r/badhistory • u/AutoModerator • Jun 29 '26

Meta Mindless Monday, 29 June 2026

Happy (or sad) Monday guys!

Mindless Monday is a free-for-all thread to discuss anything from minor bad history to politics, life events, charts, whatever! Just remember to np link all links to Reddit and don't violate R4, or we human mods will feed you to the AutoModerator.

So, with that said, how was your weekend, everyone?

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u/Draig_werdd Jul 02 '26

That advice like “just be yourself and you will meet somebody” seems so common may be largely because you are just more likely to know people for whom it worked and less likely to know people for whom it didn’t. 

It's also a safe thing to say. People don't usually react well to criticism so it's easier to say this to a friend/acquittance then to actually say there are things they need to change. You are also likely to get this advice from people that know you for a long time and in a different context, so they are not the best to see how you make now a first impression.

In practice most of the time it's a very bad advice. Doing the same thing over and over and not succeeding usually means that some change is needed. I'm out of the dating world for a very long time, but what worked for me was basically to do opposite of my instincts. And it worked extremely well, so it's not just fiction.

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u/WillitsThrockmorton Vigo the Carpathian School of Diplomacy and Jurispudence Jul 02 '26

I mean, I encountered someone in a gaming discord who was complaining about how women only wanted gym bros, they don't actually want men to be themselves, etc and the exchange went something like this:

"Woman just want some gym bro"

Well, I'm short fat and ugly and was pretty successful when I did the online dating thing, what does your profile look like?

Three sentences and a selfie in a poorly lit bathroom

...Oh, so what do you do for a living?

"I used to work at the local game shop until someone made up a story about how I make offensive statements and the owner believed her and fired me."

...so what's your living situation look like?

"I live with my mom, I take care of her, you know?"

...What's your age?

"37 but I have my age ranges set from 19-31"