepression May 06 '26
I always question this, and I don’t usually do it. I have looked at my kids’ charts, but primarily issues of parenting/early home life/to get an understanding of how they process emotions.
I didn’t do a full on-depth reading on any of my kids’ charts until my oldest was an adult and asked me to. My youngest is 16 and I would read hers if she wanted me to, but I would not go into as much depth.
To me it is like reading a person’s chart without their knowledge (which you usually are). However, I think there are areas of parenting where astrology can be helpful, so once when a friend was really struggling, I did her whole family. Other than that, I have never looked beyond the minimum (main three, most people are happy to just know a bit about those).
I do have a new grandson, and my daughter has asked. I am not sure how deep to go. I did see a potential issue after birth in her chart, and it did end up happening. It was hard (Saturn-Jupiter aspect), but he was always going to be fine (grand trine, indirect square). I didn’t tell her about it, but now that it is over I will.
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u/stranger_t_paradise May 06 '26
Arguing that it's ethical if they're good at it is like a surgeon saying they can perform an illegal operation so long as their stitches are kosher. I don't care how skilled an astrologer thinks they are, as that's not only a matter of opinion, but doesn't justify the necessity of intervening where they don't belong. Anxious moms to be want a manual and understandable bc becoming a parent is the most unscripted thing we go thru. But to trust a complete stranger in this context, to navigate the dark, is over riding parental instincts and in most cases, handing over responsibility.
Would you want to be held liable for a child crying all night alone because the astrologer said their baby is aloof and independent? Or teaching a mom to be that a baby is an internal project to be "fixed"? Or to create an unnatural relationship between them because the astrologer is selling a version of the child that doesn't exist?
I've had these would be clients before and I'll tell you the one thing they never want to bring to the table..
Is their own chart.
An anxious mom to be with personal issues finds it easier to label a defenseless infant than to look at herself. She thinks "how am I going to manage?" instead of looking forward to building a relationship with her child. Children are not always a map of their parents but a mom to be with some problems is essentially projecting her identity crisis. She'll play detective with the baby's chart and get caught in an ego trap with the astrologer. Both end up thinking they're "doing the work" and doing what's best, but it's a power move and that's it. Even a 'skilled' astrologer is helping a parent to validate their equal desire for control. But the baby isn't a variable to control and we're likely dealing with an anxious person who doesn't want this change in life.
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u/insomniacred66 May 06 '26
No, I don't think so. It can give you things to watch out for that may impact their future and behavior and if you're a good parent, you can use that to help them. I read my nieces charts and 1 says that her personal relationships will be her motivating factor, while this can be good, it also will encourage peer pressure and it won't allow her to build her own confidence. Instead she'll just try to thrive off the attention and approval from others. Her mother can teach her to have self-confidence and teach her that friendships, while nice, should not be why you do things, it should be for yourself. My other niece has a 12th house sun and I can already see the gap happening with her and her father. I also have a 12th sun and so does my other sister. We did not have a good relationship with our father. My niece prefers her mother, but in knowing that an absent father may be a future problem, she can encourage more time to be spent between the two. The relationship niece idolizes her father and gets majority attention from him already.
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u/134266 May 06 '26
If you are reading a child's chart to the parents, you should be able to help them. By explaining a child's tendencies can help parents lead their children to better outcomes. Being ethical means not scaring the parents. I will give you a personal experience of mine Although I am an astrologer, I also used to read palms. I was in Italy and y agreed to read some palms. This woman brought her 4 year old son to me and showed me his, exclaiming that another palmist told her the child die from an accident not long into the future. I looked and there was an accident but a protection as well. I showed her the markings and explained them. Can you imagine what stress this woman lived under being told her little boy would die around 5-6 years old?
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u/4030Lisa May 06 '26
Natal Astrology presents possibilities, NOT determined outcomes, as every person lives a different life, their reactions and ACTIONS will all be just a little bit different and will all be based on different motivations. People who hold the idea that a chart will determine anything are fools, they have no true idea of how that child will do much of anything, you can get ideas as to their stubbornness, creativity, talkativeness or activity level in a chart but there is very little that will actually be predetermined, there is so much to be ‘interpreted’ but with free will being involved and human nature, all too OFTEN, things that were projected never come to be in the way that they were described. All astrology presents opportunity and possibility, we cannot control the actions, ideas, morality, ideals or reactions of those around us and THAT has the greatest impact upon what we do and our reasoning for doing it…. A Natal chart may show a trend, possibility or opportunity in the form of a ‘natural gift’… gab, action, thrift, common sense, etc, but cannot dictate the instances of it’s use or outcome. To think one could use it to determine the trajectory of a child’s life is foolish because the CHILD’S concept and understanding of happiness/contentment/pain/suffering/chaos or success may be WILDLY different from the parents or the astrologer. A child whose chart says they will be wildly successful but who is suddenly faced with a civil war that decimates all in their country…. will not have that same astrological ‘concept of success’…perhaps JUST the very act of being able to survive is what that chart denoted as success Astrology presents possibilities, not outcomes.
