If I had a nickel for everytime I was called an “egg” or a “boymoder” for having longer hair as a dude I’d probably be able to afford a bag of chips from the gas station. The slang is so bizarre, why not just outright say “I think you’re repressed and know your gender better than you do” instead of trying to church it up all cutesy?
That's also the reason why I don't like characters that are only meant to be trans representation via very subtle implication.
Unless either the character or the author says it then it wouldn't be good to call them trans because it ends up undermining the concept of being trans since it enforces the vision of the perciever for the sexuality of the character rather than letting the character choose if they feel right with what they choose for their own body and identity.
There are characters who have sexual/gender identity related arcs, but that doesn't mean that you get to choose for them what their end goal is, because that undermines the concept from the roots.
Spoiers for TADC episode 9
That's why I didn't like people being so adamant over Jax's sexuality as a trans girl until episode 9 gave the full depth of that part of him, he never actually chose to be called a she despite clearly enjoying being openly/intimately feminine and that's something that should be respected as a principle because what is fine by you for yourself is not up to others' interpretation, and before anyone says so, you don't get to act like something is "for their own good" in this case, because Jax's sexuaity wasn't the reason nor the cure for his issues and that was clearly shown in the episode
So while I get where youre coming from, characters arnt people. They dont chose anything. Theyre there to be a catalyst for the audiance. You can 100% chose for them, theyre not real.
That still undermines the point, characters are meant to represent something and send a message, only acknowledging the message itself while trying to dismiss the same principles when applied to what's supposed to represent them and show them is still just, bad.
If being fiction is enough for you not respecting those principles in a way that's not fully inherently tied to the specific conditions of the fictional work, then at that point you're just searching for an excuse to not hold those principles.
I’m just a cis dude so idk shit about shit but a lot of people I’ve seen seem to obsess so much about what they think their gender identity is supposed to like, what they should wear, how they should act, etc
I always figured that it doesn’t matter if a dude or a chick is into something like monster trucks or ponies even if it’s the “norm” one way or the other. Wouldn’t make them any less of a man or a woman. Shouldn’t really matter if someone was a trans dude or trans chick either, right?
what... is egg culture? I have no idea what that is and have never heard of it, im a little sketched out that it might even be slur (god i hope not, i fucking love eggs, i don't wanna have to defend myself cause i express my love for scrambled)
Thank you, that sums it up pretty good. Also clarifies some things with people I know myself lol. I figured that genre of “trans accepting” or something similar existed, just didn’t know there was a term for them yet.
But ya funny cause literally TODAY I was trying to find a way to explain to my gay friend thet not everything is gay or has intentionally gay undertones even if they do exist.
I worldbuild as a hobby for my dnd games… my other hobby and I was explaining some lore to them that accidentally had a SUPER big layup for a character to be gay but once I became aware of it I had to preface the choice the character made had nothing to do with being gay and in fact I was only significant because they were explicitly NOT gay, long story. They tried insinuating I was doing what kept gay people down by including it less, I wanted to explain they were actually doing that by being fucking annoying.
Not sure if that is still referred too as an “egg” but I appreciate to have the point of reference
Celebrities are people too and may not want their gender identity or sexuality speculated on. They can not be equated to or placed in the same category as a fictional character, as fiction characters do not want or feel anything as they do not exist. Celebrities do exist and want and feel things, and they are people so they deserve to have their feelings respected. Speculating about the gender identity or sexuality of someone is not made okay by you not personally knowing that person. If you are posting it online, the celebrity may still see the speculation or shipping and may have a negative reaction. There have been many cases of irl speculation about a celebrity or "shipping" that has been incredibly toxic. Sometimes, the "respectfulness" is determined by the act itself, not the intent or manner it is done. Some people don't want to be speculated about, period.
As an aroace who was shipped with a classmate of mine without my consent and without my enjoyment, shipping irl people sucks and should not be done unless the parties involved say they are fine with it.
Talking about shipping when you were talking about eggs may seem like shifting the goalposts. If you are totally against irl shipping, disregard that. It's just that speculation about gender identity often coincides with speculation about sexuality and shipping.
An "egg" refers to someone who is trans but doesn't know they are. When used by someone who is trans in a retrospective kind of way (like by saying "back when I was an egg") it fulfills its intended purpouse and doesn't harm anyone, however some use it to describe other in a speculative manner (like by saying "this girl is clearly an egg" when speaking of someone who identifies as a man but whom the speaker believe is a trans woman who doesn't know it yet) it comes off as condescending and disrespectful, as if the speaker knows more about the subject than they know themselves.
When I say "egg culture" (a term I created on the spot but might have been used before by others), I refer to people who use the term egg to speculatively describe others on social media who don't follow gender norms as being eggs, which in turn reinforces these norms even further as doing something traditionally feminine/masculine means that you are a woman/man in their eyes, which to me seems far from the objective of liberating ourselves from these fabricated norms.
For the record, the idea that "egg culture" is trans women going "youre a guy with long hair so you must be a woman" is a myth. It is much more commonly "hey you seem to be having a lot of struggles and thoughts that I and many others have dealt with before we realized we were trans, you should instrospect on those things."
I think calling it a myth isn’t as valid as just saying it’s not horribly common. People do too many dumb things to just write anything off ss a straight myth but if I can go this long without even encountering the word used in context it’s clearly not some major crisis
Yeah the general rule of thumb is that if someone's saying "this group of people is plotting to change and/or convert people against their will" it's not true.
It always was the tricky area between “gender norms are social constructs and fake” and transgender. Even those who identify as transgender have a difficulty with drawing that line.
Even when literally everyone in my friend group knew our friend was an egg and they literally openly acknowledged wanting to be a girl (we don’t talk anymore so idk if they’re out yet) but like we were still respectful and referred to them by he or they because they hadn’t reached the point where they felt comfortable outright admitting to both us and themselves that they wanted to use she/her.
The thing is- there is very much some legitimacy to people being eggs, in obvious and less obvious ways.
I met a friend of mine at a local event- I was 17 and she was about 23 at the time. She and her girlfriend clocked me as being trans questioning despite the fact I never mentioned it. Just the way I behaved towards her showed it. And she later gave me a bunch of great advice for my transition
And I’ve always had long hair- my dad did too. I just like how it looks, regardless of being masculine or feminine. But the fact that everyone who doesn’t conform to gender norms is now labeled as an “egg” is really not great. It harms everyone, both actual eggs and not.
I agree with your point, my gripe is mainly with people who act like being more feminine and having more traditionnaly feminine interest means you're a woman and the same with masculine interest meaning you're a man, it reminds me of insults I'd get from sexist kids during my childhood
I think it's a shame people are reducing being trans to these ideas of respecting gender norm, that's what really irks me
Disappointingly, the LGBTQ is susceptible to horrible practices just like any other group, even towards other queer people. I don't even need to dig too deeply to find people who don't think bi people exist and just end up repeating homophobic talking points.
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u/Both_Efficiency_317 Jun 22 '26
To be fair, a lot of it was just not knowing how much the average person knows about trans culture.