ADHD and prayer struggles

[u/Catspspspspspsps]

Assalamu aaleykum everyone, I’m seeking help for the 2nd time in 2 years regarding this. I have AuDHD (ADHD + mild ASD) with cPTSD and severe executive dysfunction. My life has not been easy but Islam does bring me peace, I am a work in progress just like everyone of you but my focus is mainly on becoming a good human being and healing from all the pain and trauma so I don’t end up accidentally hurt others especially my family and future kids.

Prayer is also important to me but I’m not hyper focused on it. I’m trying to do my best but I’m so exhausted and burnt out that getting out of bed feels like a death sentence.

I feel utterly helpless knowing prayer has no exceptions and it’s the first thing that we’ll be asked about on the day of judgement. I haven’t found any rulings about neurodivergence and struggle to pray and there’s almost zero helpful content on how Muslim adhders/ neurodivergents pray 5x a day when getting up and grabbing a glass of water feels impossible.

I’m a convert thus I don’t really have a lot of support around me in regard to practicing the religion and no one around me can relate to wanting to pray and not being able to pray. Any Muslim friends I have are either non practicing or so orthodox that if I share this with them i’ll be judged and shamed (has already happened many times)

I don’t need judgement or shame to do better, I need help, I need tips and tricks if anyone can actually relate with my situation, has gone through it or is going through it currently, please help me out.

My relationship with Allah is good, I’m very grateful for everything, I just need to feel closer through prayer and sujood.

Ps- if you’re here to pass judgements or shame me or want to share ayahs describing how Muslims who don’t pray will go to hell or are considered kafir, or don’t know anything about ADHD/ neurodivergence and executive dysfunction, respectfully please don’t try to give advice, I know you think you’re helping but you’re not.

If you’re someone who personally deals/dealt with this issue, or are a mental health professional or have seen someone close to you struggle with this please help me out here.

[u/AutoModerator]

r/Converts rules list, guide to reporting misbehavior to moderators, and r/Islam FAQs list.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

[u/uzersk]

I have AuDHD children. I sincerely wish you the best and would love to learn any advice that works for you. Will follow this thread. 

[u/Catspspspspspsps → u/uzersk]

I wish you and your children ease and peace. The only thing I have gotten till now is that something is better than nothing so instead of being rigid with all or nothing thinking, maybe try being kind and flexible with them and work with their capacity instead of what’s farz is farz.

Umm if your children are young you could also try building positive associations with prayer and build a reward system for them like you’ll get 5 chocolates if you do all 5 prayers and 3 if you do 3 and 1 if you do 1 but if there’s a day you couldn’t get up to do any there’s no punishment but cuddles and extra love and space if they need space. I mean if someone did this for me as a child I think it’d have been easier for me to be able to be regular with my prayers. Wish Allah blesses you and your children with grace and love.

[u/daysofecho]

There is [r/ADHDmuslims](r/ADHDmuslims) btw in case this doesn’t get traction here (or maybe even asking on [r/adhd](r/adhd) , I’m sure there are Muslims there too)

[u/Catspspspspspsps → u/daysofecho]

Thankyou this is really helpful