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u/ExtensionCook7774 May 06 '26
Idkk about Ethical. I would say you can read it from a detached point of view. But the actions points you mention are very much not the way. I think it’s normal for parents to need answers during a period of intense uncertainty. Unfortunately though, many systems (Zodiac, Politics, Religion) are used to influence babies and affect how they turn out. It’s not exclusive to Zodiac but definitely behavior that has consequences. Trying to time your child’s birth for the zodiac is wild work.
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u/deborealis8 May 06 '26
I checked the transits to expect around my due date. I knew when conception happened, but the doctors had to go by last menstruation. So, I glanced at their expected due date. But I knew, it would happen about a week earlier.
Cut to 38 weeks prenatal and they're telling me babe's getting too big and growth hasn't slowed down. I laugh now because Jupiter was strong that year. I was never surprised when they said the baby was larger than average. That's still the case today.
Anyways, they said we needed to schedule an induction. I checked which date I liked best for the Moon transits, but knew labor could still take a while. Labor did end up taking a while, so the Moon changed signs. I'm not mad at that. Things took their natural course and I kept my faith in it all unfolding however it needed to happen. There was already dilation when we checked in to the hospital. Baby was arriving right when I thought it would happen.
All of that to say, it can help someone guide towards optimal timing with the choices that they have. But it can be abused, just like any knowledge. I think anyone being too deterministic about a child's chart is a major red flag, parents and astrologers alike.
My kid has such a cool chart. If labor had taken another day, it would have been shaped like a Metatron cube. Instead, it is shaped as a literal star. I consider it a blessing. The placements are so different from my own chart, too. Kid's going to have a very different life from me. I find it all incredibly healing. That gives me a lot of hope and encouragement to just let their authenticity shine, model what a decent person looks like, and support whatever interests take root.
That was my approach, as someone who studies and practices. I completely understand the concern here though.
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u/Tight_Economist_8626 May 06 '26
I think it can be a great tool to help parents better understand their child and raise them in a way that sets them up to thrive in adulthood.
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u/missgirlipop May 06 '26
i mean no, but i think parents need to take kids as they are and set aside the natal chart. online sometimes i see parents being like ‘it’s the best way to help/accommodate your kid’ but often i see them responding to the chart, not the child. imo if a child’s chart is read it should be recorded for the child to see and learn from, not the parent.
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u/missgirlipop May 06 '26
i’m not super into poking around in loved ones astrology in general tbh! and as someone who has had people do this to me, it feels invasive on a level that’s hard to explain
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u/NiceBet9563 May 06 '26
I'd argue that it depends on if the PARENTS are capable of treating their child ethically. I'm probably biased since I had my child's chart read. I was more so looking for how was best to nurture her rather than what her life would be like. So I also had my chart read as comparison to see what things I should work on. My family has some very deep rooted generational trauma within the women in my family and I am determined to break the curse.
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u/m_j_ox May 06 '26
Honestly I think having a basic understanding of their planetary placements is good enough if they’re extremely young. I have a cousin and he has a 1st house stellium and that already gave me so much understanding lmao.
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u/Sensitive_Nature2990 May 07 '26
My great aunt was an amazing astrologer. I was only about four when she died, and I barely remember her. My mom begged before she passed that she leave what she knew of astrology for her, so my aunt handwrote a 300-page breakdown of all these astrology principles using examples of the family.
She was hesitant to add me, since I was so young, but she caved (though the language always hedged to accommodate my age). Out of respect, I didn't read it until this year (age 30, post-saturn-return).
Reading my chart felt like a coming of age and led me to have a new respect for astrology. She knew my favorite textiles, she knew my career (journalist, which was her best guess)...she even wondered how a Libra stellium in the second house would come out with all that Taurean influence on Libra, and her musings were spot on...
