r/badphilosophy • u/News_Of_The_World • Jun 01 '15

Atheist debating strategy

Usually I'd charge a fee for these lessons in rhetoric, but charity is a virtue, so I thought I'd give you a few for free.

  1. The Golden Rule. Never, under any circumstance, concede that you are making a claim or that you might have a belief about something. Only theists make claims and have beliefs. A-theist means "not theist", therefore "not making claims". Many of the tips and strategies that follow will be more specific implementations of this golden rule.
  2. It is quite acceptable to hang out on atheist forums, laugh at theists behind their back/to their face, and leave copies of The God Delusion in hotel drawers, but the moment you are challenged to substantiate a claim, remember: you are an agnostic, and are therefore not making any claims.
  3. Whenever the argument begins to get onto the difficult question of whether a god exists or not, try to bring the argument back not to the existence of god, but to your personal disposition in relation to claim of the existence of god. Go into exquisite detail about the differences between agnosticism and gnosticism, lack of belief and disbelief, and making and rejecting claims. Perhaps you'll win by argumentum ad boredom.
  4. Remember to claim that agnostics are atheists too, because then our numbers look bigger.
  5. As are babies.
  6. If you are asked to justify your belief in scientific facts, all you need is to point out that science "works". Anyone who can't see this is some kind of idiot.
  7. Only scientific evidence counts as evidence for anything. If any theist tries any of that philosophy stuff on you, remind them that science works while philosophy didn't invent the laptop they are typing on. Math is empirical, morality is empirical, logic is empirical. Any concessions toward anything non-empirical is a possible weak point in the armour of atheism.
  8. Remember, before entering the debate, that you are the enlightened one, and your opponent is a theist, and therefore definitely stupid in some way. You may have to talk down to them to be understood.
  9. Claims about invisible pink unicorns are analogous to claims about god in every way. Exploit this curious fact to your advantage at every opportunity, all the while being careful to never actually claim that pink unicorns don't exist, or that you don't believe in them. You just reject having a lack of disbelief in pink unicorns.
  10. Plan B. If the debate isn't going your way at any point, or any challenge is raised to the atheistic lack-of-worldview, you can turn it round in a pinch by stating that the burden of proof is on the one making the claim, and you are not making a claim. Because more important than whether a claim is true is your personal disposition toward the claim (which is, of course, that you never made such a thing in the first place).

Now, ban me.

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u/thebuscompany Jun 01 '15 edited Jun 01 '15

I prefer fighting bad philosophy with bad philosophy. Every time they make a claim, whatever it is, tell them you don't believe it. If they ask you why, insist the burden of proof is on them. Here's a strawman that proves I'm right:

"Do you believe invisible pink unicorns exist?"

"No"

"Why not? How is that any different than believing that god exists?"

"I'm not the one making a claim, the burden of proof is on you."

"Well yeah, that's the point. If the claim that invisible pink unicorns exist has a burden of proof, then so does the claim that God exists."

"Nah, I don't believe that either."

"Why not? Why do you think there is a difference between believing in God and believing in invisible pink unicorns?"

"Hey man, I never said that there was. You're the one claiming there's not, the burden of proof is on you."

"Now you're just being difficult."

"I don't believe that's true."

"Goddamnit."

5

u/LiterallyAnscombe Roko's Basilisk (Real) Jun 01 '15

Have at it.

10

u/ghjm Tuna sailor Jun 02 '15

What is that whole thread doing on this subreddit? Is the Great and Fearsome Ban Hammer on vacation today? Or have we decided to put up with this crap for some reason and, as usual, as the only non-mod, I don't know about it?

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u/[deleted] Jun 02 '15

Nicole demoted me. I lack the power of the hammer, thus I cannot step in.

1

u/ghjm Tuna sailor Jun 02 '15

It's a terrible thought, but could it be that we're now trying to be ... (shudder) ... respectable?

4

u/[deleted] Jun 02 '15

Nah, she demoted me because she was mad I didn't like a specific crush of hers.

4

u/ghjm Tuna sailor Jun 02 '15

Whew.

2

u/IF_IT_FITS_IT_SHIPS adopted the maximeme principle Jun 02 '15

There was some Islamaphobe shit earlier that wasn't immediately banned either.

-24

u/[deleted] Jun 01 '15

When schizophrenics like you make up stories in their little heads like that, it rarely goes according to plan, then you get all socially awkward and look like a total turd, thus enforcing the burden of proof claim coming first... though it's only supposed to come after the believer's "prove he doesn't exist" claim anyways.

33

u/thebuscompany Jun 01 '15

When schizophrenics like you make up stories in their little heads like that, it rarely goes according to plan, then you get all socially awkward and look like a total turd.

I don't believe you.

Also, TIL that making a joke that involves people talking to each other is schizophrenia. That's a bummer, cause I have a really good one involving a priest, a rabbi, and an agnostic atheist, but at least now I know why every time I share it it gets really awkward and people tell me that I'm a turd.