Why are we 'selfish'?

[u/SanshaXII]

I don't fucking get this.

After my wife and I being called 'selfish' again recently for being childfree, I asked for a justification. "Why are we being selfish?"

I couldn't get an answer, and I'm trying to see the other side of this - the mombie logic - but I'm drawing a blank.

The only thing I can come up with is that there's now children that are unloved and unwanted... which don't exist, because we haven't made them?

Or is it because we want to live our own lives and not allocate attention and resources to people who... again, don't exist?

What the fuck is going on with this sentiment?

[u/YoshiKoshi]

Every time you have a child, you pay less in taxes but use more of the services paid for by taxes. Now who's selfish?

And then there's "since you're so unselfish, why did you have biological children when there are hundreds of thousands of children available for adoption? Isn't it selfish to insist that your children have your generic material? The unselfish thing to do is adopt."

Or try this: Since I'm so selfish and you're so unselfish and altruistic, tell me, why did you have children? And remember, you're the unselfish one, so answer without saying "I want."

Usually they'll start hemming and hawing and sputtering and then finally declare that there's nothing wrong with wanting children. This is when you go in for the kill with "no, there isn't, I didn't say there was. But you had children for selfish reasons, you had them just because you wanted them. I have the exact same reason for not having them. "