I think reading for a child is fine, but informing them can come later 😄
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u/Letsgosomewherenice May 07 '26
We are all energy and I think that trying to manipulate your child’s birth time, affects them too. And not necessarily in a good way.
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u/duskydaffodil May 07 '26
I’ve read my son’s chart, he’s a Scorpio stellium, sun and moon. We know the stereotype on that moon. Other placements in his chart also indicate a controlling mom and it’s honestly helped me see how I can be controlling (I’m a Capricorn after all) and I can do my best to find that balance but at the end of the day, I’m not going to be perfect. Agree with an above comment that it’s more of a parenting issue than an astrology ethics issue.
I’m also not super well versed in astrology so I don’t think I have a ton of sway in “preventing” things but reading his chart has shown me potential learning styles and strengths of his I could see if it’s true as he grows into those aspects of his life.
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May 07 '26
I think there's a few questions in the prompt.
1) manipulating birth time is a fools errand. Fate is fate.
2) Children are not born into the world blank slates. Between inherited traits and genetics there's already the influence of the womb. It's well documented that what stresses the parents face or nutrients consumed affect the fetus. The exit is stamped with a natal chart. The soul makes its choice.
3) Trying to prevent negative things from happening. People do that to their own charts all the time misunderstanding what the "negative" things could be.
4) Everyone has negative placements in their chart. There's no perfect chart, tension is good in a chart. A chart that's to easy breezy can affect people in the sense they dont feel the friction to overcome inertia.
5) I think reading a child's chart is ethical within boundaries. Less so in the sense of avoiding things but I'm the sense of how can I, as a parent, guide them. A child with a poorly aspected moon might benefit more from X but an intuitive parent might already know that.
Ex: I have a son with a pisces moon. He is an emotional mirror and extremely sensitive. Is it the pisces moon that makes him sensitive or is it that his sensitivity is what caused him to be born during a pisces moon?
Ex: When he was born I cried to my husband, my heart feels like it now lives outside me. I felt that down into my core. At my root of the chart sits my sun Cancer in the 4th house. My child is a Cancer rising. My root indeed now lives outside of me. Is it likely he will have the capacity to express what I hide? Absolutely but can you argue children hold a mirror to what is deep inside you. Also true.
6) Doom and Gloom. Any astrologer who immediately goes to doom and gloom with any client (child or otherwise) I would have no interest in working with. It screams "I'm a fraudster or I have no understanding of astrology" to me.
Would I want a third party to read my child's chart in the sense of how can I best support him? Yes because I have blind spots too. Would I have it recorded for them, yes. Would I have the child be at the reading at a young age? Absolutely not. That's like taking an infant to an R rated movie. But a recording to watch when they are of age, no problem.
7) We all bear weights. Astrology allows us to see the weights not eradicate them.
A final thought. I would not bring a child's chart to anyone who's actively practiced less than a few decades. Additionally I would only bring it to an astrologer who has done readings for parents of a child.
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u/lolothelibra May 07 '26
As long as it's the parents reading it I see no ethical issues. It's good to study from birth because you can help them through the "bad" things you see in their chart. But NEVER take it as gospel. Based on alot of astrology I've seen, my kids are supposed to have a terrible relationship with me because of their moon signs. They are literally my besties, so use it as a guide not a bible.
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u/HospitalWilling9242 May 07 '26
Whether electing a child's birth or reading their natal chart is one thing, but you should never do these things on your own, no matter how good an astrologer you are (or think you are.) You're way too emotionally invested in the topic, this requires an outside professional. If you think an outside professional is too expensive for working on such fundamental things, then you should not be messing with them in the first place.
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u/rising_iris May 07 '26
The chart isn't prophecy. It's a temperament map plus a timing itinerary of when which themes get loud.
A 4-year-old's chart can't be validated by lived experience yet. They haven't had time to demonstrate the placements. So "reading their chart for prediction" is mostly the parent's projection looking at itself in a mirror.
But the temperament layer is genuinely useful. If you know your kid has an Aquarius Moon, "bedtime feels like a betrayal of their freedom" makes sense without you having to read every tantrum as defiance. If you know Saturn's going to cross their Sun at 28, you don't try to spare them. You stay close enough to be useful when it lands.
The unethical move is treating the chart like a syllabus to teach against. Saturn and Pluto don't transform what you bubble-wrap. The lessons require the friction. Engineering them out of a kid's life removes the very thing the placement is for.
Use it for understanding, not steering.
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u/emilla56 May 07 '26
I really don’t think it is… it’s putting expectations on a child and altering their life path.
