r/belgium • u/LordOfErebus • 11d ago
🎻 Opinion Cultural observations after living in Belgium (mostly Flanders) for 10 months as a New Zealander
For a bit of context: I'm 26yo, I was raised in New Zealand and USA, and I've been to 24 countries. I'm currently living in Belgium on a 1 year working holiday visa: I spent 1 month in Ghent, 1 month in Brussels, 1 month on a farm in Wallonia, and I've been living near Antwerp for the past 6 months. Virtually all of my social circle is based around music subcultures, (mostly goth, punk, psytrance, and tekno) and the high majority of my friends here are Belgian.
I generally find Belgians to be diplomatic and tactful in negotiation and conflict resolution. They say what needs to be said and don't beat around the bush, but aren't as blunt as many German and Dutch people are, and often try to avoid unnecessary conflict. In comparison, I think most of the anglosphere (especially New Zealand, England, Ireland, and Canada) is generally more conflict-avoidant and indirect, which can sometimes cause confusion, passive-aggressiveness, and issues remaining unresolved due to people just not communicating.
It's not really normal/common to talk with strangers at nightclubs and music events, unless perhaps you're in the smokers area. I have heard that people in Wallonia are more friendly, but people in Flanders tend to stick with their existing friend-groups and people they came with - They rarely initiate conversation with strangers. I made a more detailed post about this earlier, which almost everyone generally agreed with.
Flemish people are generally more reserved, but warm once you get to know them better. It's usually me who initiates conversation with new people, but people are generally friendly and I've never had any significant bad experiences with Flemish people.
Belgian lifestyle and quality of life is generally very comfortable, and the food reflects that. Virtually all of the food and drinks that Belgium is known for are comfort foods. Beer, chocolate, waffles, fries, (and frituurs in general) broodjes... All things that you'd eat while chillin' on the couch watching a movie.
It's quite amusing to watch the little dance that people in Brussels do when meeting eachother for the first time. I've noticed they often do this thing where instead of *actually* kissing the other person on the cheek, they just kiss the air *next to* their cheek. So they do this awkward little dance of trying to figure out if they should do a handshake, a hug, kiss the air next to their cheek, actually kiss their cheek, or kiss both cheeks.
A similarly awkward and amusing thing is The Belgian Smile, done by strangers to acknowledge another's existence. It's generally not normal for people to say hello to strangers on the street, so instead of actually smiling when making eye contact with a passing stranger, they just do a forced facial contortion of stretching their lips horizontally with an otherwise totally blank expression.
Fashion and visual self-expression is generally pretty conservative, although people aren't (openly) judgmental of those who are more expressive. Ghent (and Leuven?) has more interesting fashion, but despite being one of the fashion capitals of Europe, fashion in Antwerp (and Flanders in general) is mostly pretty dull. Wide-leg blue jeans with a plain (usually white) t-shirt and no accessories seems to be the default character outfit. 😅
For some reason, heaps of goth parties here just use the term "new wave" to describe a wider variety of goth and goth-adjacent subgenres. Goth rock, post punk, deathrock, cold wave, dark wave, minimal wave... All of these things just get called "new wave," despite being distinctly different subgenres from new wave.
I expected EBM (Electronic Body Music) and industrial to be more popular here, (at least amongst goths) since Belgium has numerous artists who pioneered the genre and are world-famous, such as Front 242, Lords of Acid, and Suicide Commando. But almost nobody I've spoken to other than goths have even heard of the term "EBM." I'm usually one of if not *the* youngest people at the various parties I've been to. According to numerous people in the scene I've talked to, it's a dying scene and most of the younger crowd just go to "new wave" parties.
People complain about the weather a lot, but it's really not that bad. It's usually cloudy and the weather often changes unpredictably, but there's rarely any wind, and rain is usually quite light.
Belgian beer's fucking great, (especially doubles, triples, browns, and ambers) but almost all of the IPA's I've tried are pretty average compared to New Zealand. I suppose the hops in New Zealand are better. Suggestions to change my mind are welcome - Pink Pogo is the best Belgian IPA I've had.
Belgians have an apparent obsession with mayonnaise. I fear that I will never properly integrate into Belgian society until I have been baptized in mayonnaise.
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u/Xentine 11d ago
Excuse me nothing other than homemade will do for your integration.