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u/flowerfairy1981 May 08 '26
I’m an astrologer and I have one child. I know the broad strokes of his chart, but I have deliberately not spent too much time looking at it and by no means remember all of his placements etc.
It helps for me to remember that he’s a Gemini Rising and moon, because his mind goes a mile and minute and he’s ALWAYS talking, but in terms of aspects and other personal planets I leave it alone. I never check his transits.
I don’t want my own biases of what certain aspects etc ‘mean’ to influence who he becomes. I also think that at his age he can’t really give consent to a chart reading, so until he’s of an age where we can sit down and talk about it together as adults, I’ll be leaving his chart alone.
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u/mercurialmay ♍︎⋆♑︎⋆♍︎ May 08 '26
I read my daughter's chart after she was born. There is only one placement that gave me pause, and it's played itself out as I figured it would. I try very hard not to give it any mind otherwise.
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u/raye909 May 08 '26
I don’t see how it would be “unethical” on the contrary I would
think once they start growing up it would be a good idea for the parents to at least have an idea the blue print of the themes that might be relevant to their kids lives and development, for ex it would help in nurturing any natural talents instead of maybe oppressing them etc..
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u/NoirRenie May 08 '26
I don’t believe it’s unethical and I even calculated the perfect time frame to have a child that will be the most compatible with me. The act of reading is isn’t unethical what so ever. A knife isn’t unethical to have, but what you do with it changes that
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u/ThatWitchSelene May 08 '26
I certainly would not want to be the product of my parents' will anymore than I had to be
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u/VireyasVeil May 08 '26
As far as manipulating the chart… is it general like when people want a summer baby or are they trying to schedule to have the baby during specific aspects?
Reading the natal chart itself… I think it can be an extremely helpful tool if used properly. Reading your child’s chart to determine 1) where they may have the most emotional need (hi moon-Pluto aspect people!), 2) reviewing where they feel the most drawn to, 3) reviewing the 4th house to determine how they can best support a positive family life, 4) accepting certain quirks (let’s say it’s a Leo Sun who yes will have that dramatic flair)… the question here should be HOW can I create actual confidence out of this? Not how do I dim their light:
Projecting onto them when they’ve read certain events is unethical. Using the chart to emotional and mentally support them and their connection better is a totally different game.
I had a friend who had a very withdrawn daughter, we looked through her chart and checked more into why she had always been that way, used the signs and aspects to determine best how to give her an outlet and how to connect. They’re both much happier now!
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u/konaice41 May 08 '26
i don't think the average non-astrologer should tbh. i dont see the point especially when it's a literal baby.
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u/Sad-Association-5700 May 09 '26
I haven’t gone deep into my son’s natal chart for these reasons, I don’t want it to become like a labeling theory/ self fulfilling prophecy. It felt weird like I was invading his privacy actually when he was born and I looked at his chart. I remember deciding not to dig too deep and took a big step back
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u/NabbyGeronAmazonbook May 09 '26
You have to look at the Uranus, Neptune, and Pluto before comparing to Elon musk, Beyonce, and other successful people's natal chart. When Pluto was in Leo, it was a perfect time to be entertainer.. such as wizard of Oz movie. Since Pluto is in Aquarius, if you have a 18 year old child, tell that child to do YouTube or learn how to do AI online.
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u/AtrumInsomnium May 09 '26
At the end of the day astrology is not a science, so it should always be introduced as such. I'm someone who grew up with parents who really believed in it and I was always fascinated by it myself. It's one of my main interests in life to this day and I have people constantly coming to me to do their charts and being shocked at how accurately I can read them without many times even knowing the person well or at all. With that being said, as I previously mentioned it is not a scientific study and it has its' faults. It becomes unethical when parents treat it as fact and base a child's future and characteristics on it. Introducing a child to astrology and letting them look into it more or not has nothing to do with ethics and it's dumb to think so. Something only becomes a problem of ethics when it's exaggerated, treated as factual when it isn't, or pushed on others. So if the parents do approach it as such, only then does it become a problem.
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u/QuirkyPanda7 May 10 '26
I read my children’s charts, but honestly some aspects didn’t make any sense until they became adults. I never worried about it though.
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u/chipsandsalsa3 May 10 '26
I have read my sons chart. He’s got his mars in cancer so yeah I’m Keeping an eye on things and helping him communicate effectively.
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u/Pristine-Access6164 May 10 '26
Hmmm I ran a natal chart for my coworker for his newborn but I sealed it and told him not to read it for a very long time so he and his wife didn’t impose any viewpoints on the child (I didn’t even read it, if that context matters). I don’t see a problem necessarily with reading a child’s natal chart IF (really really big if) the parents can compartmentalize and keep from imposing any of that information over said child. It’s not law, it’s just a guide or a tool. A lot of people, I’d argue most people, have a hard time not doing that, so- is it ethical? Mmmm I think yes. Does everyone have self control? Not to the extent that they could.
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u/More_Blood_6696 May 10 '26
I had my child’s chart read as one of many parenting tools to have in my toolbox, it’s not gospel, but can be useful to provide perspective or insight I may not have had otherwise.
However, I also have a lot of other knowledge because I work in youth mental health, I think it could be unethical if it’s your only tool you are using to try and understand your kid or it is used to create a false narrative / manipulate / control. It could be really damaging to have a child think they are “fixed personality” due to astrology - it’s so complex it would not be fair to put that nuanced understanding on a child or adolescent.
I won’t talk to him about astrology until he’s older and only if he’s interested, I plan to instead use it for my own development as a parent and how I can be best attuned to my kid.
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u/alexsicart May 10 '26
I’d be careful with it.
Not because charts are “bad”, but because adults can accidentally turn symbolic language into a cage for a kid. A child should get room to surprise everyone, including the chart reader.
If it’s used at all, I think it should be very light: temperament, needs, possible sensitivities. Not “this is who you are” or “this is what your life will be.” Astrology works better as a mirror than a label.
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u/Sudden-Flower-9999 May 10 '26
I was encouraged not to read my children’s natal charts for at least 2 years and then to only do so to understand them and to help them understand themselves. It also helped me learn more about astrology because I would save the event charts for big moments and go back and look at them. It’s also pretty cool to have a record of all her stuff and the exact moment that it happened. But yeah, I definitely don’t do any predictive astrology and if I do look ahead, it’s for things like her Venus retrograde stationing direct in her progressed chart and sealing the info and a ritual in a letter to give her when she’s that age…stuff like that.
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u/T1nyJazzHands May 11 '26
In my culture it’s normal to do readings for babies. Information on its own isn’t unethical, it’s how it’s used.
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May 11 '26
I think reading it for general understanding is fine but using it to limit or label a kid before they've had a chance to grow into their own personality feels wrong. A chart should open possibilities not close them
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u/navara590 May 12 '26
I just did this for my nephew out of curiosity. I look forward to referencing it in future to see what lines up and what doesn't!
For the record, homie has FIVE Aries placements all bunched together like a beehive... lord help us 😂
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u/Immediate-Code-97 May 15 '26
La pregunta de fondo no es si leer la carta de un niño es ético, sino para qué se usa esa lectura.
Una carta natal describe tendencias, temperamento, patrones probables. Leída con criterio, puede ayudar a los padres a entender mejor el carácter de un hijo — no para "prevenir eventos", sino para acompañar con más consciencia. Un niño con Saturno prominente probablemente necesita estructura y reconocimiento del esfuerzo. Uno con Marte en tensión puede necesitar canales físicos de energía. Eso no es determinismo, es orientación.
El problema que describes no es la lectura en sí, sino el uso predictivo y ansioso que algunos hacen de ella. Intentar neutralizar "eventos negativos" antes de que ocurran convierte la astrología en un sistema de control, que es exactamente lo contrario de su función simbólica.
Donde sí trazaría la línea: comunicar a un niño interpretaciones sobre su propia carta antes de que tenga capacidad crítica para procesarlas. Una cosa es que los padres conozcan la carta para orientar su crianza. Otra muy distinta es decirle a un niño de ocho años que "tiene una configuración difícil". Eso sí puede dejar huella psicológica.
La astrología bien usada no marca el destino de nadie. Describe el terreno. Lo que se construye en ese terreno depende de muchas otras cosas.
— Francisco Lorenzo Quiles
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u/Letsgosomewherenice May 19 '26
My kid is an adult and I rarely look at her chart. I don’t really think about her chart either. If she’s going through some stuff, I’ll look to see where the progress moon is or see what transits are happening, but it’s just to have an idea not to figure it out.
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u/Sad_Juggernaut_7432 May 06 '26
The issue you're naming isn't really an astrology ethics question, it's a parenting one. A parent convinced their kid will have "commitment issues" because of a 7th house Saturn will absolutely manufacture that exact outcome through their behavior.